Chapter Thirteen – Aurora #2
My hand went to my stomach in a silent attempt to calm the sudden nerves I felt.
I looked back up at Liam, and everything suddenly became so clear.
It had never been lost on me how handsome Liam was.
I had noticed in the past, but he wasn’t the only handsome guy I was friends with.
Yet, in this moment of looking at him, really looking, I saw more.
The dimple in his right chin. Had I ever seen that dimple before?
His deep brown eyes had a light golden ring around them that seemed to catch the sunlight and sparkle.
He had cut his hair shorter and buzzed the sides, giving him a boyish look.
Hope would have hated it cut that way. When we had first become friends, she had made it clear she liked Liam’s hair longer, rather than shorter.
She had told me once, with a laugh, that it had been a constant argument between them.
I quickly turned away and drew in a slow, deep breath.
My eyes caught my mother’s, and she winked.
Oh no. She’s going to leave me alone with him.
“I’ll leave the two of you alone to talk.”
Dammit, I knew it.
Reaching for her as she walked by, I said in a panicked voice, “No! That’s okay, Mom. You don’t have to leave.”
Liam cleared his throat once again. “Actually, Mrs. Banks, if you wouldn’t mind, I’d like to speak to Aurora alone.”
My head whipped to look at Liam. “Why?”
His face crossed with confusion before it relaxed. “We have a lot to clear up.”
I swallowed the lump in my throat. This was where he was going to tell me he didn’t want me to visit with Winnie anymore, that we couldn’t be friends any longer. So why was I panicking because I expected this?
Drawing in a deep breath, I slowly exhaled.
The soft click of the door my mother had gone through sounded like a gunshot in my ears. I was surprised I hadn’t flinched.
Turning away from Liam, I sat back down and looked out over my parents’ backyard.
They had a view of Moose Lake, and when I was little, I would lay in the hammock and dream of owning my own home and living on the lake.
As I grew older, the dream of owning a bookstore replaced the dream of having a house on the lake.
I envied Harper and Declan and the beautiful home they had on the lake.
That would have been my dream home when I was sixteen.
Liam took the seat my mother had vacated on the outdoor sofa.
We remained quiet for a few moments, both of us simply staring out at the lake.
What was he thinking? Why wasn’t he saying anything?
Should I go first? What should I say? Oh hey, Liam, I’m not trying to replace your dead wife, but at the same time, I would love to roll around in a bed with you.
I closed my eyes and pushed that image away. The heat of my cheeks caused me to place my palms over my cheeks.
“I need you to know I didn’t tell Kim about that day. She read it in my journal.”
Turning, I stared at him. “She read it in your journal?”
He nodded. “And what I wrote was not what she said to you. It was more of an admission as to why I said what I said.”
Confused, I shook my head. “I don’t know what you mean.”
Liam drew in a deep breath and exhaled. “I did write about how Hope had become jealous of you in the end, and that she had complained to me that you were trying to replace her.”
“Lia—”
He held up a hand. “I know you weren’t doing that, Aurora. You don’t have to defend yourself once again. We both agreed to leave it in the past.”
“Why didn’t you tell me at the coffee shop that she had read it?”
“I didn’t work it out in my head at the time. I couldn’t believe what she was saying when she mentioned it on the phone the day I called her about the stuffed animal. She claimed I drank too much and had confided in her.”
My eyes went wide. “You knew she knew, yet you didn’t tell me anything? You let her blindside me at the bookshop, Liam.”
He closed his eyes and exhaled. “I know. I didn’t want to believe that I would have done that.
I mean, I knew deep in my heart I didn’t tell her, I just couldn’t figure out how in the hell she knew.
Plus, that day I had decided to let her go, I just needed a couple of days to work it all out.
I never dreamed she would go straight to you and lie. About everything.”
I turned my head away from him and looked out over the horizon. “How did you find out how she found out?”
“At the coffee shop, when you said that Kim said we slept together that night I told her. I knew that was a load of shit because I fell asleep on the sofa that night and woke fully clothed.”
I turned away. “That’s none of my business, Liam.”
“It is, Aurora. Kim tried to drag you into something because she wanted to rekindle something with me, and she lied to push you away.”
“Why would she want to push me away?” I asked, then instantly regretted my question. If everyone else around me could see I had feelings for Liam, Kim probably had as well.
“Because she read about my feelings for you and she wanted you out of the picture,” he said in an almost whisper.
“Wait! Your feelings for me? Do you mean our friendship?”
Liam simply stared at me, but didn’t answer my question. It was a stupid question. Of course he meant our friendship.
My head was swimming. Kim had been jealous of our friendship.
“I’m sorry, please go on,” I softly said.
Liam opened his mouth then quickly shut it. He closed his eyes and let out a long breath before he spoke again.
“Anyway, I remembered that Hope had bought this doll that she set on Winnie’s bookshelf. It was a nanny cam. She bought it to use on top of the baby monitor for whatever reason. I didn’t question a lot of what Hope did.”
Glancing at him, I frowned. Why did his voice sound so…cold?
“I asked Declan to watch the video with me.”
“Why?” I asked, genuinely confused by that.
Liam shrugged and let out a soft laugh. “I don’t know. No, that’s a lie, I do know. A part of me was worried I might see something…well…I just thought it would be a good idea to have someone else watch it with me. The fact that Declan is a cop was a plus.”
Afraid to ask but needing to know, I asked. “What did you find out?”
For the first time since he sat down, Liam looked at me. “That Kim is a lying bitch.”
My brows shot up.
“She took Perry the Moose from Winnie, purposely. He was in the hall closet behind all the winter blankets. She’s lucky she didn’t murder him like Declan said because I don’t know what I would have done.”
I couldn’t help but smile.
“She also put Hope’s picture in the side drawer while Winnie was sleeping. She wasn’t jumping on the bed, which I really couldn’t believe anyway. I’ve never seen Winnie jump on the bed, and I wouldn’t allow it for safety reasons.”
“Why would Kim do that?” I asked, confused.
His eyes searched my face, and a look of pain crossed it before he turned away and stared at the lake beyond. “Because she was the one who wanted to replace Hope—and you—in Winnie’s life, as well as my own.”
I glanced at my hands before gathering the strength to speak.
“I thought you still felt that way, and it about destroyed me, again.”
“Aurora, I never felt that way. I told you this.”
“Well,” I said with a laugh. “Imagine my surprise when your nanny tells me otherwise. I thought you spoke to her about it. That to me said you still felt that way. And the fact that she was an ex-girlfriend, it didn’t seem strange that you would confide in her.”
“I know,” he said with a shake of his head. “I know how that must have made you feel, but she lied.”
Facing him, I asked, “Have you always kept a journal?”
His cheeks turned a light shade of pink. “I started journaling before I met Hope. Most of it was ideas about The Muddled Moose, what I wanted to do with it. Nothing like a real journal. I was always writing in notebooks, so when we got married, Hope gave me the journal.”
I smiled. “I wouldn’t have pegged you for the journaling type of person.”
He laughed. “Yeah, neither did I until my therapist recommended it.”
“You saw a therapist?”
He nodded, but when he didn’t say anything more, I didn’t pressure him. Therapy was a very private thing for people, and I wasn’t about to intrude on why he had seen a therapist.
“When she told me on the phone that I had told her about the whole Hope and you thing, because I drank too much, I panicked. I knew I had fallen asleep that night and woke up on the sofa, and I guess a part of me worried that maybe I had said something to her, even though I knew in the depths of my soul I hadn’t.
I didn’t want to believe I would have done that to you. You’re my best friend, Aurora.”
It felt like a lead weight was dropped into my stomach. Liam was establishing the friend zone clear as day. I grinned and bumped his shoulder. “I thought Nathan was your best friend.”
He smiled. “I can have more than one best friend, you know. You’ve been there for me and my family, Aurora. The last thing I want to do is hurt you.”
I nodded and looked back out over the lake. The sun was starting to sink lower in the sky, causing shades of orange and pink to streak across the horizon. The reflection on the lake was breathtaking.
“You didn’t have to track me down today to tell me all this but thank you.”
“I did. I can’t stand the idea of you hurting because of me…again.”
I kept my gaze straight because if I turned to look at him, I knew he would be able to read my feelings. “Well, I’m glad you didn’t say anything to her. Thank you for that.”
“I fired her.”
That time, I did look at him. “I’m glad. I didn’t trust her, and she was…she wasn’t a good fit for Winnie.”
“No, she wasn’t, and I should have listened to my friends when they voiced their concerns.
I was just grateful to have found someone to watch her who somewhat fit Hope’s request, which I shouldn’t have listened to in the first place.
The worst part, she wasn’t even supposed to be one of the people we interviewed. ”
Surprised, I asked, “How was she even a candidate, then?”
“She got into the system at work when she saw my name and added another interview and didn’t put the name. No one noticed because they had already sent me the list, but what they didn’t know was that Kim sent the additional email saying there had been a last-minute add-on.”
I slowly shook my head. “Wow. What a disturbed person.”
He let out a humorless laugh. “Who I let get near my daughter.”
I reached for his hand and squeezed it. “You couldn’t have known, Liam.”
Closing his eyes, he shook his head. “I’m her father, and I should have kept someone like that away from her.”
“Well, she’s gone now.”
He let out a long breath. “Yes, she is.”
“Who is going to watch her now?”
“Mary.”
Surprised, I asked, “Mary? Is she returning from New York City until you find a nanny?”
He smiled. “Yes, she is returning to be Winnie’s nanny for good. It would have made Hope happy, since her wish was that Winnie not go to daycare or anything like that.”
I returned his smile. “That’s wonderful news. James will be glad to hear that.”
“James? James Quinn?” he asked. “Why would he be glad?”
Laughing, I shook my head. “I’m pretty sure they like one another and maybe there’s more to her moving back than just wanting to take care of Winnie, not that it isn’t reason enough.”
“Really?” he asked, surprise etching his voice. “I didn’t know that.”
His phone went off, and he pulled it out to read a text: “Jake and Opal are heading back to the house with Winnie.”
I stood. “I appreciate you taking the time to come over and tell me all that.”
Liam also stood, and I reached for his hand. “Wait, there is something else I need to talk to you about.”
A look passed over his face, but it was gone before I could read it. When I didn’t say anything, he asked, “What did you need to talk to me about?”
I opened my mouth to say it. To tell him I had deeper feelings for him than friendship, but I couldn’t make the words form. Instead, I took a few steps back and shook my head.
“Nothing. It’s nothing.”
He opened his mouth to speak but quickly closed it. He smiled instead and asked, “Would you like to come over for dinner tomorrow night? We can make homemade pizzas and see what crazy toppings Winnie puts on.”
Laughing, I nodded. “I would love that.”
“Great. Then I’ll see you tomorrow. Stop by anytime.”
He leaned down and kissed my cheek. And I knew it wasn’t my imagination that his lips lingered a bit longer than they should have before he stepped back, turned, and walked away.
I dropped back onto the sofa and stared out at the darkening sky.
“You are a coward, Aurora Banks. A freaking coward.”