Chapter Forty-Three
Iris
The awful dryness and chemical taste in my mouth awaken me.
“Ahh!” I moan at the bright lights that attack my eyes. I shut them back with a wince.
“Rainbow, what do you need?”
“The blinds,” I mutter to Kian. Once the light has vanished, I flutter my lids open. The sterile room comes into focus, reality crashing in on its heels. Kian’s words rise to the forefront like a blow to my chest.
“There’s a very low chance of you getting pregnant.”
“I’m sorry.”
I pray I hallucinated it all, but when I twist my head to Kian, sitting beside me with the saddest and most worrisome expression, my hope gets squashed into ashes.
The twisted anguish I felt last night is replaced by coldness, chilling my bones.
I’m not going to be a mother.
No kids of my own.
That’s my punishment. I bite back tears as they sting my eyes.
“Iris?”
I blink rapidly, bringing Kian’s ragged face into focus. In broad daylight, I notice every little detail about him that I missed yesterday.
He looks like he’s aged so much in a week. There are dark bags underneath his eyes, his cheeks sunken and dull, and unkempt stubble covering his square jaw. The light gray color of his eyes has lost their stormy depths, replaced by depressing shadows.
Dragging my gaze lower, it hurts to see that he’s lost a lot of weight. Though he’s still broad and huge like a Viking. Yet, my wolf looks broken and beaten down.
He’s been battling alone, worried sick about me.
I imagine myself in his place, and it causes my insides to ripple in stabbing pain. While my heart is constricting like someone is slicing it into pieces.
Kian rubs my arm, lacing his fingers through mine. “Baby, what I told you─”
“I don’t want to talk about it,” I shut him down. The angular lines of his face tighten. I shrug. “I was wrong. We can’t have it all.”
“That’s not true,” Kian argues.
“We’re the living proof of it.”
“Iris…”
“Water, please.” He sighs, but listens. Leaning over, he grabs me water in a cup and holds the straw to my lips. I drink it down, letting it fix my thirstiness. Once he puts it away, I cup his wrist. “Lie with me?”
Without another word, he climbs in behind me and gently pushes his arm underneath my head. I intertwine my fingers with his where his hand is resting on my stomach and close my eyes again, drifting to sleep.
The one place where the cold and hard reality can’t touch me.
***
My best friends sit on either side of my bed the next day after my parents go home.
Kian stands outside the door to give us some privacy.
He hasn’t left my side, nor have I asked him to, other than to order him to go home and change.
Pretty sure he switched his clothes somewhere in the hospital because he was back within half an hour.
“You gave us all a death scare, Iris,” says Bianca. “We came running as soon as we heard you were awake.”
“We missed you,” whispers Rosalie, gaze shimmery. “We’re so glad you’re okay.”
I’m not okay.
“I’m sorry for getting both of you caught up in my mess,” I softly say. “Were you hurt?”
“Why are you sorry?” Rosalie replies with a tilt of her head. “It wasn’t your fault. Don’t you dare blame yourself.”
“I shouldn’t have let her in.”
Bianca leans forward. “You were trying to help, babe.”
“We’re all safe now,” Rosalie reminds me. “Don’t think about what-ifs. None of us could’ve predicted what was going to happen.”
If only it were that easy. “Kian mentioned you both spoke to the police.”
They wanted to come to take my statement, but Kian firmly refused.
“Yeah, we did,” Bianca answers.
“Yukta spilled the beans herself. Plus, the gun had both her and Arjun’s fingerprints. She’s spending the rest of her life behind bars.”
It’s so shocking how Yukta fell for Arjun’s lies. Then again, we all did. He was a monster hiding in plain sight.
“Is Arjun really dead?” I ask.
They share a look before Rosalie answers, “He died in a prison fight.”
Heavy silence hangs because the three of us know that isn’t true.
“He’s exactly where he belongs,” Bianca says darkly. “Don’t waste your energy thinking about him.”
“You’re right.”
“When are you going to be discharged?”
“In a few days, after my stitches are removed.” I gingerly rub a hand over the bandages on my chest and abdomen. The meds make me lightheaded, tricking my body into thinking it’s fine. But if I move or shift just a little, acute pain shoots up my spine.
The white walls constantly remind me of why I landed in here, followed by the flashes of hearing the news of my… I shove it down.
“I heard from Dash that Kian is selling the apartment.”
“I didn’t know.”
Rosalie strokes my palm. “I think it’s the right call.”
That place is where our story began, holding so many beautiful moments, filled with mischief and affection. In a split second, one tragedy has outweighed all the good times, turning it haunted.
The girls stay a little while longer before pushing to their feet. Bending, they kiss my temple and whisper how much they love me before exiting my room.
Kian steps inside, coming up to my side. Brushing his lips over mine in a soft kiss, he sits down.
“You didn’t tell me you’re selling your place,” I mention.
Steely gaze locks on mine. “It’s not a decision open for negotiation.”
“Where will we go once I’m discharged?”
“Somewhere you’re going to love.” Caressing my head, he tenderly urges, “Rest now. I’ll be here when you wake up.”
“You didn’t go home.”
“I am right where I want and need to be, Rainbow.”
You’re my home .
I read it in his soulful eyes.
As much as I try to stay awake, fatigue weighs me down, and I fall into a slumber. Unlike the past few days, it isn’t dreamless.
Kian is with me.