Chapter 52
Robyn
Three weeks later…
I draw a line through the last item on my to-do list and sit back in my chair, feeling accomplished.
For the first time since I took this role, my admin is under control. My inbox has everything ticked as read. My reports are filed. My staff reviews are complete. My budget submissions are in. Even the maintenance request I’ve been putting off for months has been submitted and actioned.
I’m on top of it.
It feels wonderful not to be chasing my tail the whole time.
There is a knock at the door, and Carla puts her head around the jamb. “I’m about to leave for the day. Do you want to walk out together?”
“I can’t, I’m afraid. I’m headed to the main hospital ward for an evening shift.” I smile.
She frowns. “Did you eat lunch?”
“Don’t start up on me. Yes, I ate.” I wave a hand at her.
“At your desk again, I’m sure?”
I shrug. “So what if I ate at my desk? At least I’m on top of all my admin. You should be proud of me.”
Carla comes in and pulls the door shut behind her. She sits down across from me, bag in her lap, jacket folded over the arm of the chair.
I look at her. “What’s wrong? Did you need to talk about something? Please don’t tell me you’re resigning.” I widen my eyes, my heart racing.
“What? No. Of course not. You couldn’t get rid of me if you tried.”
I heave out a sigh and smile.
“You had me worried.” I look at my watch, “I need to get over to the hospital.”
She gives me a look. Then she says, “I’m worried that you’re working too hard.”
“I am not, so you don’t have to worry.” I give a one-shouldered shrug.
“I’m concerned about you, Robyn.” She cocks her head, looking at me. “If you’re not pulling double shifts, you’re at home working on your admin. You’re not eating properly or sleeping enough.”
“Of course I am.” I snort-laugh. “You’re concerned over nothing. I’m all caught up now, so I’ll start to slow down.”
“Why don’t I believe you?”
“It’s true. Things have slowed down around here since the peace treaty was signed between the two islands. Sure, I’m taking shifts at the general shifter hospital, but it’s only to ensure that I don’t lose my edge.”
“That’s my point exactly. You shouldn’t have to work so hard anymore. I worry.”
“Well, don’t. I plan on taking a break now before the borders between the islands are opened.”
“Do you promise you will?” she asks.
“Yes, of course,” I tell her, meaning it. “It’s just that we need to be ready, so I might implement a couple of changes. Then I’ll relax.”
“I’m worried that you’re trying to run away from yourself. Away from your feelings.”
I laugh. “No. You have it all wrong. You can relax already and stop lecturing me. I’m absolutely fine.”
“Are you sure you’re not still in love with him? That all of this is not about him?”
I let out a breath and level her with a stare because that came out of nowhere. “I thought we weren’t going to bring Ridge up. We agreed that it was done and over.”
“I’m changing my mind.”
“Carla—”
“You’re not over him.”
“I am,” I say with conviction.
“You said you were falling for him. That doesn’t just disappear.”
“You’re the one who told me it was impossible to fall in love in a handful of days,” I tell her. “You were right, and I was wrong.”
“I said that before I watched you go through what you went through.” Her voice is gentler now. “You look like you’re struggling with the breakup.”
“What breakup? We weren’t even together. Let’s drop this, please.” I implore her with my eyes.
“I want to drop it, but I’m struggling to believe that you don’t still have feelings for the guy.”
“Well, I don’t. I don’t need lying, cheating bastards in my life. It’s as simple as that.”
“Ridge is not Bruce, hon’. You seem to be forgetting that.”
“I know he’s not Bruce.” I snort.
“Do you? Because what happened with your ex is not related. You fell for Ridge, and now you don’t want to admit it. You’re choosing to ignore it and work instead of letting yourself think on it and process it.”
“You have it all wrong, Carla. I swear it. I will admit that I got addicted for a while there,” I say. “Addicted to his dick and all the orgasms he gave me. Not to him. There’s a big difference.”
“I think you’re lying, and I think you know it.”
“I’m not lying.” I sound frustrated. “I’m done with Ridge. Can we please leave it there? I need to get changed into my scrubs.”
Carla doesn’t move.
“If you need to talk—” she starts.
“I don’t,” I tell her. “And I mean that in the nicest possible way. I’m fine, Carla.
I am genuinely, honestly fine. I’m not lying to you or to myself.
My biggest worry right now has nothing to do with Ridge.
It’s about the clinics and all the restructuring.
They’re all closing down, and I can’t absorb all of the staff.
I’m going to have to make decisions I’m not looking forward to making.
” I press my lips together. “I’m losing sleep over that. Not over him.” I look at her.
Then she says, “I’m here if you need me. I’ll help you with all of it.”
“Have I told you lately how wonderful you are?” I ask.
“Not enough.” A grin spreads across her face. “As long as you’re sure.”
“I’m very sure.” I mean it. Carla is being silly.
“All I ask is that you think about what we spoke about. That you give yourself an inch to breathe and that you think on it. You need a minute, Robyn.”
“I will.”
She takes my hand and squeezes it, and then I’m jogging to my bathroom to get changed into my scrubs.