Chapter 27
HOLLY
Paul looked at me as we hovered over his bed.
He kept checking that I wanted what was happening between us.
My body was screaming yes. His kisses had been making me feel more turned on than I had been in years.
I knew if I thought about this too much, my overthinking would pull something up to stop me.
Yes, I knew that once we did this, there would be no going back.
And I had no idea how I would feel afterwards.
But I had run from so much for so long. I was sick of it.
I was tired. I didn’t want to second-guess everything right now.
I wanted Paul’s lips on mine and his hands on me and to sink into his bed and ignore the world with him.
‘I think I should definitely see if this is as cosy as it looks,’ I said back to him.
He grinned and laid me gently down on top of the bed, watching as my body sank into the covers.
It was a large king-size wooden frame and took up a lot of the bedroom, with a navy duvet and pillows, as well as grey cushions on top and a grey throw blanket on the end.
It smelled of his musky scent and my nerves faded away as I looked up at the man who had been my best friend.
I knew I was safe here with him. While we stayed in this room, we were in a bubble that no one could pop, just the two of us together.
‘Well?’ Paul asked gruffly, his eyes drinking in my body greedily. He looked so good with his beard gone and just a line of light stubble. Younger and more handsome than ever. It made his eyes pop too.
‘It’s really comfortable but you need to get onto the bed with me,’ I said, eager to have his arms back around me. He had felt so strong and warm. That’s why I’d called his place cosy like him. They both made me feel strangely right at home.
Paul climbed onto the bed and leaned over me. I reached up and tugged off his beanie, then I ran my hand through his hair. ‘Have you cut it?’ I asked as it looked shorter and tidier than the glimpses I’d caught whenever he took off his beanie. And it felt so much softer than I’d expected too.
‘I had a little trim, yeah,’ he replied, his tone husky and sexy.
‘I like it,’ I told him, earning myself a pleased smile. I couldn’t help but wonder if his makeover had been for my benefit. I hoped so. I thought he was the most handsome I’d ever seen him look.
Paul leaned down and kissed me, moving his hand down to cup my neck as his tongue found mine, caressing me so deeply, my body arched up off the bed.
Then he dipped his lips down to my collarbone, kissing along the edge of my jumper before slipping his fingers underneath it.
I gasped as he brushed over my bra, my nipples hardening instantly.
‘Hols, tell me how far you want to go,’ he said then, stopping and looking down at me seriously. ‘Because I want to take all your clothes off but I can stop or go slower or—’
‘Take them all off,’ I interrupted. I had thought about this moment a lot when we were younger and tried not to think about it when I was alone at night, but ever since we kissed, my mind had gone out of control wondering how it would feel to be in bed with my old friend.
So far it felt hot and right and comfortable but I needed more.
Paul did as I asked. He was still a man of few words but they were so often just the right ones. He pulled my jumper off then reached for my jeans, unbuttoning them and slipping them off deftly.
‘You’re a dream come true,’ he murmured, taking in my underwear.
He kissed me along the edge of my bra, slipping one cup down to kiss my bare breast, licking over my nipple and making me shiver.
He reached behind me and I arched again to let him take my bra off.
I could feel how hard he was inside his jeans and I wanted to touch him.
I let out an impatient noise. ‘What?’ he asked as he stroked my breasts, making me ache to feel his touch everywhere.
‘You have all your clothes on still.’
‘That’s right. Be patient,’ he said with a gruffness that made me squirm beneath him.
His kisses trailed down my body until he reached the edge of my underwear, hooking his fingers underneath and pulling them gently down before tossing them on the floor.
Then he slowly ran a hand up my leg from my foot to my inner thigh.
‘So soft,’ he whispered as he caressed me there.
My lips parted as the ache inside me built further.
‘Please,’ I pleaded with him. It had been a long time since I’d been touched, and I wanted him to do it so badly.
Paul’s lips covered mine as he stroked me, making me sigh into his mouth as finally his fingertips touched right where I needed them the most. He left my lips to move down and flick one of my nipples into his mouth.
He was better at this than I could have hoped for.
My legs trembled with anticipation as he slid a finger inside me.
A moan of pleasure escaped me and he let out a contented murmur.
I quickly found myself teetering on the edge when Paul suddenly stopped.
‘Be patient, I guess?’ I asked, my body missing him instantly.
‘That’s right,’ he replied.
I watched as he climbed off me and stood by the bed.
He undid his shirt and tossed it aside, his eyes still on me.
I looked at his muscular chest and then my eyes slid lower as he undid his jeans and pulled them down.
I hadn’t been wrong about feeling him straining inside them.
He slid his boxers straight down too and he smirked at the expression on my face.
Paul was a big guy… all over, it now was clear.
‘Stand up, Hols,’ he instructed.
I didn’t miss a beat. I quickly climbed off the bed and stood next to him. He took my hand and moved it onto him. We both gasped at the contact, our eyes still locked. He felt perfect in my hand as I started to stroke him.
‘I want you so much,’ I confessed, thinking about what he was going to feel like.
‘Me too, sweetheart,’ he replied, my heart swelling at how affectionately he said it. I felt so connected to him, I wasn’t at all nervous. He spun me around and kissed my neck as he reached for me again.
I moved my legs apart, leaned back against him and closed my eyes as he found me again.
He seemed to know exactly where I needed to feel his touch, like how well he knew me outside the bedroom.
I wanted to make him feel as good as he was making me feel.
So, I reached behind and touched him and was rewarded with a moan.
‘Do you think you can come with me inside you?’ he asked breathlessly and my legs trembled again.
I nodded eagerly. I was already close and couldn’t wait any longer.
‘That’s my girl,’ he purred.
My whole body lit up at those words. I’d waited so long to go to bed with Paul that I wanted it to last forever but my body was also desperate for release. I was more turned on that I’d been in my life.
Paul grabbed a condom from the table beside us then he handed it to me. ‘Please put it on me, Hols,’ he begged, sounding equally desperate as me.
My body tingled with anticipation as he sank onto the edge of the bed and I leaned down to slip the condom on him slowly, enjoying the way his breath hitched at my touch.
‘I want you back on my lap,’ he said, looking up at me with fire in his eyes. ‘We couldn’t do this down there but here, we can.’
‘Hmm,’ I said, thinking about how much I’d wanted to in the café. I sat astride him and eased myself down onto him.
‘That’s it,’ Paul gasped when he slid inside me.
I wrapped my arms around him as he clutched my waist, our lips finding one another again as I moved up and down on top of him.
‘You feel incredible,’ he said, leaning back to brush my hair from my face again.
This time, he pulled it into a ponytail with his hands, smiling when I let out a moan.
‘So do you,’ I gasped as pleasure ran through me.
‘That’s it, move exactly how you want it,’ Paul whispered into my ear as I clutched him harder, moving faster on top of him. He let out his own moan when I moved my hips.
‘You like that?’
‘I love it,’ he replied, his grip on my waist stronger as he lifted his hips to meet me thrust for thrust.
My body heated up we moved faster together, pleasure pooling inside me, desperate to be let out.
I gasped as I tipped over the edge, hitting my peak faster than I was expecting.
I was soon shuddering against him, crying out his name with abandon.
As I clung to his shoulders while my body throbbed with delicious vibrations, Paul lifted up on the bed, pumping into me a few more times before he cried out with release too.
Then he found my lips, moaning as he kissed me and trembled beneath me.
‘God, Hols,’ he breathed then, pulling back to look at me in wonder.
He reached up to sweep my tousled hair off of my face then lifted me gently down onto the bed.
He tossed the condom aside and laid down beside me, wrapping his arms around my slick, satisfied body.
I rolled into him, curling into his nook as we panted in time, our heart thumping fast inside our chests.
‘I know,’ I agreed, feeling incoherent after the way he’d made me feel. ‘Why did we wait so long to do that?’
Paul chuckled against me and kissed the top of my head. ‘It was worth the wait, that’s all I can say.’
‘I don’t want to move.’
‘Don’t,’ he replied huskily. ‘Stay here and relax,’ he added, smiling as he held me closer and tighter. ‘You feel like home,’ he added, his voice barely audible.
My whole body tensed for a second at those words until I forced myself to relax again into his embrace.
I wanted to say it back but I was too scared to.
That had been the best sex of my life with the man I’d known the longest. And we had felt like the perfect fit.
Now afterwards, we still felt that way draped over each other, entwined like a knot.
I was unsure where I started and he ended. It was terrifying.
I wanted to stay here forever, and also to run away and never come back.