Chapter 18
PAUL
My worlds had collided.
Drinking with Elliot and Lewis like I’d done for the past few years on a Saturday night but now Holly was with us. We sat in the bar that overlooked the rink, music in the background, a lively weekend atmosphere around us as all four of us drank a beer.
‘So, has our Paul changed much since you last saw him?’ Elliot asked.
Holly’s red lips parted in a smile as she cradled her beer.
She had removed her jacket and wore a red jumper that matched her lipstick, finishing the look with jeans and boots.
I tried not to think that she looked cute but it was impossible not to.
A few men dropped glances in her direction so I knew I wasn’t the only one who’d noticed.
‘He was always annoyed he didn’t have much facial hair so that’s definitely changed,’ she joked.
I thought about what Willow, Daisy and Sabrina had said in the café about Holly preferring men who didn’t have a beard. I wondered what Holly’s exes had looked like.
‘But this hasn’t changed…’ She reached out to tug the edge of my beanie.
‘He wore them back then?’ Elliot asked, shaking his head. He was always telling me they were not at all fashionable, as if I cared about that.
‘I have a confession – they are my fault,’ Holly said, holding her hands up in defence. ‘I bought Paul his first one.’
‘Holly!’ Elliot and Lewis cried out while she giggled.
‘I feel naked without one,’ I said with a shrug, wondering if she remembered telling me that I looked cute in the one she’d got me for my birthday.
I’d kept on wearing it until it became part of me.
I suppose like Holly had become part of me.
I took a long gulp of beer and told myself to stop getting soppy.
‘They suit you,’ Holly said quietly.
‘Has Holly changed?’ Lewis asked me then.
‘She didn’t wear glasses,’ I said. ‘But she always towered over the rest of the girls at school.’
‘They used to call me Holly-Long-Legs,’ she added with an eye roll. She touched her glasses. ‘My eyesight got worse after university. I can’t bear to put contacts in.’
‘They suit you,’ I told her.
She smiled. ‘Yeah?’ She sipped her beer as Elliot told us a story about how he was teased at school for liking a cheesy pop band. ‘Kids can be cruel,’ Holly told him. ‘They were just jealous of your good taste, I bet.’
‘I wish I’d known you in those days,’ Lewis told his husband. ‘You two were lucky to have each other,’ he added to me and Holly.
‘Apart from Paul, school sucked quite a lot of the time for me. The last two years anyway. Willow said Birchbrook is a real community now but it wasn’t always like that.’
I leaned back in my chair and thought about it.
‘She’s right, things changed when Taylor took over as our mayor; she’s big on community spirit and we have lots of town events.
Willow has added to them on the farm too.
Plus, word spread about how pretty the town looks through the seasons and all the events we put on so we get a lot more visitors nowadays.
What did Sabrina tell me? Oh yeah Birchbrook is “Instagrammable” and big on TikTok, apparently.
I have no social media but I’ll take her word for it. ’
‘Paul is such a technophobe, he only uses his phone to call people or send a text, no apps on it at all,’ Elliot informed Holly.
‘Who wants to read about my life? I work in the café, that’s it.’
‘You skate really well,’ Elliot pointed out. ‘You can fix anything and that apartment of yours is gorgeous. Not to mention your baking and drink-making skills. And how you’ve broken half the hearts in town.’
‘He has?’ Holly raised an eyebrow. ‘I saw a woman trying to get his attention on the ice earlier.’
‘That’s his ex, Rach,’ Lewis said as I shot him a glare for being such a gossip. He ignored me as usual. ‘He definitely broke her heart.’
‘And then there was Amy…’ Elliot said, tilting his head as he ran through my exes. ‘Who else? Rebecca was already planning their wedding—’
‘Can we stop?’ I groaned, interrupting him.
‘You’re nuts, both of you. I haven’t broken any hearts.
Things just didn’t work out.’ I wasn’t sure if I was lying exactly.
None of them had told me I’d broken their hearts.
Rach had told me she loved me but when I couldn’t say it back, things ended pretty quickly.
I guessed if I’d told her I felt the same, she would want to get back together and build a life with me. I couldn’t lie, though.
‘What about you, Holly, is there someone waiting for you back in the city?’ Elliot asked.
‘He has no boundaries,’ I said to her quickly. ‘You don’t need to tell them anything.’
She smiled. ‘It’s fine. No, I’m single.’
Elliot and Lewis exchanged a look that I tried to ignore. But I couldn’t help but feel relieved she’d not found the love of her life. I took another sip from the bottle to distract myself.
‘We better get to dinner,’ Lewis said to Elliot. ‘It’s been lovely getting to know you, Holly. Maybe we can get you on the ice soon.’
‘You’d have to get me drunk first,’ she replied. She jumped up and hugged each of them. Their easy, quick affection pleased me. I was glad to see they all liked each other. Elliot and Lewis said goodbye then left us alone.
‘I’m starving,’ Holly declared then.
‘Do you have dinner plans? Or we could stay and get another drink and some food?’
Her face lit up, which made me smile. ‘Let’s do it! Then maybe I’ll beat you at pool again.’ She raised her eyebrow in challenge that reminded me of the past. It should have made me smile but my stomach dropped a bit to remember how things had been between us back then.
‘That never happened!’ I said with a shake of my head but I couldn’t match her smile.
Holly had another beer but I switched to Coke and we both had a burger.
Then we played pool and I beat her easily although she claimed the drink had impaired her skills.
It was a fun night but I felt like there was a slight tension between us.
We kept our conversation light. Holly told me how she was getting on with the winter wonderland; I told her about the events Birchbrook put on and how Willow had saved her farm from closure by creating a pumpkin patch and we talked about our friends: her best friend in the city, Georgia, and I told her about being best man at Elliot and Lewis’s wedding.
We seemed to be avoiding the subjects of our past and our ten years apart, though.
When we left the ice rink and got into my car, it was the first time all night it had been quiet around us. We were alone out in the car park. We sat in the car and before I turned on the engine, Holly looked at me in the semi-darkness.
‘I had a great time tonight, Paul. It was like the old days. I’m glad you’re still in Birchbrook.’
‘You don’t think I’m a loser for staying?’ I asked her quietly.
‘No. When I thought about you, I pictured you still here. I was surprised when you walked in to Willow’s, I thought maybe you’d got married, moved away, had a family but… I was happy to see you.’ She smiled at me and my heart started to beat faster.
I exhaled to try to calm down and asked Holly the question that had been locked up inside my lips since walking into Willow’s kitchen and seeing her sat there. ‘Why did you stop contacting me?’