Chapter 18
Chapter Eighteen
Out of breath from hurrying, I climbed the last few feet of the path that led me to an elevated clearing in the trail.
Eli paced at the top, angrily talking into his satellite phone. As soon as he saw me, he dropped it to the side and ran to me.
“Calla, thank God.”
I met him halfway and flung my arms around him, breathing in his scent and relishing how it felt to fit so perfectly into his chest. When I pulled back, the crease in Eli’s forehead softened.
“That was a nice greeting.” He kissed the top of my head, and I burrowed into him more.
“How long were you waiting for me?”
“Oh, not long at all,” he said casually. “Definitely haven’t been waiting here for an hour, panicking and visualizing every possible worst-case scenario. I knew you’d be here any minute.”
I let go, but his hands still lingered on my waist. “Sorry, I made one wrong turn at the last clue, or I would have been here sooner. ”
“Nah, it’s fine.” He shook his head, his curls flopping with the movement. “I wasn’t worried at all. I knew you’d make it.”
I lifted a brow. “Were you on the satellite phone just now?”
He raked his fingers through his hair. “Well, I just wanted to tell them you weren’t here and we should maybe go looking for you. But this entire crew is worthless” —he turned to the cameraman who stood ten feet from us— “no offense, of course. Shay just told me you were still within finishing time and they wouldn’t even tell me your GPS location.”
I laughed and swatted his chest. “Eli, that phone is for emergencies.”
He shrugged sheepishly. “I’ve been waiting for a while. It felt like an emergency.”
Rising on my tiptoes, I stole a kiss. He seemed surprised for a moment before he wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed me back.
“As much as I’d love to stay here and do exactly that for hours,” he said when he broke away. “We should probably find our camp.”
Eli and I made quick work of the last clue before following the path to the final red X. He held my hand loosely while we walked. It felt natural—my hand in his and taking in this adventure together.
Maybe I still didn’t have all the answers. He could break my heart as soon as we got out of here. Maybe we’d talk for a few weeks until it fizzled out into nothing. Maybe we wouldn’t talk at all. But the careful way he led me through those woods told me that wasn’t likely.
Whatever we might become, I’d never regret going all-in on how I felt right now.
Any daylight had long since departed as Eli and I cozied up next to each other on an oversized camping chair in front of a roaring fire.
After we arrived at camp, cameramen pulled us for interviews before we were finally rid of our cameras and microphones and left completely alone.
Meals had been provided for us, so Eli heated ours over the fire after getting it started. We ate next to the warm flames and talked about any little thing that popped into our heads.
“I hope you know this in no way can be construed as camping,” he said after hours had gone by and we were staring up into the starry night sky.
“What do you mean?” I teased, as I tugged the soft, fuzzy blanket closer to my chin. “We’re outside. There’s a tent. A fire.”
“We didn’t even pitch the tent ourselves, and there’s a mattress inside.”
I glanced back to the large tent. The door flap had been drawn open, revealing a plush mattress with close to a dozen pillows inside.
“I mean, there isn’t even a bedframe,” I pointed out.
He cracked a smile at that. “You’re right. We’re truly roughing it.”
“And you said I wasn’t outdoorsy.”
His body shook lightly with laughter. “I’m just glad you survived the hike today. I almost sent out a search party.”
I paused for a moment, letting my head fall heavy on his shoulder. “I lied earlier,” I admitted.
“About what?” Eli leaned forward, straining himself to look at me in the dim light. He appeared almost queasy.
“Nothing bad,” I added quickly. “Just about getting turned around. I mean, I did, but that’s not why I took so long.”
His brow knit together as he waited for me to continue .
“I came across this view when I went the wrong way and I had to stop for a little while just to take it all in. Being out there alone made me think about a lot of things.”
Eli traced circles on my wrist, listening intently. “Like what?”
“About our conversation yesterday. How I told you I felt too guilty to move on. I’ve been putting my life on hold because it felt unfair to Michael. He was the one who was always so alive and full of energy, not me. If anyone deserved to get everything out of life, it was him.”
Eli kissed the top of my head. “You deserve everything, Calla.”
His conviction touched me more than he’d ever know. “I think I’m finally starting to realize that. A lot of it is thanks to you.”
“Don’t go giving me too much credit.”
I swallowed, nervous for what I wanted to say next. “You make me excited about the future.”
He blinked slowly. “I know you’re scared of this—of us—but I am too,” he said. “I don’t think I’ve ever had someone in my life I couldn’t imagine losing...until you.”
Happiness erupted in my chest.
“You really think we could be something after this?” I asked, staring at our intertwined hands.
His sharp laugh unleashed a flurry of unease within me.
“We sure as hell better be something after this. I’m not leaving here without you; I hope you know that.”
Relief flooded through my entire body at his proclamation. He felt the same way I did. Eli Price actually wanted to be with me. For real. Not just in this hypothetical reality we currently resided in.
“I’ve fallen completely head over heels for you. I’m sorry if that freaks you out, but it’s the truth,” he continued, chin resting on my head. I could hear the vulnerability in his voice. “I hope it doesn’t freak you out, though.”
“It did,” I admitted. “But only because I feel the same way.”
“Come here,” Eli said, grabbing my hand.
My stomach flipped as he pulled me onto his lap. Settling in, I couldn’t ignore the hot, tingly sensation that had permeated my entire body. He felt it too. I knew he did by the way his arms tightened around me.
Eli placed a tentative hand on my hip and I leaned against his chest, wrapping an arm around his neck and bringing my other hand up to touch his cheek. A week ago, I never would have thought that this position would bring me more comfort than I’d felt in years.
“I really don’t deserve you,” he murmured. “You’re so perfect.”
I scoffed. “Are you joking? I’m anything but. I’m literally only here because my sister couldn’t watch me waste away anymore.”
“And I’m only here because I have a shitty reputation and my dad finally got fed up. That doesn’t change the fact that you’re amazing. Way too good for me, but I’m secretly hoping you don’t realize that.”
“Hey,” I scolded. “You’ve been amazing to me the entire time we’ve been here. You’ve supported me. You’ve listened to me. And you’ve never treated me like I was some charity case or that I was too fragile. You saw something in me from the beginning.”
Eli flinched just barely. “You’re giving me way too much credit,” he whispered, sighing heavily, yet not loosening his grip.
“Stop that.” I pointed a finger at him. “You seriously have no idea how much you’ve done for me. I love how protective you are, but you still always push me to do things even when I think I can’t. I love how, whenever I share things about myself, you actually listen. And instead of getting uncomfortable with the heavy stuff, you always try to think of what to say that might resonate with me. I’m excited to know you out of here. To travel with you—God, I’ve never met anyone I wanted to travel with before. And I can’t wait to share my writing with you and to read yours. I haven’t been excited about that in a long time.”
His jaw clenched as he let my words wash over him.
“Maybe you were the last person I thought I could fall for, but I’m so glad I did. You’re so much more than some stupid reputation. You’re smart. You’re genuine. Your eyes light up when you’re excited and they get vulnerable whenever you share something real with me. I’m so happy I met you, Eli.”
The fire danced in the reflection of his eyes as he looked at me intensely. “Calla, you have no idea how happy I am that I met you.”
With that I crushed my mouth to his. His lips were warm and soft, and he immediately let me take control. My fingers found his hair and I pulled him toward me, wanting to be as close to him as possible. He groaned and kissed me back, his hand running up my leg leaving a trail of sparks in its wake.
Eli’s warm fingers found their way under the hem of my thick fleece, caressing my waist, and I gasped with desire. It had been a long time since I’d felt this way. We broke the kiss, breathless. He rested his forehead against mine.
“I’ve never wanted anyone the way I want you,” he panted.
My body shuddered.
“I mean it, Calla. I can’t stop thinking about you. About what we could become outside of here. ”
I pulled back so I could look into his eyes, so sincere and filled with longing.
“You’re beautiful,” he continued. “Inside and out.”
“Stop,” I said.
“No, I’m serious.”
I kissed him again. “You’re just as beautiful inside and out,” I murmured against his lips.
He held me tighter and kissed me harder. His hand continued to roam over my waist and I pressed my breasts against his chest. My need for his touch was becoming more feral by the minute. Now that I felt fully ready to move on, I wanted this. Bad. One could only be a celibate recluse for so long before starting to go a little mad with want.
Eli’s kisses became greedier as I lost the little self-control I still possessed. I wanted to make out with him. I wanted to touch him all over. I wanted to rip all our clothes off and give him every part of me.
I could feel Eli straining against his pants, and I shifted so I could straddle him. His hands slid down my sides and then around to my ass where he pulled me closer to him, pressing our bodies together. He was so hard now, and my entire body ached to feel him.
“God, Eli, I need you,” I moaned, and he immediately grabbed the hem of my fleece, pulling it up and revealing the flimsy sports bra underneath. Once it was off, he kissed down my neck and chest, making his way to my breast.
“I’ve thought about doing this for so long,” he whispered as he licked the thin fabric and teased my nipple with his tongue, sucking gently and sending a pulse between my legs.
“Eli.” His name came out as a moan.
He pulled back to look at me for a moment. I should have felt vulnerable in this position, half-undressed and longing written all over my face. But I could tell he was in this with me. I tried not to think about the vast difference in our experience levels as Eli shifted the fabric of my sports bra aside and took my bare breast in his mouth. The cold air against my skin made me shiver, but his mouth was so warm. So perfect.
His free hand slid up the outside of my thigh, coming dangerously close to the heat building between my legs.
Suddenly it dawned on me that we were still very much in the middle of the wilderness. I doubted anyone would come across us, but some sort of barrier would be appreciated.
“Tent?” I panted. The words had barely left my mouth before Eli stood up. He wrapped my legs around his waist and carried me by my ass to our tent. I let out a laugh as we toppled onto the soft mattress. He zipped the tent flap closed before moving back over me. His lips met mine and I grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled it off of him. It got stuck near his arm and he released my mouth to pull the rest of it off.
His rippling muscles flexed as he tossed the t-shirt aside. His skin was smooth and warm, and my hands immediately roamed up his sides and chest. “So that’s what you’ve been hiding under there.” I reached out to touch his perfectly sculpted chest but pulled my hand back at the last second.
Eli grinned before grabbing my hand and placing it over his heart. “You’re not getting shy on me all of a sudden, are you?”
“No,” I lied, thinking now about his amazing body and all of the likely equally-amazing bodies he’d been with before.
The corner of his lip tugged up. “I’m not sure where your mind went wandering, but can you please bring it back?”
“Maybe we can turn the lantern off,” I suggested.
His smile widened as he shook his head. “Do you know how badly I want to see you? There’s no way in hell I’m turning off that light. ”
Eli pressed his body against me, keeping his weight off me with his forearms. He touched our foreheads together.
“What’s wrong, Calla?”
I let out a frustrated sigh. “I just started thinking about how perfect you look right now. And then I thought—of course he looks perfect, he’s literally a movie star. And then I thought about all of the stunning women you’ve probably been with before?—”
“First of all, I’m hardly a movie star.” My words cut off as he placed a hand against my mouth. “And second, I can’t change my past. But I can tell you this is new for me too, okay? The fact is, I’ve never cared about someone like I do you. So, as vulnerable and bare as you’re feeling right now, know that I’m feeling the same.” He kissed my forehead. “And we don’t have to do anything, by the way. We have plenty of time for that. We can just talk, or sleep, or whatever you want. I’m not going anywhere. There’s no rush.”
His words melted away my insecurities. As soon as he pulled back his hand, I reached up and kissed him.
“Thank you,” I whispered. He kissed me back sweetly at first, but now that my worries had been relieved, my raw need slowly returned.
Eli shifted so that his body covered mine. I wrapped my legs around his waist, desperate to have him closer.
“Tell me what you want,” he whispered.
“You.”
A growl escaped his lips as he kissed my neck and reached between us, pulling at the waistband of my leggings. His hands were warm and firm as he slid them down my thighs. My stomach did a nervous flip. Eli had a way of making me feel like a completely new person. The type of person ready to dive headfirst into whatever this feeling was.
I pushed his sweats off, revealing a pair of gray boxer briefs that hugged him tightly. The thin material did nothing to hide his arousal. I bit my lip as I ran my hands over the smooth fabric.
He flinched and grabbed my hand. “I’m not going to last long if you start doing that.”
I smiled shyly, grateful I was having as powerful of an effect on him as he was having on me. Eli reached down to help me shimmy out of the rest of my clothing, his eyes drinking me in as we exposed more and more of my bare skin. He traced his fingers lightly down my stomach, stopping as they reached the delicate dip by my belly button. His eyes searched mine before he moved his hand lower.
I sucked in a breath as his fingers grazed my underwear, already wet and revealing how badly I wanted him to touch me. He slid his hand under the thin fabric until he could run his fingers along my slick folds. My body jerked beneath him, but his eyes never left mine. His expression was serious as his fingers circled, spreading my wetness. I gasped and my hips moved involuntarily, silently begging him to go further.
“Please, Eli,” I whimpered.
“Calla,” he groaned.
“I’m ready.”
“I need to hear you say it. That you’re really ready. For me.”
“Yes, Eli. Please.”
He kissed me, slowly and passionately. His fingers continued to tease my clit as his tongue explored my mouth. I gasped and held onto his arm when he slid a finger inside me.
“Are you okay?” he asked, watching my reaction carefully.
“Yes. Keep going.”
He pressed his forehead to mine, kissing me as his fingers worked slowly. My body reacted instinctively, my hips rising to meet his hand. He moved his hand with intention, and with each stroke in and out, a pressure started to build deep within me. A feeling I could barely remember. I moaned his name.
“Calla,” he murmured against my mouth.
“Faster, please,” I begged. He kissed my neck as his thumb grazed my clit, his fingers picking up speed. I gripped his arm, his shoulders, his neck—any part of him I could grab.
“I want to watch you fall apart,” he whispered.
My body was no longer listening to any commands I was trying to send. It was acting entirely on its own, responding only to the pleasure Eli was giving me. The pressure built and built, and as Eli kissed my neck and increased his pace, a wave crashed through me, taking over every nerve in my body.
I gasped, clutching his shoulders as Eli held me tightly, kissing my face and continuing to thrust until the wave dissipated.
I lay there panting as he stared down at me. Even though I had just completely come apart in his arms, I felt no trace of vulnerability. Probably because I could see my own raw emotion matched in his face. He dipped his head to press his lips lightly against mine. I wrapped myself around him, savoring how perfect this moment felt—and how much more of him I still wanted.
I tugged at his boxer briefs, but he stopped me.
“We don’t have to rush this,” he said, but his jaw ticked with restraint.
“Eli.” My voice was still shaky. “I haven’t felt this alive in years. I can’t remember the last time I wanted something so badly. I want all of you. Right now. In this moment. Everything is perfect.”
Eli kissed me, long and hard. His tongue caressed mine, his body pressing mine into the mattress. I could feel him pulsing, wanting, and waiting. I didn’t know if I’d ever want anything more than I wanted this right now .
I reached down again and tugged at his underwear, pulling them down his muscular thighs. My core clenched with anticipation as he leaned back to tear off the rest of the offending material. He practically ripped my underwear as he pulled them off me.
As he lowered himself back over me, I could feel his length pressing against me.
“Condom,” I whispered.
He sat up and looked around before grabbing a tray from the side of the bed. It was full of toiletries. He held up a package of condoms. “Seems the producers thought of everything,” he said quietly.
I didn’t hesitate. I ripped the box from his hands and tore it open. Eli’s expression suddenly turned wary.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
He looked pained. “Maybe. . . maybe we should wait.”
One look at his erection and the fact that he was physically restraining himself from me told me he wanted to wait even less than I did.
“I can’t think of anything worse right now than you not being inside me.”
He closed his eyes, and grunted, jaw clenched. “Fuck,” he muttered. “I want you so bad.”
Ripping a condom out of its wrapper, I rolled it onto his length. His eyes darkened as soon as I touched him. He didn’t stop me. When I finished, he crushed his lips to mine, positioning himself between my legs.
“Please, Eli,” I breathed against his lips.
“You’re sure?”
“More than anything.”
His gaze penetrated mine as he slid slowly inside me.
I gasped.
“Okay? ”
“God, yes.”
He let out a relieved chuckle before kissing me and burying himself further. It felt so good to be connected with him. To share this.
His eyes rolled back as he groaned. “Fuck. You feel so good.”
I ran my fingers through his hair, tugging on the ends and making him grunt. He rocked into me, slowly at first, each stroke making my body pulse with need.
“Eli,” I moaned. “Please. Harder.” I could already feel the pressure building again.
His mouth was on mine, kissing and sucking, and I could feel the intensity in his movements as he thrust deeper and faster.
He gripped the hair at the back of my neck, sending a wave of desire through me. I arched into him, desperate to have him closer. Every part of him. Our bodies moved together as we gave in to the raw, animalistic connection between us.
I couldn’t take it any longer. “Eli, please.”
He buried his face into my neck and thrust harder, gripping my hip.
“Calla.”
My name on his lips almost caused me to come completely undone. My body trembled, on the brink of another climax. I whimpered as I let myself completely give in to the feeling of him thrusting inside me.
He groaned and reached between us, rubbing my clit with his thumb, and that was all it took to send me over the edge a second time. I clutched him as the wave took over, the orgasm tearing through me and making my body spasm. Eli let out a string of expletives as his thrusts became uneven. His body shuddered as he came, holding himself deep inside me .
Eli collapsed on top of me, his weight pressing me into the mattress. Our chests heaved up and down.
“Christ,” he breathed.
My legs were weak and tired. “I know.”
Eli lifted his head to kiss me. “Was that…was that good for you?”
I laughed softly, taking in his earnest expression. “Do you even have to ask?”
He grinned. “Just wanted to make sure.”
We repositioned ourselves so that he could hold me, his arm wrapped around my shoulders and my head on his chest.
“I could never get sick of this,” he whispered.
My chest fluttered with excitement as I hoped with every fiber of my being that he meant it.