Chapter Sixteen
A my didn’t know what to do with herself and had taken to dusting everything in Faith’s house. Multiple times. Bookshelves and furniture and windowsills and little figurines that sat out on the coffee table.
Everything was spotless. It had already been spotless.
But that didn’t stop her from swapping out her rag for a clean one and starting all over again.
She heard Faith huff from the kitchen. Amy had already been explicitly told to sit down and relax. It’s not good to stress the baby like this .
Honestly, Amy figured her baby would understand. This was an impossible situation and the only way to keep her nerves in check was to keep her hands busy.
Tru had texted her earlier in the day to let her know that he was jumping on a flight to Billings. He texted her again when he landed and sent her a picture of the rental car he’d ordered. It was some fancy thing that had no business being in Tenacity.
Worst of all, that car would bring him right to Amy. And wasn’t that a horrible thought.
Her anxiety had been multiplying all afternoon, and she could feel the uneven, uneasy trembling of her heart against her ribs. It didn’t even beat, it just shook.
But why was she nervous? She already knew about the baby. She’d already been sitting with this news for a day, playing out what her future might look like over and over. Sometimes the murky figure by her side looked like Tru. Sometimes it looked like Josh, and her heart gave a little leap of joy. Then again, sometimes it looked like neither of them, and she’d quickly found herself accepting that as a possible reality.
So it was Tru who should be nervous. He should have paused to question why an ex was reaching out to him after all this time.
Though she doubted it even crossed his mind. If things had already soured with his wife, then Tru was probably just looking to slide back into his life pre-marriage. And that meant rekindling his former romances. Amy had come to terms with a lot these past few months, and she was under no delusions about Tru. He wasn’t ever the man she thought he was. The kindness and sweetness had all been an illusion. In reality, he was an oily, slippery snake, and she had to remember that. Because while he was out there, whispering all the right words in her ear, jetting her off to private islands, there were how many other women in his contacts?
Her gaze drifted to the clock on the wall as the hour ticked down. Billings wasn’t that far from Tenacity. Tru would be here anytime now. She dusted with more vigor until she heard the unfamiliar rev of an engine. Then everything inside her seized up like ice.
“Is that him making all that racket?” Faith asked, hurrying down the hall to peek out the curtains. Wisps of hair pulled free from her braid as she stealthily took in the view. “What the hell kind of car is that?”
Amy joined her at the window, watching the car recklessly race down the street. How had she ever found him impressive?
“Looks like a Porsche,” Caleb said, peeking over Faith’s shoulder.
“He’s gonna hit one cow pie and end up spinning off into a ditch.”
“And we will not be here to see it,” Caleb said. “Because this is the first day off we’ve had together in forever and we have a date.”
“We do.” Faith glanced over at Amy. “Are you gonna be okay without us?”
Amy smiled a bit. “Of course. You two go have fun. This is something I have to do on my own.”
“You got this,” Caleb told her. “Remember. His last movie only has a thirty-three percent audience rating on Rotten Tomatoes.”
She did have this. Right? Amy watched Tru get out of his car, slipping a finely made cowboy hat on his head. He dripped in finery. His leather boots gleamed and the belt buckle at his waist sparkled in the sun. It probably cost as much as that souped-up car he’d rented.
“I can’t believe that’s my baby’s father,” Amy muttered to herself. She should have known better. She’d met her fair share of men like him on the circuit, and now she felt like an idiot for not seeing him plainly. Maybe she’d just been so desperate for it to be real.
That thought touched something in her. She’d never said that out loud, but the truth was she was getting older and the little flings on the road hadn’t felt right anymore. She’d wanted something stable and real. She’d wanted someone to want her the way she thought Tru had wanted her. When that fell apart, Amy didn’t think she’d ever put herself out there again, and that’s when Josh had stumbled into her life. She hadn’t been expecting him. But he was everything that Tru wasn’t—stable, real, and he wanted her. Or, at least, he had. It didn’t really matter either way, because here Tru came to ruin it all over again.
Amy buzzed her lips together. “Better go get this over with.” She slipped on her shoes, stepping out onto the porch.
Her hand danced over her lower belly quickly. Here goes nothing, baby. Actually, here goes everything.
Tru lifted his hand in greeting and flashed her a brilliant smile.
She couldn’t believe she’d ever swooned over that smile. Though she’d grown quite partial to another smile lately. A closed-mouth smile with just a hint of mischief, lips curling at the edges. Eyes creased and twinkling. Every part of her wished it were Josh walking up the driveway toward her because this felt like a certain kind of nightmare. Amy never imagined seeing Tru again outside of a billboard or TV spot, and she’d certainly never envisioned him waltzing through tiny Tenacity. Her stomach flipped uncomfortably.
“Hey there, Hawkins,” Tru called. He’d always called her Hawkins with affection. Or maybe she’d only thought it was affection and he was using it to keep some semblance of polite distance between them.
“Hey,” Amy called, shifting from one foot to the other. She folded her arms across her chest to keep the nerves from unraveling. “You made good time.”
“I didn’t want to hang out in Billings too long. Once word gets out that I’m around it’s gonna be nonstop pictures and autographs.” He waved off the thought. “You know how it is.”
“Right,” she said. She did know how that was. Not to the same degree as Tru, of course. But that part of her life also felt so far away. Like it belonged to a different Amy. An Amy that hadn’t started to build a life in Tenacity.
“Besides, the only person I really wanted to see was here. So I might have been a little heavy on the gas pedal.”
Amy tried to smile but it didn’t come out right. Tru might wish that he’d taken his time when he found out what she had to say. Her hand fell to her stomach again. Just a momentary brush. She’d been doing that a lot since yesterday, suddenly conscious of this tiny life she had growing inside her.
Tru surged up the steps toward her, and before Amy had even opened her mouth to ask him to sit down, he’d swept her up into his arms. Amy’s skin crawled. It felt wrong. These arms. They didn’t belong to the right person. But suddenly Tru was kissing her, and Amy’s thoughts were ringing like alarms in her head.
Her eyes widened as she forced her head back. She hadn’t been expecting this kind of reception.
Tru must not have noticed the look of utter shock on her face because he was too busy hugging her, whispering words into her neck. “It’s so good to see you.” His breath tickled her ear and she shivered. Not the good kind of shiver. The warning bells kept ringing. This wasn’t going the way she’d planned. “I’ve missed you, Amy. So, so much.”
She wriggled out of his arms. Delicately. Trying not to hurt him despite the way he’d treated her. She knew the kind of shock this was about to be. “Tru—”
“I know. I know, ” he said, shaking his head and dropping his hands to his hips. “What right do I have to swoop in here like this? To kiss you like this? I know what you must be thinking and what you’re going to say to me now, but I beg you to hear me out.” He snatched up her hands, squeezing them. Running his thumbs over her knuckles. “The marriage. It was wrong. I knew it was wrong the moment it happened. That the only person I wanted to be with was you. I knew we were making a huge mistake. I was making a huge mistake. I just didn’t know how to stop what I’d started. I didn’t want anyone to get hurt, but I was a coward, calling that love when I knew it wasn’t.” He blinked at her, those big blue eyes like shimmery pools of deceit. Oh, he was good. Too bad she’d watched him do this act on the big screen. “Will you ever forgive me? Could you ever?”
“Tru, I—”
He wrapped his hands around her shoulders, pulling her close again, running his hands up and down her back. “I want us to be together, Amy. More than anything.”
Amy hesitated, overwhelmed by everything. All she could think about was Josh and the way he touched her, held her. His smile. The way he laughed. The way he made her feel . But this was a scenario she’d never considered when she’d called Tru. A few months ago, she might have been overjoyed at Tru’s declaration, but that was before Josh, before she’d really thought about who Tru was and what she deserved. Now, Josh was the only one consuming her thoughts. Still, if her baby’s father wanted to make this work, shouldn’t she want to try something ? Shouldn’t they want to be at least cordial for this little life they’d created? She took a step back, breaking out of his hold again. She needed space to think.
Actually, she needed a stiff drink.
But that was a no-go for the foreseeable future.
“What do you say?” Tru said. “Forgive me?” He smiled that smile that made women across the country pull their hair out screaming. The same smile that had once had her desperate for his attention. Now it didn’t even set her heart racing.
“Tru,” she started again. “Before you make any big decisions or big declarations, there’s something you should know.” He beamed at her, nodding. “I’m pregnant and it’s yours. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I just found out myself.”
That beaming smile dropped from his face. “You’re… What?” he said, the corner of his mouth twitching like he expected her to shout “gotcha.”
“I’m pregnant,” Amy repeated, letting the words sink in.
Tru’s face fell further and further. The shock ended in a frown, his brow pinched. He looked like she’d just hit him over the head with a skillet. Guess he wasn’t as good of an actor as he thought. He turned pale and started stammering about dates and condoms and how could this have happened? Then he quieted, rubbing at the scruff on his jaw. “You say you’re pregnant, but how do I really even know it’s mine? I mean, it’s been months since we were together.”
Amy sucked in a sharp breath. This was not the response she was hoping for. Frankly, she didn’t know what she’d been hoping for. But it did clarify things in her mind. “I will try not to take offense at the accusation that I might have been sleeping around while I was with you.”
“That’s not what I—”
“It is what you meant,” Amy said pointedly. He didn’t argue. “Anyway, I will gladly submit to a paternity test, if this is something you want, Tru. But from the look on your face, it’s obvious that you don’t want this child. And if you don’t want this child, then you don’t really want me either.” She didn’t think he ever did. She was just some pretty thing to warm his bed.
“Look, Amy, I could…” Tru swallowed hard. He glanced around, like someone might overhear them at any moment. “…give you the money.”
“Money for what?”
“To take care of it.”
Wow . She’d considered the reality that Tru wanted nothing to do with this baby, but she never thought he’d ask her to ‘take care of it’.
“That won’t be necessary,” Amy said calmly, knowing he wasn’t referring to child support.
“Listen, I—”
Amy put her hand up, interrupting him. “I will not hold you responsible for a child you want no part of,” she said. “If that’s what’s really worrying you. I won’t blow up your life and your career. But I also won’t ‘take care of the problem’ the way you’re suggesting.” The moment she’d realized she was pregnant, she knew deep down that wouldn’t be an option she was taking. She’d always wanted to start her own family, whether biologically or through adoption. She also had enough financial resources to care for a child. She didn’t need Tru or his fame or his money. She would have this baby on her own and she would love it enough for both of them.
“Come on, Amy. Think about how much fun we could have together. I’m not ready to be a father right now.”
Amy arched her brow. That much was obvious.
“Are you really ready to be a mother?”
His question didn’t make her panic the way she thought it might. She knew next to nothing about having a baby or raising a child, but it didn’t fill her with fear. There were definitely nerves and excitement and a little anxiousness. Was she ready? Was she prepared? No. But she would be ready when the time came.
“Think about it,” Tru said, taking her hand and painting a picture of the life they might have. “You could travel with me.” He tucked her hair behind her ear. “And I could treat you to the finest things.”
Only until he found someone new. He was probably just waiting for the ink to dry on the divorce papers. Amy wanted more for herself. More for her child. And she definitely wanted better than Tru McCoy. She looked up at him and sighed. “I think it’s probably time for you to go, Tru.”
He nodded once, turned from her, looked back, then set off down the porch steps. He didn’t even bother to argue with her and perhaps that was the most telling of all. She was never anything to him, just a good time.
He walked down the drive to his rented car and swung the door open. He looked up at her one more time. “Call me if you change your mind.”
“I won’t,” she said. “I promise.”
Tru climbed into his rental.
Amy watched him pull down the street. In a way, she supposed she owed Tru a debt of gratitude. He had given her the gift of clarity.
She pulled out her phone and called Josh. He didn’t pick up.
She ended the call, wondering if she’d lost two men in one day.
One thing was certain: she was going to have this baby. Regardless of whether she had anyone by her side to help raise it.