47. Ethan
47
ETHAN
As I pull up in front of Madison’s house, the familiar sounds of barking reach me even before I’ve stepped out of the truck. Her place is never quiet with all the dogs. I kind of like how alive it feels, though I know she gets tired of them following her around like a pack leader all day.
I walk up to the door, let myself in, and am immediately greeted by Luna, wagging her tail like she’s been waiting for me all day. Samson’s nowhere in sight, but I know where he’ll be. His stitches are still healing, even though he doesn’t act like it. He acts just as energetic as always.
“Hey, Luna,” I say, rubbing the pup’s ears before moving toward the kitchen. Madison’s sitting at the table, cradling a cup of coffee like it’s the only thing keeping her awake right now. She has circles around her eyes, and I can tell she’s tired.
I walk right over to her and wrap my arms around her. I kiss the top of her head, and we just stand like that for a minute. I love the feeling of her in my arms.
“Hey, you didn’t have to come by. I’m sure your shift was long today. ”
I drop my keys on the counter and give her another kiss. “Of course I did. You’ve got too much on your plate as it is. I thought I’d take care of the dogs today, give you a break. I’m sure you would enjoy a quiet house for thirty minutes.”
Her lips quirk into a half-smile. “Yeah, I tried to take a nap this afternoon. I was so tired, but then, Goofus started barking like someone was breaking into the house. It was the mail truck. But at that point, my nap was ruined.”
I can tell she’s exhausted. I rub her back slowly, then ask the question I know I have to ask. Because even though I just want to be with Madison and pretend the rest of the world doesn’t exist, it does. “Have you talked to Aurora?”
“No.” Madison shakes her head, then pushes herself to her feet and wraps her arms around me, burying her face in my chest. It’s clear from her reaction that she doesn’t want to talk about it any further. That’s fine. We can talk about it later.
“How’s Samson doing?”
“He’s doing great. He acts like he was never hurt, though I can tell he’s shy of the other dogs now. More than before. He prefers to be with me rather than them. I hate that he’s so affected like that.”
I kiss Madison yet again. It’s hard to keep my hands and lips off her before nodding to the back door. “I’ll take them all outside and get them some exercise, then I’ll be back for you.”
“You’re going to get me some exercise too?” Madison asks, grinning.
I laugh. “Maybe, if you have the energy for it.”
We laugh together, and it feels good to dispel the tension that’s riding on both of us. I go through the motions of getting the dogs ready to go out. As soon as I pick up one leash, they get the idea and start bouncing around me like a group of kangaroos instead of dogs. But finally, we get outside.
The cold air whips its way across my skin, and I bury as much of my face in my coat as I can, crossing my arms so that my hands are in my armpits as I watch the dogs play. Samson is definitely acting more cautious today, and I can see where his neck is shaved still from the stitches. They at least look like they aren’t infected, which is good news.
My thoughts turn to Madison. I need to make sure she’s doing okay, mentally and emotionally. I know Aurora has probably not been helping in that department, but I’m determined to do what I can to make sure Madison is taken care of.
With a long whistle, I call the dogs back to me, and they come streaking across the yard, eager to be the first on a leash.
Once everyone is back inside, Madison looks up from where she’s still sitting in the kitchen. “That silence was so beautiful. Thank you for taking them for a little while.”
I reach down and scratch Samson behind the ears. He leans into me as if to say I’ve found just the right spot. Madison and I laugh at the look of pure pleasure that seems to take over his doggy face.
When I look up, Madison’s eyes are filled with tears. Wasn’t she just laughing? What happened? I release Samson and step over to her. “Madison?”
“I’m sorry. About everything. About Aurora. I just… I don’t want to mess things up between us. But I need to figure out how to get her to come around. I can’t?—”
I stand up, closing the distance between us in a few strides. “Madison, you don’t have to apologize. This thing with Aurora… It’s hard. I get that. But it’s not on you to fix everything. She’s her own person. ”
She looks up at me, her expression conflicted. “But it is on me, Ethan. I’m the one who’s coming into her life and changing things. If she doesn’t accept me being with you, I don’t know how we can make this work. I want this to work, but I can’t have her hate me for the rest of her life. I just can’t do that…to either of you.”
I take her hands in mine, squeezing them gently. “Aurora’s got a lot to sort through. But she’ll come around. She’s…always needed time to process things. Give her time. In a couple of days, reach out, and you may find she’s completely changed her mind. In the meantime, maybe you need a break. A distraction.”
“A distraction?”
I nod. “Yeah. Something to get your mind off everything, at least for a little while. What do you say we go over to that building I got you for your surfing school and start getting it ready?”
Madison instantly smiles, and I know it was the right decision. “Yes, that would be fun. I’ve thought about it every day since you gave it to me, but… I just wasn’t sure where to start.”
“Why not start with paint? It’ll help clear your head, and maybe we can actually start making some progress toward getting that surf school up and running. Besides, once we’ve started painting, that’s something you can do on your own if you want.”
She hesitates for a moment, then nods, a small smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. “Okay, let’s do it.”
We go to the home improvement store together, and it feels like a big step. So far, we’ve only been together at our houses or out walking. But this…shopping for paint together, feels like a big step. People are seeing us together as a couple .
I smile proudly as we stand there and talk about different colors.
“Do you have a name yet?”
Madison smiles sheepishly. “No, I haven’t thought much about a name. I think naming things is the hardest part.”
“You can paint the name on later. Right now, let’s just get a protective coat of paint on the whole place. We need paint that is meant to protect the walls despite the difficult weather it’s going to face.”
I start reading paint cans and don’t notice the sales associate arriving until he’s standing right next to me. “Can I help you two with anything?”
I put my arm around Madison’s shoulders and smile, just happy to be out with her.
“We’re looking for some paint. It will be on… a deck. Outside.”
“You need this type.” The sales associate points to a selection a little further down. We thank him, and he moves on.
Madison squeezes me even more tightly. “He didn’t say anything.”
“What do you mean? He showed us exactly where the paint was.”
She whispers, “No, I mean about us. I didn’t even feel judgment in his eyes about our ages or anything.”
“Maybe it’s because you look older than you are.”
She laughs. “Are you calling me old? That’s not a compliment. We could pretend you look like you’re in your late twenties, but I think we both know that isn’t true.”
I laugh and kiss the top of her head. “Let’s get this paint to the building.”
The building isn’t much to look at yet, but standing in the middle of it with Madison by my side gives us the chance to let our imaginations run wild. The surf school she’s always dreamed of is finally happening.
Madison surveys the space, her eyes lighting up the way they do when she’s excited about something. I hand her a paint roller, and she takes it with a grin. “Alright, let’s see what we can do.”
We spend the next few hours painting the walls, working together in comfortable silence. Every once in a while, I steal a glance at her. I can’t help it. I love looking at her, especially when I see the joy on her face.
We talk a little as we work, and I feel like I can finally relax. “I can’t believe this is actually happening. I need to do some research on pricing. I want to be competitive, but not a steal.”
“You’re trading your time for money, so make sure it’s worth it. And if you need help with advertising, I have a buddy who works in it. He could probably at least give us a few tips.”
“Oh, I need all the tips I can get. My friend Mia is dating the man who built that resort. He might know about advertising because it seems like their rooms are always full.”
“Maybe we can make a list of people who can be resources for you as you figure out how to spread the word.”
I turn back to the wall and roll on another layer of paint. Suddenly, Madison is behind me, wrapping her arms around me so that I can’t paint the wall properly. “What are you doing?”
“Hugging you. I’m allowed to hug you, aren’t I?”
“You’re allowed to do whatever the hell you want with me.”
Madison laughs. “Good, because I… I appreciate you ta king care of me. This building… It was really over-the-top, but it’s also just what I need. I mean…now that I’m pregnant, it would be easy to kind of give up on my dreams. But you gave me a way to keep them alive.”
I turn and kiss Madison’s lips. I want to say something cheesy, but the right thing doesn’t come to mind before she turns back around and continues painting.
After a while, Madison steps back, her roller still in hand, and looks at the wall with a satisfied smile. “It’s starting to look like something, huh?”
I chuckle. “Yeah, it is. Not bad for a couple of amateurs.”
She laughs, and the sound is like music to my ears. I set my roller down and walk over to her, wrapping my arms around her waist from behind. She leans into me, her body relaxing against mine. I just want to touch her all the time.
“I’m glad that you’re enjoying this. We can lock up the paint cans here, and you can come work whenever you have the energy. But just keep the windows and door open so the paint fumes don’t get to be so much.”
She turns in my arms, looking up at me with those big, soulful eyes. Apparently, she’s not worried about paint fumes. Her mind is back on our biggest issue right now. “I’m still scared, Ethan. About Aurora and…being a mom.”
I cup her face gently, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. “I know you are. But we’ll get through it. One step at a time.”
Madison nods, but I can see the uncertainty still lingering in her eyes. “I just don’t want to have to do it alone. I guess that’s my biggest fear.”
“You don’t have to. I’m right here.”
“But what if Aurora never comes around? What if she demands you have to pick her or this new kid?”
“Then, I’ll tell her I won’t choose, but if she chooses not to accept someone who is part of my family, then she’s the one making the choice to divide us.”
Madison seems to accept my answer, and I wrap my arm around her, moving her outside. The smell of paint is strong, even with the windows open.
“I want you to stop worrying and just trust. We’ve got this, okay?”
Madison nods, her head moving up and down against my shoulder. I guess that’s the best answer I’m going to get from her right now. Madison needs time to accept our new reality.
Meanwhile, I’m going to keep working on Aurora.