Chapter 20
TWENTY
HARLEY
Mixed emotions war within me as I stumble into the backyard and plop down on the ground to stare up at the sky.
I was right about being able to see stars here in Blackwater, but now when I look at them, I don’t see the peace I used to when I was younger.
Now, all I see is her.
I see her lying next to me in the sand as I opened up to her. I see her shining eyes and small smiles.
And tonight, it’s even worse, because I did the one thing I promised myself I would never do.
I took something that wasn’t mine to take.
I squeeze my eyes shut, but all that does is make the image of tonight flash in my mind. Savannah pressed against the brick as I pummeled into her, her whines and whimpers a constant soundtrack in my mind.
Fuck, fuck, fuck!
So many feelings fill me, and I don’t know which one of them is worse.
Elation.
Pleasure.
Need.
Satisfaction.
Anger.
Sadness.
Guilt.
Disgust.
Whether I’m disgusted at myself for taking Savannah the way I did without remorse or because I fucked the girl who stabbed me in the back, I don’t know.
But what I do know is that I’m not going to be able to stop myself from doing it again.
I can’t, because Savannah Marks is in my veins, and I feel like I need her now more than ever.