Chapter 17 #2
A couple of weeks had gone by since the unfortunate shellfish incident.
While their arrangement was technically over, everything still felt exactly the same as it did before, which left Sarah with more questions than answers, but she was too tired after the events of the last few weeks to dig any deeper.
Nell motioned to the front porch as if it were self-explanatory. “No one should be alone on their birthday.”
Sarah blinked, then smiled. “I wasn’t going to be alone for my birthday. I have plans.”
“Oh, really? Plans? You didn’t mention anything when we talked yesterday,” Nell said dryly.
“Neither did you, and look, here you are.” She smirked. “Yes, I have birthday plans . . . with my couch, and some Thai takeout, maybe a little bourbon, and Mamma Mia!”
“Ah, I see. Party for one.” Nell kept smiling at her like she was missing the joke. “Do you think maybe there’s room for it to be a party for two?”
Sarah considered for a split second, her smile already pulling at the corner of her mouth. “I always have room in my life for you, Nell.”
Sarah held out her hand. Nell took it without a second thought, and Sarah led her inside.
They each removed their shoes, and Sarah placed the box with Jamie’s gift on the small table next to the door. When she turned around, Nell was already halfway down the hall, taking in the wall of family photos that hung neatly in front of her. Sarah watched closely.
It was odd seeing Nell here, in her home. Up until a few weeks ago, their entire arrangement had existed solely in Nell’s spaces. And now, here she was, sock-footed in Sarah’s entryway, looking at her family photos. It made Sarah suddenly self-conscious.
She rubbed her hands down the sides of her leggings. “I know it’s not quite as grand as any of your houses,” she said softly.
Nell turned from the photo she had been looking at—one of Sarah, Beth, and Lily from a family trip they had taken to Nantucket when Lily was three years old. “Oh, shut up,” Nell said, with a small smile.
“Did you just tell me to shut up?” Sarah crossed her arms over her chest.
Nell reached out, the brush of her hand against Sarah’s forearm a welcome comfort.
“I did. You know why?”
“Why?”
“Because your home? Your home will always be better than any of mine.”
Sarah tilted her head, perplexed by Nell’s response.
“It feels like love lives here. I felt it as soon as I walked in.” She turned back to look at the photos on the wall.
Photos of Sarah, Lily, Beth, Kelly; even Wren and Jamie had made it onto the wall.
Memories of her favorite people, forever frozen in time.
“What’s a girl got to do to get her photo on the wall? ” she asked quietly.
Sarah’s heart gave a contented ache. She knew they needed to talk more about where things stood with them, but Nell was here, showing up for her, and that was all that mattered right now.
She slid her arm around Nell’s waist, bumping her hip against her.
“Stick around a while, and I think there’s a pretty decent chance you’ll end up here, too. ”
Nell turned toward her. Folding her body against hers, nuzzling her face into the crook of Sarah’s neck. Sarah wrapped her arms tighter around Nell.
“I missed you,” Nell murmured, so faintly Sarah almost didn’t catch it.
“It’s only been a few weeks since I saw you,” she pointed out.
“I know, but it was still too long.”
“Well, I think we can easily fix that in the future.”
“I like that idea.” Nell pulled back. “Oh, I have something for you!”
Nell went back into the foyer, and after a moment of rummaging through her purse, she pulled out a red square box tied with a black satin bow.
Sarah shot her a questioning look. “You didn’t have to get me anything,” she tried to say, but Nell gently pressed the box into her hands.
“It’s your birthday, Sarah. You deserve to be spoiled. Now, open it, please.”
Nell watched her excitedly as Sarah pulled at the ribbon, sliding it off, and opened the lid.
A sleek, gold watch was positioned on a black velvet pillow. Diamonds circled the rectangular watch face, and as she ran a finger over the cool metal surface, she could only imagine how much something like this had cost.
“Turn it over,” Nell said, grinning.
Sarah delicately removed the watch from its perch, flipping it over in her hands. Etched on the back of the watch face was a singular letter—a lowercase l.
“I love you with a lowercase l, Sarah Gallagher.”
Sarah looked at the watch, at the inscription, and then at Nell. For the first time in her life, she was at a loss for words.
“I wanted to get you something classic, something worthy of who you are, and this felt like the perfect piece,” Nell said, taking the watch from her and pulling Sarah’s hand toward her.
A glint of gold caught the light as Nell’s own watch sat delicately around her wrist. “It’s similar to mine, but just a little different. Just like us.”
The cool surface of the watchband made contact with her skin as Nell’s fingers worked the clasp, setting the watch in place. She looked down at her hand still in Nell’s, an overwhelming surge of deep appreciation rising within her.
“Every time I look at my watch, I think of where I want to be next. More recently, when I ask myself that question, the answer is with you. You get me in ways I’m still learning to understand, and you leave space for me to be myself, without having to box up parts of me to appease others.
I wanted to get you something to show you how much I value those parts of you. ”
Sarah didn’t realize tears had begun to form in her eyes until Nell reached toward her, wiping one away with the pad of her thumb.
“Look at me. I’m ridiculous, crying like this,” Sarah whispered, turning her head to wipe at her eyes.
“No part of you is ridiculous. You’re perfect, exactly as you are. You’ve taught me that.” Nell cupped her cheek in her delicate hands. Sarah leaned into the touch as Nell held the moment a bit longer. “Now, you said something about Thai food and Mamma Mia!?”
Sarah choked out a laugh. “Yeah, I did.”
A short while later, they settled into the overstuffed couch in Sarah’s family room. Takeout containers from her favorite Thai place in town were scattered across the coffee table, Nell reaching for a container of Pad Thai as Sarah flicked on the TV.
“Who watches Mother Goth?” Nell asked, seeing the recently watched YouTube videos that both Lily and Wren obsessed over weekly.
“Wait a minute,” Sarah asked slowly. “You’re familiar with Mother Goth? The streamer who makes all that content about the Sims and builds mansions in a bedazzled cat mask? How on earth do you know who she is?”
“You seem pretty familiar with her, too,” Nell pointed out.
“Only because Lily and Wren watch her videos religiously, and, as a parent, I make sure to familiarize myself with the types of digital content my kid consumes. It’s a little weird, if you ask me. I don’t fully understand why the girls like watching someone else play a video game.”
With a few clicks of the remote, Sarah pulled up Mamma Mia!
“I can see the appeal,” Nell said thoughtfully, taking a bite of her food, “especially if someone is really into the game. Plus, the added opportunity for that creator to monetize their platform? Don’t knock nontraditional ways of making money.”
“I didn’t know this was a passion of yours,” Sarah teased, as she hit play on the movie.
“You want to talk about hidden passions? When were you going to tell me you’re a huge ABBA fan?” Nell nudged her foot against Sarah’s thigh playfully as she settled back into the couch.
“You’re not? Everyone loves ABBA.”
“I’m impartial at best,” Nell deadpanned.
“C’mon! No one goes harder for ‘Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! (A Man After Midnight)’ than the lesbians.”
“If you say so . . .”
The opening song began to play, and Nell groaned. Sarah smiled because, little known to Nell, she was about to turn this movie night into a sing-along just for her.
For someone who claimed not to be a fan, Nell knew all the words to every song as the two of them belted their hearts out, breathless and barefoot and laughing in her family room, as they jumped around acting out each musical number, and when it was over—when the movie had ended and they had cleaned up the takeout containers—Sarah couldn’t help the smile she wore. This had been her best birthday ever.