Chapter 6
I like to refer to myself as a free spirit because it sounds better than ‘out of control.’
— Shayne to Ande
SHAYNE
1 year later
It took her twelve months to die.
The stubborn, beautiful, best Nonna in the world suffered greatly every day before that, too, defying all odds that had been set against her.
Each day felt like a piece of my soul had left my body.
“ Sing .”
I looked down at my Nonna’s face, so pale and so utterly at peace with herself.
“ What do you want me to sing?” I asked her.
This was our thing.
We sang.
From the first memory I had of the two of us, that’s what we did.
We sang her favorite songs, and as I grew up, mine.
We’d call each other, and we’d sing.
Hell , there were a few times we’d even roped in Quinn and Costas .
Quinn could actually carry a tune.
Costas was a lost cause.
“ You know what.” She smiled. Or tried to.
She didn’t have the strength to do that anymore.
I sang “ Hey Jude ” for her, then “ Sugar , Sugar . ”
Somewhere in between the lyrics of “ Sugar , Sugar ,” her hand went limp in mine.
I watched avidly for her chest to raise, and it didn’t.
A knot formed in my throat, and I choked out my last song, meant only for her.
“ You Raise Me Up .”
The moment the lyrics were finished, my brother’s voice sounded from the doorway.
“ Is she…”
“ She is,” I confirmed, voice hoarse.
“ I’ll call the nurse.” he whispered, walking to me and pulling me in for a tight, fast hug before letting go.
I didn’t let go of her hand until the nurse arrived and asked me to give her some room.
Well , she didn’t ask, but it was clear that she needed the space to work.
I gave it to her, and wondered idly what my next steps were.
Ultimately , I decided that no one needed to know.
No one but the hospice nurse who’d pronounced her dead, my brother, and me.
My parents didn’t need to know, and we wouldn’t be telling them.
They’d made their choice when they’d taken off and had no plans to come back.
I couldn’t even tell Ande or Quinn .
Granted , Ande would want to know, but she had her own shit to deal with right now, thanks to some awful things going on in her life, and I didn’t want her family thinking that I brought her into my own personal hell.
Quinn ?
Well , I wouldn’t tell Quinn because I knew he wouldn’t come.
This wasn’t the same as Addison’s funeral.
No , this was my Nonna . And to come to this funeral, he would have to see my brother, and that was the last thing I wanted to deal with.
On one hand, he might show up, and then I’d have to deal with Costas and him in the same room. On the other hand, he might not show up, and that would only break what little was left of my heart.
“ What are your thoughts on a funeral?” I asked my brother.
The Justice of the Peace was called over an hour ago and had yet to arrive.
“ I think we should just embalm her and bury her,” he admitted. “ I don’t really have the spare cash to pop out a seven-thousand-dollar funeral.”
I didn’t either.
Not after paying for all of this out of pocket the last six months.
What savings I had was all but gone.
I hadn’t been working, either, leaving me with practically nothing to my name.
I did have a couple of jobs lined up. One at Angel Flight right in the middle of Dallas , flying helicopters for the flight medic service here. And one, surprisingly, with Keene’s brother-in-law, Winston .
The two men had formed a sort of black ops team that handled the rescuing of sex trafficked children.
It was a worthy cause that I’d been more than happy to sign on for.
I’d already gone on two such missions as we’d helped save three children from the clutches of sick and depraved men. However , Nonna had taken a turn for the worse lately, and I’d slightly backed off of anything that would take me away from her for more than a couple of hours.
Costas , on the other hand, probably had plenty of money. He just didn’t want to waste it on this, the tight wad.
Then again, maybe I didn’t want his dirty money paying for my Nonna’s funeral.
Nonna hated that he was in the gang.
She hated that he wasted his life away stealing and hurting people.
Even more, she already wouldn’t allow Costas to pay for her medical treatment. What would make me think she would want his money for her funeral arrangements?
“ I think we’ll do that,” I said quietly, watching my Nonna’s body, half expecting to see her chest rise and fall.
It didn’t.
It took the Justice of the Peace twenty more minutes to get there, but eventually he did, and I was surprised to see that it was one of Quinn’s friends from school, Fletcher Daniels .
“ Fletch ,” I said upon seeing him, a small smile gracing my mouth. “ I didn’t know you’d moved back.”
As soon as he’d graduated college, he’d moved to Georgetown to pursue his degree, and I hadn’t realized he’d come back to Dallas .
“ Been back a few years now,” he said. “ Been busy, though.” He flicked his hand at his badge.
“ I imagine,” I mused. “ My grandmother is inside.”
“ I’m sorry,” he said as he followed me in. “ She was on hospice?”
The nurse took over then, explaining everything.
Five minutes later, Nonna was officially pronounced dead, and the funeral home was called to take her body.
“ If you’re curious about a more direct route,” Fletch said when he saw me wincing at the funeral home’s pricing. “ You can go direct to the crematorium.”
I looked at him in surprise. “ We can?”
“ Grandma didn’t want to be burned,” Costas interrupted.
I shot him a glare. “ Grandma also wouldn’t want to put me into financial debt because I couldn’t afford to pay for her burial costs.”
Fletch handed me a card and I took it.
“ Thank you,” I said quietly.
“ They’ll hook you up,” he said. “ And do it for a fraction of the price, while also cutting out the middleman.”
Then he left, and I saw him pulling out his phone almost immediately.
Turning away from the front door that was closing on his back, I turned to my brother.
“ We have to do something,” I said. “ And I just called three homes. They all want over four grand to do this, and it’s not even holding a funeral, Cos .”
Costas turned away. “ It’s not what she wanted.”
I clenched my hands and said, “ We can’t always get what we want, can we?”
I hadn’t meant it to come out sounding so malicious, but he just made me so freakin’ mad!
The man was so damn stubborn, and once he got it in his head that he was right, there was no changing his mind.
“ I know this.” He threw up his hands, fuming. “ But this is one thing we can at least give her.”
“ Then how will we pay for it, Costas ?” I asked him bluntly. “ She didn’t want your blood money to pay for her expenses. As you know. And I have,” I pulled out my phone and scanned my banking app. “ Exactly nine hundred dollars left in my savings.”
Costas’s teeth clenched.
He knew, just as well as I did, how our grandmother felt about everything he did. She was not impressed with how he lived his life. She loved her grandboy like no one else could, faults and all. But she still let him know, up until she couldn’t speak anymore, that he needed to turn his life around.
To do that, he’d have to leave the gang. Which he wasn’t ready to do yet.
“ Honey ,” Costas started, but I couldn’t take it anymore.
I was just so, officially, done.
“ No ,” I said before he could continue. “ I’m not doing this with you. I’ve done a lot of sacrificing over my life, but I’m done. We’re going to do the cremation thing. I have enough to do that.”
Costas’s jaw clenched.
“ Well , how the fuck’re we gonna get her there?” he snapped.
I didn’t know.
Someone might get suspicious about seeing a body bag in my car and start asking questions.
“ Let me call the place and ask,” I snapped as I stormed outside.
And , of course, that was when I nearly ran into some of his sheep. One that looked incredibly familiar.
Not even the hair dye and the contacts could hide a Carter face from me.
I knew the Carters better than they knew themselves—at least two of them, anyway.
I knew that jaw. That hair line. The stance.
All Carter .
Gable caught sight of me from where he was standing in the back of the group and flared his eyes at me.
I quickly looked away, knowing exactly why he was there.
I knew he was undercover. I just never expected him to be undercover when dealing with my dumbass brother who needed a reality check.
Maybe this was his wake up call…
I pushed past them all, phone already to my ear, and swallowed hard when the man on the other line answered. “ Yeah , my grandmother just passed away. I was hoping to talk to you about some options.”
When I looked back, not a single man was left outside, because they’d literally gone into my should-be sanctuary.
I gritted my teeth, angry all over again.
I hated them in my house!
Fuck my life.
If I had any money to my name right now, I’d be so gone.