22
As I give thorough hello hugs to every touch-heavy wolf I know, Noah lazes back into his chair beside me. I can’t stop gazing at his sharp profile, softened by his plump lips. They”re pinker than usual after crying earlier. The second he catches me staring, Noah melts into a gentle smile.
God, my heart. Just that smile makes me feel like everything will be okay.
I lean against his side, and he wraps an arm around me, stabilizing me against him. I hum contentedly.
But when the Elders finally arrive and the meeting hasn”t started, I look around to see who”s still missing.
I turn to Noah. “Where’s your Luna?”
Noah looks me up and down with furrowed brows, then scans the room. Then he softens. “O-oh, I guess you’re right. My mom isn’t here yet.”
My stomach flips. Did he just look to me first like I’m already his Luna?
Noah suddenly won’t look me in the eyes, turning away to fiddle with his chipped chair seat. Our bond gives him away; giddy embarrassment races through his frantic wolf.
I break into giggles, no matter how serious the atmosphere. Noah’s smile bursts across his face, his head still bowed. Our shared laughter lifts my heart ten feet.
“I love you, my shy Alpha.”
“I love you too, my sweet Omega.”
Once Lilian arrives, our warm, knitted hands are the only thing stabilizing us through an otherwise stressful meeting. Noah debriefs Lilian and the Elders about last night’s Mason incident. Everyone’s faces sink lower the more Noah describes, the atmosphere plummeting with them.
Finally, Noah announces his conclusion on the situation’s consequences. “After this latest stunt, I want to send out an order to hold 24/7 surveillance on Mason Hart.”
The collective scent shifts to unease, and my stomach groans in response.
Okay, that wasn”t just a groan. More like a screech. Everyone turns to look, and I flush in embarrassment as I give the Elders an awkward smile. “Sorry. Please, continue.”
Noah’s tense posture softens into threatened laughter, his eyes closing and lips bitten. God, I fucking love you.
I love you too. Sorry for interrupting your meeting.
Trust me, I needed that. Thank you—and your adorable stomach.Noah has to scrub his jaw, containing his grin as the Elders charge ahead in the discussion.
But I allow myself a smile. After how upset Noah was this afternoon, his relaxed shoulders are a welcome relief.
Unfortunately, the Elders aren”t on the same page.
“How the hell are you going to justify 24/7 surveillance?” Elder Alpha Frank growls. “Are you sure he doesn’t have a point about acting like a dictator? What are you going to do, put up surveillance on every wolf who challenges you?”
Noah allows the board to voice their fears, but they trail off when he shakes his head. “I have reason to believe Hart is stalking our future Luna too. If he has any intention of hurting Aliya, I need to know.”
My stomach gurgles even louder this time, but it”s not funny to me. Noah drapes his hand on the back of my neck.
Fuck, I”m sorry, that came out completely insensitive. Are you feeling okay with this conversation, sweet Omega?
When he strokes my mark with his calming, protective scent, I do everything in my power not to sigh in bliss. Yes, I’m okay. As long as I’m with you.
Noah takes a deep, soothing breath at my words, and my heart aches with love for him. This is stressful as hell, but being together makes anything manageable. This last month has proven that.
“I believe you, Alpha.” Yasmine steps in with the mediation she does best, her clear, elegant voice sending a burst of Noah’s relief through our bond. “And I also know the Elders have a point. We don’t want any reason for mutiny on our hands. Do you have solid proof he’s stalking her? For the official side of things?”
Noah shifts on his feet, dropping his head. “I haven”t seen what he”s doing outside of when I”ve seen him challenge me. So nothing I can prove is separate from dominance challenges towards me just yet.” His expression hardens, his scowl burning a hole into the floor. “I just don’t like that he was trying to stop me from meeting my mate at first. And the way he looks at her feels off, I—”
“You sound like a loving Alpha, protecting his mate. Which is wonderful to see, truly,” Elder Beta Terrence chuckles. “But you need more proof than that.”
Yasmine crosses her arms. “I agree with our Alpha, though; Mason is super suspicious. Especially with his unwillingness to show his human face.”
Elder Terrence nods. “Yes, that is odd. Surely someone here must”ve seen his human form in the past?”
Elder Frank grumbles. “His adult human form, you mean. Most of us saw his kid form.”
The room steeps in silence. Noah tenses, and Yasmine steals a glance at him. They must be referring to when Alpha Ritchie banished Mason’s dad, Jack Hart, from Greenfield.
But Dave raises his hand in the corner. “I’ve seen Mason Hart’s adult form. But I don”t have a picture of him, or anything. Like most wolves, he doesn”t have any social media I can find, either.”
“So there”s nothing that stood out about his human form? Nothing either identifying or that he might find embarrassing about his appearance?” Elder Terrence asks.
Dave shrugs. “He”s just another white, blonde dude, a bit bigger than me but no tattoos or scars I can remember, or anything.”
“Then why would he hide it?” Elder Aaron frowns.
Yasmine releases one hand from her tightly crossed arms to rub her temple. “When I got there last night, he was refusing specifically to show Noah his human face. And being pretty offensive about it.”
Elder Aaron hums. “That”s extremely strange, and annoying, sure, but being a nuisance isn”t enough to be put on surveillance.”
Rainn chimes in with a protective hand gripping her brother’s arm. “But he”s clearly hiding something, Elder! Don”t you think that”s suspicious?”
“I agree, the refusal to shift is the most suspicious out of everything here. We could use that as a reason, Alpha... If you have any idea of what he”s hiding.”
We all turn to Noah, hoping he has something.
Noah’s eyes flicker between every one of us, his brows knitted and chest puffed. But he sighs, dropping my gaze to scrub his forehead.
“I don”t know. I”ve been trying to think of one of the hundreds of unsolved crimes it could be. But also where I”d recognize him, on the spot—since why else would he hide his face from me? I just can”t think of anything. If this was the case of an unsolved offense already on my mind, I would”ve sniffed him out immediately.”
Elder Frank scowls. “Then, what? You”re truly doing this for no reason? Going on a feeling?”
“Are we going to ignore the elephant in the room?” Lilian mutters in the corner.
Noah erupts with defensive, panicked emotions, sending icy anxiety through my veins. I grip my chair, struggling to grasp what Lilian could be talking about.
“He’s not Jack,” Noah snaps.
No one speaks. Hell, no one moves.
“And I can’t arrest Mason for being related to him,” Noah growls.
My heart ticks into my throat, tempted to cower from Noah. I’ve never seen my mate like this.
Yasmine’s clicking, irritated tongue is the first to snap everyone out of our frozen state. “Well, we all know Mason’s asshole father, and even though we have to treat them as different people, Mason does sound like just as much of an Alpha-domination cultist.”
Elder Terrence sighs. “But Alpha Noah is right: we have a duty to be fair to every pack member, and Mason hasn”t physically acted on his beliefs. Not enough to banish him, like Jack.”
“And I don”t plan on letting it go that far,” Noah hisses.
The air thins with Noah’s rampaging pheromones, bringing on a heavy silence.
Eventually, Elder Aaron mutters out his thoughts. “I understand your bias against these Alpha men, but they”re still your constituents—”
“I don”t give a fuck,” Noah booms. “I don”t want to hear a single other Omega was hurt by these domination fuckers in my own pack. I”m not waiting until something happens again to act!”
Noah”s voice has an edge to it I’ve never heard before. The tension in the room rises, everyone avoiding Noah”s eyes. I”m physically shaking, unsure how to process my mate’s behavior. But everything he’s saying sounds perfectly logical; we should be upset about wolves abusing other wolves.
So why is everyone acting so weird? What am I missing here?
It sounds like someone here didn’t act quickly enough on Jack. With the horrors I know Noah witnesses, often daily, what did he have to witness to make him react like this? I’m positive Jack abused Mason’s mom, but why wouldn’t Alpha Ritchie listen to her? Or was it that he did, and these wolves around me didn’t believe her, just like no authority believed me?
Acid crawls up my throat as my shoulders rise. My heart pounds so rapidly that I’m tempted to hide.
But the more I overthink, the more Noah’s anxiety skyrockets. I jump to my feet, afraid he’s about to have an anxiety attack.
Noah backs away from us quickly, holding out a halting palm. “I’m fine, I’m fine. Give me a second.”
Turning around, Noah takes a few deep breaths with rapid strokes of his hair. All I can see is immense stress threaded throughout his shoulders, winding them so tight that it looks like Noah has to fight to expand his taut ribcage.
He’s right; Mason is causing immense, unnecessary stress for all of us. With how volatile Mason has been, his actions could catch up with his words before we’re prepared to stop him. When he confronted us last, there were far more than the ten to fifteen Alpha-domination cultists Noah mentioned he had his eye on, a horde of wolves ready to back Mason up. And if Mason’s at the top of their miniature hierarchy, we need to figure out how to handle him as soon as possible.
My stomach rolls, millions of possibilities crossing my mind of what Mason could be hiding. But I can’t get something out of my head. That phrase Mason used as he walked away: maybe I do, maybe I don’t.
I’m almost certain he stalked me enough to find out I have OCD.
Oh, fuck. This might be our missing key.
But can I trust these wolves to share something so intimate about me, right after I learned they might not be as safe as they seem?
As I let out a shaky gasp for air, Noah rushes back to my side with a sorrowful ache in his eyes. He leans in to nuzzle my cheek, softening the harsh tone he left hanging in this eerily silent room. “It’s going to be okay. I have every intention to keep you safe.”
I swallow hard, softening to a whisper. “It’s not just that. I think I have some evidence.”
No matter how quiet my voice is compared to the room’s agitated hum, I hold more weight here than I ever have.
All eyes are on me, listening intently.
Damn wolf hearing. I should”ve mindlinked Noah instead. I don’t know if I want to tell the whole world I have OCD.
What if they no longer believe I’m able to be Luna? If they have deep-rooted biases, I won’t be able to defend myself; I’ve seen OCD wildly misunderstood and miscategorized too many times to believe they would understand me. They might even play it off as acting nice in the moment, but believe I’m “crazy” once I leave the room. Hell, they could even lock me up.
I swallow hard, struggling to parse my thoughts. I”m already triggered enough to have no idea what’s intrusive and what’s a valid concern.
Or maybe they’re valid concerns, regardless, and they don’t need to be parsed. Maybe the real problem is that I’m only looking at one half of my “what ifs” again.
What if this is a group who will finally listen to me? What if I’m making too many assumptions about what happened in the past, and these Lycans could be more understanding than most humans?
Now that I think through it slowly, they’re only asking Noah difficult questions to help him find a way to achieve what he wants: stopping Mason. They don’t want someone like Jack to succeed in their harm again, either.
Maybe they didn’t act quickly enough in the past, but maybe they’ve learned. They’re acting now.
It doesn’t excuse the past, but it does help me feel safer.
My shoulders loosen, although my heart still races. I’ve never shared my OCD diagnosis with a room full of adults. I’m not sure I’ll have to, but I’ve seen many people react to needing a therapist the same way—questioning if I’m stable enough to run my own life, let alone others’ fates. In reality, I might even have more tools to manage life stressors than they do thanks to therapy.
But Lilian grabs my hand, scooting closer. “Allow us to protect you. Share your thoughts.”
Yasmine doubles down, reaching over the table to rub my arm.
With Noah behind me, bending to kiss my cheek as he releases wave after wave of his protective scent, my shoulders turn into mush. I drop my neck for him, presenting my mark.
His breath brushes my neck. Goosebumps climb my arms with my body’s muscle memory of his affections there.
Just before he bends to lick the hell out of my mark—his wolf hungrily courting mine in our bond with hard nips—Lilian clears her throat.
“Noah. Pay attention.”
“S-sorry. My wolf is—” Noah’s anxious wolf slinks against mine in our bond, attempting to calm himself. “Share only what you want to, sweet Omega. We’re all here to support you however we can.”
Looking around the room, I have to stifle tears. He’s right. I really feel like I have a huge family now. Maybe I don’t have to hold this alone, either.
And maybe I don’t have to share everything, just like Noah said. Maybe I can trust them just enough to help us all feel safer.
“I-I go to therapy every week,” I mutter, testing the waters. When no one seems to bat an eye, I speak up. “And it’s a very specific type of therapy. One that uses the phrase ‘maybe, maybe not,’ to accept uncertainty in life. Especially ‘maybe I will, maybe I won’t.’”
Yasmine’s eyes widen. “Oh, fuck. And Mason said, ‘Maybe I do, maybe I don’t,’ when Noah accused him of having something to hide.”
I swallow hard. The absolute silence grates my nerves.
When it doesn’t change after 30 seconds, my voice comes out choppy and weak. “I-I could be wrong, but it felt directed towards me. It was just so specific. So pointed. And it was the only time he ever spoke to me, saying something only I’d feel uncomfortable from.”
As Noah jerks away from us, a burst of his raging scent doubles my breathing rate.
“Fuck. I don’t like that at all. Not at all.”
Everyone jumps up with him, chairs tossed aside in alarm.
Elder Terrence manages to keep some of his cool, holding out a steadying hand. “Wait, Alpha. Let’s go through this carefully to cover all our bases.”
But Noah isn’t the only stressed wolf. I’m suddenly crowded by protective-yet-stressed scents, twisting my stomach.
Rainn loops around Noah to join my side, cuddling against me. “Oh, Goddess, are you okay? I believe you, proof or not.”
“Let’s all take a deep breath. I believe we can find enough proof with this,” Elder Terrence says. He turns to me, softening his voice. “Future Luna, how do you know he isn’t just reading about your treatment somewhere on social media?”
“I don”t post anymore. And I haven’t told anyone except Noah and my best friend about where I go for therapy and why. Not even my ex knows I have this diagnosis, or my parents before they passed. There’s no other way for Mason to find out because—” Dammit. If I remind Noah that Steven was the one who made me so cautious, he”s really going to flip. “I-I”m a very private person.”
Growling, Noah paces behind me. “No, I don’t like this.”
Elder Aaron takes a step towards us. “Alpha—”
Noah’s incisors gleam as he snaps. “This isn’t just a protective Alpha thing! This is serious. She goes there the same time and day every single week. It’s too easy to track.” He struggles to catch his breath, letting out a pained whine. “If he hurts her while she’s alone there, or kills her, I-I’ll lose—”
“He hasn’t even touched her before. How do you know he’d go so far as to kill her?”
“We’re hoping to have a baby, and he wants to end my lineage. He already tried to intercept us when we met. What if he kills her when she’s eventually pregnant?”
Oh, God. That’s a disturbing thought—like Noah just blurted out my intrusive thoughts out loud.
Oh. Oh, shit. He’s having a PTSD episode.
I spin to track him, awkwardly holding out my hands as worried wolves scurrying between us separate me from my mate. I’m so frazzled by the chaos surrounding Noah that I don’t know what to do or say. How to help. The pained, rippling ache on Noah’s features make me want to sob; I know how awful it feels. How much it feels like you might lose your life, you’re so scared, and I hate that I might have to just let him suffer through it.
Noah slips into panicked whimpers. “I-I think I’d die if he kills her, I’d want to—”
Before I can rush to Noah’s side, he’s swarmed with wolves gripping him from all angles.
“Alpha, slow down. We can have someone with our future Luna at all times for her safety.” Elder Terrence grabs Noah’s arm, but Noah shrugs everyone off, backing off with rapid steps.
“No! Why should she lose all her autonomy because of someone else’s behavior? Hart needs to face actual consequences.” Noah grips his head as everyone else gapes at his rising meltdown.
Anger bubbles in my core, threatening to burst.
Then it hits me: I’ve been reining my wolf back, but she’s been clawing to be let out this whole time.
Noah taught me something huge about her through the mattress. Her anger isn’t irrational. It’s to protect us.
As I set her free, my voice comes out sharp. “Excuse me. I have something to say.”
I’m already standing, but I gather the room’s attention with their collective flinch.
Shit. My Alpha-weirdness must be showing.
But I’m too upset to care what they’ll think of me, fists clenched at my sides. “This whole conversation is pointless. Why aren’t we talking about Noah’s health in all this? He’s already being stalked!”
The Elders gape at me.
But Yasmine, Dave, and Rainn nod their heads along with me, meeting each other”s eyes.
“I don’t care if he’s supposed to be the strongest wolf here, no one should have to be okay with being stalked. We’re all sitting here, acting like it’s totally acceptable, just because some random guy is power-hungry. But Noah has already beaten Mason multiple times. There’s no reason Noah should have to tolerate this.”
Noah’s breath restarts a few times, shaking as he sputters out, “I-I’m okay, I—”
Yasmine scowls. “No you’re not. Our future Luna is right, this is barbaric.”
Then a voice speaks up that I’ve hardly heard from this meeting.
Lilian’s monotone, quiet voice stills the room. “Alphas deserve protection too. We all do. And Noah provides that protection for us. The least we could do is provide it back.”
My eyes bulge. Lilian just defended Noah.
It’s about time.
But my heart tears into shreds as Noah’s breaks. “I-I’m fine. I don’t need reminding that you think I’m w-weak, Mom.”
Her stoic stare dissolves into disgust. “Are you serious? Now you’re mad at me for having your back? After all those times you’ve been upset with me for—”
Noah points at the door, his breath rapid and shaky.
Lilian rises to leave without another word.
I shrink where I stand, guilt crushing my breath for bringing this all up. With one look at my cowering stance, Noah dissolves into guilt.
“I-I’m sorry,” he rasps.
“It’s—”
“No. It’s not okay. And...” Noah shakes his head. “I’m sorry for more than that. That everyone here didn’t have a proper goodbye to your last Alpha, and you all just got stuck with my bullshit. I wanted to work on it more before I took charge—go back to an outpatient thing to never act like this again—but I ran out of time. I ran o-out of time. I couldn’t even give Dad a retirement to enjoy before he was fucking shot, and now—”
My favorite Elder, Beta Terrence, comes to the rescue with a comforting hand on Noah’s shoulder. “Alpha Noah, no one here blames you for what happened to Alpha Ritchie—”
“It’s fine!” Noah shouts. He winces, lowering his voice to where we can barely hear him, as if he’s trying to cancel it out. “You can. I”m fine.”
No one takes a breath as Noah struggles not to crumble before the most important people in his pack.
“You’re not fine,” I say. “And that’s okay.”
Panic overwhelms Noah’s eyes, blocking him from accepting my words. In my heart, I know he desperately wants to. I could feel it the second I spoke.
I steady my voice. “If no one can accept you have actual emotions, they shouldn’t expect you to care the way you do. You have an incredible heart, Alpha. It’s sensitive in the most beautiful way because that’s how it protects us. And even if no one else here wants to protect it back, I still will. I will always protect you.”
It wasn’t what I intended, but Noah’s wall breaks at my words. My heart snaps as he buries his eyes into his palms, his shoulders shaking through the start of heavy, gut-shuddering tears.
“Oh, Noah—” I hold my breath as every wolf in the room rises at once, circling my mate.
Noah’s emotions ripple into fear, and I gasp.
Oh, God, what’s going to happen? Is someone going to take advantage of his vulnerability? Challenge him right here?
My heart sprints and my claws extend, ready to defend him.
But then, one by one, each wolf nuzzles against Noah. Rubbing their comfort along his sides, stomach, arms, and back, they soothe my mate.
I cover my lips, but my tears slip on their own. The whole room smells like love. Adoration. Gratitude.
Noah’s silent tears escalate into soft weeping.
I wiggle my way in, pressing myself against his overheated body until he frantically squeezes me to his chest. As he hides his face into my neck, I brush soft kisses onto his mark, each kiss laced with a nurturing scent I can’t contain. Everyone’s hands are on him, their scents rising with mine until the comforting smell softens every muscle I own.
“We love you, Alpha. Take it in, my love,” I whisper.
He shakes his head. “I need to protect you. All of you.”
“You already are. But you’re not a god, and we shouldn’t expect you to be. It’s okay to be protected and loved too. Really, it is.”
Noah squeezes me with his arms wrapped as tight as they can be, letting out a soft sob against my shoulder.
Elder Terrence smiles. “You two are really something special. This reminds me of the days Takahiro was here.”
Elder Aaron chuckles. “You’re right. He’d always melt Ritchie into a puddle when Ritch was convinced he was too invincible to have needs.”
My heart aches with Noah’s at this news, but I crave so much more.
“Really? My dad would do that?” I ask.
“Yes. And Ritchie would let him.” Elder Aaron chuckles. “Takahiro used to laugh at how much Ritchie secretly loved it when we all swarmed him with affection like this. We just didn’t think Noah felt comfortable enough to let us in just yet.”
I kiss Noah’s panic away, unable to resist slipping my tongue against his mark.
Noah shudders, finally revealing his swollen face to meet my eyes. “You’re right, I wasn’t comfortable enough yet. My mate has helped me beyond words.” His voice is raw and soft, but it stirs avalanches of love for him in my heart. “I can’t let anything happen to her.”
The pain in his voice breaks me.
But the hands surrounding us lift my heart back up, steadying Noah’s soul on its feet with it.
“We won’t. We have both of your backs,” Elder Frank says.
“And I think it”s safe to say we”re in agreement about surveillance,” Elder Terrence says.
With a collective hum of approval from the Elders, Noah lets out a tremendous sigh against my neck.
When we get home, Noah is too exhausted to eat. He stumbles to bed while I reheat leftovers, keeping the lights dim.
Within 15 minutes, I shovel my food into my mouth and join Noah in bed. He stirs in his sleep, just for me—pulling me to his chest and draping himself over me until we’re intermeshed.
Neither of us have spoken much since we left the Pack Safety meeting. We don’t need to. I can feel how much he”s still processing today, but I can also see it on his face. Even in his sleep, there’s a faint, agonized strain to his eyelids.
I trace his bare back with long, sweeping motions, mesmerized by the way my gentle touch loosens his every muscle. As his breaths slow back into sleep, I hold his head to my heart, hoping he can feel how much I love him.
I love sleeping cuddled up with him. Instead of getting old, it just gets better every single day. He feels like home.