Chapter 19
Christmas Day dawned bright but blustery. As she cleaned up after breakfast, Kasia looked out the kitchen window to see Tierney coming down the lane while fighting to control an armful of gift bags acting like sails in the wind. Kasia was struck by how endearing she looked and ran out into the car park to help.
“Shit, I didn’t think about the wind when I left the cottage.” Tierney handed over the largest bag. “Merry Christmas.”
“Let’s get you and everything inside in one piece before we begin the gift-giving.” Kasia chuckled and bundled Tierney through the doors, then quickly closed them.
Tierney leaned against the closed door and breathed a long sigh. She’d replaced her usual green beanie with a Santa hat that the wind had blown askew. The bobble hung down over one eye. Kasia’s fingers itched to move it and straighten Tierney’s windblown curls. She clenched her fist and moved out of Tierney’s personal space. I really need to curb these impulses to touch her all the time.
Tierney’s beaming smile faded a little. “You okay? Have the guests been hard work?”
Kasia straightened the frown her inappropriate thoughts had produced and smiled back. “No, they’ve been lovely. Most of them have gone for a Christmas morning walk to blow off the cobwebs.”
“They’ll blow off more than cobwebs out there.” Tierney shrugged off her coat and straightened the hat so the bobble hung down her back. “I’m guessing you warned them to stay away from the cliff path.”
“I did.” Kasia tipped her chin toward the harbor where a handful of well wrapped-up people were making their way across the stony shore. “Most of them opted to stay close.” She led the way into the dining room. “I saved you some bacon, and I’ll make fresh eggs now. Come and sit down. Joey will be here soon.” A sharp pull on her arm made her turn back to Tierney.
“Hey, I came here to spend time with you and Joey, not to be waited on. Sit down, and I’ll get food. Have you eaten?”
Kasia shook her head. She usually ate before she served breakfast, but as it was Christmas, she’d allowed herself to sleep a little later. The smell of food had been driving her crazy all morning.
Tierney pushed her into a seat at a table by the window. “Give me ten minutes. You want coffee?”
“Always. Thank you.” Once Tierney disappeared through the kitchen doors, Kasia took a deep breath, allowing her body to relax. It had been a long time since anyone other than Joey had prepared a meal for her, and it had certainly never happened here, in her workplace.
She watched the distant figures on the shore for a few minutes until the crunch of tires on gravel announced Joey’s arrival. She met them at the door and was wrapped in warm arms.
“Merry Christmas. It’s a wild one out there.”
She allowed herself an extra few moments in Joey’s embrace, enjoying the connection. She should’ve hugged Tierney when she’d arrived, but she hadn’t trusted herself. She had to keep those walls in place. Tierney was revealing herself to be much more caring and considerate than Kasia could ever have imagined, but she was a temporary resident. One day she’d leave; Kasia couldn’t afford to rely on her.
Joey held her at arm’s length. “Everything okay?”
She laughed lightly. “Of course. Tierney is cooking us breakfast.”
“And you’re worried the hotel will burn down with us inside?” Joey’s blue eyes twinkled.
She took Joey’s hand and led them to the dining room. “I was thinking we need to tease Tierney less about being useless. She’s really making a difference here now, and it must be tiring to constantly be told you’re incompetent.”
Joey’s lips twitched as they sat down opposite. “Understood.” They opened their mouth to say more, but Tierney returned to the room, carrying dishes of steaming food.
“Great timing, Joey. I assumed you’d be hungry.” She placed plates in front of them and returned to the kitchen, then she emerged with a jug of coffee. “Eat up before it gets cold.”
“You guessed right.” Joey tucked in with gusto. “This is delicious, thank you,” they mumbled around a mouthful of food.
“Kasia did most of it. I just finished off.” Tierney poured coffee into a mug and handed it to Kasia with a wink.
Kasia ignored the tingle of something inside. “What you do with these eggs is amazing. I’m never this ambitious.”
“Ha.” The dismissive laugh didn’t reflect the flush of color on Tierney’s cheeks. “I don’t think the Waterside’s regular customers expect chili in their eggs.”
“And maybe that’s where we’re going wrong. A more ambitious food offer would bring in a whole new clientele. We just need the staff to deliver it.” Kasia cursed herself for bringing it up when Tierney looked away. “Sorry, let’s just enjoy our food.”
Why did she always bring things back to work? She needed to relax a little, especially at Christmas. She took a long drink of coffee and hoped they could return to the festive atmosphere of earlier.
Tierney stretched out on the couch by the Christmas tree. She should probably get up, but her body was heavy with good food and hard work, and it was tempting to close her eyes. Just for a few minutes. But knowing Kasia was still hard at work, she pushed herself up from the soft surface.
“Ha. Caught you slacking, cuz.”
She turned to see Aoife, Seán, Christy, and the three children all crowding into the hallway. “Hey, Merry Christmas to you all. I’m so pleased to see you. I was going to come over, but Kasia said you were planning to visit.” She hugged them all as the kids’ voices chattered over each other to tell her about their Christmas gifts.
Christy rolled his eyes. “Don’t worry, we won’t stay too long. We always came to see the tree and visit Granny, and it seemed a shame to end the tradition, especially while there’s still a Walsh in the Waterside.”
A cramp of guilt squeezed Tierney’s guts. What were the chances of her being here next year? Probably slim to none. In fact, the more successful she and Kasia were in convincing her dad to keep the hotel and invest, the less need there would be for her to be here. Why did that prospect not make her as happy as it would have a few weeks ago? She put it down to being surrounded by this part of her family and shook off the weird feeling, joining the kids as they stared up at the tree.
“If we go halfway up the stairs, we’ll be able to see the angel on the top.” She led Ruane up by the hand and the two girls followed, leaving the adults to go find Kasia working in the residents’ bar.
The day didn’t get much calmer until the cousins went home, and Kasia closed up the bar. A couple of other locals had drifted in as it was the only place open on the island, but Tierney had been insistent Kasia go off duty at seven. She pulled the shutters down on the bar and said goodnight to the few remaining residents nursing their drinks by the fireplace.
“You’ve done enough today. I’ve been busier than I ever have on a Christmas Day, and I haven’t done half the work you have.” She shooed Kasia up the stairs and followed.
“It’s okay, I’m used to it.”
“I’m closing the hotel for January and February as Granny used to. You’re taking a proper break for a couple of weeks, and then we can get workers in for repairs, and we can do some of the cosmetic stuff ourselves.”
Where had that come from? She hadn’t discussed it with her dad or got his permission. But her attempt at a Christmas Day call with him had been so stilted and awkward, and she was sick of their poor relationship. She’d spend what she needed to get the hotel up and running for the new season.
Kasia stopped and turned. Her eyes were wide with just a shade of skepticism coloring the surprise. “When was this decided? You didn’t say.”
“Uh, I spoke to Dad earlier.” Not a lie, per se. “The work needs doing, and it’ll be easier with the hotel closed. Now let’s get upstairs and have ourselves a little party.”
Joey had gone up ahead, and a warm red glow flickered on the walls as they entered Kasia’s rooms. The fire was blazing, and Joey was unwrapping a platter Tierney had bought on the mainland and stored at the cottage after she’d found out about Kasia’s love affair with cheese.
Kasia went straight to check it out. “This is amazing. Where did you get all of these?”
“Tierney went specially to a deli in Galway.” Joey grinned.
“They’re all Irish-made varieties. And there are crackers and the last of Granny’s pickle.” Tierney stood back, hoping her gesture would be appreciated.
Kasia cut off a sliver of Gubbeen and chewed it slowly. “Delicious.” Her face lit up. “Thank you, Tierney. It’s the best Christmas present ever.”
Tierney’s face heated. “I doubt that very much. But I’m happy to join you in trying them out. I’d never heard of most of them.” She picked up a plate and turned to the table to hide the pleasure she felt at Kasia’s simple gratitude. What was going on with her?
Conversation was mainly cheese-based for the next twenty minutes, until Tierney dropped onto the couch and groaned. “I thought a cheese headache was a myth.” She took a healthy swallow of the wine Joey had contributed to the party. “This is good stuff too. Where’d you get it?”
Joey looked at the label. “It was a gift from customers in Galway.”
“Your favorite customer?” Kasia took the bottle with a grin and topped up her glass.
Joey dropped to the couch. “I don’t have favorites.” They turned to Tierney. “I don’t want to spoil the mood, but you said you’d tell us about what’s going on at home.” They placed their big hand on her knee and squeezed. “We’re worried about you.”
Tierney felt the warmth of Joey’s concern, but it was swamped by the wave of misery the bustle of Christmas had been keeping at bay.
“Only if you want to.” Kasia sank into the armchair and threw Joey a glare.
Tierney rested her head back. “A problem shared, I guess.” What if they thought it was all her fault somehow?
“Did something happen with Megan?”
Joey didn’t know Megan well, as she’d rarely visited the island. But they knew how important that relationship was to Tierney, and they must have noticed she’d stopped mentioning Megan in conversation. She couldn’t; it was just too upsetting.
“You could say that.” The only way to get this out in the open was to just say it. “Before Megan’s mom died, she told her that my dad was Megan’s birth father.”
She rubbed her forehead and focused on the arm of the couch.
“Dad has come clean, but said he kept it quiet for Megan’s sake. He’s an asshole.” She looked up after a few seconds of silence to find Joey and Kasia were both staring at her.
“So Megan is your sister?” Joey blinked a few times.
“Yeah, but she kind of blames me as well as Dad. I’m not really sure why. She won’t talk to me.” Tierney picked at a loose thread on the arm of the couch.
“Tierney, that’s a massive thing to carry around with you and not say anything to me.” Joey gestured toward Kasia. “To us. We’re your friends.”
The last thing Tierney had wanted was to upset any more of the people she depended on in life. Her eyes burned with the urge to cry. “I didn’t want…”
Clearing her throat didn’t help. A big lump of self-pity reared up inside. “I didn’t want you to know how fucked up my life was.” It came out as a sob. “My dad is a dick, I haven’t talked to my mom in months, I have a sister who thinks I’m a selfish asshole, I never finish what I start, I can’t get my career off the ground, and everyone thinks I’m a waste of space.” She hiccupped as she cried.
Joey crossed the space between them on the couch and wrapped her in strong arms. It didn’t help with the sobs.
“You haven’t done anything wrong. This is your dad’s mess.”
“I made it worse.” She pulled back a little and wiped her eyes on her sleeve. “With Megan. And now she won’t speak to me.”
“She perhaps just needs some time,” Kasia said softly.
“It’s Christmas.” Tierney turned to her. “We usually spend Christmas Day together. This year, she won’t pick up my calls." She sniffed. “It hurts.” She leaned back into Joey’s shoulder, so she didn’t need to look at anyone.
“Did you talk to your dad?” Kasia asked.
“I tried. He says he did everything for the right reasons and refuses to take any responsibility for not telling Megan or me the truth. I don’t know if Megan will ever be able to forgive him. I need to be there to help her work through it, but she doesn’t want me.”
“Is there anything we can do to help?” Joey squeezed her tight.
“Or if you just need to talk.” Kasia leaned forward in her chair. “I know how it feels to have a complicated relationship with family. I’m here any time you want to off-load, okay?”
Tierney nodded over Joey’s shoulder. “Thanks. I think it’s best if I keep busy until Megan’s ready to talk.”
She pulled away from Joey and found a tissue to blow her nose. Kasia must think she spent all her time crying.
“But it has helped to share the whole shit show with you both. Thanks for listening.” Strangely enough, and despite her hysterical outburst, she did feel a little better. “Now, can we get back to our party? Is there any of that Christmas cake left, Kasia? It’s the best I’ve ever had.” A look passed between them, but she hoped they’d let her change the subject.
Kasia pushed herself up out of the chair. “Sure, I saved you both a piece.”
Tierney took herself back up the hill to the cottage a few hours later. The evening had been filled with easy conversation and laughter. She’d always known Joey was good company, but when Kasia was relaxed, she was a delight to spend time with. Her company was a little too addictive, if Tierney was honest. She felt a rush of anticipation at them spending a lot of time together in the next couple of months. But where would it lead? And would it all be for nothing if her dad decided to sell up? The thought made her feel a little sick.