Maddox
BEFORE
“When you said you had a surprise, I was thinking more, ‘I found a stray cat’ or ‘I’m taking you to a topless bar.’ Not . . . this.”
“It’s our dream.”
Anna’s head slowly turns to me. “It’s a fucking nightmare, Madd.” Anna looks over the shop and yeah. Fine. It’s a shithole. A cheap shithole, but still a shithole.
And it’s my shithole.
Or ours, but my best friend looks like she’s about to bolt. Fair. It is rough looking. “You know I’m a huge advocate for crazy, but you do realize how insane this is?”
“I know.” The floor needs to be redone, the walls, the um . . . well, everything. Besides all the repairs and equipment. “There’s an apartment upstairs.” I nudge her. “It’s a studio, but I’d let you have the bed if you want to move in with me.”
“So I can listen to you bang your boyfriend? No, thanks.”
“I can bang him quietly.” She snorts. “Seriously, you always have a place upstairs if it gets too much at home.” She sighs.
I know talking about serious shit makes her itchy, but the problem is, Anna deals with a lot of serious shit she doesn’t talk about.
She keeps it inside and lets it fester like a wound.
She’s been my ride or die basically my entire life. I know how she deals with her problems. Or how she used to. Lately she’s switched out razor blades for tattoos. A release I can get behind. After I found her the last time, when she’d taken it too far, I begged and cried for her to stop.
I think she’s listened to me.
I didn’t want to tell her parents that was how she dealt with their neglect and abuse. She begged me not to tell them, but I would break that trust to save her life.
I throw my arm around her, pulling her against me, surprised when she sinks into me. She wraps her arms around my waist. I feel like a shit friend. We haven’t hung out much lately. Between us both working and Ian, I don’t see her much even though she lives right next door.
When I hang out with her I like one-on-one time. It’s one of the reasons why she hasn’t even met Jamie yet. Not that I think they won’t like each other, I just like hanging out with her alone. She’s still my number one.
“What are you thinking about?” I murmur a kiss into her hair. Bright pink now. Silky soft still, and I have no idea how she keeps it so healthy with the amount of dollar-store dye it’s seen.
“Thinking about where Ian’s going to hide your body.”
I chuckle, kissing her one more time. “This is it, Grems. It’s our dream.”
“Sometimes dreams can dress up like nightmares.” She slips out of my arms and grabs my hands in hers. “Ian is going to kill you.”
“Oh, he’s going to fucking kill me.” I laugh. “It was a steal.”
“Like it was stolen and abandoned, because that’s the only thing that makes sense.”
“I’m not saying it’s going to be easy.” I’ve known Anna since kindergarten when her mom and dad moved into the trailer next to us.
For the first time in my life I wasn’t alone.
My mom, she’s okay, she just wasn’t ready to be a mom.
She’s never known what to do with me. I didn’t make it easy on her, I know that, but meeting Anna .
. . that was fate. Just like Ian. Anna has always been by my side. I’d die for this girl.
She’s my world in the most incredible and platonic way possible.
“Madds.”
“Trust me.”
“Oh, babe, I trust you. What I don’t trust is that Ian won’t strangle you.”
Yeah, my man will be an issue. “He’ll be fine.” I hope. “Or he’ll leave me and you’ll have to nurse my broken heart.”
“I’d sooner eat it still beating.” She looks up with a grin. “Ugh, don’t say it.” She fake wretches. “Don’t do it. Please spare me.”
I wiggle my brows. “I love him, Grems.”
She bends at the waist as if she’s going to hurl all over the chipped linoleum floor.
She takes a deep breath, fanning herself.
“I know you do. I love that you’re in love.
Even if I find it disgusting. Seriously, you couldn’t have at least tried with women?
Men are ugh.” Her face twists with a grimace.
“Sorry. I’m just so madly in love with you that no other woman will do.”
That makes her laugh and she shoves me off her. “You’re an idiot.”
“Yeah, well, we’re about to see if I’m an idiot with a broken heart.”
I watch her kick her shoe on the dirty floor. “He better not hurt you,” she says softly then looks at me. “I like Ian. I really do, but . . .” She shakes her head. “He better treat you right. You deserve the world Maddy.”
“Oh my god, Anna.” I tuck her into my arms. “You are into me.”
She rips her body away from me. “And we’re done here.”
“Anna, please, I had no idea—” I plead with her as she heads out the door. “Let me make sweet love to you on this rotting linoleum floor.” She rips her hand away the moment I catch it.
“You’re an asshole.”
“I am.” I laugh harder, pulling her into my arms, and she concedes, wrapping her arms around my waist and hugging me. “You’re still my favorite person, Grems.”
“And you’re still the biggest pain in my ass.” She lifts her head. “Now, call Ian and let him see this shithole. Call me if he doesn’t end your life.”
“Maddox. What the fuck.”
Ian does this thing when he’s panicking. His fingers dive into his hair and he squeezes the strands. Then his eyes get real big like he’s trying to murder the problem with them. “I know, but—”
I watch his jaw pop. “Are you fucking joking? You’re joking. This is a joke. This can’t—this is too much.”
“Ian—”
“I don’t know the first thing about running a fucking business! Before you, I didn’t even know how to tattoo.”
“Ian—”
“What if we fail? What if this doesn’t work, and then what? Where would that leave us?”
“Ian—”
“What if you leave me—” I scoff. “It’s not funny! I’m fucking serious. Where would that leave us? What if we fight more because of the stress or you get tired of me and we break up and then we—”
“Ian!” I startle at my own voice. A nervous hand runs through my hair. His bluish eyes land on me. Scathing. I remember him at that diner years ago, head down, worry etched on his face. I wanted to make him smile then, and now he has my heart forever. “I love you.”
The panic melts off his face, replaced with confusion. “Oh, good. My fears are all gone. Just like that. Great job, Maddy.”
I shove my hands into my pockets and take a step toward him. I lean in, pressing my lips against his. “Absolute fireflies.”
He rolls his eyes. “It’s butterflies.”
I shake my head. “Butterflies don’t glow, and you make me glow.”
His eyes narrow. “Ew. That was a horrible line.”
“You’re a little erect right now.” I wink. “Admit it.”
“You’re an idiot.”
“But I’m your idiot.” I kiss him again and feel him soften in real time, then I put on my serious suit and cup his face.
“I love you and you will never be alone. Do you hear me? Never. Once you’re mine that’s it, Ian.
You’re in here forever.” I bring his hand to my chest. My man just needs a little coaxing.
A little nudge to get the ball rolling. He’s stubborn and afraid, but also brilliant when he lets go.
“You don’t know that.” He shakes his head, tension contorting his features.
“I do know, because it’s going to have to take a force unlike anything I’ve ever experienced to take me away from you.
” I grab his hands in mine, rubbing the backs with my thumbs.
“This is it for me.” I try to pull his attention back to me and not the crumbling shop around us.
“You are it for me. You hear me? I’ve never felt like this in my life and I never will again. ”
“You’re twenty-two.” He blinks at me flatly.
“Twenty-two, forty-two, sixty-two. I don’t give a fuck. You’re mine, so fucking mine, and unfortunately for you, I’m yours too. I’m a fuckup, but you’ll never have to do anything alone. Not while I’m here. I plan to make dumbass decisions just like this for the rest of my life.”
“Which will be a lot shorter if you keep buying buildings without asking me.”
I kiss his jaw, laughing as he remains as stoic as possible. “I love you so much.”
He swallows. “I’m trying to be angry with you, asshole.”
I grab him to me, kissing him again. “This is going to be a lot of work, I’m not saying it’s not, but this is our dream, right? His lips purse and he nods. “You don’t have to worry one pretty hair on your pretty head.” I smile at his eye roll. “All you have to do is tattoo and be gorgeous.”
“I hate you.” He shrugs. “You may love me, but I hate you.”
I smile. “Hate how cute I am maybe.”
His lips wobble until he slips out a laugh. “I hate that the most.”
I bite his neck. “You really don’t.”
His arms go around my neck with a deep sigh. “I really, really don’t.”