Chapter 19 #2
“You alright?” I asked her as we pulled into the garage.
She nodded. “Yeah. I think I’m okay.”
“Come on. Let me get you out so we can go inside.”
I was on the other side in a flash, pulling Lyric’s door open and helping her out of the car. Instinctively, my arms went around her body, pulling her close and holding onto her as if she’d vanish.
She’s mine.
All mine.
“I love you,” I reminded her.
“I love you,” she wept in my arms.
“I’m gonna take good care of you, baby. I’m gonna make sure you’re alright.”
“I know.”
I kissed her lips once.
Twice.
And then a final time before taking her by the hand. I led her into our home where she halted by the garage door. One hand went across her chest. The other went on her forehead. Then, it fell to her mouth.
“What is it?”
Tears cascade down her cheeks. She was an emotional wreck. It didn’t matter. I was ready to wipe those tears and remind her that we were in this together.
“I just– I feel weakened, yet so free. Liberated. I–I just… I’ve been waiting for this moment for so long.”
“Don’t cry.”
I thumbed her tears away.
“Are you hungry?”
She shook her head.
“You have to eat, baby.”
“I don’t have an appetite.”
“How about we at least share a plate. If you love it enough, I can make us a second one. Sounds doable?”
“Yes. But, can I shower first?”
“Yeah. Yeah. Then, I’ll whip us up something quick.”
“Okay.”
***
I watched as Lyric twirled around the kitchen. She was so different from the woman who had walked through the garage door two weeks ago. Still, she was healing, but she was in better spirits.
It was Sunday and we were scheduled to be at Luca’s for dinner tonight. However, Lyric wasn’t ready to escape the bubble we’d been in for the last two weeks. I called to let her parents and her brothers know. It felt good being open and honest with them about what was going on in our world.
With the spoon up to her mouth, she whipped her head from one direction to the other. She’d traded her silk pajama pieces for an oversized tee of mine. Still, she was beautiful.
“And your… KISS.”
She ran the distance, eliminating the space between us. Her lips pressed against mine before she backed away, continuing to entertain me as I seared the chicken on each side.
Since she’d gotten from the hospital, she hadn’t lifted a finger. I made her a fresh meal every night. I washed her body every day. I helped her into her clothes. And I kept her skin moisturized. Not because she still needed me to, but because it was my pleasure.
Breathlessly, she stared at me as the song ended. I couldn’t help but laugh. Her inner child was revealing herself, which let me know a few things.
She felt safe.
She felt secure.
She felt loved.
She felt good.
I wasn’t sure what emotions the night would bring as we laid in bed together, but that didn’t matter right now.
“You tired yet?”
She nodded, attempting to catch her breath.
“Good. Sit down at the table. The food is ready.”
She complied, grabbing her wine and taking off toward the table.
Somehow, she felt so far away. I platted both pieces of chicken and used the liquid in the pan to top it off.
It accompanied broccoli mash and baked macaroni.
Per Lyric’s request, I tossed in some cornbread.
It had been a minute since she’d last had some.
Two glasses of water later and I was headed toward her, hands full and heart fuller. We’d lost our child, but we’d gained something that was indescribable.
Freedom.
Lyric stood to help. She grabbed both plates, allowing me to sit both glasses of water down. As she did the same with the plates, I took my seat. With a wide smile, she stared at me.
“It smells and looks good.”
“I hope you like it,” I admitted. “Give me your hand.”
She intertwined our fingers and bowed her head. So did I.
“Father God, thank you for strengthening us during this time. Thank you for keeping us safe and keeping us sane. Lord, bless this food and bless my family. Bless the woman who will be my wife and bless the womb that will bear my children. We have the faith, Lord. We will handle our fruit with care. We are ready to harvest. We are ready to have everything You promised. Amen.”
When I opened my eyes, Lyric was staring at me with tears in hers.
I chuckled, “You know– I’m beginning to realize you’re just a ball of mush.”
She slapped my arm. “Shut up.”
“I love it, though. I love you.”
“You have no other choice.” She reminded me.
“I had a choice. I chose.”
“Wisely, huh?”
I agreed. “Very. Now I get to watch you cry fifteen times a week.”
“I’m just a girl,” she laughed, wiping her tears.
“You’re my girl.”
Within two hours of eating, Lyric was fast asleep. From the opposite corner of our bedroom, I watched her. The moon’s glow made her skin glisten.
My sleeping beauty.
There was nowhere else in the world I’d rather be. And I couldn’t help but chastise myself for taking so long to get here. I’d known I loved Lyric for a long time. I’d also known that distance did nothing but intensify my yearning. Still, I stayed away. Hoping, praying it would suffice. It didn’t.
Because when real love is the reason, there will never be enough miles between two hearts to keep them at bay. Our desires kept our hearts and heads free of the noise. It didn’t matter who she was loving or who I was fucking, we always knew where we belonged.
I knew I’d break the face of every motherfucker that broke her heart, so I stayed away to stay my Black ass out of jail.
But, I still ended up hugging them bars and strangely that became the source of Lyric’s audacity.
I’d never forget the letter she’d written to me. The words looped in my head daily.
Bzzt.
My cell vibrated, startling me slightly. I dug into my pants to retrieve it. I wasn’t surprised to see Luca’s name on the screen.
My legs began moving toward the door as I swiped the screen. When I finally put the phone up to my ear, I was just outside of our bedroom where my angel was sleeping.
“Yeah?”
“How is she?”
“Getting better,” I informed him.
“Good. Good. How is she feeling?”
“Emotional. Every day.”
“You need us to take her off your hands for a day or so?”
I shook my head as if he could see me.
“Nah. She’s right where she needs to be. She’s safe here. She can be as sad as she wants. As happy as she wants. As confused as she wants. As difficult as she wants. I don’t need a break from Lyric, Luca. I never will.”
There was a brief silence.
“I know.”
There was an even longer pause before Luca spoke again.
“Forgive me–forgive me for making this shit about my feelings back at the hospital. It ain’t.”
“You had every right. It was expected. I respect it.”
“You’re family.”
“You ain’t got to tell me what I already know, nigga.”
A chuckle lightened the conversation.
“Aight. Take care of my sister. If you need us, we’re here.”
“Always.”
I ended the call, inhaling as deeply as I’d exhaled. All was well in my world.