Chapter 39
Zahn is a weird concoction of nervous, playful, silly and aroused. I’ve never seen him like this before, but damn if it isn’t making this milestone moment more relaxed. He’s laughing at me while groping me, caught between desire and nervousness.
“I think that’s enough, Remy.” He grins, letting out a slow, sexy laugh.
“Are you sure?” I’m panicking a little. Not gonna lie.
“Remy!” he shouts, grabbing the brand new bottle of lube that is half empty now. “If you add any more lube, we’re going to slide right off each other. It’s more than enough.” He tosses the bottle. “Fuck me.”
How? What position? How does sex with him start? Do I have to warm him up first, or can I just fucking get in there? This is all new to me, and now I’m second-guessing if two fingers as prep is enough.
“Remy.” Zahn grabs my cheeks. “Hesitate any longer and I’ll use the other half of that bottle on your ass and start this show myself. Stop worrying. I don’t mind some pain.” He smirks. “Go slow.”
Alright, fuck it. I grab the bottle and set it next to him on the bed, just in case we need more than half a fucking bottle. I want this. He wants it. We’re ready. No more hesitating. I kiss his smirking lips and push him onto his back.
“You want it like this?” he teases, looking up at me.
Yes, I want it like this because I want to be able to see his face the first time I fuck him. I’m not going to admit that, because fuck him, but really, fuck him.
Naked and slightly afraid, I push his knees apart and kneel between his legs. Zahn shivers when I slide my hands up the inside of his legs, his chest rising and falling because he has no chill. It builds my confidence enough to take him in my fist, letting my fingers fondle his balls. I thought it might take some getting used to, touching a man like this, but no. As soon as he sucks in a gasp, I dip my fingers back even farther, pressing two into his already lubed and stretched hole.
“Yeah, I kind of like that,” he rasps.
“You better.” I finger fuck him, losing a bit of coordination with my right hand on his shaft. “Because my dick is gonna be in there.”
“Is it?” he teases me. “Feels like you’re stalling.”
I add a third finger, slowly opening him for me.
“Ugh,” he groans. “Come on, Remy. I’m prepped. Let me feel you.” He reaches forward, spreading the obscene amount of leftover lube over my cock.
When I grab the bottle and add a little more, he laughs at me, and I can’t help but laugh back. To be honest, this is not what I was expecting for our first time. I thought it’d be all heat of the moment, barbaric, hedonistic and rushed, but this playful, slightly nervous atmosphere feels kind of perfect.
Lubed up and ready to go, I try to spread his legs wider, pushing his knees back, but they won’t go. “Jesus fuck, Zahn. You need to do more yoga if you’re gonna start taking dick.”
“Yoga later,” he snaps at me. “Just fuck me now.”
I tug under his knees, bringing his ass flush with my body. When the head of my dick presses against his hole, a rush of something powerful waves through me. Zahn’s eyes meet mine, his green gaze just as powerful as the rush that passes through me. He nods, licking his lips, and I swallow the remainder of my nerves.
I nudge against him, leaning forward slightly. Zahn tenses, but his hands grab at my hips, pulling me forward. When I break through the tight ring of muscle, I let out a guttural groan.
“Shit.” He gasps.
“Are you okay?” I try to pull out, but he keeps me there. “More lube?”
“No more lube. Fuck. Just keep going.”
I rock into him, gentle and slow. Zahn wants more, so I press forward. His eyes snap to mine and he lets out a gravelly sound, partway between a moan and a choke. His legs vice around my hips and his ass squeezes my cock, hugging it in all the ways that make it want to shoot off too soon. I pull out a bit, holding my breath, and when I thrust inside him, I let it out as a moan.
“Oh my fuck,” I praise him. Or this. This whole fucking situation is everything. From the way his fingertips dig into my skin to the way his legs clamp around me to keep me steady, I’m living for this moment. It’s slowed down to allow for appreciation, but the finer details are evading me because I’m so hyperfocused on the way his ass clenches around my shaft.
“Are… are you all the way in?” he asks.
I laugh. I can’t help it. He laughs with me because every single person who gets fucked in the ass must ask that question. “Half.”
“Good lord.”
I grin, cocky. “You okay?”
“I’m… yeah. More than okay. It’s weird, but fuck, I like it. More, Remy.”
More. Okay. I alternate between watching my dick enter his ass and checking in on his face to make sure he’s okay. My body goes through phases of edging itself, but breath control and the absolute need to make this good for Zahn keep me in check. When my thighs hit his ass, our eyes connect.
“We’re fucking,” he whispers like he’s just clueing in. “Holy shit, Remy. We’re fucking.”
“Oh, good. Glad you’re with it enough to know that.” I pull out and push back in. “We’re fucking.”
Zahn doesn’t know if he wants to moan, laugh, gape at the absurdity of it, or turn primal. But after a few thrusts, I make that decision for him because I can’t fucking help myself. He seems fine, not in pain, wanting more, so I slam into him hard and fast. His harsh inhale and slow groan are all the permission I need to keep going.
There’s lube everywhere, but I don’t even care because I’m fucking Zahn Dare, and it’s the best feeling I’ve ever experienced. The awkward energy switches to blatant need, and when Zahn starts rocking his body to meet my thrusts, I buckle forward and wrap a hand around his chin. His lips hit mine, but his teeth rake over my bottom lip a second later. The growl that vibrates from his mouth tingles all the way down my spine, making my ass spasm in anticipation for when we swap roles.
Zahn goes nuts. He holds me still and rocks on my dick, fucking me from the bottom position like the asshole he is. I knew he’d do that.
“Feel good, Zahn?” I thrust deep inside him and hold still.
“So fucking good,” he groans. “Fuck yes.”
“You like getting fucked by a cock?”
“Mmm, just yours. Only you, Remy.”
That declaration has me feeling bold and brave. I grab his cock, jacking him off as I fuck into him. “I’m too close. Fuck this feels good.”
I’m sweating, breathing hard, wondering how the fuck I can fly a heli when I can’t even manage the coordination to fuck him and jerk him at the same time. I’m three pumps from exploding. There’s nothing euphoric or exciting about being in my bedroom. No music plays, no other people are around, no sex is happening anywhere else in the area, yet we’ve built the vibe we both crave from nothing but our chemistry and an awkward start, and now we’re thriving in it.
“I’m there,” he says, head pushing into the mattress. “Fuck knows how, but I am. Come with me, Remy. Ah, god.”
When my orgasm hits, I lose my grip on his cock and fall forward, still fucking him. Zahn ruts up against me, using my abs to get himself off. I’m coming in his ass, barely coherent, not even breathing, when he cries out in pleasure, slicking the space between our bodies. His greedy hands pull down on my back, making sure I stay pressed against him through his orgasm, and fuck me, I love that he’s bold enough to take everything he wants.
“Fuuuuuck, Remy.”
My name in his voice, coming out as a desperate moan, is the hottest thing I’ve ever heard. My head falls forward, banging against his, but I can’t even help it. Tremors of pleasure shake me, buckling my joints and fatiguing my muscles. All feeling goes to my dick, radiating pleasure to encapsulate me fully.
“I’m sorry,” I groan, still coming down from my high.
“For what?” he asks, fatigue in his voice.
For all of it. “For falling. For squishing you. For coming in your ass when we never talked about it. Jesus fuck, Zahn, I don’t even think I’m human right now.” I slump down on top of him and he laughs against my hair. He winces a second later when my dick pops free painfully. “And for that.”
Zahn chuckles against the side of my head, breathing hard against my ear. “I fucking loved that. All of it. Can’t believe I actually came. Dom said I might not the first time.” He wraps his arms around me, holding on tight. “Fuck. Get hard again.”
I can’t even get my legs to work yet.
“Was it too good that you’re still afraid I’ll break your heart, Rem?”
Actually, it was a little bit horrible. It was a mess of hesitation and misplaced instincts, super uncoordinated, and too slippery. But despite all that, it was perfect.
“Yes, you dick.” I push off of him, but Zahn presses his lips to mine for a chaste kiss before helping me fall to my back next to him. “Please let me do that forever. Even that initial awkwardness was so much better than going to some random’s house to hookup. Don’t break my heart, Zahn.”
He links his fingers with mine. “I’m hooked on you too, bud. Goddamn you can fuck an ass.”
“You can take a dick. I feel like that was a trial run and we’ll only get better.” I roll over to look at him, slinging an arm over his cum-covered stomach. “Who knew you’d be such a power bottom?”
“I mean, I could have probably predicted that about myself,” he admits, laughing. “I’m glad you won the fight, Rem. That was… fuck.”
Yeah, it was. My body is happy, my sexual appetite is happy but ravenous for more, and my heart… yeah, my heart is feeling things my lips shouldn’t admit yet.