Chapter 31 Shiloh #2
I press up on my toes, kissing him, and he picks me up, and I melt into his mouth.
He feels so right. Like I belong with him.
The past month, all I have felt is numb, cold, and unmoving.
My grief was taking me over at every turn.
Whenever I tried to think, I was just reminded that he was gone.
I needed Verge, but I couldn't see past my anger to hear him out.
As our tongues tangle, he picks me up, and I feel him shift, walking up the stairs, holding me with one hand and opening the loft door with the other.
As he steps through the threshold of the loft, he kicks the door shut behind him, walking me over to the counter and sitting me down.
He situates himself between my legs, and I can feel him hard against my thighs.
He kisses my neck, and chill bumps erupt all over my body.
His cold hands make their way up my shirt, and I sigh as he grabs my breast in his hand.
“Verge,” I whisper, and he pulls back, searching my eyes.
He then pulls my shirt over my head, throwing it behind me and reaching around to unclasp my bra.
He leans me back, kissing me deeper, and I moan into his mouth.
I didn’t realize how much I missed his hands on me this way, and I pull him closer, and his hat falls to the floor.
He wraps his arm around my waist, lifting me, and he rips my sweatpants off along with my panties.
I’m now bare on the countertop, and he reaches behind him, and with one motion, his shirt is off and on the floor along with my discarded clothes.
Leaning me back gently, he hovers over me, kissing every inch of me.
I look into his eyes as he makes his way down my torso.
He’s so perfect in every way. He grabs behind my neck, lifting me up to him, and our chests heave together.
Bringing his forehead to mine, he snakes his arm around my bare body, and we are skin to skin.
Heavy breaths are exchanged between us along with kisses before he pulls back, jaw flexing, and he says, “You’re all I’ve ever wanted, Shi, today, tomorrow, every minute of every day, I want you, forever and only you, baby.
I’ll quit tomorrow. I’ll give it all up if it's between that or you. It’s not worth it if I don’t have you. ”
I pull him to me, needing his skin on mine.
Bringing his hand to my breast, he lowers his head, sucking my nipple into his mouth, and I gasp as I run my fingers though his thick dark hair.
With his free hand, he guides it up my thigh until he meets my core, running his hands up and down my folds before he pushes two fingers in, pumping them in and out.
A wave of pleasure overtakes me as I pant, and I lean back slowly, and he spreads me wider.
“Relax, baby,” he murmurs, and I let my legs fall to the side.
He brings a hand to my clit, circling as his other fingers work me slowly, and I arch my back, trying to catch my breath, but all the air in the room feels lost while his hands bring me back to life.
He scoots me to the edge of the counter.
“Sit up, baby.” As I sit up, he uses his free hand to pull off his jeans and boxers, freeing himself, and he groans.
He brings his hand back to my center, and I nearly fall back at the wave of pure ecstasy that I feel.
He works me for a little while longer before pulling his fingers from me, and he lines himself up, stroking himself at my entrance, going up and down slowly, making sure I’m ready for him.
He lifts my leg and pulls me to him. “I love you, from the moment I laid eyes on you, Shi, I knew I had to have you.”
“I love you, Verge,” I whisper back.
He pushes into me slowly, and I moan, feeling all of him slide into me.
He pulls me closer, his hands rocking my hips back and forth against him.
I throw my head back, and the emptiness I felt inside before is gone with him loving me the way he is right now.
I feel like a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders as he makes love to me.
With his hands on my hips, I grind back against him, and he groans a low groan, and it sends a wave of pleasure through me.
He picks me up off the counter, keeping us connected as he walks to the couch, laying back with me on top of him.
I straddle him, moving back and forth as he brings one hand to my breast and the other to my center, circling my clit.
I suck in what feels like all the air around me as my orgasm builds, but I’m not quite there.
He brings his hand to my ass, keeping my rhythm steady, and says, “Come on, baby, let go.”
His words send me to completion, and I gasp and moan, shuddering around him. I close my eyes, letting my head fall heavy as I scream, “VERGE.”
I feel him grow harder under me, and his whole body stiffens as he loses himself, rocking back and forth against me, spilling into me. He lets out a breath that seems like he’s been holding as he grinds inside of me.
We both sit there smiling at each other, and I lean down, kissing him. When I go to pull back, he puts his hand on the nape of my neck, keeping me close and looking in my eyes before he says, “Don’t leave me again.”
“Never,” I promise.
He uses his arm to sit up with me still straddling him.
He stands and carries me as he walks to the shower.
He turns it on, putting me on my feet, and as it warms, he gestures for me to hop in.
He stands behind me, washing me from head to toe, being so gentle.
He puts shampoo in my hair and massages my scalp.
I insist on him letting me return the favor by washing him as well.
Once we are done, we towel off and slide into bed together.
I’ve missed laying beside him and wrapping around him at night more than I realized.
I breathe him in, and he smells like leather and cedar all wrapped into one, and it makes me feel like home.
The hole I felt in my heart after Cross was all-consuming, and I had no time to think about anyone other than myself, and I suddenly feel so self-absorbed.
I let the grief take over me so much that I had not stopped to consider how anyone else may have felt.
I felt like the world slowed down, and it was everything I could do to keep up and keep my heart beating.
Laying on his chest, I look up at him, and his eyebrows pinch together before he says, “What’s wrong, baby?”
“I haven’t even asked Tyler how she is. Or Cash. Verge, I’ve been so self-absorbed in my own grief that I haven’t even stopped to think about anyone else,” I admit, and saying it out loud feels like a sucker punch right to the gut, and my vision goes blurry with the tears collecting in them.
“Shi, everyone handles things differently, and we all knew you were going to take the most time. No one is upset with you, or thinks you are self-absorbed, baby. We will figure it all out tomorrow.” I wipe my eyes, nodding, my mind swirling with questions.
He wraps his strong arms around me, and I melt into him, tracing my fingers along his abdomen. My eyes grow heavy with the weight of today. I want to fight to stay awake to talk things out more, but before I know it, my eyes are closed, and I’m drifting off to sleep.