26. Chapter 26
Mackenzie
M y stomach swirls with anticipation. I’m nervous but also excited to see Tal again. We didn’t get to talk much this summer, save for a few messages when he was home for a weekend in July.
I’ve missed him terribly.
I feel pathetic for it, but my life’s not the same without seeing Tal’s smiling face all the time.
As I wait by the bus stop, I see his familiar head of blonde hair in the distance, and butterflies erupt in my stomach. He’s tan from all the time spent in the sun, and his hair looks lighter.
When he glances up from the ground and sees me, I lift my hand in an enthusiastic wave. He returns it, but his smile doesn't reach his eyes.
Is he not excited to see me?
As he crosses the street, I stay rooted in place, not wanting to come off as too eager .
When he’s standing right in front of me, he hesitates for just a second before finally wrapping his arms around me in a hug.
I feel his sigh of relief, and he can probably feel mine.
“I missed you so much, Firefly. You look beautiful,” he murmurs against my hairline.
“I missed you, too. Thank you.” My cheeks flush. I’m not wearing anything special. Just a pair of turquoise skinny jeans and a plain black babydoll top.
He steps back as the bus approaches, and we don’t talk as we get on and take a seat next to each other.
“How was your summer? How are the twins?” he asks, sliding his hand on the seat between our bodies with his palm facing up.
I take the invitation and waffle our fingers together. The familiar spark of electricity that sizzled between us before the summer is still there, and my anxiety settles.
“They’re good. They’re getting sassier by the day. Summer was a little boring. Vocal performance camp was fun, I got a solo during the showcase.”
Tal squeezes my hand. “That’s awesome, Firefly. I’m so proud of you.”
“Thank you.” I squeeze his hand. “How was Scout camp?”
“It was alright. You know, a lot of boys being boys. I earned my watersports badge, though, so that's fun.”
I don’t know anything about Boy Scout badges or what it takes to earn them, so I don’t know what to say other than, “That’s cool. Did you get your schedule?”
“Yeah, I got it when I went to get my ID last week. Want to see if we have any classes together?”
I nod, and we both pull out our schedules. We compare classes and find we’ll be in the same theatre class this semester.
My heart pinches when I see the musical class on his list, but I try not to let my disappointment show. It’s not his fault I’m not in it.
“This year is going to be great,” he says as he puts his schedule away.
I hope so.
My heart races as I rush through the emergency room doors and to the front desk. My ears are ringing as anxiety threatens to consume me.
“How can I help you?” the woman at the front desk asks, typing on her computer.
“Talmage Monson. He—he came in with the fire department.”
“Are you family?
“I’m his wife.”
She clicks a few times. “I’ll have a nurse come grab you in a moment to take you back to him.”
She’s far too calm about this. He’s injured! Can’t she tell I’m losing my mind with worry over here?
I take a seat and try to count the ceiling tiles to calm my frayed nerves. I hate hospitals, but this hospital makes me especially itchy with anxiety. It’s the hospital I was taken to after—
I take a deep breath and shake my head. Thinking about it will only send me into an anxiety spiral.
I almost didn’t answer the call from the unknown number earlier, but something in my gut told me I needed to, just like the night my parents died.
It was Enoch, Tal’s friend, letting me know there was an incident at a fire, and Tal was being taken to Mountainside Memorial.
I didn’t even hesitate to message my manager and get to my car. I white-knuckled the entire drive, tears blurring my vision. Enoch didn’t have time to give me any more information on how serious it was, so my mind immediately went to third degree burns and life-altering damage or worse, death.
I don’t want to lose him when I just got him back.
He’s already embedded himself into my life, burrowed under my skin. I can’t lose the love of my life again.
Not when I haven’t even told him I love him. I’ve been too much of a coward to give in to my feelings because I’m worried he’ll reject me again.
You’re so stupid.
The rejection would hurt, yes, but can I live with myself if I let him slip away for a second time? Can I survive it?
Tal has been tattooed onto my skin since I was fourteen years old. Even when I tried to cover it up, he was always there underneath the surface. Now, he’s engraved onto my fucking soul. Losing him in any capacity will be like ripping out a vital organ.
But am I strong enough to lay it all out there again? To risk my heart ?
“Talmage Monson’s family?” a nurse in blue scrubs calls from the doorway to the back of the ER.
I stand, and out of the corner of my eye, I see a familiar woman do the same.
Oh great. Talmage’s mom is here.
Laurie Monson looks the same as when I was a teenager, though her hair is a bit more gray than blonde now, pinned back in a neat ponytail.
Her face pinches into a frown. “What are you doing here?”
“I’m his wife. I came to make sure he’s okay.”
“Well, I’m his emergency contact.”
“He must not have updated it yet. Either way, I’m going back there to make sure my husband is alright,” I snap.
The nurse clears her throat. “If you ladies will follow me.”
The nurse leads us to a curtained off area, directing us to go inside. Tal gives me a sheepish grin as he sees me. He has a tan wrap around his left ankle, and he looks exhausted but otherwise unharmed. I want to go to him, give him a hug, sob uncontrollably with relief that he’s okay—
“Oh! My baby!” Laurie wails, pushing past me and throwing her arms around his neck.
Tal’s grin falls. “Mom? What are you doing here?”
“I’m your emergency contact, they called to let me know you were injured.” She tries to stroke his face, but he gently bats her hands away.
He looks at me. “I was going to change it tomorrow when I talked to HR about benefits. I’m so sorry, Mack. ”
“You don’t need to apologize. I’m just glad you’re okay. What happened?” I motion towards his ankle.
“I have a grade two sprain. I got tangled in a rug and went down trying to save a dog.”
I let out a long, relieved breath. A sprained ankle is painful but not life-threatening. All of this for a dog?
“Oh my goodness! Do you need to stay at my house so I can take care of you? I don’t want you to be alone,” Laurie coos, and Talmage looks annoyed.
“No, Mom. I live with my wife, who is more than capable of helping me. I just have to stay off of it for the next few weeks and use crutches, then I’ll have to go to physical therapy.”
Laurie glares at me like I’m controlling what Talmage says.
“There’s no one more fit to take care of you than your mother.”
“My wife does an excellent job taking care of me. I think it’d be best if you leave. I want Mack to take me home so I can rest.”
“You’re not still upset—”
“Oh, I am. You haven’t apologized for the way you spoke to me the last time we talked, and I’m too tired to deal with it right now. If you’d like to check in on me, you can send me a text, but until you’re ready to apologize, I want some space.”
Laurie’s eyes well with tears. “Fine. I’ll be praying for you.”
Then, she storms out.
Tal motions for me to sit on the chair next to his bed, so I do .
“I was so scared when Enoch called me,” I whisper. “He didn’t give me any information other than you were at the hospital.” My voice cracks, and a tear slips out. He may be okay, but my body is still shaking with fear.
Tal reaches over and grabs my hand, interlacing our fingers. “Damn it, I’m so sorry, Firefly. I wish he would have told you it wasn’t anything serious. Nothing life-threatening. I may be off of work for two weeks, but I’m okay. I’m here, and I’m safe. I’m not going anywhere.”
“Don’t be sorry. It’s not like you did it on purpose.” I sniffle. “I know you didn’t have control over this. I just… I d-don’t want to lose you, Tal.”
“You’re not going to lose me, Mack. Hey, look at me.” I lift my chin to look at him through my tears. “You have me, for as long as you want me. I’m not going anywhere.”
I want you forever.