Chapter 20
Under normal circumstances, finding Lucy naked, wrapped in a towel in my bed would have been a wet dream, but tonight had been such a shock to everyone that I simply slipped into bed and wrapped my arms around her.
She shifted beneath the weight, turned and buried her face in my chest, cold hands gripping my shirt. “I’m sorry.”
“What are you sorry for, Daze?”
I brushed the damp hair out of her face and watched my beautiful girl break.
“I should have handled that better. I should be past all this grief. I should have held it together in front of the kids and your parents. Shit, I should be with the girls. I’m handling this all wrong.”
Her hot tears soaked into my shirt.
“The kids are okay, babe. We talked and rode the horses. Ultimately, they were more concerned about you.”
“They shouldn’t be worried about me. Kids shouldn’t worry about their parents.”
Her shoulders shook violently as the tears continued.
“These circumstances are different, Lucy. They were in the car with you. They were in the hospital. It is as much their experience as it is yours. They deserve to see justice come through for their dad. You deserve it too.”
I rubbed her back as her breathing began to regulate.
“I don’t want it to be their experience. Eve used to be just as bubbly as Kaley and then the accident happened and now…she’s so quiet, Garrett.”
I kissed her cheek. “She is reserved, but she is processing everything very well. She still smiles. She has friends. All your children are surrounded by family that loves them. You are doing all the right things.”
“I don’t know how to press charges. I don’t want to go to court. I don’t want to see this man.”
Her arms wrapped around me and squeezed.
I took a deep breath and offered, “What if I come with you. We’ll go to the station and discuss options. You have to go pack up the house anyway. We’ll go together.”
She sniffled and nodded against my chest. “Okay.”
I wanted nothing more than to tell her I loved her. It was my plan to tell her tonight after taking the kids riding. It wasn’t the right time, but I wanted to tell her that every moment, every breath, every thought was about her and the kids. I was all in.
“Everyone is tucked in. The girls are watching a movie on a pallet they made in the living room and Liam is asleep in the guest room. I installed a baby monitor, so you’d know when he wakes up. Get some rest. We can make a detailed plan in the morning, okay?”
I’d ran to the store for some essentials yesterday on my way home. I had seen the monitor and thought it was something we would need. The crib sitting in the closet was probably an overstep, so it would remain in the closet.
Her response was barely audible, but she agreed, falling asleep in mere minutes.
I replayed the evening with Eve and Kaley as I closed my eyes and held Lucy.
Kaley was sitting atop Herman, holding the pommel of the saddle, petting the horse’s side when she said, “Mom says we shouldn’t hate people, but I hate the driver that killed Daddy.”
“Kaley,”
Eve scolded, arms crossed over her chest, eyes bloodshot from crying.
“Well, I do.”
I adjusted the blanket I had over Liam and sighed. “Can I tell you guys a secret?”
Eve looked up at me, while Kaley nodded.
“I hate the man who killed your dad. David was my best friend. I loved him like a brother and now we are all left to live life without him. It’s not fair and it hurts. But the way I look at it is that the driver finally turned himself in and now can be punished for what he did.”
Eve kicked the dirt beneath her feet, dark hair fell over her face as she said, “Sometimes I wished he’d have died too, the driver. That would have been fair.”
“Evalyn,”
Kaley scolded back. “That’s worse than me saying I hated him.”
I shook my head and placed a hand on Eve’s shoulder. Her brown eyes found mine. “Your feelings are valid, and I understand why you think that way.”
“I miss our dad.”
Eve sighed, swiping a runaway tear from her cheek. “But I think he’d be happy that Mom, me, Kaley, and Liam have you and our uncles and Gran.”
“I’d like to think he’d be happy with the way things worked out, too.”
Kaley laid her head on Herman’s neck. “Do you love our mom?”
I swallowed nervously, not sure if they were really ready for this conversation, but I decided it was best to be honest. “I have loved your mom for a very, very long time.”
“Do you think you could love us?”
Eve mumbled almost imperceptibly.
I boop the tip of her nose with my finger. “Loving you guys is as easy as loving your mom.”
Liam bounced in his carrier.
I sent a silent prayer to David, hoping that I was doing right by his family, begging for a sign that he approved. I hoped I was making all the right decisions for their sakes.
Sleep eventually came. Lucy and I woke still wrapped in each other’s limbs when the sun peeked through the window.
“We really need to get you some black out curtains,”
Lucy grumbled as she stretched in my arms.
“The horses would stage a protest if I slept in past seven a.m.”
She harumphed as she snuggled into my chest. “I think I’m going to plan to head to Virginia next week. I’ll ask Brett to watch the kids. I should call the officer back.”
“I’ll need to find coverage for the station, but I’ll be with you regardless, as long as you want me to go that is.”
She looked up at me sheepishly. “I do want you to come. I don’t think I can do this on my own.”
“Of course.”
“I was supposed to have girls’ night tonight,”
she said absently, staring out the window.
“Why can’t you?”
I countered.
“Who is going to want to be around me when I’m such a mess?”
“Daze, those girls love you and honestly if they lovingly support Allison and all she is going through, they’ll be there for you as well.”
She sighed and rolled out of my arms. “Thank you for all you did last night.”
“Luce, if we are going to be a couple, that means I’m all in. I want to be there for you, for the kids. I want this. I want to be your family. Anything I can do for you all, I’ll do it.”
Her breath caught as she looked at me. “I’m not sure you know what you’re saying, Garrett.”
“Bullshit. You know I am fully aware of what I’m saying. I’m saying I love you, Lucy. I’ve loved you for what feels like an eternity. I love your kids. You guys are an amazing family, and I want to be a part of it for all that it entails.”
Tears brimmed in her eyes. “Garrett, you can’t. You can’t love me. Look at me. I’m a mess.”
I grabbed her hip and pulled her flush against my chest. “I love you, Lucy Marie. No amount of arguing will change my mind. I’ve seen you cry over hitting a butterfly with your car. I’ve seen you cuss out a ref for a bad call at mine and David’s football game. I’ve seen you at your lowest, and at your highest- the night you married David. And I am telling you right now, I want to continue going through this life at your side. I want to hold your hand through every bit of it and tell you every day that I love you.”
So much for waiting for the right time.
Whatever fight she was putting up against her tears, Lucy lost as she threw her arms around my neck and hugged me.
“I’ve always loved you too, Garrett. Not in the same way as I love you now, but there has always been love.”
“I know baby, I know.”
I kissed her slowly, letting my tongue dance against her lips, breathing in the moan that escaped them.
Her arms wrapped around my neck gently, as her lips moved with mine. We breathed each other in, slowly exploring one another. Her hands slipped beneath my shirt, exploring my chest. I’d like to say I was a gentleman who pulled away and said let’s wait for another time, but there is only so much restraint I have when Lucy is still incredibly naked, breasts rising and falling with each passionate breath. My hands, operating with a mind of their own, caressed her soft skin, pinching those peaked nipples. She moaned into the kiss and that was it. I was on top of her, grabbing, caressing, kissing everywhere she let me.
“Make love to me, Garrett,”
she breathed, resting her forehead against mine.
I kissed her cheek. “With pleasure.”
My hand slipped down to the apex of her thighs, fingers finding her clit swirling in slow and sure circles. Lucy shuddered beneath my touch, dropping her head to my shoulder, moaning my name. God everything about her turned me on. Her voice, her breath on my skin.
“Garrett, take your stupid clothes off.”
She tugged on my shirt for emphasis.
Chuckling, I picked up the pace with my fingers just enough to make her breathing ragged, then removed them quickly. Her sigh of frustration made me shake my head as I removed my shirt and boxers.
Her eyes roamed over my body hungrily. Without hesitation, she gripped the base of my dick and licked from base to tip. I saw fucking stars as my fingers wrapped themselves in her hair. Those thick lips pressed against the tip before she took me into her mouth and her name fell like a prayer from my mouth.
She sucked and licked while pumping her hand and dammit if it wasn’t the best way to start my morning.
I used my grip on her hair to pull her back up, pressing a kiss on her swollen mouth. “If you keep that up, I won’t be able to make love to you. Lay down, Daze.”
She smiled as she kissed me back. “Yes, Sheriff.”
Fuck me. I rolled my eyes as she laid on her back, tits bouncing in the movement. “You’re a goddamn dream come true, Lucy.”
She blushed as I hovered over her, wrapping her arms around my neck. I lined myself up, slowly easing into her, doing my best to make love and not become a feral animal as her walls clamped tight around me.
“Garrett,”
she moaned as her head fell back against the pillow.
Our hands roamed each other, exploring, learning, memorizing until Lucy’s walls pulsed around mine. I slide my arm between her back and the mattress, holding her to me as we matched each other’s rhythm. We both tensed, reaching ecstasy together, wrapped in one another’s arms.
I kissed her softly as I laid next to her, catching my breath. She curled against my side, sighing contentedly. We stayed like that for just a few minutes. Liam’s cry echoed down the hall and through the baby monitor.
Lucy smiled as she stretched in the bed. “I guess that’s my que.”
She grabbed my discarded shirt, throwing it on before grabbing her pants and underwear from the bathroom and hopping into them haphazardly. She quickly headed to Liam’s room, well, the guest room, well… It wouldn’t be a far reach to make it Liam’s room. My parents still slept in the room next to mine while the girls were upstairs in those rooms. Maybe I should invest in décor that would make it more inviting for them.
But what I should have been doing right now was heading out to the barn. I’m sure the horses were getting restless. Groaning as I rubbed my eyes, I rolled out of the bed and got dressed.
Just as I was pulling my jacket on, the girls’ feet came thundering down the stairs. I smiled up at them, remembering the way Graham and I used to do the same thing, except sometimes we also slid down the banister. Shit, I prayed that idea would never cross their minds.
“Is Mom, okay?”
Eve asked, concern clouding her eyes.
I nodded, placing what I hoped was a comforting hand on her shoulder. “She will be. Just give her all the hugs, okay?”
Kaley took that suggestion and literally ran with it, full speed until her little arms found her mom in the guest room with Liam, wrapping her in a tight embrace.
“I love you.”
I heard her say as I smiled and ushered Eve into the kitchen.
“Did you guys sleep ok?”
I asked as I began the pot of coffee.
Eve nodded, climbing onto the barstool. “I slept really well until Kaley crawled into my bed.”
She shrugged, grabbing an apple from the fruit bowl and twirling it idly. “She gets nervous sleeping by herself now.”
“Does it bother you, sharing a bedroom with her?”
I raised a mug, silently asking if she wanted coffee.
Shaking her head, she focused on the apple in her hand. “Dad used to rock her to sleep every night. I think sharing a room helps her. Maybe in a year or two it will bother me more, but I like it sometimes.”
She quickly lifted her finger and pointed at me. “I never admitted that.”
Her eyes shot daggers, and I couldn’t help but chuckle.
“I heard nothing.”
I made the gesture of locking my lips.
“Do you have more hot cocoa?”
Eve peered around me, looking towards the cabinet with the drink mix.
I smiled and offered a nod, moving to get milk and cocoa.