Garrison
Ican’t believe I did that. I should be terrified right now. I’m not stupid. I heard the way they all reacted to Kingston and Camden moving in together. Even if it was just a rumor, I couldn’t stand it.
Rage soared through me, hearing their bullshit. No excuses for any of them because it was shitty. And I’d had enough.
I just couldn’t do it anymore.
I don’t want to hide anything.
So, I said it. And maybe I shouldn’t have, but it was the most freeing moment of my life.
We won the game, despite my confession right before it and everyone on the team apparently being shocked and stunned stupid. And now, I’m in Oakley’s truck, heading out to his place, but he won’t say a word to me.
I know he was surprised. And it hurt when he took a step away from me in the locker room, but I’m hoping that he’ll process it and still be my friend. Because he was who I was really worried about.
He’s my best friend. He’s always been there, and if he hates me now, I’m not sure I’ll be able to stand it. “Just say something,” I plead.
His eyes darken and he suddenly pulls off to the side of the gravel road, putting the truck in park and looking at me. “You’re gay.”
It’s not a question, but I answer him anyway. “Yes.”
He stares at me, fire and anger in his eyes like I’ve never seen before, and it fucking hurts. “You never told me.”
Again, not really a question, but I feel like I need to answer him. “I wasn’t sure how you’d feel about that. Clearly, I was right to be a little nervous,” I add and kind of feel like an asshole for it, but I can’t believe he’s mad about this.
“You’re fucking gay, and we’re best friends.”
I wince again because fucking ouch. “Jesus. You can’t catch it, Oakley.”
He pulls back, looking like my words sting. “I know that, asshole,” he snaps, pointing to his chest. “You never fucking told me. We are best friends. I would have had your back.”
I stare at him, my turn to be stunned. “What?”
He rolls his eyes at me, still clearly pissed-off. “You could have told me. What kind of asshole do you think I am? You really think I’d care?”
I . . . I did. Shame hits me, but still, I can’t picture him being totally fine with this. “Yeah. I guess I thought you would.”
“I don’t,” he snaps quickly. “I just care that you kept it from me. That you just spit it out there with everyone around, and I didn’t say anything. I’m mad at myself for not saying something. But I wasn’t prepared for that.”
I stare at him, frozen. Because of everything that was whirling around in my head before, I never considered that scenario.
That he just didn’t see it coming and froze.
Oakley never freezes. He’s even more impulsive than I am.
“I didn’t plan to do that. Not like that. I wanted to tell you for a long time.”
“Why didn’t you?” He seems less pissed-off and more sad now.
“I was afraid.”
“You’re Garrison Fucking Dixon. You aren’t afraid of anything. You’re fearless.”
“I was afraid,” I say again because I know I have a big personality.
Maybe I developed it over the years, hoping no one would see my truth or maybe that’s just who I am.
I don’t really know, but this has been plaguing me for a long time.
“I’m not ashamed of being gay. I know it’s not a choice, and it’s part of who I am, but I know what’s around me.
I know where I grew up, and I didn’t think you’d understand, since you’re straight. That’s all you know.”
“I know you.” He punches me in the arm and grins. “And I don’t give a shit who you’re attracted to. You’re my best friend.”
“You’re mine too.”
He nods his head slowly, thinking it over. “You can tell me stuff. Always.”
I smile to myself because I’ve always told him everything except for this, and now that it’s out, there’s no more of that heavy weight dragging me down. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before.”
He shrugs. “I get it. I’m a loudmouth, and the guys say stupid shit. But you have to know, at the end of the day, I’ll always have your back.”
I nod, thinking about the shock on his face and how he froze, but I didn’t see hate there. I think what I saw was sadness that he didn’t know. “I promise to give you way too many details about my life, going forward.”
He snorts at that, starting the truck and pulling back onto the road. “You still wanna go to the party? I’ll punch anyone who says anything stupid.”
I laugh but shake my head. “Nah. I just want to go home.”
“You don’t have to hide, Garrison.”
“I know.” And for whatever reason, I do know that. I can handle it. And I have Oakley on my side, who was really the only one I was worried about besides my father. “I’m just tired. I’ll deal with that another day.”
“Okay.”
He drives me home and punches my shoulder in a goodbye again before I flip him off and go inside, happy my parents are asleep.
I lock my door and unlock my window, hoping like hell I’ll have a visit later tonight.
Because I really don’t know what he thinks about the locker-room confession.
But I’m pretty sure he’s freaking the fuck out.