39. Conquer above all
Anxo
S ending a frustrated groan heavenward, I force my legs to keep moving. My lack of sleep in the past two weeks is rearing its ugly head these days. Not having my sweetheart to hold through the night has taken a significant toll on my health. The purple bags under my eyes are proof of that.
With every passing day, all my thoughts revolve around Nevaeh. Our memories together keep playing on repeat like a broken record, and each time, my pain returns with a vengeance when I remember how lost and numb she looked that day.
Now, my life is a never-ending cycle of loving her more than life but having to live it without her. The emptiness in my soul yearns to be with her. and my Divine keeps clawing at my insides because it’s my fault she’s not here.
After Grace forged a plan, I had to stand in front of the entire kingdom and announce that the Princess of Death was now a rouge. I had to publicly deny her right, her fate, and her connection to me.
The news caused an uproar. I watched angry, disappointed faces demanding me to take my decision back, and as happy as I was by the uproar, I didn’t miss the ripple of excitement that buzzed through the crowd.
Standing on that stage, I watched the traitors try to hide their glee. They silently relished the fact that Nevaeh didn't have the kingdom's protection anymore. Those reactions solidified my will to continue the charade, and when Grace asked if I was ready for the final step, I didn’t hesitate to pull the trigger.
Horseman Nakaya, Harvey, and I performed a discreet ritual that altered the original enchantment of all portals and barriers surrounding the realm. The ritual was to stop anyone with harmful intentions for the Horsemen from entering or leaving the realm.
We knew our plan went against every oath we'd taken, but it was necessary to protect the kingdom and our families from ones poisoned with treachery.
Exactly two nights after the declaration of my mate's departure, hundreds of soldiers marched to the portal in the middle of the night.
They were carrying enough weapons and manpower to destroy an entire realm, not just a princess. As much as that picture enraged me, I didn’t overlook the lengths they were willing to go to cause a single scratch on my mate’s beautiful body.
The Princess of Death has never not lived up to her title.
Our ruse worked smoother than I could've imagined, so when the first line of warriors tried to cross, the power rippling from the altered portals reduced them to ashes.
Once the traitors realized they'd been lured into a trap, they tried to run back, but a defensive wall of Tetrad kingdom's new army was waiting for them. Every single traitor was captured and led to the dungeons where they would stay until their punishment was decided.
For the first time in Horsemen history, the loyalists and elders came to a unanimous decision. No formal proceeding or public execution. Death was the elected punishment for anyone found guilty of treason. Even the families of those warriors turned their backs on them.
Hazel helped Khatri with the interrogations and learned about all the mythic nations who had pledged allegiance to the coven to destroy us. One visit to each kingdom and more than half of them turned on their tails and ran, leaving the coven to fend for itself .
It’s remarkable what a single visit from an out-of-control siren can achieve.
I was in the process of making contingency plans for the families who had lost their breadwinners after what happened when Khatri suddenly linked me and requested my immediate presence. His anxious tone had me pushing off my chair and rushing towards the dungeons at the ass crack of dawn.
Warriorhead Khatri has been of immense help in the past two weeks. Even when he has two kids and a mate to tend to, the man hasn’t once complained about the extra workload.
Stepping out of the shadows, I find the man pacing back and forth with a subtle limp. The tense vibe circling him tells me that whatever he found will result in another sleepless night for me.
“Why are you limping?”
“Apologies Horseman, I know it's early, but I figured you’d want me to inform you immediately.”
Being deflective at five in the morning should be a crime.
“The leg Khatri... I asked you why you're limping.”
When the man simply motions for me to follow him, I huff and walk behind him. Passing the dungeon gate, I nod at the warriors keeping guard before the door shuts behind me. The only sounds I hear now are prisoners complaining and crying.
Being surrounded by people who betrayed me has me sending out pleas to Fates that I can leave without my hands dripping with blood. Hazel needs to speed up punishing them before I lose my patience and do it myself.
Turning the corner, Khatri steps aside so I can see who he has shoved into our worst cell. Whoever it is, I can tell they’ve managed to piss him off, which is a hardship in itself because Khatri is always so zen .
A disbelieving grunt escapes me when I take two figures uncomfortably sitting on the long concrete bench in the middle of the cell. The sound snaps them out of their pity, and they immediately stand to dust their outrageously expensive clothes .
“You ungrateful child.” Anger rising in her eyes, she steps closer to the bars. “How dare you let these guards treat us like lowly delinquents. I am the Queen on Conquer for Fate’s sake. Get me out of this filthy cage, this instance, Anxo.”
The audacity is astonishing .
My parents are in a dungeon cell. A cell allotted explicitly to traitors who intended harm to the kingdom and my mate, yet they still think they can order me around.
The mysterious puppeteers are finally within reach. The ones who tipped off our enemies about our locations. The reason why every traitor babbles about being loyal to the ring, even when they were planning to assassinate my mate.
“Captured them a mile south of the cabin Princess is staying at. You can thank Grace for the gem of elixir she gave me before we left. It lowered his shield of fabricated reality long enough to give us a fair shot.”
Now I know where that limp came from.
My mother meets my stare without a hint of guilt or shame, and I have to bite my tongue before I say something that will stop her from giving me the answers I desperately want. But I can’t swallow the scoff filled with disgust for them.
It didn’t take me long to accept their betrayal because when it comes to my parents, I always expect to be disappointed.
“Get us out of here, son. Immediately.” My father orders me. On what ground, I have no idea.
Son . That word pinches at my nerves. Shaking free of their past betrayals, I remind myself I’m not here as their son. That boy died a long time ago; they made sure of that. Today, I’m standing in front of two traitors responsible for my family's pain and hurt, and all I want before I order their well-deserved punishment is to know the reason behind their heinous deception.
Looking into the eyes of the two people who I refuse to consider family any longer, I ask, “Why?”
Kiara has the audacity to look bewildered. Like she has no idea what I'm asking them .
“Your faithful followers failed. Time and time again, yet you never stopped trying. Why is hurting my mate so important that you are willing to cross every line, and sacrifice every moral?”
“What are you talking about, son… I would never—”
I cut off my father before he could spit out any more nonsense. “Lie, and I’ll leave you here to rot for eternity.”
Snarling, my mother leaves her husband behind to walk to the enchanted bars, but sure not to touch them.
Kiara Alarie . Always the one in charge .
I hate that I get that from her. The need to always be a step ahead, to make sure I’m capable of anything and everything if need be. The only difference between us is that while every awful thing I’ve done was for my family and my people, she plays with lives and ruins people for sport. She serves no one but herself.
My father— Luke —grabs his mate to pull her back. I'm afraid he will convince Kiara to keep her wits when Khatri decides to goad her.
“I think there's a misunderstanding Horseman. I don't think they did it. Think about it for a minute, what are the chances a retired Horseman and a has-been Queen would willingly go against the Princess of Death ?”
Luke's head snaps to his mate whose eyes are burning with rage as Khatri keeps on adding adjectives to subtly insult them.
“I mean look at her, she’s obviously not smart enough for a coup or stupid enough to go after Nevaeh, right?”
“I'm not smart enough? I've been picking up the slack of all those useless devotees, and you think I'm not smart enough?” Pointing at Khatri, Kiara finally loses grip on her anger.
Pacing back and forth, she pulls on her hair in frustration. Luke tries to hold back his mate but she's started mumbling, a sign I clearly remember means she's not in control of her emotions anymore.
“I've been planning for years... years! And that girl ruined everything.” Kiara stabs at my heart with her finger, “You have no idea how difficult it was, but I sneaked that witch past Dean's defenses the first time.”
No, no, no. No way.
There’s no way my mother did that.
I was expecting her to be cruel and hurl out loathing curses for me and my mate, but in her incensed madness, Kiara has revealed her biggest sin.
My veins turn to ice and freeze in place, just like my father, who fails to stop his mate from saying too much.
“I planned the perfect place, the precise time Dean won’t be around, I did everything right! But what did that incompetent bitch do? She let those two just stroll out of there! Visha ruined years of plotting and still had the nerve to beg for my help.”
She was the one.
The one who caused my mate and brother to suffer in that dungeon for a decade. She kept them away from their families in a place where they were beaten to the inch of death for years. She caused that. My own mother. A woman so heartless she didn't hesitate before sending two kids to their deaths, and for what?
From the corner of my eye, I see Khatri tense before he lunges at the cell, and I barely stop him from ripping apart the bars and burning himself to ashes.
My body fills with dread, and one thought keeps running in my head over and over again. How will I ever face Nevaeh knowing my mother is the cause of her every nightmare?
“Why?” My voice is void of any emotion.
Whatever little love I had for them, whatever respect I couldn’t shake because, in the end, they were my parents, evaporated into thin air with her confession.
The nights I stayed up with my mate when her nightmares wouldn’t let her sleep, the times August couldn’t tolerate being away from me because he was afraid of being hunted down plays in my head on a vicious loop.
I breathe through the pain when I remember the night Harvey broke down in front of me after finding out about his parents. I remember promising Dean I'll get his daughter back before he died of heartbreak.
She did that. They did all that.
Their choices have been haunting my family for years. To think they did these horrible things and planned these elaborate schemes to hurt their oath family disgusts me.
“How. Could. You?” I seethe.
“Because it was supposed to be ours! It was our idea to combine the kingdoms! The Tetrad kingdom was my baby , and they took it! It wasn’t supposed to be four dynasties pretending to be one in front of the world. I wanted all four of the kingdoms ruled by one. Conquer above all .”
My sperm donor exclaims as if anything he said would ever justify his actions. The way he thinks of his kingdom as his baby grates on my nerves.
I’m a testament to how he treated his actual baby.
“You didn’t even want the throne. You forced a teenager to take over your responsibilities because you were too busy roaming around the world,” Khatri growls from beside me.
For the first time, I regret that they weren’t around much. Maybe then, I would’ve seen their true colors sooner.
The woman I am ashamed to call my mother chuckles manically, “That’s where you’re wrong. We were busy destroying the other Horsemen one by one. Once they were all out of the way, we were ready to take what was rightfully ours.”
I’m speechless by her logic. They are admitting to doing everything a leader takes an oath not to do.
“Oh, don’t look so glum, son, you can have it all after us. The Tetrad kingdom is yours... At least it was before you walked in with that abomination and called her your mate.”
I can’t control it anymore. I throw my head back and start laughing my head off. Khatri has to keep me steady with his arm around my shoulder when I'm about to fall to my knees because I'm laughing that hard.
After weeks of nothing but stress and grief, a burst of genuine amusement fills me because everything they just said is... absolutely stupid .
Their logic is flawed, their intentions are malicious, and their so-called hard work to destroy their kingdom is revolting.
Sobering up, I'm in utter disbelief to see they are still waiting for me to get them out of the cell. After what was just revealed they deserve to rot in here.
“You ruined my kingdom from within, but I have faith in myself that I can mend it again. You were treacherous to the throne, and I could try to be lenient and order a quick death as a thank you for birthing me.” With every word out of my mouth, I watch their hope shred to pieces. “ But you hurt my mate . You destroyed her childhood. You’re the reason for her nightmares.”
I tuck my hands in my pockets when I’m triggered to use them and take a step back. “I will never forgive you for what you did to my family.”
Turning to the new sets of footsteps, I watch Harvey and Hazel stomp toward the cell with anger and disgust rolling off of them. “I can’t touch you because I don’t want that weighing on my conscience, but I know some people who will happily take turns.”
Every prisoner in the dungeon goes still. Shocked that their previous leader and his Queen are about to be treated exactly like traitors should be.
When the soul twins enter the cell, I turn my back on my parents and don’t look back. “Keep them alive. There's a father desperate for revenge, and we can’t deny him his right.”
Walking away from the dungeon, I feel the weight of my responsibilities slowly slips off my shoulders. Yes, it took us more time to flush out the silent enemies than I expected, but in the end, the kingdom is once again a safe home for my mate and kid.
Now, I can finally go and beg her for forgiveness.
By the time I reach the Horseman castle, warm rays of sunshine are peaking through the blanket of dark clouds that had swallowed the realm whole since the day my mate left. It's as if every part of this realm was trying to complain about Nevaeh not being here in their own way.
I’m rearranging my office while thinking of ways to make it up to my mate when the door bangs open. I’m getting tired of patching the dents on my wall because my family doesn’t understand the concept of knocking—or how to open a door like a normal person.
“Okay, I have good news and bad news, which one do you want first.” Hazel slumps in the chair before my desk, brushing her wet hair behind her shoulders.
I can see she came straight here after cleaning the blood on her that belonged to my folks.
Stop. Don’t dwell on that, Anxo.
I collapse in my chair too, drained from yet another night of work with no rest. “Good news, please. I want to hear at least one thing is going according to plan.”
“Your folks will need more than plastic surgery to fix their faces.”
Who’s going to tell her the difference between good news and good news for her ?
“Now the bad news: the warriors posted on the portal that leads to the dragon realm caught a warlock trying to pass through. The fact that he didn’t turn to ash on entry doesn’t raise much of an alarm, but it’s an issue anyway. He’s sitting in Khatri’s office as we speak.”
Groaning, I throw my head back and curse my luck. It’s Okay. My grand apology will have to wait another day.
Forgive me for wasting another day, sweetheart.
Before I can stand, Harvey pushes me back into my chair. When did he walk in, and how did I not notice him walk behind me?
I’m losing my marbles.
“Sit your ass back down.” Hazel is suddenly inches from my face. “The only place you’re going is to apologize and beg that glittery mini reaper to come back. The next time I see your stupid face, and you’re alone, I will carve your skin and wear it like a jacket, Anxo.”
I gulp audibly and swallow my protests, at the sight of the menacing gleam in her eyes.
I have so many unstable people in my family , I can start a psych ward.
“We can handle whatever the witch is here for.”
“Technically, he’s a warlock—” Grace walks in, and quickly shuts up when Hazel shifts her glare to her, “but let’s call him a witch.”
Hazel takes over ordering and making plans on my behalf since I’m dead on my feet and way too emotionally compromised to worry about little details.
I feel unbelievably foolish for not involving them in my chaos sooner. Maybe I could've avoided some of the hurt I put on my sweetheart.
“Not happening. I’m not going anywhere with him,” Grace shakes her head profusely.
“Darling—”
Stuffing her fingers in her ears, Grace stomps out of the room. She was kind enough to forgive Hazel and me, but Harvey is a different story. She allowed him back inside their room last week, but the poor guy is still sleeping on the couch.
I think Grace is more terrified of losing her sister than angry at what we did, and letting Harvey comfort her right now would mean losing the anger and anxiety that’s been keeping her from completely falling apart.
Before I can apologize for the hundredth time, Harvey stops me. “Not your fault, brother. It was my decision; hence, I deserve the consequences. Stop worrying about us, and just get our two troublemakers back. Anyway, I have a brilliant plan to melt Grace. I will be more than forgiven before you're back.”
Seiji snorts at the confidence, “Yeah, right. Do tell what's this brilliant plan of yours.”
“Books.”
“Books? That's your plan? To give her a damn book? Fates, men are useless. ”
“Not a book. I'm not that stupid. Books . Like an entire library. I'm building Grace the biggest library in all realms and getting first editions of all her favorite ones.”
Like Nevaeh would say- holy fucking shitballs .
Harvey smirks to himself, seeing the stunned looks on our faces before sauntering out to finish his apology mission.
Shaking off my nerves, I stride to the door myself to plan my perfect apology, but before I can cross the threshold, my feet freeze in place.
When I turn around, Seiji is waiting with his arms crossed, like he knew I would stop.
“I just—what if she doesn’t want to come back? What if I ruined us beyond repair?” Saying it out loud makes the dread in my stomach crawl to my throat.
I deserve this after the hurt I’ve caused, even if the reason behind it was their safety. I know Nevaeh will understand, but that doesn’t mean it will lessen the pain she went through because of me. Any punishment she decides will be worth it, as long as I get a second chance.
“Oh, she’ll come back. Just explain everything. T horoughly . I bet the paranoia princess thinks you made her leave because you don’t love her anymore, so make sure she knows you do.”
I don’t think I’ve ever heard Hazel give advice.
And good advice? That’s new.
Before I can comment on the rarity, Hazel continues, “And don't forget to mention it was a once-in-lifetime stupidity thing.”
More good advice with a sprinkle of insult.
Is she sick?
Making a list in my head, I’m ready to run out. But then I stop again. Hazel calls me a wuss, and I'm glad because now I know I don't have to check her for a fever.
“I… uh, I just want to thank you guys… for not giving up on me.”
“That’s what families do. We stick together.” Seiji smiles.
“No matter the fuckups,” Hazel adds.