Chapter 13 #2
Nantes turns to me. “You nailed it, then. You said he gave you a bad vibe.”
“Yeah.”
“What a chicken-shit way to die. He doesn’t have to face justice or deal with his issues. Mental illness is real, and a lot of people take that route who are truly struggling, but I’m fucking sick of white-collared losers doing shit like that instead of just facing what they did.”
“Me too. Sometimes I tell myself maybe they had some kind of epiphany before they died. It makes me feel better.”
“I’ll try that.” He shakes his head. “Fuck. If I hadn’t been with you, I might’ve hooked up with him. Gotta be more careful out there.”
“It’s true. I had a coworker get robbed blind by a hookup. He took her back to his place and they had great sex, according to him. He wakes up in the morning, she’s gone, and so is all his cash, his watch, his laptop, and a tablet.”
“Damn. She cleaned him out.”
“She did. He picked her up at a club, but clearly that was her plan all along. Either that, or she got inspired when she realized he had some nice things.”
“That’s why I don’t host. I like to meet up in places and avoid going to theirs too. If it’s just a hookup, there’s no reason to let someone know where you live. Even when I was in Madison, I was all about the bathroom, the alley, someone’s car. Never my place, rarely theirs.”
“Smart.” My chest tightens slightly listening to him, and fuck, I think it’s jealousy again. How do I still feel jealous after all these years? I was ridiculous in high school about his time and attention, and apparently, if given the opportunity, I still am.
“What?”
I turn to him. “What?”
“You made a weird noise.”
“Oh.” I drag my hand through my hair. “I think I’m jealous.”
He tilts his head. “Of what?”
“Men you’ve been with.” I huff a laugh. “Dumb, I know. Until last night I didn’t even know I was into you that way. Or maybe I always have been. I was weird when we were younger too. I hated it when you spent time with people besides me.”
Nantes smiles, reaching out to rub my arm. “You haven’t analyzed it yet, Doctor?”
“I didn’t know I needed to. Guess it was a blind spot.”
“I’m not gonna lie, it’s pretty flattering.”
“Not creepy?”
“Not from you, Van.” He steps closer, putting his hands on my chest. “Earlier you said you like to dominate a little bit. Did you mean that?”
I nod, gazing into his eyes. “Yep.”
“Like, how much?”
“As much as my partner lets me. I like restraints, mostly.”
His tongue flicks out to wet his lips and my cock swells slightly. “I’ve never really let anyone, because it’s always casual, you know?”
I nod. “But you want to?”
“Yes.” His cheeks turn bright red as soon as the word is out of his mouth. “I considered going to a club, but I chickened out. I didn’t want to do things like that with a stranger, you know? But my… my, um…”
“You can tell me anything, Nan. You can trust me.”
“I know.” He clears his throat. “It’s my biggest fantasy. It gets me off the most.”
“Being dominated?”
“Used,” he whispers, digging his fingertips into my flesh slightly. “Helpless.”
“Fuck. That’s so hot. You never have been?”
“Closest I got was today.”
I wrap my arm around his waist and pull him close, making his breath catch. “You want me to dominate you, Nan? Use you? Make you beg for me?”
He nods, releasing a shaky breath. “I trust you.”
There’s nothing sexier, in my opinion. “I’d love to. We can explore together. See what feels good for both of us.”
Swallowing hard, Nantes drags his hands down my chest. “I have so many fantasies involving you.”
“I never had a clue, but I’m glad I do now.” I grip his chin. “You’ll tell me all of them, and if you’re good for me, I’ll make them all come true.”
He whimpers, nodding as his eyelids flutter. “I’ll be good.”
Fuck me. I had no idea I could feel this way about Nantes, or any man, but right now I want to strip him down and fuck him senseless. My cock jerks violently at the thought, so I grab his hand and rub it against my bulge.
“Just so you know, I’m legit turned on.”
“Fuck,” he whispers.
“Tell me the dirtiest fantasy. Right now. Tell me.”
He shivers in my arms, gazing up at me with the prettiest, neediest look on his face. “I don’t top often. I prefer bottoming.”
I nod. “Go on.”
“But I love the idea of a very dominant man asking me to fuck him. The idea that he trusts me enough, wants me enough, to give that part of himself to me is heady.”
“You want to fuck me?”
He sucks in a breath. “I’m so turned on right now I might pass out.”
“Don’t do that.” I brush my thumb across his cheek. “You want to see me bend over and beg for your cock? That is, after I’ve spent days taking everything I want from you?”
“Oh my god, you’re good at this.”
Grinning, I slip my thumb into his mouth and he sucks it. “I’m inspired. I think we’re gonna have fun together, Nantes.”
“Whatever you want. Seriously, Van. Anything.”
“So good for me.” I press my lips to his and he gasps, opening his mouth and clinging to me. Damn, he’s passionate.
We stumble backward until my legs hit the coffee table and we almost fall over. I stabilize us, and we dissolve into laughter.
Before I can say anything, there’s a knock at the door. He exhales slowly, then yells, “Come in.”
The door opens and Deo and Balt enter. Deo smiles. “Hey, guys. We came to see if you want to grab dinner with us. We’re going to our favorite sushi place downtown.”
Nantes gives me an inquisitive look and I nod. It’d be good for us to spend time with his family. We can always get back to what we were doing later.
“Yeah,” Nantes says. “Let me change.”
He walks off, but I notice the way Deo is checking us both out. Balt, for his part, seems disinterested, but then again, he’s generally stoic from what I’ve seen so far.
“Happy to be back in town?” Deo asks.
“Very happy. Your family has always felt more like home to me than my own.”
“I’m sure Nantes is happy. He missed you, even if he won’t admit it.”
“I missed him too.”
More than I even realized.