Chapter 20
Autumn
I t is now three weeks after my Sawyer encounter, and I still haven’t gathered up the courage to call or message him.
Work is slow today, but it is midweek, and Wednesdays are usually our quietest days. It is pleasantly warm outside this morning, and I am struggling to stay awake.
“Go and read for a while, honey. We’re okay here for a couple of hours. I would appreciate you hanging around, though, in case it gets busy over the lunch shift,” Edith says over my shoulder.
“Are you sure, Edith? I will grab a coffee and sit on one of the benches in the square. I won’t be far away. I’ll keep an eye on the door. If it gets busy, I’ll come straight back in.” I beam at her and silently thank her as if she could read my thoughts.
“You’re an angel, Autumn. Go enjoy that sunshine for a while. Besides, there is a familiar-looking guy walking past out there, so it’s perfect timing!” She winks at me.
Sawyer.
Without trying to make it obvious that I’ve sprinted through the square to reach him, I follow hot on his heels. “Sawyer,” I say in almost a whisper. I reach out to touch his arm, and he turns to look at me, his eyes narrowing slightly. Jeez , he looks amazing today. Jeans that perfectly wrap around his huge thighs, an old, grey, dirtied-up tee, trucker hat, and work boots. There is sweat on his forehead. It looks like he is in the middle of a workday, and I realize I don’t know what he does for work or much about him.
His arm muscles pull the cotton taught as he puts his hands in his jeans pockets. He doesn’t even mean to be hot, but he should be illegal. He looks pissed. Again.
“Autumn,” he says, glowering at me. Then, with a firm nod of his head, he turns around to walk off again.
“Sawyer! Wait! Please.” He ignores me and continues to walk. So, I follow. “Please, Sawyer, stop. I want to talk to you.”
“Hmm, that’s strange. You want to have sex with me when you’re drunk, but you have my number, yet I haven’t heard from you at all. You could have called me at any time, but now you want to talk to me.” He scoffs back at me as he continues to walk, me following by his side. Okay, I probably deserved that.
“SAWYER! Stop acting like a petulant child!” I bark out at him. He stops and spins to face me. Amusement is on his face this time.
“I’m sorry that I acted so terribly. I had an incredibly bad night. I was drunk, I was assaulted, then you rejected me, and I’ve been too embarrassed to call you.” I groan and tuck my hair behind my ears. “But – there is also no excuse for the way you have treated me, Mr. Green . I have been getting the worst mixed signals from you. You’re playing with me, and I refuse to be a pawn in your game of chess anymore.” His face softens as I continue spouting my tirade. “You are hot one second, then cold the next. I wanted nothing to do with you. You stalked me, you followed me, you showed up at the park, the store, and even at my home. You practically forced yourself in. You came to my workplace when I was sitting in there on a day off, you were there when I was at the bar with Alice, then despite all of that, against my better judgement, when I should have called the police, I felt safe when you were there. You allowed that to happen.” The guilt on his face is unmistakable. “You know what – you’ve got what you wanted because you won’t hear from me again. I am so tired of this shit. There is nothing redeeming about you or the way you treat me, and I deserve better than whatever this mind fucking is, you sadistic prick.” I turn on my heels to leave.
I make it about ten steps before his hand wraps around the top of my arm as Sawyer spins me to face him. He looks in my eyes, and the desire in his matches my own. With one swift movement, he spins his hat to face backward, then bends forward to kiss me. It doesn’t feel like just any kiss. This is a time-stopping kiss. A kiss that doesn’t happen in real life. I try to speak, but he catches my words in his mouth, swallowing them down with each tender flick of his tongue. Running his hand along my shoulder and up my neck, he cups the back of my head. He continues kissing me with such tenderness that it felt just like he’s just stolen the air from my lungs, and I can no longer breathe. My legs wobble from pure adrenaline.
I squeeze my thighs together to dull the ache between them. I reach up to place my hands on his chest to steady myself as my breath hitches. His free hand wraps around the small of my back, pulling me further into him.
When reality rushed back in, his smell was the first thing I noticed. The leather, spice, and warmth of his body hit me in waves. I made a mental note to tell Alice that I was right. Sawyer is the most intense man I have ever met. Pulling away from me, his eyes burned into mine.
“Baby, you’re right. You do deserve better, and I can be whatever you want me to be. Or at least I can try. I have a lot of explaining to do.” Then rage fills his eyes. “Please know this, Autumn. If another man in this world laid a finger on you, I would hunt them to the ends of this earth. I am so, so sorry that I was not there when you needed a protector. Nobody, and I mean nobody, touches what is mine - and you - are fucking mine. ”
He presses his forehead to mine, and I squeeze my thighs together again, forcing away the ache.
I, Autumn Bethany Andrews, am done for.
“Please come for dinner. I want to cook for you,” I can’t get the words out fast enough, worried that if I didn’t ask him now then I never would.
“Sugar, I’ll come wherever you want me to.” He winks at me, his eyes sparkling.
Me: Soooooo. I saw Sawyer today. I am doomed. He kissed me with the fire of a thousand suns.
Alice: Yessss.
Me: He called me baby.
Alice: Oh damn.
Me: Twice.
Alice: Oh damnnnnn.
Me: He turned his hat backward before he kissed me.
Me: Oh, and he's coming for dinner tonight.
Alice: Wait until he calls you a good girl.
Me: *water emoji* *drooling emoji*
I am so nervous. The anticipation of seeing Sawyer tonight is too much to handle. As much as I feel safe with him, I am still completely aware of how little I know him, so Jed is staying here tonight. Jed seems to love Sawyer, but any funny business, and he’d castrate him with his teeth.
I love to cook, which settles my nerves, so I’ve decided to make pizza from scratch. It takes a long enough time for my mind to be occupied, so I am not thinking about how sick I feel. Why am I so nervous?
With the pizza bases ready to go, I go to get myself ready for the weirdest date of my life.
I decided to wear a matching underwear set this evening—a simple, plain black bra, and thong. Gazing into the mirror, I admire my form. The underwear set is basic, but it makes me feel good. The thong frames my ass perfectly. I’d love to think I’m going to get lucky tonight, but given how the rest of our interactions have gone, anything could happen, so I decide to play it safe with comfort and style. I have a simple pair of jean shorts that are short enough to show off my thighs and a low-cut black distressed tee.
Considering that I want to look like I’ve made almost no effort, it’s taken me two hours to get myself ready with the most casual outfit and makeup. I’d never let him know that, of course. I shimmy into the shorts and swipe a red lip stain across my lips. The doorbell rings, and my stomach somersaults inside of me. Trying not to run down the stairs because I don’t want to look as if I am falling over myself to get to him. I rush to the door. The attraction I feel towards this man is uncontrollable. I swing the door open, and I’m immediately hit with heady lust.
“Hey, Sugar.” A big grin spreads across his perfect, plump lips as I answer the door.
“Why didn’t you check the peephole?” He props himself against the door frame, raising an eyebrow at me.
“I did!” I lie.
“You wouldn’t be lying to me, would you?”
“Who, me? Never!” I grin, and I’m painfully aware of how his eyes move down my body, not missing a single inch of me. His Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows, and my mouth goes dry. He is wearing a white tee, an open blue check shirt over the top, black jeans and a pair of vans, and another trucker hat. It’s already on backward this time, and I know he was waiting for me. The backward hat is my kryptonite. Before I know it, I launch my arms around his neck, pull him down towards me, and press a kiss to his lips. Putting his hands on my waist, Sawyer pulls me closer to his body and kisses me back. A small moan escapes my lips as my soft body collides with his chiselled one. I can’t believe how much I want this man.
“I don’t know about you, but I am surprisingly hungry, Autumn. Maybe you could stop manhandling me so we can eat.” He smirks at me, and a low rumble escapes him in the form of a laugh, and I feel my cheeks burning like a lovesick teenager. I bit my bottom lip and drop my gaze to the floor. Embarrassed by my involuntary reaction to him.
“I’m sorry! I couldn’t resist the hat, Mr. Green.” I shrug and giggle as I stand aside and let him into my house. He kicks his shoes off in the hallway, and on cue, Jed is there to greet Sawyer as though he’s known him forever.
We are sitting across from each other at the dining table, eating pizza and drinking rum. I dare not sit close to him because I won’t be able to keep my hands to myself. Every time we are near, I feel electricity coursing through my veins. Although I feel like I know Sawyer, I know nothing about him at all. Deciding to strike up a ‘get-to-know-you’ conversation, I ask,
“Soooo-” I draw out the word “-I am going to ask you a series of questions, and you get to do the same. We know nothing about each other, and I want to get to know the man who has been following me. I think that’s fair. Don’t you?” I flash him a winning smile and slide another slice of pizza from the tray, and my eyes fixed on his.
It sounds outrageous that I am saying this out loud. Cooking dinner for a man who has quite literally stalked me. I can’t help but laugh at how we got here.
“What’s so funny?” He looks at me quizzically.
“Well, don’t you think it’s ridiculous that I am sitting here with a man who openly confessed to stalking me while cooking him dinner and playing a round of twenty questions?” I push the words out between giggles.
“I suppose it could sound ridiculous if you cared what people thought, of course. You stop feeling ridiculous when you don’t give a shit about other people’s opinions, Autumn.” He shrugs at me, running a hand through his beard. The veins that pop in the back of his hand doesn’t escape my attention. How is everything about him sexy?
“I don’t mind looking ridiculous for a night with you, though,” he says as he reaches across the table and runs his thumb up the skin of my forearm. A touch that I feel everywhere. My eyes flick down and follow his thumb. I swallow and chew my bottom lip.
“Start your line of questioning then, ma’am. I’m ready!”