Thirty-four
Logan
One week. That’s all we had left to wait until Blake could come out of hiding and we’d be able to trick people into believing he’s been away in New York the whole time. His legs were getting better and he was walking more each day, but of course something had to blow our whole plan up.
I thought I’d finally get to stop hiding him from my mom and take him out on real dates we haven’t had a chance to have yet, but I’m not sure how any of that will happen now.
I barge through the front door, slamming it hard behind me, and Blake appears from my room minutes later as I’m pacing behind the couch.
“What’s happening?” He walks closer, leaning against the couch.
“Turn on the news. Channel twenty?seven,” I grind out, gesturing to the remote only inches away from him.
He grabs it from the end table, hand shaking as he hits the power button and flips through the channels.
I sit with him on the couch as he’s increasing the volume, and all the color leaves his face when his abandoned car shows up on the screen.
Yellow tape is wrapped between it and a news reporter as cops are gathering evidence.
“They were talking about it at work today,” I say, eyes glued to him while his stay on the screen.
“What does this mean?” He drops the remote between us, and I hold his hand to help him keep it steady.
“I don’t know. We don’t have as many options now. You can keep staying hidden or I can turn myself in.”
His expression’s like stone and he still doesn’t look at me. “I . . . if you turn yourself in, then that means you’ll go to jail and . . . and . . . I can’t come with you.”
“Yeah.” I swallow down the uneasiness threatening to come up. “But maybe the sentence will only be for a few years, and then when I’m out—”
“Or maybe we say I staged the whole thing to get away from my abusive home. No, we don’t have as many options now, but we still have ones better than that.”
The lady on the news goes on to talk about a missing persons report being filed, and she asks for anyone who might have news on where Blake could be to come forward. He bites his lip, pulling his hand away from me.
“You don’t want me anymore, do you? Is that what this is?” His eyes water as he looks at me, and I’m too tongue tied to answer right away.
“Well . . . is it? You’ve grown tired of me? It was only a matter of time before you did.” He looks down at his lap, breaths growing shallow, and I take his hand again, scooting closer to him.
“That’s not it at all, piglet. That’s not even close to the truth. Has it felt like I don’t want you anymore?” I tug on his chin with my other hand.
His head slowly moves from side to side. “No.”
“Then you need to trust that feeling over all the bad thoughts trying to confuse you. I know people have made you feel like you weren’t good enough before, but you are, Blake. You are more than enough.”
“Then why would leaving me be your first thought? It should never have been if that’s the case.”
I rub his fingers between mine, stroking strands of hair behind his ear. “It wasn’t. You only heard it that way. But do you really want to be stuck in here forever? Always trapped in a house with the same person for the rest of your life?”
“I’m okay with that as long as the person is you.”
My heart does something weird in my chest and I kiss the corner of his mouth. “Maybe it’ll have to come to that, but maybe it won’t. We’ll figure it out either way.”
“We’ve been figuring it out so far,” he says, sounding more positive than before.
“We have.” I move to kiss him properly this time, freezing when someone bangs on the door.
“I know you’re in there, you little shit. Hayden told me what you did and I saw the bruises.”
I look back at the door and then Blake, placing my finger in front of my mouth, and his chest moves at a rapid pace.
We stay quiet, and right when I think my dad isn’t going to keep hanging around, he bangs again.
“I know you can hear me. If you don’t get out here, I’ll find a way to come in.
After all, this is still my fucking house. ”
Blake looks to the room and I nod, gesturing for him to lock himself in there.
He looks unsure at first, but when the door shakes again, he jumps up, making a beeline for the partly open door.
I get to my feet as soon as I hear the lock click and turn the TV off, standing by the window and watching my dad as he talks to himself on my porch.
“Logan?” he says, looking right at me through the small gap between the curtain and window. “Is that you? There’s no need to drag this out any more than you already have.”
“Leave, or I’ll call and say you’re tresspassing.”
“On my land?”
“Mom has put a restraining order on you, and you aren’t supposed to be anywhere she might be. And this is her land too.”
“She isn’t home, so that shouldn’t matter.”
“She lives here and her name is on the deed. So get back in your truck or else I’ll make that call.”
“You’re up to something in there, aren’t you? Why is the barn still locked? What are you hiding?”
“What is this really about? Why are you here? It doesn’t sound like it’s because of Hayden anymore.”
“So I’m right, aren’t I?”
“I’m going to count to ten, and I swear if you don’t get your ass back in that truck, I’m—”
“You’re going to what? Hit me and drag me there yourself? Or are you going to go after Hayden again?” His tone is spiteful.
I huff a laugh. “I haven’t seen Hayden in weeks. I have way better things to do than waste my time on him.”
“You’re lying. It’s all you do is lie. You lied about me to your mom and you lied about Hayden making those flyers. He said you made them for attention and you hacked his account. I’ll believe him over you any day.”
“And that’s part of the problem, isn’t it Tyler.”
“I’ll be back,” he says, slapping his fist on one of the shutters.
“I’m going to find out what shady shit you’ve been doing while you’re out here by yourself.
Don’t think I won’t. I heard your mom doesn’t even live here anymore, and soon neither will you.
” His words hang in the air as he turns around, stumbling to his truck.
He’s drunk. Go figure. I reach for my phone, contacting a buddy who works with me at the station, and he answers on the second ring.
“Hey, man. What’s up? Your dad harassing your mom again?”
“He stopped by the house just now looking for her,” I lie. “And he’s drunk off his ass too. Got in his truck and drove off like that.”
“Damn.”
“Yeah. You out patrolling today? Thought maybe you could watch out for a red Ford pickup. He’s probably heading to BJs to drink some more.”
“Yeah, I gotchu.” No one hates people drinking and driving more than Hector. “Text me his plate numbers so I can make sure it’s him, and I’ll let you know if I see anything.”
“Will do. Thanks, man.”
“Sure thing. Enjoy your weekend off. Go have fun for once. Ever since you graduated from the academy you’ve been working your ass off.”
I let out a short laugh. “I’ll try.”
I end the call and send over the information he needs. The bedroom door snicks open and Blake peeks his head out.
“It’s fine for you to come out now, piglet.”
“You think he’ll be back?”
“Maybe. He might be getting his second DWUI, though, so maybe not.”
He steps closer, pressing a hand to his hip. “So we have to think of something fast, just in case.”
“You mean something other than you staying hidden forever?”
He rubs down to the center of his leg, wincing. “It sounded good at the time, but now I’m not so sure.”
“We said we’d figure it out and we will.” I close the distance between us, following his rubbing fingers with my eyes. “Is your leg bothering you? Should I call Reese?”
“It’s just aching from the cold. I’m fine.”
“You sure? How about you sit down and I get the heating pad?”
“I told you I’m okay.”
I cast my eyes down at him in warning and he laughs. “Okay, okay. I’m going. But don’t worry, I’ll be fine in an hour or so. I always am.”
“It doesn’t hurt to try to make you feel better quicker than that, does it?”
“No, and it doesn’t hurt me to do nothing while you take care of me either.”
I kiss his cheek, helping him lower himself to the couch. “And as long as that’s true, I’ll keep doing it.”
“And the only way you can is if we find a way for you to keep staying with me.”
He’s right, and I can’t do either if I’m in jail. We’ll figure it out. We didn’t come this far not to.
My dad’s been pulled over for driving drunk again after swerving into the wrong lane and almost running someone off the highway. Hector calls me an hour after taking him to the station, and I hold Blake tighter as he pushes back against me, burying his face in his pillow with his eyes closed.
“Thanks for letting me know,” I say quietly into the phone.
“Sure thing, man. He’s calling somoene to bail him out he says but this could mean more jail time served later down the road and he’ll probably land back here a third time before his court date too.”
“Good. Let’s hope so.”
“Yeah, I’m sure you and your mom could use a long break from the asshole and I hope this means he’ll be leaving you alone for a while since It’ll only look worse on him if he keeps going against the restraining order.”
“Yeah. All his shit is starting to catch up to him and I think it’s finally making him back off some.
” Restraining orders can only do so much, but I can always count on good ol’ dad to fuck up in other ways.
He’s giving me more to work with right now than Hayden is, and based on the shit he’s been saying around town lately, Hayden’s about to become an even bigger problem.
He probably won’t like that my dad won’t have extra money to support his lavish lifestyle anymore either.
Not when it’s all going to DWI charges. His own father cut his ass off after his uncle fired him for drinking on the job, and he now wants absolutely nothing to do with him after seeing pictures of Hayden kissing my dad plastered all over his store window.
He blames me for it, and I wish I could say it was me but I’m not the only person he’s pissed off around town.
He keeps starting fights with my friends at bars, and tried to spread false allegations about Jimmy because he was mad Jimmy was promoted after he was fired. He’s about to be more insufferable. I just know it.
“Good. My mom was in the same position once, so I know what a shitshow it can be.”
“Yeah, thanks again for keeping me updated.”
“Sure, man. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Later.” I hang up the phone and Blake startles awake when I sit up in bed.
“Going somewhere?” He rubs his eyes, lifting himself up on his elbows.
“Just to feed the animals. Sleep okay?”
He nods, yawning. “What was that all about?” He gestures to the phone in my lap.
“It was my friend Hector from work. He pulled my dad over for driving drunk again.”
He sits up higher. “So that means he won’t be coming by anymore, then?”
“Hopefully not for a while at least. It will look worse on him in court if he does.” I move the blanket down my legs and he covers me back up, sliding closer.
“I feel like that calls for a celebration.” He runs his fingers down my hip and traces the seam of my underwear leading to my groin.
“We might be celebrating too soon with my luck.”
“You think you have bad luck?”
I tilt my hand from side to side. “About fifty?fifty. My dad, Hayden, your car being found is one half, and you’re the other.”
“So I’m on the good side?”
“Yes.” I cup a hand around the back of his neck, pulling him in for a chaste kiss.
“I wasn’t always . . . was I?”
“No, but luck has a way of changing.”
“Exactly,” he says pointedly. “And if I have that potential, then so does everything else.”
“Yeah. I guess it does.”
“It’s already starting to with your dad. I’m sure Hayden will get his too.”
“Yeah, I’m kind of losing hope with that one. He’s spreading all kinds of lies about me lately, and when he finds out my dad has no more money left to give, he’ll only get worse.”
“You don’t know that yet. He could do something that’ll have him arrested too soon based off the track record he’s had lately.” Something darkens in his eyes.
“He could, but he somehow always manages to get out of it.”
He looks ahead, flexing his toes out of the blanket.
“He has so far, you mean.” When he looks at me again, his smile holds something sinister in it.
He’s talking as if he knows something I don’t, but I’m probably just reading into things.
I have to be. He’s been more hopeful lately and that’s probably all this is.
“Yeah. I should get to those chores,” I say before my mind can run too far ahead of me.
We have been moving away from the dark lately, but out of nowhere a terrible feeling comes over me as he yanks at my arm when I try to leave the bed again.
A feeling that tells me I might have mistaken it for moving away, when we were really only taking a small break.