Chapter 32
THIRTY-TWO
I’m sitting in the tunnel talking with Elias trying to calm my nerves. The competition starts in just a few minutes. I’m not set to skate until later this afternoon, but with everything going on, I’m a jittery mess.
“I’m back in the good ole USA.” He tilts the phone to show me his new weight room. He and Taylor are training at her home gym in South Dakota for the next month.
“Too bad her home gym wasn’t in Arizona. You’re so close.”
He snorts. “Just a twenty-four-hour drive. I checked. Looked at flights too but our training is crazy. And it’s a two hour drive just to the airport. There isn’t even a McDonald’s in this town.”
“Oh man, you really are roughing it,” I tease.
“So… the doctor cleared you for today?” he asks.
“Yeah, once I told him I’d taken out all the difficult jumps, he and coach were both good with it. I’ve been feeling stronger every day.”
“Was changing the routine your idea?”
“Yeah. It isn’t worth the risk for a showcase event.”
He grins. “Look at you, growing and shit.”
I roll my eyes, but I guess he’s right. A few months ago, I would have been tempted to push through even when I knew my body was weak. My phone pings with a text from my sister telling me they’re walking in the building.
“I gotta go. My family is here.”
“Hey, wait.” His face gets closer to the screen. “Forget about everything going on with Rufus. Today is your day to shine.”
My chest aches at the mention of Rhett.
“Kill it.” He makes a cross over his heart and I mimic. “Good luck.”
“I never understood why you two do that.” A deep voice echoes in the quiet hallway as I end the call.
“Rhett.” I scramble to my feet and hug him. I wasn’t sure he’d come and wasn’t sure how I’d feel about it if he did. I want to be angry that he ran last night, but I’m too happy to see him.
“Hey, angel.” He wraps me in his arms and smooths a hand down the back of my head.
“I wasn’t sure you were still coming.” I tilt my face up to him and he places a kiss on my forehead.
“I’m sorry about last night, but I wouldn’t miss it. You’ve got a whole fan club out there. Dakota and Reagan even brought signs.”
I smile. I knew Dakota and Reagan were planning to come, but hearing it confirmed makes my heart squeeze.
“I’m so glad you’re here. Today is going to be amazing. By the way, how do you feel about Italian for dinner? My dad has his heart set on some restaurant he saw driving through town.”
He smiles. “About that...”
“Too much? Do you not want to hang out with my family?”
“It isn’t that.” He blows out a breath. “I’m leaving Valley, Sienna.”
“What do you mean? For the night or… the weekend?”
“For… I don’t know. School is almost done. I talked to my advisor this morning and he said I could finish my classes online and still graduate next month. I’m flying out this afternoon.”
All the air is knocked from my lungs. “I don’t understand. Can’t you wait one more month to finish out the school year?”
“I need to go home and deal with my shit. It isn’t fair for me to keep clinging to you like a life raft. I’ll take us both down if I keep going this way.”
“I want to be your life raft or at least your arm floaties.”
I get a small smile but can tell he’s already decided he’s leaving, and I can’t stop him.
“What about us?”
“I hope you can understand, but I get it if you can’t. The last thing I want is to hurt you or bring more stress on your life.”
“I’m stronger than you think.” My phone pings again. “My family is waiting for me. Do you still want to meet them?”
“If you still want me to, yeah. I’d love to.”
My family adores Rhett. No surprise there. My sister grins so big when he asks her about her team’s hockey season, and seeing my sister so excited wins over my mom. My dad is the last one to crumble, but when he finds out Rhett is from Minnesota, my dad welcomes him like a fellow neighbor.
“I have to go get ready and warm up. I’ll see you guys after the competition.” I get hugs from all of my family members, and then Rhett walks with me toward the locker room.
“Will I see you after?”
“My flight is at four.”
So, no.
“Will I hear from you?”
“Yeah.” He hugs me. “My phone is destroyed so it might take a few days to get a new one.”
“Okay.”
His mouth covers mine and I live in the seconds before he pulls away. “Later, angel.”
With a broken heart, I walk into the locker room. Josie is sitting on the bench lacing her skates.
“Hey.” Her face falls when she gets a good look at me. “What’s wrong?”
Instead of answering, I sit next to her and lean my head on her shoulder. “Life isn’t fair.”
“No, it definitely isn’t. Anything I can do? Do I need to dick punch someone to even the karma scales?”
My laugh is short and clipped. “No, sadly it doesn’t have a revenge solution.”
“Pity.” She smiles. “Skate it out?”
“Absolutely.”
And that’s what I do. Those moments just before I skate always go by in a blur. Music, applause, the chill in the air. It isn’t until my name is called that I snap to attention. I take the ice and I skate for Rhett. I skate for my family.
But most of all, I skate for me.
Spending time with my family is nice, but my mind continually returns to Rhett. I replay the past week wondering if there are things I could have done differently to have changed the outcome.
They don’t ask why Rhett doesn’t come with us, but my sister notices I’m not my usual self.
“Do you still want to go out later? If you’re not up for it—”
“Of course.” I force some enthusiasm into my smile. “Rhett’s roommates are having people over and we can crash in his room.”
“Okay.” She squeals.
“But, no drinking. I promised mom and dad.”
Allison rolls her eyes. “I don’t drink. Beer is gross.”
It’s a chill night at the apartment. Some of the hockey team is over playing Xbox and the rest of us are sitting outside on the deck.
Allison is quiet, but the giant grin on her face hasn’t faltered since we walked in.
Maverick, who miraculously still has his shirt on, sits next to me and throws an arm over my shoulder.
“It’s weird, right? Rhett not being here.”
“Very,” I admit.
“He’ll be back. He has to come back.”
“I don’t know. There’s only a few weeks of school left.”
“Yeah, but you two are in love. He won’t be able to stay away for that long.”
I feel my face heat and I look down to my lap.
“You are in love, yeah?” Mav drops his arm. “Please tell me you didn’t drop kick the poor bastard’s heart on his way out the door.”
“No, of course not. It’s just… I haven’t told him that I love him.”
“Oh. Well, fuck.” He backtracks when I shoot him a panicked look. “I’m sure he knows how you feel.”
I want to kick myself. “I should have told him. Now I may never get a chance.”
“Cheer up. You’ll get your chance. I know it.” He stands. “Allie, you look like a ringer. Wanna be on my team for washers?”
My sister nods enthusiastically, not even bothering to correct the shortening of her name which she usually hates. “Sure.”
The next morning, I say goodbye to my family outside of my dorm.
“We’ll see you in a month for graduation,” my dad says, hugging me. “Try not to flunk out before then.”
“Funny.”
My mom always tears up when we say goodbye and this time is no different. “Love you, mom. I’ll talk to you soon.”
“I made up your old bedroom in case you want to stay with us after graduation while you get settled into the new job.”
“Thank you. I’ll think about it.” I’ve given such little thought to the job. I haven’t even looked at apartments. It doesn’t seem nearly as important as everything else going on.
“Thank you for letting me tag along last night,” Allison says when it’s finally her turn. “Will you give Maverick my number?”
“Definitely not.”
She smiles. “Bye, S.”
I’ve barely gotten back to my room and crawled into bed where I fully intend to spend the day feeling sorry for myself when there’s a knock at the door. My stupid, hopeful heart convinces me that it’s Rhett.
It’s another hockey player standing outside with coffee. “Mav?”
“Gooooood morning. Coffee?” He extends the cup in his left hand. “It’s decaf.”
“What are you doing here?”
“I thought about it all night and I decided we should do it.”
“Do what?”
“Make the big gesture.”
I take a sip of the coffee while I give my brain a chance to work through the puzzle that is Maverick. “What?”
“We’re going to drive to Minnesota and you’re going to make the big gesture.”
“That sounds…”
“Awesome,” he says as I say, “Like a terrible idea.”
“Come on. I live for this shit. The look on his face will be worth the two-day drive.”
“I can’t ask him to come back.”
“Then don’t, but you have to tell him how you feel.”
I can’t believe I’m considering it.
“Minnie-soda bound?” He asks, dancing in place.