Chapter Eighteen
“Mommy, they have a Ferris wheel!” Emily yells, her eyes wide as she takes in all the lights.
“They do. You want to ride it?” I ask her.
“I do. Can we?”
I look over to Mac. He is beaming down at Emily. “I bought us wristbands so we could ride all the rides you want.”
“Yay! You’re the best, Mac.” She throws herself at his legs.
“Do you want to go too?” Mac asks Tanner.
He shakes his head.
“Is there anything else you want to do?” I ask him.
He shrugs.
“How about you take Emily, and I will walk around with Tanner until he finds something he likes?” I tell Mac.
“Are you sure? We can stay together and still do something they both like.”
I smile, nodding my head to Tanner. Then I mouth, “I want to talk to him.”
He nods. “Keep your phone on you and call me if you need anything. A few of the guys are here tonight too, so it should be safe.”
I nod, wrapping my arm around Tanner. He shrugs me off but stays close.
I watch as Mac picks Emily up, carrying her toward the Ferris wheel.
“What’s going on with you tonight?” I ask gently.
“It’s nothing.” He turns his head away.
“How about this? I will get you a funnel cake, any one you want, and then you can tell me about it.”
He thinks about it before he nods.
We head over to the funnel cake truck. I smile when he orders the one with the most sugar and fried Oreos. After I pay, I lead him toward a picnic table.
Once we sit, I steal a piece of his funnel cake.
“Hey. Mom, you said it was mine.”
I give him a look. “If you talked. I don’t hear words coming from your mouth.”
He sighs. “They are doing a career day at school. Most of the kids have their parents coming.”
“Oh. I can come. Tell me when.”
He shakes his head. “All my friends have their dads coming. They asked about mine, and I didn’t know what to say.”
My heart jumps in my chest. Even thousands of miles away, Evan is still hurting my boy, and there’s nothing I can do to make it better.
“I’m sorry, honey. I know it’s hard not being able to talk about him, but it’s for the best. We don’t want him finding us.”
“That’s not the problem. I said something I shouldn’t have, and now they are going to make fun of me.” He grumbles, looking down at his funnel cake without eating it.
“What did you say?” I ask him.
“I told them Mac was my dad. They think I am really cool, but Mac isn’t going to come to school. He won’t pretend to be my dad. I wish he were, though. He is way better than the real thing.”
I suck in a breath. I like that he likes Mac, but I can see what he means. We can’t ask Mac to play the role. The truth is, as much as Mac might like us, the kids are not his responsibility.
“How about we tell them he couldn’t make it and I come instead?” I offer.
He shrugs. “I guess.”
I hate how upset he is. I wish we weren’t here, that we didn’t have to do this. That his father wasn’t an abusive piece of shit who never cared about any of us.
Reaching out, I grab his hand.
“It will all be okay. I promise.”
He continues to eat in silence. Picking up my phone, I text Mac.
Me: Let’s switch. I think Tanner needs guy time.
Mac: Can do. Emily wants to go to the craft tent anyway. Where are you?
Me: Funnel cake.
He doesn’t respond, but minutes later, he is walking up with Emily in his arms.
“Mommy, they are making bracelets. Can we go?”
I smile. “Of course. Sit with your brother a minute. Tanner, will you share?”
He nods, not looking up as I pull Mac aside.
“What’s wrong?” he asks.
“I guess some kids at school are having their dads come in for career day. It has him pretty down.”
“I’ll go,” Mac says without hesitation. “I mean, I’m not his dad, but I can be that figure for him if it’s what he needs. I’m going. It’s done. Let me talk to him.”
I blink a few times at how sure he is of this.
“They aren’t your responsibility,” I tell him.
“No, they aren’t, but I want them to be. You too. So let me do this. I’ll take him over to the GellyBall area and have a little guy time. I won’t tell him you said anything. I’ll get him to talk to me about it, and then I will offer.”
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” I ask.
He leans in, pressing a quick kiss to my lips. “Trust me. I have their and your best interests in mind always. Let me do this for him.”
My eyes start to water, so I nod.
“Okay. You’ll find us in the big red barn doing crafts.”
He nods, walking back to the kids. I follow him.
“How about we play GellyBall?” he asks Tanner.
Tanner perks up. “What’s that?”
“I’ll explain on the way. Grab your funnel cake.”
“Emily, let’s go,” I tell her.
It’s a quick walk to the red barn, where they hold crafts. I get Emily situated, then watch her make her bracelet.
“What a beautiful little girl,” a man says from behind me.
I turn, startled by it.
“Thank you,” I tell him, feeling uncomfortable.
“She almost looks familiar, like a daughter of a friend. What’s her name?”
“I am not comfortable giving out my child’s personal information. Please move on,” I tell him.
“Mommy, look,” she says, holding up her bracelet.
“It’s beautiful. We should go find Mac now,” I tell her.
The man moves a little away, but his eyes are still on us. I don’t like it. We are several steps away when someone yells out Emily’s name.
“Mrs. Stephenson!” Emily yells, running toward her teacher.
My eyes aren’t on them, though. They are on the man who is studying us. I swallow hard, moving toward Mrs. Stephenson.
“Sorry, I was distracted. How are you?” I ask her, my eyes staying on the man as he slips out of the barn.
“Good. Emily is doing wonderfully in class. She is a joy.”
I force a smile. “That’s great to hear. I hate to be rude, but we are meeting someone, and they are already waiting.”
She smiles. “Of course. See you Monday.”
“Bye.” Emily waves, placing her hand in mine.
Then I speed walk us over to the GellyBall area. The boys are still playing, so we sit and wait as I keep looking for the unfamiliar man.
When Mac and Tanner walk up to us laughing, I finally relax.
“What’s wrong?” Mac whispers as I step into his arms for a hug.
“Creepy guy. I’m better with you. Let’s not separate anymore,” I tell him.
He nods. “I’ve got you.”
Those three words mean the world to me. More than he could even know.
The ride back from the fair is one filled with Emily’s adorable chatter. I love listening to her go on and on about whatever is in her head.
Tanner isn’t as chatty, but he has a smile on his face as he listens to his sister too.
Our GellyBall bonding went well. Not only did he come out and admit that he told his friends I was his dad, but he was over the moon when I told him I would be happy to go to the event with him. I told him he could tell them whatever he wanted, that I would be what he needed.
He didn’t say the words, but I think he wishes I were really his dad. As soon as Jane agrees, I’ll be adopting them for real. Well, after I take care of the situation that is currently preventing it.
“Mac, will you go trick-or-treating with us? Mommy says we can go this year,” Emily asks.
I look over to Jane. “If it’s okay with you.”
She reaches over, grabbing my hand with hers. “I would feel better with you there.”
I smile, but in the back of my head, I wonder about the creepy guy she mentioned earlier. I haven’t had a chance to ask more questions, and Fox hasn’t been able to pull up any footage from the barn of it.
“Of course. What are you going as?” I ask Emily.
“I’m going to be Moana, and Tanner’s going to be Darth something.” She frowns.
“Darth Vader?” I ask, trying not to laugh.
“Yeah, that.” She nods.
“Is Mommy dressing up?”
She shrugs. “I don’t know, but you should. So will you go with me?”
I laugh. “Absolutely. I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”
Her eyes beam. “Really? You want to go with us?”
“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
“You spoil her,” Jane whispers.
I kiss the back of her hand. “I have some years to make up for.”
When we finally pull up in my driveway, I help Emily out before following Tanner and Jane into their house.
“Go get ready for bed,” she tells them.
As they rush off, she grabs my cut and pulls me closer to her.
“Will you wait until I have them in bed?” she asks.
“Without question,” I say as I press a kiss to her temple.
Her eyes fall closed before she steps back. Then she disappears down the hall. I make myself comfortable on the couch, waiting for her to come back. It’s about an hour before she finally sits on the couch next to me, rubbing her feet.
“Here, let me do that.”
I grab them from her and start to massage them.
“Oh, that feels good.”
She moans, making my cock twitch. I continue my ministrations, watching her reactions. When she finally pulls them away, she looks sleepy.
“I should let you sleep,” I tell her.
She shakes her head. “No, I want to tell you about the man I saw. I am sure it is nothing and I am being paranoid, but he said Emily looked familiar. He asked for her name. I didn’t give it to him, but her teacher did call out to her. I’m worried he might have heard.”
“I’ll handle it. You are safe.”
“You don’t even know who the guy is.” She scoffs.
“No, but my IT guy, Fox, has been combing the footage. If you give me a description, he can find him.”
“Oh. I didn’t know. You already have him doing that?”
“Of course. Your safety and the kids are my number one priority. Some guy made you uncomfortable, so we are going to find out who he is and what he wanted.” I grab her hand, stroking the back of it with my thumb.
“Okay. He was shorter than you, but taller than me. Dark brown hair. Looked to be in his forties, maybe? He was wearing glasses and a blue sweater. That’s all I remember.”
I pull out my phone and text it all to Fox, then I put my phone away.
“Done. Now focus on more pleasant things, like trick-or-treating. I was thinking that we could walk around here, but most places around here don’t really do much. The club hosts a trunk-or-treat down at the community center, though. We could go to that after.”
She smiles, leaning into my shoulder. “You are too good to us. That sounds lovely. How did it go with Tanner?”
“He is trying to fit in. It’s hard when he feels like he can’t talk about his father. I hope it’s okay, but I told him I would be whatever he needed. So if he wants them to think I’m his father, then that’s what I will do. It’s what he deserves.” I cup her cheek.
“He deserves a dad like you,” she agrees. “So does Emily.”
Leaning in closer, I whisper, “And you deserve a man like me.”
She licks her lips before she leans forward. Her lips touch mine softly at first, but then she presses harder. Without prompting her, she swings her leg over until she is straddling me. She fists my cut as she kisses me with abandon. Fuck if it isn’t hot letting her take control.
After a moment, my hands fall on her hips, squeezing them before I slide them to her ass. The pretty dress she wore tonight is flimsy underneath my hands. All I can feel is the heat of her skin. I want to feel more.
I don’t dare push, though. I don’t want to trigger her, so I let her set the pace.
She lets go of my cut, her hands smoothing over the leather.
“You like my cut, a mhuirnín?” I ask.
“Yes. At first, it made you scary-looking, but now I see it as a symbol of safety. What does that mean anyway?”
I look down to where her hands are.
“That’s our logo,” I tell her.
She shakes her head, laughing.
“No. That term you call me, a mhuirnín.”
I swallow hard. “My darling. It’s a term of endearment. My father called my mother it.”
She meets my eyes, her feelings shining without hesitation.
“I like that,” she whispers.
“Good. I like you,” I tell her, leaning forward to kiss her again.
She gives in easily, letting me take the lead in the kiss this time. I take my time tasting and teasing her with my tongue until she is writhing on my lap.
I know I will need to stop soon, but I’m too caught up in her. She’s addicting. I could spend an eternity tasting her lips.
When she begins to rock her hips against me, I nearly come in my pants.
It is so juvenile, yet the hottest thing I have ever experienced.
I let her continue to rub against me, my hands on her hips helping her grind harder.
The first moan into my mouth is like a shot to my heart.
I want to hear it again. I want to hear it without it being muffled.
One day I will have that, but for tonight, I need to keep her quiet.
I kiss her harder as she grinds against me, using me to get herself off. When she finally comes, her body tenses, her nails digging into my chest beneath my cut.
I hold her through her orgasm, kissing her softly as she comes down. When she finally collapses in my arms, I brush the hair out of her face before kissing her temple.
“That was…” she whispers.
“Amazing.”
She pulls back, her face flushed. “Embarrassing. I practically molested you.”
I laugh. “No, I wanted it as much as you did.”
I cup her face, kissing her once more.
“Gosh, why are you so perfect? I keep waiting for your flaws to show,” she says.
That only has me smiling wider.
“You want to know my flaws?”
She nods. “Please.”
“I forget to put the toilet seat down. I believe the toilet paper roll goes down the back, not the front. I don’t roll my toothpaste. I hate peanut butter. Should I keep going?”
She is giggling at this point.
“Those are all things I can live with. Now, if you say you like pineapple on pizza…”
I grimace. “Guilty as charged.”
She swats my chest. “Out with you. That’s the line.”
“Please forgive me for my transgression. I’ll never eat it again,” I promise her.
She shakes her head. “My expectations aren’t that high. Be good to me and my kids. Never raise your voice at us or harm us in any way. That’s all I can really ask for.”
I hate that she has such low expectations.
“A mhuirnín, I am going to blow those expectations out of the water. Don’t worry. Emily will have her bar set so high, barely any men will ever meet it by the time I’m done with her.”
“Thank you, Mac.”
“For what?”
“Caring for us.”
I more than care for them, but I feel like it is too soon for her to know the depth of my feelings.
“How could I not? You guys are pretty damn amazing.”
“You’re not so bad yourself.”
She yawns.
“You should get to bed. I’ll head home,” I tell her.
She sighs. “Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow?”
I kiss her. “I’ll be here to make breakfast first thing.”
“There you go, being perfect again.”
“Only for you.”