Chapter 31
Chapter Thirty-One
Rhett
Brynlee sits on the couch as I walk out carrying three boxes and a bag. Her eyes widen when she sees me. “This is too much, Rhett.”
“There’s more, actually. I didn’t want to overwhelm you. You have to open the shorter box first, otherwise the rest won’t make much sense,” I say and sit next to her.
She looks apprehensive, and I’ve never had so much anxiety giving a gift to anyone in my life. But the moment she opens the box, her hesitation turns into confusion. “You made me a scrapbook?”
“Technically, Mom made you the scrapbook because I have zero artistic talent. But I got everythin’ she put in it.”
A curious smile appears as she opens it, and I breathe a small sigh of relief. “What is this?”
“It’s a collection of information and pictures of your family.
You said you want to learn about your grandparents.
I started talkin’ to people, and I got stories about them.
Them and your pops. Then I went to Fox Trot Valley and asked around about your mom and her family.
Those are in there, too, because I didn’t think you knew too much about them. ”
Her hands turn the pages gingerly, and her lip quivers. She’s never looked more beautiful. “You put a picture of me winning Miss Ohio in here?”
“That was, um, a picture your pops sent Dr. Mackle. They were friends, and I was pretty sure you didn’t know he kept tabs on you. He was proud of you. I have another book of things he sent Mackle for you to look at, too.”
She looks up with glistening eyes. “This is the most thoughtful thing anyone’s ever done for me. This had to take so much time.”
“I had a lot of time on my hands,” I say. “And I wanted to make sure you had all of this regardless of whether you stayed here or not. Everyone should know about their family.”
“Rhett, I don’t know what to say.”
Thank God! She likes it! “Hold that thought and open the big box. Be careful, though. It’s breakable.”
Her hands shake, and she opens it. “China?”
“It was your Grandma Kathleen’s. It’s not valuable, but it’s been in her family for at least four generations that I could find. I’m sorry I couldn’t find more information on her side. Her family passed away young.”
“Where did you get this?” she asks with a gasp and lifts a piece to examine it in the light. It’s an off-white plate with intricate gold designs on it.
“Let’s circle back to that after you open the rest.”
Brynlee shakes her head but smiles widely as she unwraps a small jewelry box. “Pearls?”
“They’re the first expensive present Jensen gave Kathleen once they turned a profit on the farm.”
“What?”
“Now, open the bag.”
Gently removing the tissue paper, she pulls out a large quilt. “Are these baby clothes?”
“It was a quilt your great-grandma made after Jensen’s twin passed away when he was only two. She wanted to keep a memory of him always.”
She holds it tightly against her chest as she turns to me. “My grandpa was a twin?”
I nod, thrilled she’s happy. “He was. Jensen and Josiah. Josiah got sick as a toddler, and he didn’t make it.”
“That’s so sad,” she says. “Where’d you find the quilt?”
“Pop got a list of the items from your grandfather’s estate sale from the lawyer, and Mom got the quilt from Mrs. Avery from down the way. Mom and I worked to get the things that we thought would hold the most sentimental value for you. And many were happy to give them to us.”
“There’s more?”
Smiling, I stand and hold out my hand for her. We walk out to the garage, and I flip on the light. She gapes at the wooden rocking horse I simply put a bow on. “Your great-grandpa built this for your dad when he was born.”
“You’re kidding,” she says, bending down to run her hand along it. “It’s beautiful.”
“Come on,” I say, leading her back into the house, giddy to show her everything else. “That one was impossible to wrap.”
“I believe that,” she says, and I love the lightness in her voice.
I show her three more bags in the extra bedroom. “Okay, I got kind of tired of wrappin’, so I took the easy way out.”
Laughing, Brynlee shakes her head. “You didn’t have to wrap them at all. Well, maybe the china. A box is probably best. Can I pick any one?”
“Whichever one speaks to you.”
She looks like, well, a kid on Christmas, and my breath hitches as I picture her sitting next to me as we watch our kids open presents like she is now.
It punches me in the gut because we were headed in that direction before I messed everything up, but I know I’ll do whatever it takes to make it a reality.
“A recipe box?” Brynlee looks up at me before opening it. “Are these my grandma’s?”
“Kathleen’s best friend’s daughter had them. It wasn’t part of the estate sale, but when I reached out to get stories about Kathleen, she gave them to me. She’s over in Silver Spring, and she would love to talk to you about your grandma.”
Her fingers flip through the cards, and she swallows before looking up at me again. “My handwriting looks like hers.”
“It does.”
“I don’t know how that works because I barely remember her,” she says and opens another bag. “More blankets?”
“Baby blankets. Kathleen made them. I figured you might want them if you decide to have kids one day. Or seventeen.”
I expect her to laugh, but she just smiles. Hearing her tell me she wants kids with me one day would be the best, but she just moves to open the third bag instead.
“Is this a jewelry box?”
“Your great-grandpa made it for Kathleen for her twelfth birthday. He died just before her party in a farmin’ accident.”
Her hands slide over the intricate wood carvings on it. “This is beautiful.”
“You like them? The presents?”
“These are the greatest gifts anyone has ever given me. Thank you, Rhett. I don’t know how to explain how much these mean to me.”
I smile at her. “I think I know.”
Sighing, she stands and faces me. “I was worried when you said you had presents for me. That was always Kevin’s go-to apology.
Lavish gifts I doubt he even picked out himself, but these are special.
I can’t wait to read the scrapbook and learn about my family.
You gave me something I never thought I’d get. ”
“You can read it right now if you want to.”
She shakes her head. “I’m really tired. I haven’t slept well, and the plane ride and drive kind of did me in.”
“Oh, okay. I can bring everything to your place, if you want,” I say, my heart sinking. I’d hoped to spend more time with her. Or at least know where we stand.
Her nose crinkles. “I left in a hurry, and I didn’t throw anything out before I left. I’m kind of scared to know what my house smells like.”
“You can, uh, stay here. If you want.”
Brynlee locks eyes with me. “One condition.”
“Anythin’.”
“We just sleep. I’m so tired, Rhett, and I just want to finally rest.”
“Can I counter your condition?”
“You can, but I may not accept.”
I smile. “We can just sleep, but being this close to you and not kissin’ you is killin’ me. Can I kiss you?”
She gives me a small nod, and I need no other incentive. I cup her face as my lips touch hers, and weeks of pent-up need to feel her simply near me comes out all at once.
Her arms wrap around my waist as she presses herself against me, and she returns the kiss. She needs this as much as I do, and I never want to stop. I want to kiss her forever, but I know she needs sleep. And if I’m honest, I do, too.
When we finally pull apart, we both pant. “Well, that was unexpected,” Brynlee says.
“I didn’t mean to bite your lip,” I say, my hands still on her cheeks. “I’ve wanted to kiss you for a long time.”
“Me, too,” she admits.
Releasing her face, I take her hand and walk to the bedroom. “Do you want somethin’ to sleep in?”
“You kept Alice?”
I look to where she’s locked eyes, and I chuckle. “Alice?”
“That’s what I named the bear you won me.”
“Of course I kept her,” I say and run my hand over her hair. “She’s kept me company every night.”
Blinking, she avoids looking at me. “A shirt would be great.”
I pull one out of the dresser drawer for her and set it on the bed. “I’m goin’ to turn off the lights and lock up. Just open the door when you’re dressed.”
I leave and put everything away neatly before locking the door and turning off the lights. It doesn’t take long, and the door is open when I get back. Brynlee lies in my bed holding the bear, and I take a moment to memorize this.
“This is a first for us,” I say when she catches me watching her.
“What? Just sleeping in the same bed without sex?”
Pulling my sweater over my head, I toss it in the hamper before slipping off my jeans. “No, sleepin’ in my bed. We’ve never stayed here before.”
“It’s comfy.”
“Yours is more comfortable,” I say and climb in wearing only my boxers and T-shirt.
I reach out and turn out the lights, realizing she’s right. We’ve never just slept in the same bed before. Not without making love first. The frequency we had sex should have said something to me before. Someone who didn’t love me wouldn’t have wanted me like she did.
“Rhett?” Brynlee’s voice whispers into the darkness.
“Yeah?”
“Will you hold me?”
I smile even though she can’t see me. “Always.”
She curls up against me, and I wrap an arm around her as she uses my bicep as a pillow. The fruity scent of her hair mixed with her floral perfume both amps me up and calms me down at the same time. She’s here. Finally, here, and she’s in my arms.
“I missed this,” she whispers.
“Me, too.”
“I have a confession to make.”
My heart races as my mind thinks of all the possible scenarios that may crush me. “What’s that?”
“When I was in Chicago, I thought I might be pregnant.”
“What?”
I sound alarmed. It’s not alarm, though. It’s hope. Nothing would make me happier than hearing her tell me she’s pregnant.
“I’m not,” she says quickly.
Swallowing, I rub her arm. “That wasn’t panic, I promise. It’s weird, but I’m kind of disappointed you aren’t.”
“You are?”
“This probably falls under too fast like you talked about earlier, but I need you to know somethin’, Brynlee.
I want it all with you. Marriage and babies.
Even if you won’t let me give you seventeen of them,” I joke.
“But I love the idea of us with a couple of kids runnin’ around. You’ll make the best mother.”
Her fingers gently run over my hand curled on her shoulder. “Thinking I was pregnant made me realize I needed to come back and know for sure where we stood. Even if you were done and never wanted to see me again, I needed to know. I just had to be strong enough to see you.”
“Why did that make you realize that?”
“Because when the test came back negative, I was disappointed. I’d been so certain.
I couldn’t keep anything down for two weeks, and that’s partially why your mama said I need meat on my bones.
And when I took the test, I cried for two days.
Even if we weren’t together, I loved the idea of having your baby.
That’s why I had to know for sure. I just didn’t know how to do it until I got Lydia’s voicemail. ”
The darkness gives me the confidence to ask what I didn’t in the light. “Is it past tense, Brynlee?”
“Is what past tense?”
“Your love for me. Is it still there, or is it somethin’ I have to earn again?”
“No, it’s very much still here. It’s why I’m scared to open up to you again. You really hurt me, Rhett, and it’s so much worse because I never thought you’d do that. I felt like I was dying.”
Her words stab at me, and the tears appear again. “I wish I could take it all back,” I whisper. “I would give anythin’ to take it back. I’m so sorry. So, so sorry.”
The tears fall against my will, and I hate it. Willing them to stop does nothing, and the last thing I need is Brynlee here when I fall apart.
“Rhett?”
“Yeah?”
Turning to face me, she reaches up and touches my face to wipe away the tears. “It’s okay.”
“No, it’s not. It’ll never be okay, but I’m goin’ to do everythin’ I can to make it up to you. I promise, I will. If you can give me another chance, I won’t blow it. I’ll show you that you mean everythin’ to me, and you’re more enough. You’re everythin’.”
She wraps her arms around my neck, and I burrow my face against her shoulder, no longer trying to hold everything back. Her fingers massage my scalp, and she softly whispers, “Shh, it’s okay. It’s going to be okay.”
“Promise?”
“I promise.”