Chapter 9
Chapter Nine
Sloan
Present
My heart breaks for Sutton and the all-consuming grief she’s feeling at the loss of her grandmother. It’s coming off of her in waves. I feel like a voyeur watching the love pouring out of everyone for Sutton. I’ve never felt a love like that before.
Even though the tension is thick right now with everything going on, Beck still showed up for Sutton today. Putting his own anger aside and putting their friendship first.
August’s sole focus has been on Sutton. Just standing by her side as she feels every ounce of her grief, remaining an anchor for her.
Quinn is unwavering in her loyalty to Sutton but still a spitfire, keeping both men in line. Every day she reminds me more and more of my two best friends I left behind.
It makes me miss Kailey and Maria that much more.
I rub my chest to try to relieve my own aching heart.
They really were all I had prior to meeting James, but our friendship became stilted partly because of him, but also because I let him control who I could and couldn’t spend time with to keep the peace.
At first, it started with weekend girls’ nights decreasing. Eventually I was only ever able to see them at work. I could tell they were starting to get suspicious of James and I’m pretty sure he knew. And that’s why my schedule started changing.
They justified these changes and said it was the honeymoon phase. It was normal to miss a few girls’ nights, until I was missing all of them to avoid an argument or worse with James.
They were fine with it at first when they thought it was new love and were living vicariously through me. Kailey and Maria loved seeing the white roses and gifts he’d leave on my desk with the cutest notes. They wanted to hear everything about our dates.
They knew James and I were spending so much time together, so we could try to get to know one another.
How we were unable to keep our hands off of one another.
He was definitely handsy, even at work; which made me uncomfortable.
But I’d let it slide because he promised me no one would say anything because of who he was.
I was na?ve.
And of course no one would say a word about James. But that wasn’t the case for me.
The rumors were that I was a gold digger. I took advantage of him for being a vulnerable widow. Just a pretty young thing he’d eventually get tired of and toss aside for the next pretty nurse who came waltzing in.
It got to the point where people believed I only had a job there because of James. That there was no way I got accepted into the master’s program at Harvard on my own. It was all because I was with him. Not because I was actually intelligent and worked my ass off to get into that program.
Everything I did was dimmed because everyone at work started thinking I was getting handouts because of him. Not that I had actually been on the road to success on my own before even meeting him.
The sound of the car door shutting brings me back to reality.
“You ready to head back, Sloan?” August asks quietly.
I nod and start to walk toward the car.
“Everything okay?” Quinn eyes me suspiciously.
“Yeah… Yeah, I’m okay. Just feel for Sutton,” I start to say. “And for August too,” I whisper to Quinn.
Watching August get in the back seat of Quinn’s car, after he opened the driver and passenger side doors for us first. I smile softly to myself, at his silent strength and love.
August is larger than life on stage but off the stage he’s such a calm, quiet, gentle man. Nothing at all like I’m used to.
“My heart aches for Sutton and August. August really loves her. Sut deserves a love like his and August deserves a love like hers. But her grandmother was everything to her and she isn’t going to be ready to go back on stage or on tour while she’s grieving.
If they’re meant to be, like I believe they are, they’ll find their way back to each other,” Quinn says somberly.
“I hope so. For them,” I sigh.
Quinn stretches out her hand over the center console with her palm up toward me. “Let’s go check on our girl.”
I stare at her hand for just a couple seconds before weaving my fingers through hers. “Let’s.” I give her the slightest smile. The tension in my chest releasing just the slightest bit at the feeling of maybe having a really great friend again.
If only I wasn’t keeping so many secrets.