19. James
19
JAMES
I t hit me this evening, how lonely I'd be when the holidays were over and this house was empty. I let my guests finish their dancing and mingled with a few, talking and having another glass of champagne, but my mind was absent. I couldn't enjoy this party, even though it was Christmas. My thoughts were on Ms. Hart, who had all but disappeared from view.
The night started to wind down, and I showed each guest out individually. A few asked about Barbra, and I told them she wasn't able to make it. I didn't tell a single one I hadn't invited her or that she'd moved out, but I knew some of them were starting to gather the truth already. It wasn't official yet. The judge had to sign off and so did Barbra, and I wasn't going to make that announcement until they both did.
Fortunately for me, my friends and family were tactful. None of them brought up the elephant in the room, and we were all able to enjoy our Christmas party without heavy conversation or brooding emotions. For that, I was grateful.
When the last guest had left and the staff were busy cleaning things up, I found Marna in the kitchen running the dishwasher and stood in the doorway until she noticed me standing there. She looked up with a smile as always.
"Good evening, Mr. Carver. How did you enjoy the party? Ms. Hart did a wonderful job, didn't she?" The mention of her name made my heart pinch a little. She'd seemed so sad and upset when we spoke, and I was confused and a little hurt by her reaction to my gift, which she hadn't even opened in my presence.
"It was a wonderful evening." I smiled politely, but I hadn't come in here to discuss the night's events. I wanted to know where Ms. Hart was. "Marna, have you seen Ms. Hart? She was acting strange when I spoke with her. I wanted to talk to her."
Marna glanced around the kitchen then focused on her work again as she said, "No, sir. I thought she was acting down too. She didn't seem herself. I think she took her plate to her room to eat alone."
I nodded, understanding what she meant. Marna and I had been together a long time. She had a way of communicating things without really saying them. She knew I preferred to keep drama away from myself as much as possible, so she kept emotion out of her communication with me. But what she was really saying was that she was concerned too. Ivy hadn't been acting right.
"Thank you, Marna. You can take the day off tomorrow. Tell the rest of the staff too." I smiled. "Merry Christmas."
"Merry Christmas, Mr. Carver." She grinned and nodded, and I backed out of the kitchen and turned toward the bedrooms where I assumed Ivy had tucked herself away.
The house felt cold tonight, and not just because of the chill outside where a cold front was ushering in heavy snowfall. It wasn't just because I was realizing how lonely I'd be in this big place without Barbra here. It felt cold because I'd gotten used to spending my time with Ivy and she seemed distant. I was starting to think she was avoiding me, though I knew she was quite busy with finding her new office space and working with Mr. Sutter to do her business plan.
But even during our brief interactions, she seemed distracted, like her mind was on other things. Maybe I'd just read too much into it to begin with, but I'd thought we had a pretty good rapport. Though I had tried to warn myself that this could happen, that she'd realize it was a mistake to get involved with a man that much older than herself.
The closer I got to the bedrooms, the more I wanted to know what was happening. As I approached the room she was staying in, I slowed. I planned to knock and ask her if we could finally sit down and discuss what was going on between us, but I heard the faint sound of sniffling and then a cough. I wondered if she was feeling ill and maybe I'd been overthinking everything. Maybe she was sick.
I knocked softly and I heard the lock click. It was a bit discouraging that she'd locked the door, but she said, "Come in," so I turned the knob and pushed the door open.
Ivy sat on the edge of her bed with a pile of tissues wadded up on the bed beside her, and I realized she wasn't sick. Her eyes were red-rimmed and her nose was puffy from crying. She had her hands folded in her lap and her head hung.
"I just wanted to check on you." I glanced around the room as I stepped in and shut the door behind me. On the off chance that any of my staff walked by, I didn't want them to see her in this state. She'd obviously come and tucked herself away because she wanted to be alone, and I felt like I was already invading her privacy enough. "You were quiet tonight, and then you disappeared."
Ivy's shoulders bobbed and she looked up at me. "I'm sorry. I'm missing home, and well…" She sighed and picked up the pile of tissues and stood. "I got into a bickering match with Kevin who thinks I should be fighting Mike more. I just don't see the point."
I watched her walk toward the bathroom, and when she returned, her hands were empty, but her eyes were still sad.
"What do you want to do?" I asked her, because it was the most honest thing I could ask. This woman had been pushed around and told what to do by men her whole professional life. I didn't want to be that in her life too, especially since we had a no-strings-attached agreement. I really meant it.
"I want to move on. I just want to start over and not drag any of that drama into my future." She sank back onto the side of the bed, and I walked over to sit next to her. "And part of me is scared that it means Kevin has to go too. He got too comfortable with Mike's way of doing things. He thinks he is smarter than me, and he can't stand it when I want to make decisions for myself."
Ivy sat there looking defeated, and I couldn't stand it. Something inside me wanted to stand up to those idiots and make them leave her alone, though I knew the only way she'd ever feel confident on her own was to do that herself once and for all. But I could comfort her.
I put my arm around her in a friendly manner, rubbing her far shoulder, and she rested her head on my bicep.
"James, I'm really sad. Everything is difficult right now. I feel alone and…" Her voice trailed off, and she sighed.
"I feel the same way, Ms. Hart." It still felt strange calling her Ivy. I much preferred the sound of her surname, and she seemed to not mind it anymore. "But we both have to realize that the people in our past are in our past for a reason. Those ties weren't strong enough to sustain the relationships. We have to move on and make new ties, new relationships."
She wiped at her cheeks again and looked up at me, and our eyes met. It was a tender moment, not supposed to be sexual in any way, but the chemistry was always there between us. I wanted to comfort her and help her as she was moving on after her bad breakup the way she'd helped me when I thought I didn't need anyone's help.
"Ms. Hart," I said, thinking I was going to give her more inspiration or comfort, but she rose up and pressed her lips against mine.
"Things are chaotic right now, James. I'm struggling, and I'm not feeling like myself." Her eyes searched mine, and all I wanted to do was make her feel whole again. My eyes dropped to her lips and then back up to meet her eyes, and I noticed she did the same thing.
"It just takes time," I whispered, but she cut me off with a soft kiss.
Until this very second, my only intention had been to come in here and talk, but when she kissed me, it was hard to focus on anything but the way she made me feel. I deepened the kiss and found myself desperate to feel her against me again. As if whatever bond we shared had been fading and the relational battery was going dead, I needed a charge, and my lips drew the power from her so I could feel alive again.
I kissed her harder, cupping her cheek and biting her lower lip. "Ms. Hart, I don't think I can leave this room unless…" I let my words fade into the silence as she took hold of my tie and pulled me against herself so we would kiss again.
I had no control over my actions anymore as my hand slid down to her waist and found its way to the hem of her skirt. Slowly, I carefully slid it upward, revealing a pair of stockings that made my heart skip a beat. Her skin, so soft and warm against my fingertips, made my dick throb.
"Ms. Hart," I muttered between ragged breaths. "What are you doing to me?"
She smiled in a mischievous manner and said, "I'm simply giving you what you want." She guided my hand higher, urging me onward. “This is what you want, right?” I almost stopped right then and there. I didn’t want her to think this was all I wanted, but I did want it. I wanted her. And by the look on her face, she wanted me too.
As if hypnotized, I obeyed her silent command, my fingers trembling with anticipation as they reached the lace-covered heat between her thighs. She moaned into my mouth, her body arching against mine, and I rubbed her through the soft, silky material. It wasn't enough. I needed more.
Taking a deep breath, I broke the kiss and looked into her eyes. "I don't know if this is such a good idea," I said, even though my actions betrayed my words.
"Neither do I," she breathed, her chest heaving against mine, "but it doesn't change the fact that I want you."
With that, she took matters into her own hands, literally, and unbuttoned my shirt. This was my last chance to walk away, to save us both from the consequences of our actions. Instead, I let her take control and allowed myself to drown in the moment.
She pushed me backward onto her bed and straddled my hips, draping herself across me until her tits were crushed against my chest. I held her by the hips and pulled her down onto my lap and she ground her pelvis against mine. She undid my tie and kissed down my chest. As she backed away, I slid the sweater up over her head and tossed it.
When she got to my fly, she was on her knees at the side of the bed. Her fingers nimbly undid the button and zipper, and my cock sprang free. She looked up at me through her lashes and smirked. She looked up at me, her eyes heavy with lust and need, and she tugged my slacks down. I kicked off my shoes as she pulled my slacks and boxers off, and as I backed across the bed, peeling my shirt off, she stood and removed her bra.
When her hands slid under her skirt and shimmied her panties down, I stroked myself and watched. She climbed on top of me and straddled my hips again, her skirt hiding both of our parts as she slid her moisture up and down my shaft. Her hands gripped my hip bones as she started grinding, and my God, I thought I’d lose it. I reached up and kneaded her tits, and she moaned softly before bending down to kiss me.
When I’d had enough of her teasing, I rolled us over and hovered over her. Her hand remained under her skirt touching her clit as I kissed her hard and crushed my lips against her mouth. She whimpered and wrapped her legs around my waist. I slid into her wet heat, sheathing myself inside her, and she moaned into my ear. I started to move slow at first, but her nails digging into my back incited me to pick up the pace. I pounded into her harder, and she moaned louder, her body arching off the bed. Her skirt rode up, revealing her shaven mound as I slammed into her again and again.
I didn't know how much longer I could last, but I wanted this to last forever. But she whimpered, “Condom,” and I had to slow. I hadn’t prepared for tonight. I didn’t have one.
Her eyes searched my expression as I swallowed hard and tried to think of what to do. “Ivy, I…”
“Oh, God, I’m so close,” she mewled, and I kept thrusting, gritting my teeth so I didn’t come, and when her pussy clamped down around me, it took all my focus not to blow my load. She shook beneath me, shuddering and coming undone, and her pussy got so wet I thought maybe I had blown already, but the pressure in my dick was so intense I kept going.
“James,” she panted, and I kissed her again and again, and when I felt my balls drawing up, I pulled out.
“What?” she gasped, and I flipped her over.
“God, you’re sexy…” Her ass was on display, skirt flipped up over her back, and I used the moisture from her orgasm to lube her ass. When I pushed in, she grunted and gasped and clawed at the bed, but in seconds, I found a rhythm again.
“You feel so good,” I panted in her ear.
“Oh, God, fuck me,” she moaned, and I did just that. I fucked her harder than before. My dick slid in and out of her tight ass, and she screamed my name as her second orgasm hit her. Her pussy clenched, and I couldn’t hold back any longer.
With a groan I came, and came, and came, filling her until my balls were empty and I collapsed on top of her. I rolled to the side and felt my dick still pulsing inside her. She was breathing heavily, panting, and I held her against my chest as I slid out.
She didn’t move a muscle, and I kept my arms around her for a long time, kissing the back of her shoulder every now and then. And when I heard light snoring, I reached up and shut off the light, then pulled the covers over us. No way in hell was I leaving her now.
Something was going on, and we had to decide what it was. I couldn’t keep pretending I wasn’t falling for her.