Chapter 19
CHAPTER
NINETEEN
DILLON
“ C ap, look out!” Buchanan yelled, and for a split second, everyone slowed down like they were running in molasses. Each passing second was tracked by the buh-bump of my heart against my ribs as anticipation and adrenaline surged through me. Beads of sweat trickled down my temples and slicked my back until my undershirt stuck to my skin. I gritted my teeth, muscles tensed, and watched the play unfold before me.
Buchanan was twenty yards down the field from me to the right while McCormack sprinted in the opposite direction in an attempt to split open the defensive line. I rocked back onto my right foot, pivoted on my toes, and lined up my throw to Vieck—who had somehow managed to find open space. The ball left my hand on the perfect arc for it to be delivered directly into his waiting arms as he ran a breakaway toward the end zone.
“Fuck, yes,” I growled, pounding my fist on my chest and ripping my helmet off, ready for the line change. The second string weren’t as strong, but Coach had us playing mixed matches against them, not only to push us but also to see if anyone showed enough talent to usurp us from our starting spots. He’d put the whole team on notice after we lost our game last weekend.
“Cap! Fucking move!” Stevens bellowed. The urgency in his voice registered, and the world snapped back like a rubber band and resumed at full speed. I managed to blink before I was lifted off my feet as tree trunk-like arms wrapped around me and I crashed into the grass under a shit ton of weight.
“You stupid fucker,” Chad spat at me and kneed me in the gut as he stood up. “You’re going down, and you’re gonna fucking stay down, Hargraves.” He dusted off his cleats and sauntered down field while I lay paralyzed.
“Fuck!” I smashed my helmet into the earth. Today was going to shit, and I had a feeling it was only going to get worse.
After a dressing down from Coach of epic proportions, I stormed out of the locker room while the rest of the guys were still in the shower. Coach glared at me the whole time he was reaming the guys like I was personally responsible for them playing like they were a fucking peewee team. If I’d have stayed in there a minute longer, my fist would have found its way into a few faces, and I’d probably have been kicked off the team. Which sounded really fucking appealing right about now.
My stomach growled, reminding me that I hadn’t eaten anything other than a protein shake after my early session in the gym. Rather than heading to the dorms to dump my shit, I changed direction to the cafeteria. I should be early enough to get a decent amount of food. The guys could chew me a new one when they came in. I just didn’t give a fuck.
The one thing you could rely on at Briar U was the outstanding array of food they made available to the athletes here. May was probably the only person on campus I wasn’t a raging asshole to, and she smiled at me as I dragged my tray along.
“Long time no see, Dillon. You doin’ alright?”
“Could be better, May.” She gave me a sad smile, understanding shining in her eyes. Her son had been on the hockey team when he matriculated here, so she knew how tough it could get for us, not just physically, but psychologically.
“What sounds good today?” I pointed out everything I wanted, loaded up two plates, and grabbed a water and Gatorade. After paying, I swept my gaze over the room and headed for the empty table in the back corner. All I wanted was some damn peace, away from prying eyes. I wanted to eat without every fucker coming to tell me how much they loved me or how shit they thought I played. I wanted to scream at them, “Trust me, I know I sucked. Every dick with a mouth told me the same. How about you join the team, and then you can tell me how shit I am.” But no, I was the one who had to lead by example as the captain. If the Ravens won, people loved us, but if we lost, everyone became a fucking critic.
“Fuck.” I growled and slumped onto my chair. I kicked my aching legs out under the table, and picked up a slice of pizza. I polished off the three slices and was about to start on my pasta when the one person I couldn’t get out of my head walked in. Jamie stole my breath whether he was in skinny jeans and an oversized hoodie, or skin-tight leather pants and a see-through mesh top like the other night.
When he was walking across the quad, arms linked with his friends, it was like the world faded away, and the only thing I could see was him. No one else existed. My feet had moved of their own volition, and before I knew it, I was striding towards him until Buchanan grabbed my arm and stopped me. I wanted to knock him the fuck out. I wanted to claim Jamie as mine right there and then. But I didn’t. I couldn’t. He was going to hate me when all this came out, but I’d hate myself more.
He was a drug, and this was one addiction I never wanted to be cured of.
Jamie was a walking wet dream and he had no goddamn clue. Girls, guys, and every asshole in between watched him, wanted him. My little crow broke hearts without even trying, but he was untouchable. I’d made sure of that. People could mess with him, but no one could touch him without finding themselves ostracized on campus, much like he was. It seemed everyone had got the memo. Everyone but Ava Barnes and Malachi Edmunds.
My eyes tracked his progress through the different stations. May lit up when he reached her, and it warmed my heart. Even after everything I’d put Jamie through, he still brought sunshine wherever he went. And I just kept digging my own grave deeper every day.
“Oh shit,” I muttered as I lifted the Gatorade to my lips and downed half the bottle, eyeing the fucking queen bee bitch strutting in like she was on a damn catwalk. Her gaze met mine and a malicious grin slashed across her face, turning my blood to ice. I clenched my jaw so hard I was amazed I didn’t crack a tooth. Unease slithered through me as Elise practically bounced through the line with a fully loaded tray, her gaggle of sycophants strolling behind her. They were like a pack of rabid wolves baying for blood and stirring up unrest wherever they went. Their numbers seemed to swell as they followed in Elise’s wake. Students parted like the Red Sea to let her through, and she held the rapt attention of everyone in the cafeteria, student and faculty alike.
It was like I was stuck in the Matrix, suffering from déjà vu. I could see exactly what she intended to do, but no matter how fast I tried to move, the distance between me and Jamie didn’t get smaller. It was like every student got in my way. I watched in horror as she dumped what could only be described as a vat’s worth of marinara sauce over Jamie’s head. A crowd massed around them, cheering her on as the final drops of sauce fell over his head and dripped down his face. Phones, cameras, and laptops were trained on him. My phone blew up with notifications, most likely from what just transpired.
His gut-wrenching cries hit me like artillery fire, stealing the breath from my lungs and nearly knocking me off my feet. I tried to push my way through the hoard of spectators, but I couldn’t get through. Every way I tried to move, someone blocked my path. Fury heated the blood in my veins as adrenaline surged through me. I needed to make her pay as much as I needed to save him.
Jamie slipped and fell to the floor, coating himself in even more sauce. Elise howled with laughter until tears melted the makeup off her face, revealing her for the monster she was. The feral grin she turned on me made me sick to my stomach. I fucking hated her and everything she stood for. She’d spent years trying to force me into being hers, but her presence made my skin crawl. I’d rather swim in lava than spend a minute in her presence.
“You fucked up this time, bitch,” I growled and wrapped my hand around her throat. A collective gasp rang out and made my spine stiffen. How could I have forgotten we were surrounded by a mob of students?
She smirked at me like this was the funniest thing ever. “I think not, Dillon.” She dragged a long blood-red nail down my chest, and I shuddered with revulsion. “You’re the one with your hand wrapped around my throat. I’m the poor helpless girl, half your size.” She whispered, “All I’d need to do is start begging, and then you’re off the team. I can even make sure you’re kicked out of Briar U. So tell me, what do you want to do?”
I sucked in a sharp breath as her threat landed and the knowledge of everything I stood to lose. I was in shark-infested waters with her—she was as dirty as her old man. I was trapped with no way out. No one was ever safe around her, and right now, she could end my life before it even began. “This is over,” I snarled and dropped her like the sack of shit she was. I walked away as she started wailing, doing anything to control the narrative, to make herself the victim.
The corridor was quiet when I made it out of the cafeteria, the eerie silence a shock to the system. I looked left and right for any sign of Jamie, but I couldn’t see him anywhere. My heart was working its way up my throat. I wanted to smash something. I clenched my fists as I tried to think where the closest restroom was. Maybe I should be logical and start there.
“Dillon!” Buchanan shouted as he ran towards me gasping for breath. “I think he’s heading back to the dorms. You need to help him.”
“Shit,” I cursed and broke into a run. I didn’t get far before I heard Jamie’s hollow cries. I skidded to a stop and rounded the corner on silent feet. There he was, curled in on himself and tucked away in a shadowed alcove. I dropped to my knees, hands outstretched, and slowly shuffled toward him. Jamie didn’t move, didn’t react to my presence at all. My heart shattered at his hapless cries. “Little crow? Can you look at me?”
Jamie sucked in a wet breath and raised his head. A river of tears had washed some of the drying sauce off him, but it did nothing to hide his anguish. His distraught features were pinched, his eyes red-rimmed. He looked fucking broken, and I broke alongside him. This all happened because of me, but I couldn’t deny that Elise took some kind of sick pleasure in humiliating him in front of half the student body. Just thinking about it made my stomach revolt, and a fresh wave of anger swelled inside me.
“Come here, baby. Let’s go and get you cleaned up.” Jamie shook his head but didn’t fight me when I hauled him into my arms. He felt so perfect against me, like he was made for me.
“T-thank you, Dil.” A wan smile ticked up his lips as he wrapped his arms around me and buried his face in the crook of my neck. He inhaled a deep breath, and it stirred a primal part of me, making me smile because he found my scent comforting.
We luckily made it to the locker room without anyone seeing us. He didn’t deserve this, no matter how shitty our past. He deserved better. I was childish, emotionally stunted, and fucking terrified I’d lose my shot at the only life I could see as an escape. I was a fucking selfish prick. Initially, I didn’t care how much this hurt him, but now? Now that it’s real, I can’t do it. I can’t make him suffer any more than he already has. I want to come clean, be a grown up, and find out why he abandoned me. Hurt me. Betrayed me. But I’m terrified of losing him all over again. Even when I want to make things better for him, I always make it about myself.
I shouldered our way through the door, careful not to hit Jamie’s head on the frame and made our way past the lockers to the showers. My body vibrated, knowing I’d have to strip him out of his clothes to help him wash. My desperate cock thickened as images of his sweet body filtered through my mind. My fingers itched to touch his soft skin, and my lips begged for another taste. Just once more, then I’ll tell him the truth. But first, I need my fix. Selfish. Selfish. Selfish. But nothing was going to persuade me otherwise—he was my drug of choice, and I’d do anything for another hit.
“You still with me, little crow?” I whispered against his head. The tremors running through his body had started to calm, and his cries had softened to quiet sniffles and hiccuping gasps. Using the shower wall for support, I leaned in and flicked it on, giving it a chance to warm up before I took us under the spray. “Jamie?”
“I-I’m okay,” he murmured and nuzzled into my neck. The gentle puffs of his breath eased some of the rage inside me, and a smile curved my lips as he melted into me.
“We’re going to need to wash this off, baby.” I chuckled, trying for some levity, and he snorted. “As much as I love marinara sauce, I don’t fancy it being the only thing I can smell for the rest of my life.” Another quiet grunt came from him as his fingers started to tease the hair at my nape. I loved it when he touched me like this; I’d suffered from withdrawals after he disappeared. He used to touch me all the time; it was like he couldn’t be apart from me. I’d refused for years to admit how much I’d craved it. Missed it. Needed him. Always needed him.
The sauce had started to dry, and it was tacky enough to irritate my skin. Our clothes would be stained beyond repair. I kicked my shoes off, and with Jamie still curled in my arms, I opened my locker and blindly reached in for my wash caddy. My fingers wrapped around the plastic handle, and I breathed a sigh of relief. I didn’t want to search Coach’s lost and found box, because that shit might have been there for years.
Steam billowed from the shower stall as I stepped in and closed the door behind us. My bare feet slapped against the tiles as I walked us straight under the pounding water. Jamie let out a screech worthy of a horror film victim, that made a laugh burst out of me.
“S-shut up,” he gritted out. He pulled back far enough for me to see his red-rimmed eyes. The pain that resonated in their pale depths was like a sucker punch to the chest, but the teasing smile fluttering on his lips pulled me into the here and now. “A shower in our clothes? That’s… novel.”
“Fuck you.” I pinched his ass, making him yelp. His fingers teased through my hair, making me groan as they scraped across my scalp. Jamie’s breaths became labored and the air thickened around us. “I’m going to put you down now and get these clothes off of you.” My mouth was dry at the thought of slowly peeling layer after layer off his delectable body.
The intensity in his eyes grew heated the longer he stared at me. He licked his lips and slowly slipped down my body. It took everything in me to bite back the groan that wanted to escape as he pressed against my aching cock. Our height difference had never been more apparent as I bent down and captured his lips with mine. They were as pillowy soft as I remembered, and when his tongue teased across my bottom lip, pulses of electricity flowed through me. I felt his touch flow through every inch of my clothed body.
“Dillon.” He moaned as his tongue wrapped around mine. My hands cupped his face, thumbs wiping away a combination of water and sauce as I backed him up against the wall. My heart hammered in my chest, trying to reach out to him. I lost myself to the sensations his lips and tongue forced upon me, the feel of his small lithe body against mine. I slipped my leg between his and pulled him closer as he rolled his hips against me. The tantalizing brush of his hard length against mine turned me feral.
I traced my fingers over his face, mapping his features as my lips continued to devour him. I took and took, but I needed more—it’d never be enough. I kissed my way across his jaw, used my hand to angle his head backward, and sunk my teeth into his sensitive lobe. His answering groan was all the encouragement I needed to know he was as lost to the moment as I was.
With my thundering heart beating loud enough to be heard above the sound of the pounding water, I licked, sucked, and nibbled my way down the delicate skin of his neck. I sucked on his fluttering pulse as my blood turned to liquid fire. “More,” he breathed as his cold fingers slipped underneath my drenched top.
Frustration and need had a growl tearing its way up my throat at not being close enough to him. I needed his skin on mine. It was the only balm to the ever-present guilt threatening to drown me. I shook it off and leaned back, wrenching my lips from his soft skin. Jamie’s head tipped back, his hungry gaze mirroring my own and echoed in my soul. I reached behind me, pulled my hoodie off, and threw it across the cubicle, shivering when the water hit my overheated skin. I groaned at the intensity of the moment and licked my lips when my eyes caught on the purple bruise blooming on his neck. I’d marked him, claimed him as mine, and the evidence of it stoked the lust-fueled inferno raging inside me.
“Your turn,” I rumbled as I worked his ruined top up his torso. I wanted to lick and suck on every inch of his alabaster skin that was revealed to me. It had been too long since I’d worshiped him. His top landed with a thud somewhere behind me, and we were drawn back together with a magnetic force that refused our separation. I would go to war for this feeling.
“Dillon,” he ground out when we snapped back together. The contact elicited a full-body shudder to roll through him as my lips traced his collar bones. “Yesss.” The hissed sound spurred me on as I sucked his hard nipple into my mouth, laving it until he writhed beneath me. His fingers dug into my back and shoulders, struggling to find purchase thanks to our slick skin. “More,” he demanded.
More I would give him. He was intoxicating. One touch, one taste, set off a chain reaction in me that wouldn’t be satisfied until I’d had every part of him. I sucked a path of bruises across his chest, then pulled his other nipple into my mouth as my hands trailed a feather-light touch down his side as he mewled, whined and whimpered. I undid the button of his pants and worked the zipper down. The teeth fought against me as I pulled the hard nub through my teeth, making him shout my name. He was so loud, if anyone was in the corridor, they’d have heard him.
I chuckled against his skin, goosebumps spreading in my wake as I licked my way down his abdomen. His muscles flexed under my ministrations as I dropped to my knees. I looked up at him from my prone position, and a feeling of rightness flooded through me. My little crow deserved the best of everything, and I was going to show him with my actions since words failed me.
Jamie nodded his assent to my unasked question as my fingers curled around his pants and I yanked them down. “Fuck!” I growled at the vision of his hard cock pushing against the cup of a lacey black jock. I kissed a path up the inside of his thigh, and when my nose brushed his thick length, his breath hitched into a garbled moan that had my cock throbbing with need. I ignored it. This was about him, not me. I never wanted to be a selfish lover where he was concerned.
“You smell so good, baby.” I buried my face in his groin and inhaled his musky caramel scent. It was dark and decadent, and my mouth watered with the need to taste him. “Up,” I said, slipping his soaked shoes off his feet so I could rip his pants off his legs. My hands shook as I worked them up the back of his legs and sunk my fingers into the perfect globes of his ass. It was full and firm and would look fucking amazing with my cock disappearing between its lush cheeks.
“Turn around. I need to taste you.” Jamie’s cheeks flushed, and he licked his lips. I ran my nose along his solid length and mouthed his leaking tip through the fine material. His deep moan echoed around us, only heightening our arousal. His dick jerked against the side of my face as he slowly turned and planted his hands against the wall, his golden curls clinging to his flushed face as he glanced over his shoulder. He bit down on his full bottom lip and pushed his ass out towards me like the fucking offering it was.
Jamie might look like an angel, but he was ruled by his desire. His dark pupils blotted out his usual pale-blue eyes and replaced them with lust-filled pools of darkness that I wanted to drown in. I ran my hands up the back of his trembling legs and trailed my thumbs along the cleft of his cheeks. I pulled him closer and bit down into his supple flesh. Jamie threw his head back and thrust his ass in my face.
I pushed his legs apart and settled between them. I nipped and sucked at his sensitive skin until he begged me to eat him out. “D-Dillon… Dil… please.” He groaned as I teased my finger over his taint and between his cheeks. His hole fluttered under my touch, making me smile into his skin. “Ahh, please. Dil…”
A flush worked its way up his shivering skin as I pulled his cheeks apart, licking my lips at the sight. His tight pink hole made my mouth water. He was fucking perfect. I teased my fingertip around the rim. He was smooth, with not a hair in sight. I leaned into him, breathing in his musky scent before spitting on his entrance and working it around with my finger.
My cock pulsed against the zipper of my jeans, the bite of pain pushing me higher. I could come from looking at his perfect pink hole and soon, I’d paint it with my cum. I pulled myself out and groaned as the tepid air hit my engorged length. I gave myself a few light strokes as I tried to decide if I wanted to keep teasing him or eat him out like it was my last meal.
Impatient and needy, Jamie thrust his hips backward and begged. And fuck, it was a high I’d never known. I might have been the one on my knees, but he was in control. I was his slave; the sinner who would make the golden angel fall.
“Fuck! Please, Dillon. T-touch me. I… I can’t take it…n-need to come.” Taking pity on him, I released my steel length and buried my head between his cheeks, kissing his puckered hole. I nipped and sucked at his skin and flicked the tip of my tongue around his rim, pushing him further and further into lustful delirium. “D-Dil…p-please.”
“With pleasure,” I growled and reached forward to tug on his heavy balls.
“Fuck, yes.” It seemed my angelic boy liked a bit of pain with his pleasure. “Ahhhh. Please. Yes!”
The first lash of my tongue against his tiny hole made me feel things, things I had no right feeling. It stirred a primal need inside me to mark him. Claim him. Own him. To fuck him and coat his insides with my seed and then plug him up so I was in him always.
Jamie cried out and cursed with every tantalizing lick I gave his entrance, his body strung tight as it thundered toward oblivion. His musky taste spread across my tongue, and my heart swelled ten times too big for my chest. I knew this was where I wanted to be. He was it for me, and as that realization sunk in, my eyes stung with the overwhelming emotions.
I wanted to possess him and keep him, but I knew I was on borrowed time. I might be his—had always been his even if he’d never known it. But if I was being brutally honest with myself, I knew I couldn’t keep him. When he found out I’d deceived him, he wouldn’t be able to look at me, let alone touch me or even want me. He’d hate me as much as I’d hated him. But little by little, he’d chipped away at the pain I’d buried beneath my hate until nothing existed but him. I feared he’d look at me and all he’d see was a monster, not the person he thought he loved. The person who would always be his. The other half of his soul.
The tight ring of muscle softened as I teased it with long hard strokes and light teasing flicks. I worked my finger around it in tandem with my tongue, the dual sensations more drugging then the next.
“Dillon!”
I chuckled as he sunk his hand into my hair and rode my face. I stiffened my tongue and pushed inside him as he thrust back into me.
“Fuck! Yes!” Jamie bellowed as I entered him for the first time. His walls clenched around me, muscles pulsing with need. His intense flavor saturated every part of me, and I felt like I was flying high, untethered by his pleasure. Fuck! Jamie rode my tongue like he was created to, his rhythm hard and fast as I sucked and slurped against him before working my finger in.
Jamie threw his head and shouted as he squeezed the living daylights out of me. He arched his back, the view nothing short of pornographic as water sluiced down the gully of his spine and collected in the dimples at the base of his back.
“Fuck. You taste like heaven, little crow,” I cooed as I fucked two fingers into his greedy hole. “I can’t wait to feel your walls squeeze my cock to death.” His answering moan was everything I’d dreamed of. “But right now, I want you to come on my tongue.”
“Yesss.”
“Fuck yourself on my tongue, baby. Imagine it’s my cock and come on my face before I paint my release on your back.”
“I-I’m close, D—” I stole his voice as I sunk my tongue back into his tight wet heat. I slipped my hand between his legs, and his walls tightened to the point of breaking my fingers. He screamed my name as his release consumed him. My hand cupped his pulsing length, and his hot cum seeped through the lacy material. I groaned into him as his body locked up tight, his taste intensified as he convulsed, pleasure stealing him away. I continued to wring his orgasm out of him until he went slack and collapsed back into me.
He slipped down the wall, flushed red, panting, and looking utterly fucked out. His eyes were glazed, and his mouth was a perfect little O. He collapsed against me, his eyes fluttering as he slowly came back into his body.
“Welcome back, beautiful.” I leaned in and kissed him. The gentle brush of lips turned feral as he devoured my mouth and moaned when he tasted himself on me like it was manna from heaven.
I pulled back, breaking our life-affirming kiss when dark spots danced across my vision, and my lungs screamed. Hauling myself up on my knees, my release barreled down my spine, electrifying every nerve in my body. One stroke, two, then the world went dark as my orgasm consumed my body and soul. It was like I was watching from outside my body as the first rope of my cum landed on his glistening face. Jamie opened his mouth as I continued to work my length in tight hard stokes, imagining I was coming deep inside him as I painted his face and mouth with my seed.
He licked his face, chasing the cum that dripped down his features before the water washed it off like it was his last meal. My spent dick gave an appreciative twitch, but I was out for the count. “Wow,” I breathed against his lips before I licked into his mouth. Our combined taste sent me back to heaven as I wrapped my arms around him.
“Fuck, that was…”
“Yeah,” I agreed and got to my feet, pulling him up with me. I locked my knees so we didn’t land in a boneless heap on the shower floor. “Now that I’ve made you into a filthy little whore, I need to clean you up. Then, I’m going to wrap you in my clothes and put you to bed.” Jamie whimpered against my lips, and I kissed him into submission. What I wouldn’t give for it to be my bed he slept in.
Soon, I promised myself. Soon. My little crow would be mine in every way. Even if it killed me, I’d make him mine.