Chapter 29 Snow
SNOW
“It’s insane to me that your shower fits two people,” I murmur, uncaring whether the spray steals my words away from Xander.
Four a.m. cold pizza on the kitchen floor turned into a heart-to-heart, which led us into bed together and the best sleep I could have had after such a crazy day.
Now, with an hour until I have to be at work, sharing a shower with Xander is the perfect start to the day.
“You can’t fit two at home?” Xander’s warm body presses up against his back as his lips find my ear, ensuring that what he has to say doesn’t get lost.
“Sure, if you want to get packed in like sardines. But this?” I turn as Xander’s damp arms drape around my waist and the stream of water from the shower caresses down my shoulders. “This is all kinds of luxurious.”
“Noted,” Xander replies with a soft chuckle. “Here, let me.” His warm hands sink into my shampoo-lathered hair and he takes over massaging down to my roots.
My eyes close and a deep sense of bliss washes through me from head to toe, warmth spreading into every corner.
I could get used to this. Beyond everything else, being treated like this is addicting and I don’t want it to end.
Xander’s exceptionally good with his hands in the bedroom and it’s evident even here as he works across my scalp and through the long strands of my hair.
Then he tilts my head back and lets the water wash away all the lather.
He doesn’t stop there.
With gentle words and soft coaxing, he washes my back and gives me the best massage he can from this angle.
Tightness eases out of my shoulders and a persistent ache in my lower back near my spine vanishes after intense attention from Xander’s thumbs.
By the time the shower is over, I’m a hundred times looser and somewhat turned on that his hands were all over me and yet not where I ached for them the most.
“If you didn’t have surgery and I didn’t have work…” I trail off, sucking lightly on my teeth while wrapping a thick, fluffy towel around my body.
“I’d entertain you with a quickie,” Xander replies immediately, “but I know that once I’m inside you, I’m never going to want to leave and that just throws everything off. But trust me when I say I’ll be thinking about your soaped up tits all day, and that sexy thing between your legs.”
A soft bubble of laughter rises up as my cheeks and ears warm at his words and he arches his brow curiously at me.
“I’m sorry, I’m not laughing at you. It’s just…
There's something so unusual about hearing dirty talk from you. At work, you’re the politest, quietest man I’ve ever met and here you are talking about being addicted to my pussy. ”
Amusement glints in Xander’s eyes as he pulls on clean boxers, then he approaches me and catches my entire jaw in one hand.
Tilting my head up, he leans down and kisses me slowly while reaching under my towel with his other hand and cupping my mound.
His middle finger slides perfectly along my seam, then curls up through my lips.
“Maybe if this wasn’t so addicting, I wouldn’t be talking about it but since it’s your fault…” His finger slides deeper and circles my entrance as I gasp and heat bursts through my core, but Xander only caresses my clit once and then his hand falls away.
“You’re an ass,” I say breathlessly, clutching my towel to my chest as the throbbing ache between my legs goes unanswered.
“You don’t mean that,” Xander replies with a smirk. “Also, I have something for you.” He leaves the bathroom and after wrapping my hair in a towel, I join him in the bedroom.
Xander hands me a small pink puffball keychain. “For your key to this place. So you don’t lose it.”
I take it and my heart skips a beat. I thought that the key he gave me was new but I didn’t dare hope.
I squint up at him, and Xander continues.
“For when you need a place to crash or the hill is too icy or you can’t face that apartment. You’re always welcome here.”
“Thank you, Xander… this is adorable.”
Something about him has changed.
He seems more at ease, more peaceful and looser when we’re together, and I like it.
Our talk last night must have been good for him.
That easiness lasts until we pull up to the hospital and he lets me out at the entrance.
While we were hesitant about what people might say, it’s not uncommon for people to give each other lifts at this time of year and everyone knows I live at the top of death trap hill.
It takes all my restraint not to wave goodbye to him as I head into work.
An hour into my shift, my parents call me while I’m hurrying down flights of stairs to another patient’s floor.
Given that it’s just my own admin work I’m chasing, I pause in the stairwell and answer.
“Mom? Is everything okay?”
“Noelle! Snow! Darling, it’s been too long!”
“It has.” I lean against the railing and gaze down at the spiraling stairs beneath me.
“I’m calling because our chef is taking orders for Christmas dinner and I need to know if you’re going to come!”
“I… I had to cancel, remember? I couldn’t afford the ticket at the time.” Did she blank our entire conversation?
“I know, honey, but didn’t you get more money since then?”
My lips part and I close my eyes as annoyance creeps up my back and erases all the relaxation Xander left inside me.
Before it settles deep, though, his offer enters my mind.
Could I really let him buy me something as expensive as a plane ticket?
I’d pay him back, of course.
In fact, he’ll likely demand it once he learns I’m pregnant.
Maybe this is a sign because I certainly won’t be able to afford to travel once the baby I’m ignoring is born.
“Sure.” I purse my lips and sigh. “I just need to rebook and I’ll be there.”
“Oh, perfect! It’s been so long since we saw you. I did wish we could have visited you in June but it simply wasn’t on the travel plan.”
My back tightens. “In… June?”
“Yes, dear, we were in New York for a concert! It never gets old, I tell you.”
“Wait, you were here? In the States?” I push off the railing and step back from the edge. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I’m sure I did, dear.”
“No, you definitely did not.”
“Well it wouldn’t have mattered because we didn’t have time to come to your little town anyway.”
“But I could have—” I stop myself and grit my teeth. There’s no point.
They came all the way back to the States and didn’t think to tell me, didn’t care to visit either.
So why am I wasting time worrying about them? “I have to go.”
“Okay, dear, see you at Christmas!”
The sourness that call leaves in me fades by the afternoon when Xander and I pass each other in a supply closet and his hand lingers on my lower back.
He also brings me a drink from the vending machine and sits at my table during lunch while June engages in animated conversation with Fred.
It turns out their kids go to the same after-school club and they’ve started to bond.
After lunch, my phone suddenly ignites with messages in the girls’ group chat as Phoebe wants to organize a Christmas night out. Hannah and Gemma reply immediately, excited, and I’m about to agree until my stomach cramps.
Alcohol and a baby?
Not a good mix.
I could go and not drink, but that’s never gone down well in the past. I stare at the chat until my eyes blur, willing one of them to reply to one of my old messages or even for Hannah to remember that I badly needed to talk to her when I called.
None of that happens.
So, like always, I express my excitement and mute the chat while they work out the dates that work for them.
Maybe I can stop by for one non-alcoholic drink. Talking face-to-face might be ideal, but the more I contemplate it as I work, the more I’m not so sure.
We’ve been friends for years and I’ve helped them through illness, breakups, apartment changes and more, but when it really comes down to it… none of them were there for me.
They disliked Caleb so much that there wasn’t even any real sympathy for my loss.
Sure, I hated him but even Xander could see how much it hurt me.
Are we really friends?
Or have we just existed in the same space for long enough that it feels like there are no other options?
In the end, I unmute the chat and decline the invite.
Hannah reacts with a sad face and that’s it.
No one else notices.
Just as my mood starts to spiral, June appears with chocolate cookies from a patient and a cup of coffee.
While we’ve never spent much time together outside of the hospital, she’s somehow more caring than the people I’ve known for years.
My priorities are shifting and I like it, but deep down, I know it’s dangerous.
I can’t rely on any of this with a time bomb growing inside me poised to ruin everything.
One last amazing Christmas wouldn’t be a waste, though.
I cling to that hope until the end of my shift and find a note slipped inside my locker from Xander.
His last surgery was canceled so he went home to tend to his cats and help his neighbor to a doctor’s appointment, but he’s eager for me to come home.
He doesn’t sign the note but years of working together makes his handwriting instantly recognizable.
And it’s romantic.
A note in my locker?
It’s so old school and sweet that by the time I take a taxi to his place, I can’t keep the smile off my face.
Despite the key in my pocket with its cute new keychain, I still knock on his door just in case there’s a surprise guest inside.
I don’t want to face Thea ever again.
Xander answers with a smile and doesn’t even question my knocking as he grasps my wrist and whisks me inside.
“I’ve been waiting for you,” he says and within seconds, he’s scooped me up in his arms and shoved me against the hallway wall while kicking the door closed.
Our mouths collide while I wrap my legs around his waist and grip his shoulders, surprised at how eager he is, but the moment I tighten my thighs and my pussy presses against his waist, pleasure ignites in my brain and nothing else matters.
“All day,” I gasp between each messy kiss. “All day I’ve been thinking about you.”
“Me too. It’s highly unprofessional.”
My bag slips from my shoulder when his tongue invades my mouth, and I lose my coat somewhere between the doorway and the bedroom.
By the time I’m thrown onto the bed, my blouse is somewhere on the floor and Xander’s tearing himself out of his T-shirt in one smooth move.
I reach for him, stroking my hands up his abdomen to the soft hair dusting across his chest, then up further to clasp his neck while he surges down for another kiss and tears my bra from my body.
My indignant cry melts into a moan as he gropes my breasts and tweaks my nipples between his thumbs.
Nothing stops my legs from falling open and Xander kisses me hard, then darts right down between my thighs.
My panties join the rest of the clothes on the floor and I’m panting by the time he shoves his face against my pussy with a deep, satisfied moan.
He keeps one arm stretched up the length of my body, gripping and massaging my breast in time to the flicks of his tongue over my clit.
Two or three strokes and the cool fingers of his other hand enter me swiftly.
Clutching at his forearm, I grip tightly as pleasure rushes through me as fast as my heart pounds in my chest.
It’s so much so fast and I’m in love.
Xander eats me out like he’s ravenous, pushing himself firmly against me and burying his nose against my clit so his tongue can follow his fingers inside me.
Each wave of pleasure crests faster and faster as his fingers pump smoothly in and out of me.
Until my nails drag down his forearm and Xander hisses in pain.
Before I can speak, he seals his lips around my clit and sucks while fucking me faster and faster with his fingers.
They move like a blur and knots tighten in my core until finally, with a cry, the release and I come with a squeal.
Xander’s fingers don’t stop.
They move incredibly fast and he continues to suck hard on my clit until all my muscles relax and spasm and a rush of fluid escapes me so suddenly that heat inflames my cheeks as if I’ve been slapped.
We both realize what’s happened a second later and my cheeks burn.
“Xander, I’m so sorry!”
“I’ve always wanted to make a woman squirt.”
We both speak at the same time and then our eyes meet as Xander fully lifts his head. He seems to clock my embarrassment immediately, and his fingers slow as he surges up my body.
“Don’t. Don’t apologize. It’s natural, we both know that. It just means the pleasure was so good, you finally let go and you relaxed. Trust me, I take it as one hell of a compliment.”
I can barely look him in the eye but his voice is so firm and calming that after a few seconds, I’m able to. “Are you sure?” I lift one hand to my face. “I’ve never done that before, my God.”
“The first of many.” Xander smirks. “Now I’m going to fuck you and show you how much of an ego stroke that was.”
And he means it.
With a squirt of lube from the bedside table and a kiss so hard that I’m dazed, Xander thrusts his cock inside me and starts fucking me almost immediately.
He hooks both hands under my knees and lifts my legs, then presses them over my body and down to the bed as if he’s sandwiching me in half. It’s flexibility I didn’t know I had, but Xander’s careful in his movements and I’m too distracted by his cock to care.
From this position, he’s pounding directly down into me and hitting my G-spot on every single stroke.
The constant bursts of pleasure are so intense, I can barely breathe, and looking into his eyes this time is an entirely different experience.
I’m losing myself.
To pleasure.
To him.
It’s bringing me peace I never knew I could reach.
Every grunt, gasp, and moan is music to my ears.
I clutch at his neck, caress his cheek, and tug on his hair as pleasure builds and swells inside me, and Xander doesn’t stop.
He fucks like a man possessed, unwilling to stop even for a second, and I drink it all up with every passing second.
His mouth twists, his cheeks flush and his eyes become so dark that it’s like falling while gazing up into the dark sky.
Then we’re coming together, trembling and shaking like every joint is about to pop free, and the only thing keeping us together is my pussy clinging to his cock.
It’s so intense and the pleasure is so hot that I can’t tell if I squirted again, but judging by Xander’s pleased smile when he glances between our bodies, I think I did.
He gently lowers my legs and collapses down onto me, panting.
Forehead to forehead, we exist in the same space, sharing air while my worries melt away and my body twitches with aftershocks.
I’m falling for him.
In fact… I think I’m past the point of no return, but even that revelation and impending heartbreak don’t dampen the mood.
For now, I’m truly happy.
I’m about to tell him but as our lips meet, an indignant meow rises up from the doorway where Willow has shoved the door open, and we collapse into soft laughter instead.