16. Debts
“ W here are you taking me?” I asked, failing miserably to keep the irritation out of my voice.
“To see an old friend,” Edward said. He’d been suspiciously quiet as he led me deeper inland. Luring me to follow him with promises that he could give me answers. And yet he remained annoyingly silent. I was beginning to wonder if I’d made a mistake. I hadn’t been in my right mind, and the initial shock of his resurrection from the dead compelled me to follow. But the longer I followed him, the more my rational brain questioned the choices I was making.
Edward was relentless, pushing on through the night, the two of us absconding in the darkness. The monotony of pace and Edward’s perpetual silence had my mind wandering to James. What would happen when he slept off the rum? What would he do when he realized I was gone? The vindictive side of me hoped my absence would crush him. Bring him to the realization that he’d truly fucked up. I wanted him to feel the same pain that had taken up permanent residence in my heart.
But the other half of me worried. Would he be in pain? Who would tend his bandages? Had he spiked a fever during the night? If my vision was to be believed, James still had a long life ahead of him, regardless of his injury. Which brought on a new layer of anxiety that pooled in my belly. What if that life no longer included me?
When the white tower of the Temple Mount rose from the canopy, it was clear what our destination was. Meadow had piqued my interest when she mentioned the place. Apparently, Edward was also aware of the great knowledge and power the temple possessed. The idea that someone here might be able to help me decipher my visions allowed a small kernel of hope to bloom in my chest. I was desperate to find a reason, any reason at all, that my vision had been wrong.
We passed through an arched entrance into the main courtyard. Though we were cloaked by a dense mist in the shadowed dawn, there was no need to hide. The Temple was open. No doors or guards were there to deter us. Ivory walls seemed to glow in the waning moonlight, and the grounds hummed with a primitive power. The very building funneled energy around it like a conduit.
“You have friends here?” I asked, remembering that this was a place of worship. A notion that was completely at odds with the man I knew.
“I have friends everywhere.”
“Why do I think you’re using the term ‘friend’ loosely?”
He turned to glare at me. “The man you see before you today is a product of circumstance. I wasn’t always this way.”
“Man? Don’t you mean fae ?” Edward’s glare turned deadly, and I swallowed hard, knowing I was testing his patience. He turned his back on me, ending the conversation. It was an obvious dismissal and further indication that he wasn’t interested in discussion. The honesty of his statement began to sink in. I realized that I, too, was a different person now. Forever altered after all I’d been through. As we marched on, I mourned silently for the woman I once was because she was surely dead now.
He led me down a hallway of doors, stopping at the last one in the row. I jumped at the sound of his fist pounding on the heavy wooden slab, rattling it on its hinges. When no one answered, he knocked again, harder this time.
“Maybe your friend doesn’t live here anymore,” I suggested, but he ignored me.
“Come on, Amara. Open up. I know you’re in there!” he commanded and continued to pound on the door.
“Edward! We’re making a scene. I think?—”
“What’s so important that it cannot wait until morning?” A distinctly feminine voice called out before the door opened a crack. “éadbard? My Divine, is it really you?” she said with a condescending smile.
The door opened a fraction more, revealing a beautiful nymph cast in the glow of candlelight from within. Her features were stately and distinguished. High cheekbones and a finely chiseled nose gave her an heir of superiority. Dark curls cascaded over a blanket that was pulled tight around her shoulders, a hint of gray woven through the strands.
“Cut the pretense, Amara. I know you’re not delighted to see me.”
“What are you doing here?” she hissed as she stuck her neck out and scanned the hallway, her eyes fixating on me.
“I need to see him. I have a favor to collect,” he said, drawing her intrusive stare from me.
“I don’t know who you’re talking about.”
“Don’t play dumb with me. You’ve been sneaking him into your private quarters for centuries now. Some things never change.”
She stared at him, her mouth set in a sharp line of contemplation before she waved us into her room, scanning the hallways once more before closing the door behind us.
“You are in exile and distinctly male. It would be improper for you to be seen entering the private quarters of a priestess at night,” she scolded.
“Don’t act like you’re a stickler for the rules. I’m sure your cunning mind could come up with an excuse if we get caught.”
“You can come out, Kían,” she called to the seemingly empty room.
A half-dressed male stumbled from behind a curtain, pulling his pants into place. The middle-aged fae straightened himself and promptly rubbed his eyes in disbelief.
“Kían! Friend, time has been good to you, I see,” Edward said warmly.
“Wish I could say the same for you,” Kían sneered, giving Edward a not-so-warm welcome. “What are you doing here? How are you even here?”
“I’m delighted to see you as well,” Edward said, evading his question with overtly sarcastic formality.
“You show up uninvited and unannounced at the crack of dawn, and you expect us to welcome an exiled fae into our home with open arms? With a strange mortal on your arm, no less. Who the hell is she, anyway?”
“This is Katherine. Soon to be my mate.” The pair looked at me, their eyes widening as they took me in. I’m sure a similar expression was plastered on my face, but it wasn’t the time or place to argue with him.
“A human woman?” Kían asked.
“Not just any human. She’s one of the few in the thirteenth realm that’s been blessed with the early seeds of magic.”
“Hmm, poor girl,” he said, his appraisal of me turning to pitiful disgust. Amara, however, had a flash of curiosity cross her gaze before she covered it with a mask of indifference.
“Edward,” I whispered, pulling at his sleeve to get his attention. “What are we doing here? I think we should go.”
“Nonsense. You wanted answers, right? And now I’m in the market to collect on that favor I am owed.”
“I’m not throwing you out on your ass in respect for the friendship we once had,” Kían started. “But you know the laws of the realms. You’re in exile. If I help you and they find out?—”
“Are you enjoying this fine life here in Neverland?” Edward interrupted. “What was the name of that position I secured for you?” Edward stroked his beard, an amused look on his face. A look I was all too familiar with. He was playing with his prey. “Oh yes, Magister! I’m sure that being a scholar of such high order offers you many luxuries and great status among the people here. It would be a shame for me to undo all that I have done for you.”
“éadbard, it’s not that simple?—”
“It is that simple. Katherine,” Edward said, reaching a hand to me. “Give me the stone.” I felt all the eyes in the room fall on me. I knew that if I didn’t produce the ruby, Edward would easily rip it from my body once he’d punished me for disobeying him. This was a mistake, and it was all my fault. I fished it from my pocket and set a world of power in his outstretched palm. “It’s all so simple because I have the Heart of the Divine.” The presence of the ruby was all it took to silence the room.
Early morning rays filtered into the Temple Mount’s immense library, illuminating a pile of dusty books. I blinked back the fatigue that made my head ache. I’d been awake for far too long, and the strain of it all was wearing me thin.
“It might help if you tell us what exactly you’re looking for,” Amara grumbled as she closed yet another ancient tome.
“Amara, you disappoint me. I thought, of all people, you would’ve had me all figured out. All these books are nothing more than historical accounts.”
“We may learn something in the histories. Maybe someone discovered a loophole to the ruby's power,” I said, trying to be useful even though I had no idea what we were looking for. I’d been led to believe that Edward brought me here to help with my visions. But it was clear he had ulterior motives, and he’d kept me completely in the dark about them.
Edward’s cold eyes shifted to me. A condescending smile on his face. “You look a lot prettier with your mouth closed.”
My jaw clenched as I held my tongue. Not a single day had passed, and he’d fallen back into his old ways. I was still nothing more than property to him. His obsession with the ruby hadn’t changed. I was the fool for believing he could be any different. Each passing moment confirmed that I had made a mistake following Edward. But even if I wanted to leave and give up my chance at finding answers, Edward wouldn’t oblige.
“Amara, I don’t need detailed notes on how the Heart of the Divine came into being. I need something that dares to be more,” Edward said.
“Don’t expect me to read your mind! One cannot predict the actions of a fae who’s truly lost his soul,” Amara snapped.
Edward chuckled as he leaned back in his chair. “It’s because you have no vision, Amara. You’re trapped inside a little box the Divine has put you in. I'm ready to break the chains.”
“Be plain, éadbard! I’m growing weary of your riddles. You came to collect a favor, but you have yet to name that favor. What do you want?” Kían asked, slamming a fist on the table.
“You ruin all the fun, Kían. There is a particular text that contains rituals, ones the Divine never wanted us to know. The Book of Divine Desecration .”
“That book no longer exists. All the copies were destroyed ages ago, and for good reason,” Amara said dismissively.
“Is that so? You see, I have it on good authority that not all of them were destroyed. Twelve copies were spared. One sent to each of the magic-wielding realms for safekeeping.” Amara remained silent, and it was as much of an admission as if she’d come right out and said it. “Once you bring me that book, I’ll acquire the same unfettered power as the Divine. The book outlines a ritual that will extract the ruby's power from its corporeal restraints, releasing it from Divine rules that deny us true power,” he said as he examined the seemingly insignificant ruby that he rolled in his fingers. “Now, be a good little priestess and fetch the book for me.”
“In another lifetime, we may have been friends, but until you tell us what you’re planning to do with this power once you’ve obtained it, we don’t go any further,” Kían said, taking an offensive stand in front of his mate.
Edward crossed his arms over his chest, a sinister smirk crossing his face. “As I see it, you have one of two options. You tell her to get me the book I need, and once I become the most powerful fae in history, I will bestow endless gifts on those who help me. Or… we can sit here and argue the finer points of morality. But beware, the longer you take, the more likely the bastard prince will soon discover my whereabouts. Now that I’ve returned to the fae realms, I cannot elude his magic. I may be mistaken, but I would suspect that you’d rather not call that kind of attention to your little piece of paradise. Go ahead. Take all the time you need. We all know that in the end, I’ll get what I want.”
My skin crawled at the vision of evil that had chased us out of Mag Mel. Amara’s eyes widened at the mere mention of his name. His reputation obviously preceded him.
“Amara, go and fetch him the book he is looking for,” Kían said stoically.
She stared at her mate, and a look of disgust creased her face. “You’re a fucking coward,” she said to him as she pushed up from the table. “You,” she pointed at me, “come with me. You’re my assurance that Kían will remain unharmed until we return.”
I followed close behind the priestess. Her petite form moving with speed and purpose, leading me to the lower levels of the library. The temperature dropped as we descended, and the dank smell of stagnant air grew stronger. Amara pressed her hand against a plate at each door we encountered in order to gain entrance. I had a feeling that I would never make it out of here alive if she decided to leave me behind.
“What have you gotten yourself into, girl?” she asked, shaking her head. And I knew that this might be my only opportunity to get the answers I needed. I could see through Edward’s deception. He’d never meant to help me with my visions. I was, and always had been, a pawn in his plan.
“I was told you could help me. You’re a priestess, right? Does that mean you have powers?”
She looked back at me with a raised eyebrow. “What does a human woman know of the Divine’s gifts?” she said as she entered through yet another door and led us into a small void of a room. She lifted her hand, and a glowing orb of light manifested over her outstretched palm. A clear testament that she did indeed possess magic. I followed her into a circular room, my eyes fixated on the orb of light. Once inside, the door behind us closed of its own accord, the impact stirring the dust from the shelves.
“Who are you?” she demanded.
“I’m no one. I’m just an insignificant human.”
“You’re not just a human. I wasn’t expecting it so soon, but could you be—” She hesitated for a moment and then reached for me. I let her curl her cool hands over my wrists.
Her touch hit me like a tempest, an otherworldly power slamming into me. This wasn’t like any vision I’d ever had. It was as if I was being split in two. As I pulled the future from her, she tore it from me with equal ferocity. It was a jumbled exchange, a whirlwind of overwhelming feelings I couldn’t piece together. Until a vision became crisp in my mind.
A forked path in the woods.
To the left, James stood alone. A hook, where his hand had been, glinted in the sunlight.
To the right was darkness. And there I crouched, keening over James’ lifeless body.
The vision erupted in smoke, and I saw her, the priestess, flickering in my consciousness as my power overturned hers, and a new vision appeared.
A field.
A growing storm.
Power and death.
A sacrifice.
A brunette girl— that girl !
Amara ripped her hands away from me, and we both doubled over as though we’d been struck. I stumbled away from her on shaky legs, desperately trying to catch my breath.
“What did you do to me?” I managed to get out.
“Me? You are not at all what you seem. You may not be the one I’ve been waiting for, but the Divine surely has a plan for you.”
“Who is she? I’ve seen that girl before. Who is she?” I demanded, desperate for more answers.
“She is a chosen, just like you. We all have our path. Now listen carefully, we don’t have much time. The Divine has made it all so clear.” She turned to the shelves and busied herself, looking through the books, a sense of urgency filling the small room.
“I’ve had a vision of James with that girl. But that cannot be his future. I am his future, not her. That’s why I came to you. I need answers.”
“Not all of us were fated for such a beautiful life. Some of us have a higher purpose.”
“No, it can’t be. For all the things that have happened to me, he is what made it all worth it. James is my gift.” My voice cracked as the emotions welled up inside me.
“I’m sorry, my child, but this was not meant to last forever. You’ve surely witnessed the signs? The very universe is conspiring to end one path and start you down the next. Be honest with yourself. You may love him, but you’ve already begun to see the fatal flaws in that love, haven’t you?”
The tears were flowing freely now as the truth became too clear to deny any longer. I sunk to my knees as the sobs turned into wails. The only protest I had was against an ending that I could not change. My heart was breaking, and there was nothing to do but allow the darkness to consume me.
“Katherine!” Amara said, wrapping her firm hands around my arms and pulling me to my feet. I heard the crack before I felt the sting of her hand against my cheek. The slap cut through the anguish that was drowning me. “Pull yourself together. You have a purpose. It may not be the way you envisioned it, but your life has meaning.”
“I don’t know if I can do it. I don’t think I can go on without him.” My chin trembled with the agony of it all and the fear of this unknown future I’d have to face alone.
“The female line is ever enduring. Even in our darkest hour, we find a way to go on, to do what we must. To persevere. Find solace in your resilience.” I couldn’t speak. I could only nod, even though I wasn’t sure I’d survive this. “Now listen to me carefully. I cannot stop éadbard from releasing the power of the ruby from its bonds. The Divine meticulously shaped the gemstone, embedding it with their power. Crafting it for the specific purpose of governing the magic within. These sacred rules are what maintain the delicate balance. If he should control such raw power with no constraints, it would spell out the demise of all the realms.” She stared at me intently, giving me a moment to let her words sink in. “I cannot stop him from siphoning off the power, but he needs me to perform the ritual. I can alter it to bind the power to someone else. I can tie the magic to a mortal soul. One that will keep it safe.”
“What? I don’t understand what you’re asking.”
“I’m telling you that you’ve been chosen to be the bearer of this power. To keep it safe from those who would abuse it.”
“But that’s not possible. It’s in the rules. The Heart of the Divine cannot be bound to any one person,” I countered, desperate for any way out of this.
“When the power contained in the ruby is released, the rules binding it will be broken. That is why it is so dangerous. It will have the ability to upend destinies. It must be protected. Do you understand?”
“Why can’t I be this guardian you need and still be with James? With that power, I could take away all the pain from this vendetta with Pan. We could live a happy life away from all of this.”
“It is not so. James and Peter are tightly woven into the fabric of fate. Their story must play out. Our very existence depends on it. It is no simple task the Divine has given you. You will be hunted for the power you possess. You must take it and go into hiding.”
“James will never let me leave. He loves me just as much as I love him. If our roles were reversed, I would never accept it,” I said defiantly, reaching for any way to unravel these chains that were constricting around me.
“You must make it happen. James has a role to play here in Neverland. His heartbreak is part of the story, a piece of the puzzle. You have seen what will happen to him if you choose the wrong path.”
I’d never felt so completely out of control in my entire life. A life that wasn’t even mine anymore. I could feel my love, my humanity, drain out of me, leaving nothing but an empty husk behind. Once, I’d thought that the worst thing that could happen to me was to be Edward’s property, but now I was a pawn in a much bigger game. My only salvation was to allow my heart to shrivel and die. It was devastatingly poetic. I would hold the power of the universe at my fingertips, yet I’d be completely powerless.