Chapter 27
Chapter Twenty-Seven
“And then he just left. Can you believe that?”
Piper nodded as I relayed to her everything that happened over our mother’s worn dining room table.
“Sounds like he’s sorry, honey,” my mom chimed in from the kitchen.
“He’s sorry because he got caught,” I pointed out.
Ever since I’d returned from the show, my mom had made it clear where she stood on the whole Eli situation. She firmly believed we were meant to be and had been nagging me to at least entertain giving him a second chance.
“It is interesting that he’s here making his movie without the backing of his dad’s production company.” Piper tapped her chin and leaned back in her chair.
“Probably felt too guilty to take the opportunity,” I said, pushing my salad around on my plate but not actually taking a bite.
“That’s good,” my mom insisted, bustling into the room with a pint of ice cream and three spoons. Her hair was piled on top of her head and she looked younger than her years, wearing a loose-fitting sweatshirt that I could’ve sworn she’d stolen from me.
“How is that good?” I demanded, swiping a spoon from her and popping the lid off of the mint chocolate chip.
“Because that means he’s showing remorse.”
“He should!” I exclaimed. “What he did was awful.”
“I don’t care what you say, sweets. That boy is in love with you. And you can play the hurt victim all you want, but you’re in love with him too.”
I gawked at my mother, once my most trusted ally. Now she’d betrayed me for a man she hadn’t even met.
“I can’t believe you’d say that to me. He hurt me. You’re supposed to be on my side.”
Piper shrugged. “She kind of has a point.”
“Oh my God, not you too.” I groaned and clutched the ice cream to my chest. They didn’t deserve any if they were going to go all intervention on me. “I’m sorry I didn’t find love on the show, but you can’t say that I didn’t grow. I’m leaps better than when I left. I moved. I get out of the house occasionally now. I’ve got half of my next book done.”
“And you’re struggling to finish the rest,” Piper added.
I glared at her. “When did I walk into a pile-on? I can’t believe you two want me to forget everything and just forgive Eli. And for what?” I looked around the table. “Just to get hurt again? Clearly, he isn’t ready for a relationship. No way. I’m much better off on my own.”
Piper got up and snatched the ice cream from my grasp. “Sounds like just another excuse not to put yourself out there again.”
“She’s right, Calla,” my mom said soothingly. “We aren’t claiming that Eli’s intentions were great at the beginning. And you have every right to be hurt and upset. But he followed you here. That has to count for something, right? ”
Her hopeful expression gave me pause and I sat straight up in my chair. “Wait a second. You wouldn’t happen to know anything about how he knew where I lived, would you?”
My mom’s guilty expression instantly gave everything away.
“He called you.” My shoulders sagged as I registered her disloyalty.
“He called me . He had my number from the show,” Piper said. “I just happened to be with mom when I got the call.”
“I can’t believe you two.” I stood up and started pacing the living room. Considering my mom’s eclectic taste for knickknacks, there was barely room for a few strides in each direction.
“Honey, he sounds so sorry.”
“Oh, did he? Did he sound sorry, Mom?” My mom looked sheepish, but Piper was unapologetic and kept her chin up.
“When was this?” I demanded.
“About a week ago.” Piper continued eating ice cream like she wasn’t hitting me with a huge betrayal. After signing me up for the show, I supposed I shouldn’t be surprised. Meddling appeared to be her new favorite hobby.
“I didn’t want to see him.” Groaning, I fell back into my mom’s ancient green sofa and let the cushions engulf me. Arguing with my sister was pointless when she was convinced she was in the right. Or when she was in the wrong, for that matter.
“You don’t want to see him because it’s hard. And it’s hard because you still have feelings for him,” Piper pointed out.
“And he was so sweet on the phone, Calla. You should have heard him. The way he talked about you made me so sure you could trust him.”
“I obviously can’t!”
I wanted to scream at how easily Eli had charmed my mother. She had been enamored with him ever since watching our story unfold on TV. When I got back, unlike Piper, she had begged me to watch it. To remember how good we were together. How I’d felt when I was with him.
I had refused. I would not subject myself to watching that. I had pretended to be disgusted by the idea of seeing him, but really, the thought just hurt too much.
My mother got up from the table and came to sit next to me on the couch. By the delicate way she touched my shoulder, I knew she was about to get emotional with me.
“Honey, it’s hard when tragedy comes at you at such a young age. I know you thought you had everything figured out with Michael. You loved him so much and you saw your whole life ahead of you. And it’s absolutely unthinkable what happened. It isn’t fair.”
She grabbed my hand out of my lap. “But you have to keep going. Keep living. I had been so worried about you. But watching you on the show...that was the first time I saw some of the light creep back into your eyes. Your face glowed every time Eli entered a room. I hadn’t seen you that excited in years. Even when you came back, I saw your broken heart, but it was still different. You weren’t so closed off anymore.
“Maybe I should hate Eli for what he did; for betraying your trust. But I can’t. He brought you back to life. I know you thought you’d be with Michael forever, but it’s time to start thinking about what the rest of your new life could look like.”
Guilt held a vice-like grip around my heart. I licked my lips and removed my hand from my mother’s grasp.
“I didn’t think I’d be with Michael forever. We...we were about to break up.” My voice was so soft I wasn’t even sure if she’d heard me.
After a few moments, the other side of the sofa sank down as Piper joined us. I looked between the two of them, surprised to find no traces of shock at all.
“What? Don’t tell me you knew. You couldn’t have. I never said a word. We were waiting to tell anyone until we had everything sorted out.”
“We didn’t know,” Piper said quickly. “It’s just...”
“You had been with him for so long,” my mom continued when Piper’s voice trailed off. “We loved him like family, and we knew you loved him too. But?—”
“But you hid behind him,” Piper blurted out. “You never put yourself out there. You spent all your time in your own head with your stories, and not actually experiencing anything new.”
“That’s not true,” I scoffed defensively, even though I knew it was. I had already come to the same conclusions myself. Michael had been a crutch that I had always leaned on just a little too heavily.
“We had no idea about the breakup,” my mom said, stroking my arm. “I just noticed you two drifting for a while, and I wondered.”
“Me too,” Piper whispered.
In the saddest way ever, I wanted to laugh. Here I had been desperate to keep the biggest shame of my life a secret, and they weren’t even surprised.
“I was so scared to tell you. After his accident, everyone rallied around me. I couldn’t admit it. I couldn’t tell everyone I had been about to break his h-heart.” A sob escaped on the last word as I finally got out everything I had been holding in the past two years.
My mom reached around me and tucked me into her side so my head could fall on her shoulder. Piper leaned over and rested her head on my arm so that I was cocooned between the two of them—the only two people in whom I had ever found true comfort.
Until recently.
“We all still would have rallied behind you, Calla. He was still a part of you. Losing him broke you all the same, no matter what the circumstances were.”
After a few more minutes of silence Piper finally spoke up. “Please go talk to Eli.”
At that moment my chest ached to do exactly that. But it wasn’t so simple. “It hurts too much,” I whispered.
“It’ll hurt more if you don’t.”
“Maybe you’ll find that you can’t forgive him,” my mom said. “But you owe it to yourself to try.”