33. Chapter 33
Chapter 33
KAT
I slipped into the passenger seat and shut the door. “I need to make a phone call really quickly,” I said without glancing at Emma.
“Uh, you’re going to tell me what’s going on while I drive you back to your parents’ house,” she replied, and I heard the click of the car locking as the gear engaged.
Her hand plopped onto the side of my seat as she glanced out the rear-view mirror to begin backing up.
“No. I need to go find him.” I pulled my phone out of my pocket and unlocked it.
“I thought that’s what we were doing here.”
“But he’s left, so I’ve got to find him. I choose Bernie. Everyone sees him as this impulsive, immature man who messes up everything, but he’s so much more than that. His impulsivity is exciting and fun. He brings an amount of joy to everything he does that I’ve never experienced before. And he deserves to have someone choose him as much as the rest of us.” I glanced at Emma as she gently pressed the brakes and stopped our slow roll from the driveway. “Sure, he’s got his SEAL team or whatever, but shouldn’t he have more than that too? His mom can’t go find him because of Raiden. Honestly, I wouldn’t let her go find him because I made him a promise too. Not only did he keep me safe, but he didn’t once judge Sawyer about his addiction. That’s as honorable as anything.”
Emma exhaled deeply and ran her teeth over her bottom lip. “All right, make your phone call. I’ve got a day before I have to hit the airport for another business trip, so I’ll drive you wherever you need to go. After that, you can take my car. But promise me something.”
Nodding at her, I raised my brows in silent agreement.
“Promise me that you’ll communicate all of this with both of your parents, not just your mom. I know Bernie wouldn’t want an easy ticket into your life, but he’s not really had it that easy ever, has he?” She gave me a wide smile.
“No, he really hasn’t. But he did know about Wyatt from the get-go, so that part is on him.” I giggled in response.
“And that’s why you are so willing to go find him, because he never gave up on you.”
“Duh. And because I’m sick of the stereotype that it’s always the guy that has to run after the girl when she disappears. I’m not some princess who’s incapable of taking care of things on her own.” I scrolled through my contacts and found Ford’s number.
“Yeah, but Bernie treats you like one, doesn’t he? ”
I rolled my eyes as she threw the car into drive and began slowly rolling us down the road. “He literally got upset at me when I debated not eating food at the little cookout they hosted.”
Emma’s grin widened as I tapped his number and placed the phone up to my ear. It rang twice and then the line connected.
“Kat?” Ford’s deep voice slipped through the speakers along with background chatter.
“Where are you?” I asked, furrowing my brows.
“The airport, why?” he replied with a soft chuckle.
“Is Bernie with you?”
“No. I’m waiting at a layover headed home. My mawmaw called me after almost fifteen years of no contact, so I caught the first flight out of there. Which was a shitty flight that’s taking me twice as long as normal because the plane got—” He suddenly stopped talking as Emma continued down the road, headed in a random direction since I’d yet to give her an idea of where to go.
“Wait, isn’t Bernie with you? I assumed he was, which was why he hadn’t answered any of my messages,” Ford asked.
“No,” I replied with a heavy sigh and leaned back against the headrest. “He left a note for his mom. He’s gone.”
“Gone? As in gone gone? Gone as in what?” Ford’s panicked response slipped through the speaker on the phone.
“Disappeared. Took off somewhere.”
“Fuck. All right, I’ll find a flight back and—”
“Go. Clearly if your mawmaw called after fifteen years, you’re needed home. I’ll find Bernie. Any idea where he might have gone? He said he left because it would protect me, his mom. Hell, also Raiden, so that rules out anywhere they know,” I asked.
Emma raised a brow but said nothing.
I heard Ford inhale deeply as the seconds stretched between us. “I’d probably try Griffin’s house first? Then Mikey’s? You could call them, see if he’s shown up recently.”
“No, I’m going there. In person,” I replied. “Send me the addresses, please. I know he mentioned they’re close, but that’s it.”
“I’ll send them your way. If he’s not with them, he may have decided to drive cross country to Dom’s. But Dom lives all the way out in Georgia, so I doubt that would be his first stop simply because of distance.”
“Thank you, Ford. And whatever reason you had for leaving your family all those years ago, I hope you’re able to gain some closure by going home,” I said and heard him release a snort of indignation.
“Keep me updated about Bernie, please,” he replied, ignoring my final sentence.
“Will do.” And I tapped the end button.
Within a few seconds, a text message came through from Ford with two addresses attached. Clicking on the first one with Griffin’s name attached, my GPS on my phone pulled up, and we were off.
Emma picked up speed, finally having some sort of direction in mind as I drafted another message to both of my parents. One explaining where I was going and why. One that wasn’t going to allow for argument but was still full of love. Hope roared through the anger and twine of fear twisting within me. My parents had to understand. I needed them to understand .
Yes, I assumed they’d both be a little angry as well as concerned. Which was their right as I was their daughter. But I was also a grown-ass woman who could make her own choices. And someone I cared about more than I’d cared about another person in my lifetime was hurting and needed me.
They could chew me out once I returned home, but all I thought about was Bernie and finding him. Reaching him. And I pressed send on my message.
My knuckles hovered in front of the door of a house that was both grand and inconspicuous. Whoever this Griffin guy was, had money, but he certainly wasn’t one interested in flaunting it. A two-story brick house with pristinely trimmed hedges and an immaculate lawn housed a Cadillac Escalade in the driveway. It all gave hints to the fact that this man and my family were certainly not in the same tax bracket.
Inhaling deeply, I finally knocked on the ornate front door.
With my heart racing in my throat, I glanced over my shoulder at Emma who remained seated in the car. She gave me a hesitant thumbs up. With a shrug, I returned my attention to the front door as I heard a lock disengage.
Without a squeak, the door swung open and my mouth fell open. The most beautiful woman emerged from the house with a body I’d never be able to have. Shiny, brown hair fell to her mid back in beautiful waves like a waterfall. Her athletic outfit adorned a muscular body and curves that blew me away.
Yet, despite how striking she was, her eyes were soft, and she gave me a polite smile. “Can I help you?” she said. Her voice was silky like milk and cookies.
“Uh,” I mumbled, unable to pry my gaze away from her powerful and feminine features. There was a part of me that knew despite how tough I was, this woman could go toe-to-toe with the best wrangler.
I shook my head as her hand slid down from the doorway, attempting to rid myself of this strange daze I found myself in. “Uh, is Griffin here?” I asked.
The smile slid from her face, replaced by curiosity, and she glanced around me at Emma who waited in the car. “Not at the moment,” she stiffly said. The chill in her words swept a shiver down my spine. It snapped me to attention.
“I’m sorry, I should introduce myself. I’m Kat. Ford sent me Griffin’s address because he thinks Bernie might—”
“Wait! You’re the girl that Bernie called Griffin about.” She tipped her head as I nodded. “Ford sent you Griff’s address?”
Her eyes darted back to the car that my best friend waited in.
“I’m hoping Bernie’s been by recently,” I said as her gaze drifted back to mine.
“Is he okay?” she asked, concern tightening her features.
“I think so. I just need to find him. He kinda left after some shit went down, and he blames himself for the fact I got shot. But the bullet just grazed my arm, and it wasn’t his fault. At all. ”
Her brows raised as a knowing smile lifted upon her lips. “That sounds familiar. I’m sorry though, Bernie’s not been by. I could call my husband and have him track Bernie’s cell?” she offered. “I’m Jane, by the way.”
I gave her a courteous nod. “I have his phone since he left it behind. Ford said he might be over at Mikey’s if he’s not here?”
“Hold on,” she suddenly said and spun on her heels, leaving me waiting in the cracked doorway alone.
I stared at the magnificent chandelier hanging in her foyer and caught sight of a few wayward toys scattered about the beautiful hardwood.
A smile drifted upon my lips despite the uncertainty and anger that still roared hot in my veins. What a life she seemed to live. One that I had a modicum of hope to one day have.
With Bernie.
An involuntary gasp escaped my mouth. Was I in love too?
I was more scared of what life would be like without him than I was of the heartbreak that could come with giving him everything. He had shaken my world like a storm raging in spring.
Bernie. I loved him.
It wasn’t just the promise I’d made driving me to find him, it was also how I felt about him.
The sound of footsteps nearing me pulled my attention back to the house and Jane appeared around the corner with another stunning woman. Her skin was as dark and dewy as the mountains after a heavy rainfall, and her eyes held a mischievousness of adventure and joy .
“Kat, this is Scottie.” Jane gestured at the slender, athletic woman with hair sleek like the sky at midnight. “Scottie, Kat’s wondering if Bernie’s been by your house?”
I furrowed my brows as a familiarity about her settled upon me. “Your house? And why do I feel like I’ve seen you before?”
“Mikey’s my boyfriend. He’s out with Griffin and their kids since Jane and I wanted some girl time.” She gave me a polite smile and raked her fingers through her hair.
My eyes widened. “Wait! You were at the bar too.”
Her grin grew. “And you’re the girl Bernie accidentally hit in the forehead with a bottle cap. Which, in his defense—”
“He was drunk and aiming for you. Don’t worry, I’ve forgiven him, but I still give him shit for it,” I replied as her shoulders bounced with a gentle chuckle.
“You are perfect for him,” she said and then raised a brow at Jane. “She’s absolutely perfect for Bernie, isn’t she?”
Jane nodded. “She’s just his type. And gorgeous too.”
My heart sank. A flood of unusual insecurity gracing me for the first time since high school. “His type? Sure…” I muttered.
Jane furrowed her brows as Scottie pursed her lips.
“What’s that mean?” Scottie asked.
I tucked my shoulders up to my ears. “I don’t know. I mean, he did leave, so how am I really his type…?” I waved a hand up and down my body. Compared to these two incredible women, I was anything but. “I mean you two are fit and stunning. Slender and everything I’m not. ”
My voice caught in my throat. For the first time since meeting Bernie, I realized how different we truly were. Two entirely different worlds collided, and somehow, I’d won the heart of an extraordinarily handsome Navy fucking SEAL.
“Kat. I doubt the attitude you gave him at the bar has lessened. That’s his type. He needs someone who doesn’t put up with his shit. And why does being fit equate to being slender?” Scottie began.
I raised my gaze to meet both women in front of me. Jane tipped her head as a smirk slid across her face. “Besides, if I recall, Bernie wouldn’t stop going on about how you out-wrangled all of the cowboys back at your ranch. Oh, and at the rodeo you two went to, apparently you were the one in charge when it came to loading the chutes,” Jane explained.
“Mikey may have mentioned that Bernie also said something about how effortless you looked riding your horse during branding day and the cattle drive. I’ve been on a horse only once before and I’ve never been so fucking sore after,” Scottie said and crossed her arms.
I inhaled deeply, shoving out the doubt that had crept into my mind. “Thank you,” I whispered. “I didn’t know I needed to hear that out loud until now.”
Jane gave me a gentle smile, as if she somehow knew on a more personal level what I was feeling. “You don’t strike me as someone usually insecure with herself. I know how hard it can be when the person you love thinks leaving is what’s best for you. It can destroy your self-confidence. Or…”
“Or I can use it as an opportunity to grow,” I finished for her, and she nodded .
“Now, if Bernie hasn’t been here or at your place, where would he go?” Jane asked, glancing at Scottie.
“Dom’s?” Scottie offered.
Jane shook her head. “Griffin talked to him this morning, and he’s with his parents headed to a family reunion at this massive lake on the east side of Georgia. He would’ve said something.”
I sighed and rolled my head back as a thought popped into my head. But Jane beat me to it. “What about visiting Duncan’s mom?”
Scottie shook her head and then furrowed her brows. “You know what, after his text to the group chat a couple nights ago mentioning that Duncan’s mom got the cookies he sent her, he did say something rather odd and then has been absent from the group since. I brushed it off because well, we’re all trying to process Duncan’s death, but now that he’s missing.” She dug into the front pocket of her black joggers and pulled out her phone.
Jane and I studied her as she slid her thumb up the screen. “Here it is. He said, ‘I wish we could go back to right before reality hit. During that time when I knew he was dead, but I was still able to deny it. When we were all a little buzzed and being loud assholes and I saw the most beautiful woman I’d ever met. Be nice to not feel like I’m always failing.’” Scottie looked up from her phone and stuffed it back in her pocket.
“Again, I didn’t think anything of it because Dom’s sent a message like that a few times, and again, we’re all grieving. Hell, we’ve all felt that. I guess I didn’t realize how much it really impacted Bernie,” Scottie muttered and dug her toe into the hardwood.
“Let me hurry and call Duncan’s mom to see if Bernie’s come by,” Jane said .
As bright as the sun on a cloudless day, I suddenly knew where he’d gone to.
I shook my head. “There’s no need. I know where he went.”
“What?” Jane and Scottie blurted out at the same time.
“I know where he is. He said he wanted to go back to when it didn’t hurt so much. When was the last time it didn’t really feel like the final goodbye?” I continued, and Scottie raised her brows.
“Arlington?” she hesitantly asked.
“Not the cemetery. Bernie won’t talk about the funeral. But he was laughing with your entire team right after at the bar .” I spun on my heels and waved over my shoulder. “Thank you both!”
“Wait!” Jane shouted. “We’re coming with you!”
I paused and glanced back. “I really appreciate that, but I’d like to go get him by myself if that’s all right?”
Scottie smiled as Jane slumped her shoulder against the doorframe. “Go on. Let us know when you two are back. By the way, who’s that?” Jane asked, nodding toward Emma.
“Oh, my best friend. She’s got a business trip to go on, so I’ll drop her off at the airport. Or probably we’ll both get on flights, just to different places,” I replied and jogged down the sidewalk.
Just as I rounded the front of Emma’s car, I heard Scottie mutter, “She’s Dom’s type, isn’t she?”