Chapter Fifteen
The Past
Elsie
Clayton has been giving me hints nonstop for the past weeks. He planned something for my sixteenth birthday and I have tried every way to get him to tell me what it is.
I put on my outfit as the snow falls over the bedroom window, coating it with the white winter.
I run my fingers through my silky strands, untangling the knots as I look at myself over the mirror one last time.
My eyes cast to the small envelope I am holding firmly in my hand over my chest. I have asked Clayton to write me a letter for my birthday and I will write him one as well, since we have shared our birthday for years, it will be our gifts for each other, then we will read this letter again when we get old and want to remember our memories when we were young.
Clayton agreed and promised he will give me the letter today.
I’m nervous to see his reaction when he reads the one I wrote for him. Doubt sparks in me as my mind makes up all the scenarios that could go wrong, but I hold my head high and take a deep breath.
A rock hits my window as I smile, walking closer towards it as I see Clayton standing in the snowy front yard with his hands in his pockets.
He looks up at me with a smirk as I roll my eyes.
He gives me a wink and walks to the front door.
He always preferred to sneak in the house, but lately he likes to let me know that he is here before ringing the doorbell.
I open my bedroom door with a last glance at myself in the mirror then descend the stairs.
My mom’s voice enthusiastic as she pulls Clayton in a warm hug, he is now taller than her. “Happy birthday, Clayton.” he smiles slightly and pats her back. I know Clayton took a while to get accustomed to the motherly love that my mom enjoys giving him.
“Thank you, Annette.”
His eyes turned to me as his lips curled up in a genuine smile. I run to him and wrap my arms around his neck as his arms embrace me. I take in his familiar scent and smile as I pull back.
“Are you ready to go?”
I nod excited, he holds my hand in his as we head out of the house.
Our footprints in the thick white snow decorate our way. The wind hits against our faces as we walk through the fog. The tree branches are now empty from the leaves as they stand alone.
“So, you still won't tell me where we are going?” Clayton chuckles at my attempt, shaking his head as he looks at me. “No, have some patience, mon ange.”
I sigh rolling my eyes, but I can't help hiding my excitement.
Clayton is the best friend I always dreamed of having.
He notices all the details about the things I love.
His gifts and constant presence in every part of my life, supporting me.
I never showed him how much I appreciate his existence in my life, or how much he means to me.
I hope the letter shows him exactly what he means to me.
He stops walking and turns to face me. “We are close, close your eyes.”
I close my eyes and feel his hands hold mine gently in his as he leads me to nowhere.
“Almost there.”
I try to hear anything that indicates where we are but I'm only met with silence. We stop suddenly as Clayton lets go of my hands and stands behind me. His breath grazes my ear as he whispers. “Happy birthday, mon ange.”
I open my eyes and gasp, covering my mouth.
The most beautiful view stands before us, a frozen lake surrounded by snow and trees.
My eyes widen when I notice the thousands of my favorite daisies petals, scattered over the snow.
My head turns to Clayton as he watches my awe in pride. “Clayton, this is– so beautiful.”
My eyes tear up as I throw myself into his arms, hugging him tightly as his sweater soaks up my tears of joy.
His hand strokes down my hair. “Mon ange, this is only the beginning.” He pulls back slightly and opens his backpack.
He pulls out two pairs of purple skating shoes and I scream in excitement.
He laughs, shrugging. “You wanted to try skating, so let me see your moves.”
I take the shoes from him and put them on as fast as I can, he kneels down to fasten the laces to his satisfaction as I hold onto his shoulders. Once he is done, I walk slowly to the lake as he keeps his hands on my waist, balancing me.
I step onto the ice and glide forward as he lets me go slowly. I draw swirls onto the ice as I glide from left to right, almost falling twice.
“Look at you, a professional already.” He stands on the edge of the lake with his hands crossed over his chest, amusement sparks in his eyes, but I can see the hint of admiration.
I wink at him which results in a smirk onto his face as I glide, raising one leg into the air. The wind brushing my hair as I close my eyes, feeling the freedom in the quiet nature.
I dance through the ice, swaying my arms in the air as Clayton watches me live peacefully. My eyes meet his in unspoken words as my lips curl up in a smile. He smiles back at me as I read his lips when he mouths. “Fly, mon ange.”
Clayton
My heart beats rapidly as I haven't been able to take my eyes off Elsie, the snow, the ice, and the fog matches her white hair, she swirls through the ice in graceful moves as if she owns the whole town.
Pride fills me that she is enjoying her birthday with me. I look down at the letter she gave to me to read as I grin. I haven't written her one, since I wanted to tell her in person what I have been wanting to say for so long.
Elsie Beaumont, I have been your best friend since you were eight years old, and I have loved you more every single day from the moment I saw those ice blue eyes.
I recited the line all night, the line that has burdened me for years.
Loving her was the cure that healed all of my darkness slowly.
She showed me the meaning of feeling something.
I have done everything I can to show her that I could be the one deserving of her heart, and I wish she would be mine, in every way possible.
That I don't have to hide how my heart aches for her.
I look back at Elsie as she grins at me, jumping a bit in the air then lands back down.
I zone out, imagining how she would look when I tell her all my bottled up feelings, the way her eyes will widen when I murmur how much I have wanted to kiss her, the way she would lean in to wrap her lips with mine then pull away with a smile and her cheeks flushed in a perfect hue.
“Clayton!” Her cry out alarms me out of my day dreaming.
My heart stops and the letter falls from my hands when I see what’s happening in front of me. The ice cracks, breaking in the middle as I watch Elsie fall down into the lake in a blur of white, her arms stretched towards me and her eyes wide in fear.
My brain shuts down as I find myself sprinting over towards her. I fall onto my knees when I see her body sinking down the ice cold water.
“Elsie!”
I scream out as I throw my torso down into the water, grabbing the edge of her sweater and pulling her up, desperately.
Her body falls onto my lap as I cradle her head in the crook of my arm. Her body is shaking uncontrollably, her eyes looking up into mine, unblinking.
“It’s okay, you're safe.” I murmur as I wrap her in my arms as tight as possible, trying to warm her freezing cold body.
She is having a seizure.
My hands shake as I try to think of all the ways I can help her but there is a blank fog in my mind that I can't get rid of.
Think Clayton.
I press my fingers over her pulse in her neck. The faint heartbeats slowing down.
“No, Elsie, stay with me.” I press my forehead onto hers as my eyes well up with tears.
“Someone, help! Please!” I keep screaming till my voice turns hoarse. I press her close to my chest as I sob uncontrollably, feeling helpless.
I failed to protect her.
“Mon ange, please, stay with me. Don’t leave me, please.”
Her eyes turn hollow as the soft blue eyes that I have grown up to love turns gray, curtained with her white lashes.
“Elsie!”
Her body falls limp in my embrace as her dead eyes zone on mine. I wait for any recognition or that beautiful joy to stare up at me, or her lips to tilt up in that smile I look forward to every day.
She lets out her last breath and I press my cheek onto her lips, letting her last life source graze me.
“Mon ange.” I plead hoarsely as tears run down my eyes, coating over her lifeless face.
I tilt my head up into the sky and let out a gut wrenching scream to the cruel world.