Chapter 25 - Spencer
Chapter Twenty-Five - Spencer
A mixture of fury and worry pulse through my veins.
Never have I had so many questions at one time in my life.
Why did she start screaming? Why won’t she talk to me?
Who did she see? I’ve never seen this side of Andie before, but then again, I haven’t known her for very long.
To be honest I’m scared, both for Andie and that I’ll lose her to whatever demons she’s fighting.
I rack my brain trying to figure out what I could’ve done wrong. Earlier in the night she gave me full permission—hell, she begged me not to stop. Maybe that didn’t matter, maybe I moved too fast? Did I push too hard? The thought that I might have hurt her in some way makes my stomach turn.
There is no piece of me that wanted to leave that room, but Maddie assured me it was best for Andie. So, I did. I stand frozen at the front door, hopelessly waiting for them to let me back in.
Realizing it’s not going to happen, I force myself towards the elevator, every step heavy like I am walking through four feet of snow in a blizzard.
The wall is victim to my frustrations as I try to calm myself.
I should feel the throbbing pain when my fist connects, instead I feel a dull ache that pales in comparison to the pain in my chest.
The desperate urge to punch it again and again until something makes sense remains, even though I somehow find the willpower to resist. My emotions have never gotten the better of me, but this whole thing is unsettling.
I need to know if she’s okay, like I need air in my lungs.
Something happened and I don’t know what it is.
Replaying her words a thousand times in my head, already wondering what they could mean. The way she kept saying she “saw him” makes me think there’s someone else in the picture I don’t know about.
An ex, maybe? I don’t know who she saw, but the fear it brings her has me concerned.
And I’m ready to protect her with everything I have.
I’ll give her the time she needs, but I’m not going to leave her.
Whether she wants me to or not, I will fight for her.
She has yet to see how hard I fight for what I want.
Pulling out my phone, I call the one person that is always there for me.
I need some advice, and something to distract me from the sounds of Andie falling apart in the bathroom.
“Hey brother, what’s up?” Evan’s voice is loud as he’s yelling over the music.
Go figure he has a woman with him. I can hear her giggling in the background.
“Are you at the club?”
“Where else would I be on a Friday night? The library?” He laughs at his own joke.
“Get your ass down here. The bourbon’s good and the women are better.
” Evan is always the party guy, not one to stay at home and relax.
Socializing and meeting new girls has been his top priority ever since he was a teenager.
I outgrew that phase, while he just continued—never growing up.
I got our parents’ work ethic, but he got their ability to charm and mingle. The ladies love him, regardless of their age. A crowded club isn’t where I want to process this, but maybe losing myself in the loud music and strong drinks will help more than sitting alone with my thoughts.
“Be there in fifteen, save me a drink. I definitely need one,” I agree as I hang up.
Once I arrive, I am thrown into the sea of wall-to-wall bodies.
The bass is so loud I can feel it in my chest like a second heartbeat.
Memories of carrying Andie around the club and her lying in my lap flash like a home movie.
As regret hits me, I find myself wanting to turn around and retreat but Evan’s expecting me.
Fuck it—maybe bourbon will ease the knot of feelings in my chest. I’ll stay for the company and drinks, hoping it will let me forget my problems for the night.
I spot Evan at the VIP table, his arm slung around a blonde I’ve never seen before.
She’s pressed close to his side, laughing at whatever charming bullshit he’s no doubt feeding her.
His trademark grimace is plastered across his face, until he catches my eye and sits with observant attention.
Evan’s smile vanishes instantly as he takes in the frowning expression on my face.
“Spencer, bro, you look like shit. Good thing I ordered the best bourbon they got.” I take the glass he hands me and slam back the entire thing like a shot.
“It’s the only thing strong enough for whatever’s got you looking like someone ran over your dog.
” I take my seat next to him, sliding the empty glass onto the table.
“Damn, Spence. What has you wound so tight?” I shake my head, trying to find the words to explain the evening.
“Wait . . . don’t tell me. Café Hottie dumped you already?
That’s gotta be a new record, even for you.
” Not sure if I truly want to explain everything, but I decide to anyway.
He’s about to get the unwelcome verbal assault of my night.
“Andie.” It’s all I say as I try to figure out what I want to tell him next.
“Andie, Andie, Andie . . .” He mulls over the name, clearly attempting to jog a memory. Finally, it clicks. “. . . Oh shit? Andie is café hottie. Wait, what about her? I thought you liked her? Like, really liked her.”
“I do like her, a lot. But I was over at her place today and after we fell asleep . . .”
“Woah, wait. Together? You were asleep together. Oh shit . . . you fucked her.” His eyes light up with a mixture of surprise and inappropriate pride. “My big brother, always the overachiever. From first sight to bedsheets in what—a few weeks? And here I thought you were losing your touch.”
“Not the point Evan. Never mind, I should never have come here.” I twist to stand but he grabs my wrist to keep me from leaving.
“You’re right, I’m sorry. That was a dick move.” Genuine concern layers his face, a rare sight for him. “Come on man, stay and tell me what happened.”
The waitress appears at our table, setting down another round without being asked.
She must have noticed how quickly I drained the first one.
The blonde shifts slightly, clearly listening, but trying to appear disinterested as she sips her drink.
Honestly, I’m too mentally fucked up to care about the audience right now, so I continue releasing every painful visual I have from the evening.
“One minute we’re both sleeping and the next she loses her shit over a nightmare and is screaming and crying.
” Grabbing another glass, I throw that one back too.
One drink at a time and maybe I’ll feel better.
“I don’t know what the fuck happened. Maddie kicked me out, and Andie won’t talk to me. I just need to know she’s okay."
Evan sees the hurt shadowing my face. “Man, that’s a lot. I honestly don’t know what to say.” Any hope I had for some advice or words of wisdom is lost until I hear a soft woman’s voice speak up.
“I do.”
Great, let’s see what the hookup of the week has to say. I’m sure it’s going to be super inspirational.
“Look I don’t know who this girl is, but if she just flipped a switch on you, she probably has somethin’ she’s workin’ through.
Something that happened maybe brought it back up for her.
Give her time, give her space.” Well shit she may be on to something.
“Just let her know that you’ll be there to talk when she’s ready for you.
If she truly likes you or wants to be with you, she’ll eventually confide in you.
Until then let her work through her own shit and don’t make her feel pressured to open up till she is ready. ”
“That’s just it. I know she’s got something happening, but I don’t know what.” I repeat like it isn’t obvious.
“Does it fucking matter? It’s her problem to handle, not yours. She’ll tell you when she’s ready.” She snaps trying to get her point across to me.
Fuck that was profound. Where did Evan find this girl? I want to tell her to mind her own business, but the truth is, she’s absolutely right.
“Damn Jenn, that’s insightful. She’s right man, give her the time she needs.”
She looks at him, perplexed. “It’s Jess, you asshole.” Jess turns to me like I am her next victim. “Oh, and another tip—make sure if you really like her . . . call her by the right fucking name.” She delivers the final blow before she walks away, leaving Evan single yet again.
“And with that I lose another date.” Evan shrugs.
“It’s okay, she was too smart for her own good, damn psych degrees, I think that’s what she said it was.
Oh well. She’s gone now.” He signals the bartender for another round.
“Besides, more for us, right bro? Nothing heals a wounded heart like bourbon and . . . well, you know.” He winks, completely missing the gravity of the situation.
I’m not sure Evan will ever find a woman at this rate, but his date did give me some things to think about. I know Maddie said give her time, but it took a stranger telling me the same thing for it to really click.
As the days go by my worry becomes stronger with every unanswered text and phone call. I’m trying to assure her I’m not going anywhere. I want her to know I’ll welcome the conversation whenever she is ready. Her cutting me off completely has my insecurities higher than ever.
What if she doesn’t feel the same way about me as I feel about her?
On day three of silence, I sent flowers to her place with a note saying When you’re ready.
By day five, I’ve sent enough flowers for her to open her own damn flower shop and enough messages to be considered a borderline stalker.
I thought of calling in a wellness check before Maddie’s texts started coming through.
I’m not typically a man who chases, but something about Andie has completely rewritten my rulebook.
Maddie says she’s fine, but it does little to ease my worries.
She won’t give me any more information leaving my imagination running wild.
The worst part? Andie’s only here for a short time, and I’m starting to wonder if I will get to see her again.
What if she just up and disappears from my life?
The idea of her leaving Chicago, leaving me, makes my chest tighten with something that feels dangerously close to panic.
Determination has always been something people admired about me, and I’m determined to understand what happened that night.
Message after message read, but unanswered turns this week into the longest week of my life.
I’ve been distracted in meetings, barely able to focus on the project updates at hand.
I’ve missed two client calls and had to start asking my assistant to transfer all conference calls to Evan.
It’s not like me to let personal matters interfere with business, but nothing about this situation feels normal.
I’m on my way to meet Evan for dinner when I feel my phone vibrating in my pocket. My heart tries to jump into my throat as Andie’s name illuminates the screen. My thumb hesitates with the possibility that answering could mean losing her forever. That’s just not something I’ll accept.