Chapter 7 - Jasper
The sun streaming through the window called to Jasper tantalizingly, warm and inviting despite the season.
Normally, this would have been the sort of time when he and the others would have found a reason to sneak out of work early and go on a hunt in their wolf forms. This time, however, Jasper, Camden, and Franco were hunkered down in one of the meeting rooms in the pack house, each of them hunched over their own stack of notes, trying to make sense of them.
Cillian walked in, and the other three glanced up. He was wearing an uncharacteristically irritated expression as he stalked into the room and slumped into his chair.
“Bad scouting trip?” Camden asked, unnecessarily.
“Yup,” Cillian grunted.
“So you still came up with nothing?” Jasper asked.
“Still haven’t been able to find anything,” Cillian grumbled, seeming more annoyed at the fact that his normally expert tracking skills had failed than anything else.
Growling, he ran his fingers through his hair.
“I just can’t figure it out. We’ve expanded the perimeter again.
He’s got to be as good at hiding his tracks as we are. ”
“Well, that makes sense,” Camden said, flicking through the papers in front of them. “Apparently, he’s ex-military. Got kicked out for insubordination and disobeying orders, which was when Sier found him.”
Grunting, Jasper bent his head again, trying to hide his frustration. It felt like this had been an ongoing ritual for weeks now. They’d heard whispers about Lucas, rumors of sightings, but nothing that had given them any concrete information.
“We could try and smoke him out,” Franco suggested.
“That would be great.” Cillian rubbed his eyes. “Let’s do that once we find out what quadrant the guy is in.”
Shaking his head, Camden slumped forward. “We’ve just got to keep our ears to the ground. He’ll show himself eventually.”
It was a nice sentiment, but Jasper was beginning to have his doubts that Lucas would ever resurface.
Sighing, he began to shuffle through the papers, trying to focus on them instead of allowing his thoughts to wander to Nikki.
He’d put her in this situation. He’d promised her that he would find Lucas, and then this would all be over.
He had meant it when he said it. But he was starting to wonder if he would be able to keep his word.
He blinked, tried to focus on the map he was studying, then found his thoughts drifting back to Nikki once again.
He knew she wasn’t happy. A spasm of guilt reverberated through him, and he shifted in his seat.
He still stood by his decision. Them being together was going to be safer for her than anything else.
The second Lucas made a move on the second-in-command’s wife, the entire pack would rise up to go after him.
That didn’t smother Jasper’s unease whenever he saw Nikki curled up on the couch, reading or working on her laptop.
Some of the frostiness in her demeanor had ebbed, but there was still a wall between them that he longed to break through.
Once again, he tried to focus, and once again, he found himself drifting. The cycle repeated itself over and over, his thoughts always eventually circling back to Nikki.
***
It was several more hours of finding nothing before night fell, and all four of them agreed to call it for the day. Jasper grabbed his jacket, nodded at Alice, Camden’s secretary, and strolled into the evening, heading straight to Nikki’s work.
He walked into the library, its high ceilings soaring high overhead, the dark wood giving the whole space a cozy feel despite its massive size. He craned his neck to look up the way he always did, eyes scanning the second-story balcony that wrapped all around the massive atrium.
Nikki was standing behind the circulation desk, talking to Amber. She was smiling, something Jasper had rarely seen. As he watched, Amber said something to her, and Nikki gave a soft laugh in response, her eyes crinkling. She had a beautiful smile.
He stayed where he was, not wanting to interrupt that small bit of cheer. Guilt began to resurface as he watched them.
Amber caught sight of him before Nikki. She elbowed Nikki, then nodded in his direction. Nikki followed her gaze. Her entire body stiffened, that smile evaporating, replaced by the usual stiff, uneasy composure that he had grown accustomed to, coupled with that neutral expression.
Still, he couldn’t miss the fire simmering in her gaze.
“Hi,” he said. “How are you ladies doing?”
Amber shrugged. “Same old, same old,” she said. “Nothing particularly interesting going on.”
“No angry patrons throwing books all over the place?”
Nikki’s mouth twitched despite herself. “Just once.”
Their eyes met. Jasper might have been imagining it, but he could have sworn he saw a spark there, some connection.
Then Nikki pulled her attention away again, and the spell was broken.
“Ready to go?” he asked Nikki.
“Give me a few minutes.” She gestured at the book cart. “I need to reshelve these. It shouldn’t take too long.”
With a nod, he spent the next few minutes wandering through the library, giving Nikki the space to finish her work. He browsed the mystery section, plucking a book from the shelf. He’d just begun reading the first page when Nikki appeared at his shoulder.
“I love that one,” she said. “It’s really good.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Really?” He turned the book over to look at the blurb, then shrugged. “I’ll check it out, then, since it’s recommended by an expert.”
He saw pink tint her cheeks, and she glanced away as if suddenly shy.
“Let’s go,” he said, tucking the book under his arm.
After he checked out the book, he and Nikki walked out and made their way into the cool evening air. Jasper turned right. Nikki frowned, twisting to glance behind her.
“Where are we going?” she asked. “Your house is that way.”
He hadn’t missed that she still referred to it as his house versus theirs.
“I thought it might be nice to shake things up,” he said. “I was going to take you out to dinner.”
“Oh.” Nikki blinked, not even bothering to hide her surprise. “Where were you thinking?”
“You like Italian, right? There’s a place not far from here that’s pretty good.” He pointed in the restaurant’s general direction.
She slowed, giving him a speculative look. Jasper slowed as well, turning to look at her, one eyebrow raised.
“What’s up?”
“It’s not Marconi’s, is it?”
“Something wrong with it?”
“No. It’s actually my favorite restaurant,” she said. “How did you know?”
He shrugged, debating telling her that he had seen her go in there after her shift on more than one occasion.
She would order takeout from there. In the end, though, he kept his mouth shut.
He doubted admitting to her just how much attention he paid to her before this all began would be beneficial at this point.
“I didn’t,” he said. “I guessed since you mentioned loving Italian, and this is the best in town, but I wasn’t sure.”
Nikki nodded, still regarding him with a new curiosity.
Marconi’s was a small restaurant, with fake vines crawling along the beige, stone-colored walls and low lighting. The tables were small and intimate, and the entire place had a cozy feel to it.
“So what’s the occasion?” she asked when they sat, as if she was expecting an ulterior motive.
“No occasion,” Jasper said. “I just figured you might want to go out to eat instead of having to deal with my slop.”
“Honestly, I kind of like your food,” she admitted, playing with her fork. Her eyes glanced up at Jasper, then flicked away. “You’re a good cook.”
“Glad to hear it,” Jasper said. He glanced around, then leaned forward as if preparing to share a secret. “In that case, the real reason is that I’m feeling really lazy today and don’t want to cook.”
She laughed, her head tilting back the way it had for Amber. When she met his eyes again, some of her caution around him had ebbed.
“You’re secret’s safe with me,” she said, eyes dancing.
They ordered a bottle of wine when the waiter dropped off a basket of fresh bread.
At first, their conversation came across as a bit stilted and uncomfortable, as if it were a muscle neither of them had stretched in a long time.
But after some brief small talk, it got easier.
Jasper asked about Nikki’s day, and she talked about an annoying patron who always complained about nonexistent late fees.
Then, after a moment’s hesitation, she asked him about the latest self-defense technique he’d taught during the training lessons, and he tried to go through some of the more technical jargon without trying to sound too bland, though she seemed to cling to every word.
From there, the conversation flowed to other things, and by the time they were on their second glass of wine and their entrees had appeared, no one would have expected there had been any discomfort between them in the first place.
“You said you were adopted,” he prompted during a segue.
He had asked her if she wanted to invite her family to the wedding, and she’d vehemently refused with such gusto, it had taken Jasper by surprise.
When he’d pressed her about it, she told him she was adopted and that she and her family were no longer close.
She nodded. “When I was little. Like five. I don’t really remember my real parents.”
“Did you like your foster parents?”
Her lips thinned. “No, not really. They weren’t…
” She trailed off, hesitating for a moment, then relented.
“They weren’t the best parents. Once they found out that I wasn’t going to be a shifter, they sort of lost all interest in me.
” Another pause. “It was hard, you know? They told me on more than one occasion that I was worthless. I wasn’t even entirely sure why they let me stick around if they hated me that much.
Because they certainly didn’t seem to have a high opinion of me. ”
Jasper snarled, his eyes narrowing. “In that case, they’re idiots.”
She blinked at him, head tilting. Then she laughed. It wasn’t a deep, full-belly laugh, but it was more than she had ever given him before.
“That’s putting it a bit mildly,” she said, her eyes sparkling. She gave him a brief smile, the most she had given him since the night he had saved her from Lucas, before sobering. “I haven’t spoken to them in years. When I walked out at eighteen, I never looked back.”
He grinned. “Good for you,” he said, then poked at his penne. “That isn’t as easy as people make it out to be. It requires a certain type of strength that not everyone has.”
She blinked again, as if she’d never considered this angle before. When she realized he was staring at her, waiting for a response, the pink that had been tinting her cheeks deepened to an almost brilliant red.
“I’m not sure if that’s right,” she said. “But thanks, anyway.”
“I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t think it was true,” he said. “You should know that by now.”
She glanced down, her hair creating a curtain and hiding her face. “Yeah, I’m starting to get that about you.” She pulled her head up, as if drawing herself out from some spell. “What about you?”
She sounded almost nervous, as if suddenly shy about asking about his private life. He wasn’t sure if he could blame her. Up until now, they hadn’t gotten particularly personal since that first morning when she had told him about Lucas.
“My mom and sister are off in our original pack,” he said. “I visit them every so often. My dad passed away right before I joined the military.”
“I’m sorry,” she said.
“Don’t be,” he growled, stabbing his fork down with more force than necessary. Then he saw the uneasy expression on her face and softened, sighing. “Sorry, I didn’t mean for that to come out that harsh. My father wasn’t… we didn’t get along. To be completely honest, he was an asshole.”
He remembered growing up, how his father always insisted he knew best, how he dictated whatever his mother and sister did. Whenever his mother had so much as tried to question those choices, he’d gone into a frenzy.
“I told you that I didn’t like it when men preyed on women and took advantage of them,” he said.
He pushed the sauce around on his plate with his fork, not glancing up.
When he did tear his gaze away from the plate, he found Nikki’s intense stare locked on him, as if she was seeing him in a new light.
“My father was one of those types of people. He insulted my mother and sister on a regular basis, and he controlled nearly every aspect of their lives—anything he could feasibly control, he’d find an excuse to do so.
I was too young to really be able to do anything about it.
” He gave a bitter smile. “Though that didn’t stop me from trying. I was stubborn even back then.”
“I’m shocked,” she teased, her lip tilting upward.
Jasper raised an eyebrow. “If you think I’m bad now, you should have seen me back then,” he said. “But it did stick with me. I hated not being able to defend them. My father was controlling and manipulative, and everything had to go his way.”
She tore off a piece of bread and dabbed it into the sauce. “Is that why you started training the women?”
He nodded. “I know it’s not exactly the same, my dad’s abuse and what I’m training you all to fight against, but it makes me feel like I’m at least helping in my own way.
” His lip twitched upward in amusement. My mother’s with a guy who actually deserves her.
My sister is in the same pack. Last time I visited, she was enjoying single life. ”
When he looked up, he saw Nikki regarding him with interest, her head tilted.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, wondering if he’d somehow said something wrong.
“Nothing,” she said speculatively. “It’s more than a lot of things about you suddenly make more sense.”
He raised an eyebrow. “I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing.”
“You confuse me sometimes, you know that?” she asked, though her tone was playful, her eyes sparkling.
He shrugged, then grinned. “I like keeping people on their toes.”
Her lips pursed. “You certainly achieve that. Because I still don’t know what to make of you after weeks of living with you.”
He shrugged. “Maybe that’s part of the fun,” he said, and flashed a smirk that she pretended didn’t ripple through her entire body.