Chapter 16 Major
I wanted to follow Tumy outside to make sure she was good, but I knew the space was needed. We were in a weird space, and it was because I’d begun pulling back. Falling for her wasn’t a good idea, and I figured I’d make it easier on both of us when it was time to say goodbye.
I stood in the window and watched her as she paced the space in front of the cabin. She was on the phone with someone, and for a second it made my chest tight because I assumed she was talking to another man. She had every right to, but I still didn’t like it.
I told myself that I watched to make sure she was safe, but in reality, I watched because I just liked watching her. My head was full of confusion, and the shit fucked with me.
Sparrow came from wherever he was and rubbed against my leg.
“I know, little buddy. Your mom will be back soon.” I rubbed his back, then patted his head. It was crazy how I’d gotten attached to him and his mother after a few days.
Tumy mentioned watching movies, and since I couldn’t do anything else, I agreed. I could tell she knew that things had changed between us, but she hadn’t said anything.
When I saw her walking toward the front door, I quickly left the window and pretended like I wasn’t staring at her the whole time.
I sat on the couch, and Sparrow sat near my feet.
“Whew. It’s cold out there.” Tumy rubbed her gloved hands together, then removed all her gear.
“I’m sure it is. Do you want some hot chocolate or tea to help warm you up?” I might have been trying to wean myself off her, but I wasn’t a complete asshole.
“I can get it.” She walked over to the couch and sat next to me.
Sparrow jumped into her lap and snuggled against her.
“I don’t mind, Tumy,” I told her as I stood.
That vanilla shit she wore drove me crazy, so I needed to get away from her for a second.
“Okay,” she said as she rubbed Sparrow’s head.
I left the living room and went into the kitchen to make her some hot chocolate. She never said which one she wanted, but I knew she loved my hot chocolate. We also had to get rid of the marshmallows before we left so they didn’t go to waste.
While I warmed up the milk, I thought about all the things I could have said to her but knew I shouldn’t.
It was for the best. She probably had unfinished business with whoever called her phone.
Any other time, I wouldn’t care, but I had to with her, and that was the problem.
I wasn’t in a position to see where things went outside of here.
Once the milk was the right temperature, I turned the stove off and prepared the hot chocolate for her. I made sure to put extra marshmallows in it.
Tumy was covered in one of the throw blankets when I reentered the living room. She sat up and reached for the cup when I passed it to her.
“Thank you. Looks like a lot of marshmallows.” She giggled as she swiped one off the top with the tip of her tongue.
“Yeah, I knew you loved them.” I sat down next to her and turned the television on. “Anything in particular you want to watch?”
“No, whatever you put on is fine. I’ll be surprised if I stay awake through the whole thing anyway.”
The TV had all the streaming apps, so I went to one and found an action comedy to watch. I wasn’t in the mood for any romance or any sexual shit, so I figured action would be the safest bet.
The whole time we watched the movie, Tumy hardly said a word to me.
She would laugh when something was funny, but that was about it.
She didn’t even cuddle against me like she did any other time we watched movies together.
No matter what we watched, she always found a way to be under me.
Her not wanting to be in my skin felt foreign to me.
I ran my hand down my face as Tumy laughed at something in the movie.
She didn’t know the turmoil I was in. It seemed like she didn’t care that things were awkward between us.
Or maybe she tried to play it off the same way I did.
“Maybe you can do a little hunting now that the snow has melted some,” she said as the credits rolled.
“Maybe. It still might not be safe enough just yet.”
“Oh, okay.”
After that, we were quiet, and I turned on another movie. At some point, Tumy got up to fix dinner. While she did that, I lit the fireplace and watched sports highlights.
I did offer to help her, but she declined. For dinner, we had chicken parmesan sandwiches and French fries. We did eat in the kitchen like we’d been doing, but just like everything else, it was different.
Once we finished eating, we cleaned the kitchen together, but conversation was kept to a minimum. There were no deep conversations, no questions about what happened next, or an exchange of numbers. Nothing but talking about some random shit one of us saw on social media.
We found ourselves back in the living room with another movie playing.
It didn’t take long for Tumy to yawn.
“I think I’m going to head to bed.” She stretched and yawned again.
“Okay. I’m not tired yet. I’ll be in soon.”
She looked down at the floor like she was nervous, but then she turned and walked away. Deep down, she and I both knew that I’d lied to her. That was the first and only lie I told her since I met her, and I didn’t like the way it made me feel.
Once I heard her go into the bathroom, then to the bedroom, I got the pillow and comforter I used the first night and tried to get as comfortable as I could on the couch.
I wanted to go in there with Tumy and hold and kiss her at least one more time, but I knew it was better that I didn’t blur the lines any more than they were.
As I stared at the ceiling, I thought about the last couple of days. Maybe I just liked her because it was something to do to pass the time. Maybe the shit wasn’t even real.
It took a long time for me to try to rid my thoughts of her and to get comfortable, but eventually, I fell asleep.