Chapter 21 Chasing Happiness
Chapter Twenty-One
Chasing Happiness
NORA
Light spills through the crack under the door as Kairos showers, and I can’t help but stare.
I’m not sure what the hell I’m even watching for.
The door is made of solid marble, black with intricate lines of gold, but I can’t help but wish it was made only of glass.
To see him drenched in water and foamy bubbles, to get just a glimpse of his slick skin and the thick muscles beneath every tattoo covering his arms and chest would be a dream.
I know I shouldn’t think this way. I know this, and yet still, I can’t deny my attraction to him.
I’ve felt it since the night I officially met him at the club.
There’s something about his soul that refuses to let me pretend I feel nothing.
I try and fail. I blame it on the fact that I’m being haunted and possessed and need a distraction from the chaos that is my life. It has to be that.
Kairos gave me a thorough tour of his home as soon as we got here.
The black marble covers every surface, and though the gold accents are stunning, the coved ceilings that form a dome above each room is my favorite part.
Even the outside of the homes here are carved from thick marble, all of them with spires stretching up toward the starlit sky, each its own little temple or sanctuary of peace jutting into the cosmos.
Kairos said stars are made of celestial light, but not the ones here.
They’re made of divine light. Even with the bright blue diamonds twinkling in the sky, it’s dark and moody here and I love it.
The darkness that has tormented my mind for the past year feels weak in the Realm of Darkness.
In a weird way, it’s like a part of myself is missing after carrying it with me for so long.
One thing I’ve learned about those of us who have darkness in our veins, is as much as we want it gone, sometimes it’s sad to see it go.
We’re left with these gaping holes from all the things it takes when it leaves.
How do we refill those empty spaces? I suppose we should feel lucky that it left at all, even if it is fleeing and will return. Some of us aren’t so lucky.
A part of me wishes I could stay here and be free of the darkness forever, but I know this is only temporary.
I miss Olivia and Hekate so much already.
And Ere. I miss him, too. I understand that all of this is a lot to deal with but refusing to call or even respond to my texts is low.
Shouldn’t he care how I’m doing? Shouldn’t he want to make sure I’m okay?
I can only assume he has officially bailed.
He finally reached his limit on the level of madness he can deal with from me.
My thoughts drift away as Kairos begins to sing, his deep voice warm and gentle and comforting.
I can’t help but smile. His baritone singing is off key and far from being good, but my soul sings along just the same.
The shower handle squeaks and the water abruptly shuts off, so I quickly pull the black t-shirt he let me borrow over my head, inhaling the rich, leather and amber scent of him deep into my lungs.
I toss my towel into the shimmery hamper by the door, for a moment wondering if it’s possible that it’s made of pure gold.
From the looks of it, it might very well be.
Having his intoxicating scent wrapped around me sends excited shivers through my body.
I leap into bed, pull the covers up to my chin, and then fix my eyes to the wide-open balcony doors and the orbs of celestial light hovering around outside, just as he enters the room.
According to Kairos, the Realm of Light is powered by celestial light, and without the existence of it, the realm could no longer exist. Divine light, which is even stronger and more powerful, he says, only existed within me before I created the Realm of Darkness and planted it here.
The celestials believe that without the existence of divine light, all light would cease to exist. Something about that thought terrifies me, that my life, my power alone, keeps the realms from crumbling to nothing.
It shouldn’t be me. It should be anyone but me who holds that power.
“You look comfortable.”
His voice pulls me away from my thoughts, my eyes widening at the sight of him.
I force my face to relax, giving him a neutral, unaffected smile, though it’s difficult as he leans against the door frame, shirtless with only a thin towel wrapped snuggly around his waist. Good god, he’s a work of art.
I rake my eyes up and down his body, admiring the smooth muscles and the intricate black ink that does in fact cover his entire abdomen, chest, and arms.
He. Is. Perfection.
“Nice towel,” I blurt, closing my eyes for a moment and fighting the urge to scream for committing the crime of not thinking before speaking.
It’s fine. Just… be cool. “You look pretty comfy yourself. I mean I doubt you could get much more comfortable unless you lost the towel completely. Nothing beats lounging around completely nude, am I right?”
Nailed it.
His slow, crooked smile tells me that I did not, in fact, nail it. Crossing his arms over his muscular chest, shoulder still pressed against the door frame, his green eyes shine brighter than the celestial light outside the balcony.
“Are you asking me to get naked for you, princess?” His teasing smile grows as my cheeks blaze from his words.
“You could at least spend a little time getting to know me first. What’s my favorite color?
My favorite flower?” Straightening and letting his hands fall to his sides, he tucks his wings in tight and prowls toward me.
“My last name, even, what is it?” His head tilts slightly and he’s still wearing that annoying, amused smile that taunts me.
He thinks he’s being funny, but he’s not.
I can’t laugh right now, not when I’m so thoroughly humiliated.
He’s too hot for me to be able to form coherent sentences, and it doesn’t help that he can sense everything I feel whether I try to hide it or not.
I’m an awkward mess with him. Not that I’ve met a winged, immortal man before, but even without that, Kairos is like no one I’ve ever encountered.
His claiming to be my fated mate doesn’t help the situation either. I don’t know how the hell to act.
Brushing his wet blond locks back, his emerald eyes sparkle and penetrate my soul.
My heart thuds loudly in my chest. He refuses to look away and I find myself not wanting him to, wanting him to dive deeper into my soul instead, to find and capture the part of me he says used to exist with him and bring her back.
I panic as his hands clench the towel at his waist, hoping he doesn’t actually plan on removing it, but also really wishing he would.
“What is your last name, then?” Breathless words somehow find their way out, his body suddenly feeling too close and yet too far away.
“Kairos Davenshire is my full name. My favorite color is red. My favorite flowers are roses.” The corners of his lips twitch, but not with a smile, with an unspoken sadness.
“Roses have a special meaning to me.” His throat bobs as his eyes drift from mine to my lips and back up again.
“I want you to know everything, Nora. About me. About this realm. About you and…us.”
It drives me wild, the way he looks at me as if I’m the only thing he sees. Like I’m the only thing he has ever or will ever be able to see. I want to know everything about him.
Sitting up in bed, I tuck the silky blanket around my waist, leaning my back against the leather headboard.
“How old are you? How long have you been a guardian and the commander of your army? Was I happy before? Were we happy together?” I tilt my head, noting the way his spine stiffens and then the muscles across his chest flex and unflex as he shifts on his feet.
I should have asked one question at a time. That was a lot to bombard him with all at once. I’m sure this is hard for him to handle, having to worry about protecting me from evil while also teaching me about things I should already know. There’s just so much I still don’t understand.
Taking a seat on the edge of the bed and facing me, he stares down at the floor.
“I’m young compared to most of the celestials.
I’ll be two hundred years old on July thirteenth.
” He looks at me and smiles. “Don’t worry.
You can skip getting me a gift next year, considering you feel you barely know me. ”
I smile but roll my eyes dramatically and we both laugh.
“I spent my whole life training to be a guardian and a fighter before I met you. Unlike you who was created out of magic, I always knew what I would become because I was born and raised here with my parents.”
“Your parents. The ones who rule the celestial realms,” I breathe, shaking my head in disbelief.
I can’t imagine the pressure someone would feel being a son or daughter of such high-ranking rulers. It couldn’t have been easy for him. Especially now being separated from his father.
He nods once, rubbing his hands down the front of his towel.
“Being a celestial is my whole life. I just want peace in the realms. So do my parents. So did you, and we fought for it every day once you formed the Dark Legion of Warriors. I joined and became your first in command and we were inseparable after.” Meeting my eyes, his smile is weak and his voice cracks as he continues. “You were happy. We both were.”
I wish I could climb into his mind and experience the past the way he remembers it. I’d love to remember us. I hate that I can’t.