14. Aurora
I t’s midnight and I can’t sleep, not after the weekend I just had.
I always thought, when I finally had a breakthrough with one of the guys, that I’d feel euphoric, overwhelmed at the fact that it was happening, but all I feel is confused.
This is not how it was supposed to go. Griffin kissed me, he actually kissed me and I kissed him back, it was amazing.
Which is what I should be focused on, how great that kiss was, but all I can think about is Everest smashing his fist into his face.
He hit him, he hit Griffin, his best friend, and I know it’s my fault, but I never thought my confession would lead to this mess.
I turn onto my side and scrunch my eyes closed, attempting to block the bloody images of them brawling from my mind, but it’s no use.
Then I hear a commotion in the hall that has my eyes snapping toward my door.
It’s late and a week night, no one should be out there, but then I hear another dull sound, before there are three sharp bangs on my door.
Who the hell is that?
Snatching my covers up, I try to calm my racing heart, telling myself that whoever it is will go away in a second, but then there are two more heavy thuds.
“Rora, it’s me, let me in,” a familiar voice yells through the door, and I am tossing my duvet aside and rushing across the room before he even finishes speaking.
When I throw open the door, Everest is half-standing, half-leaning on the frame, almost falling into my room as I greet him. “Ever? What the hell are you doing?” I whisper shout, quickly looking up and down the hallway, making sure he hasn’t disturbed anyone.
“Needed to see you,” he grunts, swaying on his feet. “Who the fuck is sending you chocolates?” he adds, bending down to snatch them off my doormat, as my panicked stare takes in the gold and red box.
Fuck.
They’re from him . The gift to go with my latest letter, but I can’t tell Everest that. I can’t tell anyone that.
“I don’t know, they probably got the wrong room,” I quickly lie, snatching them from him and tossing them into the bin beside my door.
“Sure they’re not from Griffin?” he snaps, forcing himself back against the frame and eyeing me in question, and it’s only then I smell the alcohol on his breath.
“Are you drunk?” I ask, assessing him more closely now, and he scoffs, pushing past me and into my room, but that’s enough to give me my answer.
Closing the door behind us, I watch him stumble into the center of the room and survey the boxes still closed on the spare bed.
“Why haven’t you unpacked yet?” he asks, once again almost falling as he turns toward me, and I move over to him and force him to take a seat on my bed.
“Please don’t say you’re leaving.” The pain in those last words threaten to make my chest explode, but I’m still so mad at him.
“I haven’t exactly felt welcome. That makes unpacking a little tricky,” I snap, and he sighs, dropping his head against my stomach, his hands gripping my hips.
“I’m an asshole,” he grumbles, and I stroke the back of his head the way I used to when we were kids.
“Yeah, you are.”
When he pushes back I take a seat beside him on my bed, following his stare to where it now rests on the picture on my nightstand.
It’s of the four of us at a pool party from a couple of summers ago, before everything changed, when I still believed it could change for the better. I was so fucking stupid.
“You were mad at us that day. That dick, Jason, and his friend, Kyle, were both hitting on you, and we threw them in the pool,” he muses, and my nose wrinkles at the mention of Jason Miles.
“You had that butterfly clip in your hair, and that gold bikini on that had every guy at that party fucking staring at you. You’d matched it to your nails with the little gold flowers, and all I wanted to do was cover you up, but then I wouldn’t have been able to look at you myself. ”
I sit dumbfounded at his confession, and all I can think to say is, “You remember how I had my nails?”
His drunken eyes flick back to mine. “I remember everything, Aurora.”
I shouldn’t be surprised, but still it sends flutters through the pit of my stomach.
“Why are you here, Ever?” I ask again, and he shrugs.
“Didn’t want to go home,” he admits, flopping back onto my bed, and I sigh, laying down beside him. We stay like that for so long that I almost think he’s fallen asleep until he mumbles, “Why did you do it, Rora? Why did you ruin everything?”
I turn on my side to look at him, and whisper, “I didn’t.”
Everest does the same, reaching out and brushing back a piece of my hair. “You’re not supposed to be theirs, you’re supposed to be mine,” he admits, eyes almost closing, as sleep comes to claim him.
“Why can’t both be true?” I dare to ask for the first time, and he shakes his head, as his eyes flutter even more.
“Because you’re too fucking good for that,” he whimpers, curling closer to me in a way he’d never do sober, and I can’t help but allow it. “Why did you have to kiss him when you belong to me?” It’s the last thing he says before he falls asleep completely.
The next morning I wake up to him wrapped around me.
His legs are twisted with mine, and his head is tucked into the space between my chin and shoulder.
It’s a moment I wish I could stay in forever, but my morning alarm blares through the room and startles him awake.
His eyes cringe beneath the sunlight pouring into my room, as they flick around and assess where he is.
I know the moment he realizes, because he shoves himself away from me like I am one of his regrettable conquests.
“What the fuck am I doing here?” he grunts, staring me down with nothing but accusation, and I sigh, as I toss the covers aside and get up and move away from him.
Asshole Everest is back.
“Good morning to you too, brother, you’re welcome for letting your drunk ass stay here after you came knocking on my door in the middle of the night,” I snap, ensuring my words are laced in sarcasm, as I storm toward my door and rip it open, gesturing for him to leave.
Everest only rolls his eyes as he climbs off my bed.
“Whatever, I’m out of here.” He strides toward me, his eyes lingering on me for only a half a second before he’s out of the door.
I move to slam it, when his hand snaps out and forces it back open.
“Stay away from him, Rora,” he adds in a dark tone, and I laugh.
“Stay away from who?” I ask, with an innocent smile, and it only makes his stare deadlier.
“Don’t fucking push me, Aurora,” he grits, his fingers flexing around the wood of my door, before he releases it and strides down the hallway.
His words linger in the air and anger explodes out of me. “You don’t fucking own me, Everest,” I yell down the hall, no longer caring about waking anybody up, and he freezes mid-stride, snapping back around to look at me.
“You own me,” he shouts back before he’s stalking down the hall toward me.
I stumble into my room as he reenters and slams the door behind him.
“My entire existence fucking revolves around you, you’re fucking in me,” he roars, smacking his chest with a balled fist, forcing me backwards until I hit a wall.
“Do you think I like this? Do you think I want this torment? That I want to fight with my best friends?” he adds, his words entangled with hate and regret.
“I’d give anything not to feel like this, to have you without fucking ruining everything, but I can’t. ”
It’s the most honest I’ve ever heard him in my entire life, and for a moment I am stunned into silence.
I see it now, I see it all, it’s clear as day in his eyes as he looks at me, and I don’t know how I missed it.
He wants this, he wants me, but he’s never let himself admit it, and I know why, and it isn’t because of his friends, it’s because of us, because of who we are.
“Ever,” I whisper in understanding, inching closer to him.
“Don’t you see, it’s already ruined, it’s happened, there is no going back, we can’t put the worms back into the can,” I explain gently, and he starts to shake his head.
“It’s ruined, I’m not theirs and I’m not yours, but I could be,” I add, and he reaches out instantly and catches my throat with his hand, giving it a warning squeeze.
“Stop saying shit like that,” he warns, pushing me back against the wall, and I feel his arousal digging into me. “Do you have any idea what it does when you deny me? I’m fucking aching for you.”
“Then take me,” I snap, not dancing along this blurred line between us anymore. “We can’t go back, not when we both know what we want, but I can’t just be yours,” I start to explain, when his thumb comes up and across my lips, silencing me.
“Does this mouth do anything else but fucking piss me off?” he asks, forcing his thumb into it and bending it around my teeth to press onto my tongue.
I have no choice but to close my lips around it and suck, as he eyes me eagerly.
“On your knees,” he adds, using his grip on my mouth to start pushing me down, but the tone of his voice already has my knees buckling in submission.
“Such a good girl,” he breathes, pulling back his thumb and swiping my spit all across my mouth.
“Now, I’m going to fuck him out of your mouth, and you’re going to take it, aren’t you? ”
Arousal burns through me like lightning, and all I can do is nod, as I watch him unbuckle his pants and free his erection. “Oh fuck,” I pant, watching in fascination as a bead of precum leaks from his tip, before his hand strokes up and his thumb swipes it away.
His cock is thick and long, and if I weren’t so turned on, my brain might short circuit about how I’m going to fit my mouth around it, but I’m too far gone for that.
I watch him jerk himself roughly, my mouth watering at the sight of him, before he taps his crown against my lips and my mouth opens on instinct, making him groan.
My tongue flicks out against his head, pulling a sharp hiss from between his teeth, and that’s all the encouragement I need to lean forward and suck him into my mouth.
There is definitely no going back now.
“Suck me,” he commands, and I obey him instantly, gently taking more of him into my mouth, as he squeezes his base.
“Come on, Rora, suck me deep into this pretty mouth,” he begs, and his words have me taking more of him, swirling my tongue around his crown and relishing in his taste as it explodes on my tongue.
“Is this okay?” I ask, making his eyes darken as I pair my words with the sucking of his head.
“I said suck, not talk,” he snaps, fisting my hair and tilting my head until he can guide me deeper onto his length.
“Come on, little sister, show me how good you are at sucking your brother’s cock.
” His words are filthy, but for some reason they light me up inside.
We both know this is wrong, but that’s part of the reason it feels so good.
I hollow my cheeks and take him deeper, letting my tongue work his underside, as I reach up and take over jerking his base.
“Oh fuck, that’s it,” he groans, watching me fiercely as I move my mouth up and down his shaft until it’s drenched in my spit.
His fingers flex at the base of my skull, his hand gripping my hair so tightly that it burns, but it’s nothing compared to the look in his eyes as he watches me.
His hips roll, shoving his cock a little deeper, as his eyes assess how far I can go, how far he can push me, and the answer is: not far enough.
We’ve always done this, existed in the gray of this black and white world, pushed limits and crossed boundaries, and he was right, this will ruin us for good.
There will be no hiding from our feelings anymore, but instead of feeling scared, I feel motivated.
I suck him harder, take him deeper, savoring the deep rumble that rips from the back of his throat, as his hand snaps out to the wall. His entire body hoards over me, his hips starting to move at a punishing pace, as he ruts into my mouth, hitting the back of my throat until I gag.
“Fuck,” he moans, fucking my mouth with quick snaps of his hips. “Gag on me like that again, little sister, and you’ll be choking on my fucking cum,” he gasps, shoving himself a little more forcefully against my tongue, and it feels fucking magical.
He fucks my mouth at a brutal pace, not gentle, not caring, yet still filled with so much yearning that it makes me want to black out from the heavy weight of him on my tongue, after wanting it for so long.
There is no right or wrong, no one telling us to stop, just me and him, and the moment we burned it all down.
He hits the back of my throat again and I gag once more, my throat closing around him, and I feel his entire body tense.
The hand gripping my hair tightens to the point of almost ripping it out, but it’s nothing compared to how roughly he thrusts between my lips, as his salty release splashes against my tongue.
It’s an unfamiliar but welcome taste, as I suck every drop from him, but before I can swallow, he drops to his knees and collars my throat once more.
“Show me, Aurora, I want to see my mark on your tongue,” he commands, and I open my mouth so he can see the white liquid pooling there, making him groan.
Then his lips are on mine, his tongue forcing its way into my mouth and lapping at his own release, until we’re a mess of mouths at war.
Only once he’s licked up every drop of himself does he pull away, a dark and possessive look in his eyes, as he pants, “Considering I don’t own you, you sure taste like mine, little sister. ”
Then he releases me, rising to his feet and tucking himself away, tossing me a wink before walking out of my dorm without another word.
It’s only once he’s gone do I realize what he just did.
Everest Monroe just claimed me.
Fuck.