12. Fireworks Are Still Explosive
FIREWORKS ARE STILL EXPLOSIVE
PAIGE
I heard the front door creak open and hushed voices as the guys piled inside. They were quiet, but I’d be shocked if they hadn’t brought girls home. It was a night of celebrating—I wasn’t new here. This was our last night in Colhead, and they’d been pretty tame in the time we’d been here.
When we first arrived, I assumed it would be a party every night where they brought endless women home from the bars. I was mentally preparing myself to see at least three pairs of tits when girls walked to the bathroom in the middle of the night.
I was pleasantly surprised when most nights we all hung out in the living room, just the four of us.
We drank, laughed, and played video games.
I had videos of Tweety doing his victory dance when he was victorious in three rounds of Mario Kart and of Buck playing classic country songs on his guitar on the front porch at sunset.
I even had videos of Cash at the rodeos, Cash playing pool at the bar, and Cash with his cute little frown when the boys woke him up with water guns—okay, there were a lot of videos of Cash.
Even during all of those good times, not one of them had brought a woman home.
I wondered if it was because of my presence or if this was just who they really were.
Back home, the ranch hands acted like womanizers, and I never gave it a second thought.
It came with the lifestyle. Maybe they weren’t as bad as I once believed them to be.
Or maybe they are.
I pulled the covers up to my chin and replayed the night again in my head as a tear escaped down my cheek.
I knew Cash wasn’t being serious when he put his hat on my head, but to hear him basically call me a charity case stung.
He went through the whole act just so I couldn’t sleep with another man, and wanted to make it clear to his friends that being with me would be embarrassing.
Who does that?
I was so mad at myself for allowing Cash back behind my defenses—for allowing myself to live in that fantasy for a few hours, despite my better judgment.
I remembered the boy who used to sit up with me late into the night as I analyzed his birth chart during my zodiac phase.
I remembered the boy who held me in my childhood bedroom when I tried on my senior prom dress and cried because my date canceled at the last minute.
I remembered the boy who told me he would make that boy bleed and insisted I was better off going alone than with someone who didn’t deserve my time.
I remembered the boy who I could call any time just to chat about what was on my mind.
But I hadn’t known that boy in eight years—not since the day I took a risk and ruined it.
If I had kept my feelings to myself, none of this would have happened. I could have maintained our friendship and dealt with the longing crush for my entire life in silence.
I couldn’t wait to get on the plane tomorrow and have a whole week out of Cash’s grasp.
He was intoxicating and all-consuming when we were this close.
Without his watchful eye, I could drink what I wanted, kiss as many men as I wanted, and know that no one was looking over my shoulder to ruin the fun.
The distinct closing of doors caught my attention as the house fell silent. I figured the coast was clear, so I got up and padded out to the bathroom. I took one look at my puffy face in the mirror and made a promise to myself that I would no longer cry over Cash Leonard.
Once my face was washed and I was able to calm myself, I opened the door and flicked the light off. When I stepped into the hallway, a hand wrapped around my bicep and twisted me so my back was against the wall.
The familiar smell of smoky leather and bourbon filled my nose as he crowded my small frame. My breaths came in heavy as Cash lowered his mouth to my ear.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered.
I could barely make out his silhouette in the dark, but it didn’t matter. My senses came alive as he inched closer to me.
I should have pushed him away. I should have slapped him. I should have screamed.
“For what?” I whispered back, my heart beating at an unhealthy rate.
“Where do I start?”
“From the beginning.”
He chuckled deeply, his breath so close I could feel it against my lips. “For starters, I’m sorry for not kissing you how you deserved to be kissed.”
He didn’t say when he didn’t kiss me back—he didn’t have to.
“How do I deserve to be kissed?”
“I want to show you.”
Cash’s hand came up to grip my jaw as the other snaked around my waist and pulled me into him. This was a bad idea, but no part of me wanted to stop.
“Just once?” he asked.
“Just once,” I agreed in a daze.
Cash’s mouth closed the small distance and heat took over my entire body.
His lips were firm as they demanded mine.
He tilted my jaw up with the hand firmly planted there as he deepened the kiss and nipped at my bottom lip, urging me to open up for him.
The moment I did, his tongue delved into my mouth, and we were a mess of exploring hands and tangled tongues.
Cash’s hands found my ass and he pulled me closer as I gripped his hair. A soft moan escaped his lips as I bit down and grinded my body into his.
The kiss was everything I thought it would be—it was electric. The two of us giving in to what we craved under the mask of darkness.
Suddenly Cash pushed away, and I immediately missed his touch. Our heaving breaths were the only sound in the quiet, dark hallway.
He placed one more soft kiss on my lips and walked back to his room, shutting the door behind him.
I slumped against the wall, unsure if that actually happened or if this was a wonderful dream.
“Good night, Jesse,” I whispered as I brought my fingers to my lips hoping to savor his taste.
I didn’t move for a few seconds, completely shaken.
Just once.
The worst promise I had ever made.
I walked back to my room and crawled under the covers. I wasn’t sure if I was elated that I knew what Cash’s lips felt like on mine, or devastated that now I had the only taste I would ever get.
The next morning, I woke up to the smell of fresh coffee and bacon wafting in from the kitchen.
I changed into the leggings and crewneck sweatshirt I was going to wear to the airport, and zipped up my suitcases before wheeling them out to the living room.
There was a black suitcase waiting by the door, which was odd considering the guys weren’t leaving until later in the day to head back to Ashton Creek for the week.
I walked into the kitchen and plopped into a chair as Tweety placed a coffee in front of me. I’d learned he was quite domestic when he needed to be and that he was actually a decent cook.
“Thank you, Tweety,” I said with a sweet smile.
“No problem, P. I made some breakfast, too. Are you ready? We’re all leaving for the airport in twenty.”
“All?”
As soon as the word came out of my mouth, Cash waltzed into the room with his backpack slung casually over his shoulder.
“Uh, what’s going on?” I looked between Tweety and Cash.
Tweety pinned Cash with a hard look and crossed his arms. “You didn’t tell her?”
“Tell me what?”
“I’m coming to Vegas,” Cash said flatly, not even a hint of the sweet man who kissed me showing on his face.
“Like hell you are,” I snapped sternly.
“Owen invited me.” He shrugged and started pouring a cup of coffee, like the man didn’t just blow up my entire peaceful week.
This was the worst thing that could happen. Not only was my carefree vacation now going up in flames, but the man had kissed me last night and now I had to sit back and watch him gallivant around a bachelor party.
Fuck that.
I stood and stormed out of the room and through the front door for some much needed fresh air. It felt like someone was sitting on my lungs and I was just letting it happen. I pulled up my sister’s contact and sent a very strongly worded text to the bride-to-be.
Leaning onto the porch railing, I took a deep breath.
This was happening and there was no way I could stop it, but I could set ground rules.
As much as I loved that kiss last night, I now held power over Cash. We shared a secret and if I had to, I would use it to my advantage.