Chapter 41
S omething had changed.
She wasn’t sure how or exactly when, but Matthieu was acting odd.
You haven’t known him that long. Maybe this is normal for him.
But it wasn’t normal to volunteer to be someone’s bodyguard for free. He was risking his life taking care of her . . . and for what?
For her sparkling wit and company?
Huh.
And what did he mean that taking care of her wasn’t work?
Right now, she felt like she was far more trouble than she was worth. The numb was supposed to help her get through this. Instead, it kept slipping away as though it couldn’t survive under his warm gaze.
He’d started driving again and she found herself just staring at him.
“What is it, Bébé?”
“I don’t know if you should call me that.”
“Why not?”
“Um, well, it’s not . . . I’m not . . . shoot.” She couldn’t get her words out.
“You’re not what? My client? No, you’re not.”
That wasn’t what she’d been about to say. But was that what had changed? Was he acting different because her father was no longer paying him?
What did that mean?
“I’m so confused.” And she was getting a headache.
“Don’t think about it right now, Spitfire,” he told her soothingly. “Just relax and let me take care of everything.”
She groaned.
That was exactly what she wanted to do. But she couldn’t do that, could she?
For most of her life, she’d had to take care of herself. Be strong and independent. Leaning on a man she had only known a few weeks wasn’t wise.
Tempting, but not wise.
“The way I see it, you can look at this time as a bad thing or you can think of it as a reset. Almost like a holiday. You’re safe. There’s no way for him to track you.”
“A holiday? My life is a shambles.”
“We’re going to fix everything. I promise.”
It would be so nice to believe that. And it wasn’t like her life had been perfect to begin with. Sure, her house was smoke and fire-damaged but she did have insurance.
And maybe she didn’t have all her babies with her, but she had a new friend that was taking care of them.
Perhaps she had lost her job, but the puppies had been rescued and that’s the main reason she’d been working there. Sure, she wished she could find another job quickly. But she had a bit of savings she could use.
Enough for a few weeks off work.
“You’ll let me know what bills you have to pay and I’ll take care of them.”
Um. Nope.
Bad enough she couldn’t pay him but she certainly wasn’t going to take his money.
“I have enough money to cover my bills,” she informed in a huff.
“For how long?” he asked as he pulled up in front of a log cabin.
Oh, this place was cute. It was the quintessential log cabin, nestled in the woods around it. There was a small front porch that had actual rocking chairs on it.
Adorable.
It was the sort of place where she would love to live if she had the choice. Plenty of room for her babies and to adopt more. No neighbors to complain or interfere.
Her dream would be to have a kind of animal sanctuary. Where unwanted and abused animals could come and live safely. Maybe she’d end up adopting some out . . . maybe she wouldn’t.
“Maya? Maya, you with me? Or am I dealing with zombie Maya?”
“Huh?” She turned to him, blinking. “What?”
“I asked you a question.”
“You did?”
Amusement filled his face. “I can see I no longer have your attention. That could hurt my feelings.”
“It doesn’t,” she stated.
“It doesn’t?”
“No, you’re far too sure of yourself to be worried about my inattention.”
“I wouldn’t be too sure of that,” he murmured as she snuck peeks at him.
Drat. The numb had disappeared again and now she was feeling far too much.
And his sexiness was back to affecting her.
Reaching out, he cupped her chin. “You’ve gone all shy on me, huh? I thought you were getting past that.”
“I’m working on it.”
“Yeah?” He moved closer. What was he doing? A tendril of something unfurled inside her.
Panic?
Or want?
Both, most likely.
“How are you working on that?” he asked.
“By looking at you for small moments at a time. I’ve been trying to get myself more used to your, um, face.”
“You like my face?”
“How is that even a question?” she asked. “You know I like your face. Who wouldn’t? You’re gorgeous.”
“I’m not the one who is gorgeous, beautiful girl,” he murmured. “But thank you.”
Then his hand cupped her cheek. Was he going to kiss her? Did she want that?
Of course she wanted that.
And then his face grew close to hers and his lips touched hers.
Part of her wondered if she’d built it up too much and it would fizz out.
But this was even better than she’d expected.
His lips were warm. They were soft and firm at the same time.
How that was the case, she didn’t know. She couldn’t explain it.
All she knew was that he was being gentle, yet at the same time he was firmly in charge. His hand slid around to the back of her neck as he deepened the kiss.
Maya found herself melting into him. Reaching out, she wound one hand around his neck.
She wanted to be closer to him. She attempted to move, to crawl into his lap, but she was brought up by something which pulled her back.
Before she could figure out what was going on, something wet swiped over her cheek.
Ew.
What the heck?
Why would he lick her? She drew back, wiping at her cheek. Just as a furry body landed in her lap, his back feet on her thighs and front feet on her chest.
His tongue came out again and swiped her chin.
“Ew, okay, that’s gross, Dougie. Your breath smells like garbage.”
“He certainly has interesting timing.”
She glanced over at Matthieu, worried he might be mad at Dougie for interrupting them. But he looked more amused than anything else.
“Got to admit, I thought it was you licking my cheek for a moment,” she said.
“Hmm, you’re not fond of being licked, Bébé?” he queried.
Was he . . . did he . . . he couldn’t mean . . .
Before she could question him, he’d opened the door and gotten out.
Dougie let out a woof and waggled his tail as he stared up at her.
“I don’t know why you look so pleased with yourself,” she told him. “I was enjoying that.”
Another woof and he gave her a doggy smile. She found herself smiling. It was impossible to remain grouchy at Dougie.
He was just too darn cute.
Where was she?
After checking the cabin over, Matthieu had helped her walk the animals so they could pee and then they’d taken them inside. He’d told her to get them settled while he got everything inside.
And now he’d lost her.
The cabin was larger than he’d expected, but it wasn’t enormous.
So there couldn’t be that many spaces for her to hide.
Dougie and Gummy were sniffing around the living room.
Princess Priss was sitting on the back of the sofa, watching them with some alarm.
He stopped to pat and reassure her. To his relief, she started to purr.
So hopefully she wasn’t too upset by the temporary move.
He peered into an open doorway and noticed that Tank and Big B were settled into one bedroom. He walked further down the hallway. Main bedroom with attached bathroom which he’d leave for Maya. Another bedroom. A shared bathroom.
And then there was one last room.
Hmm. He had an idea what this room was and if she was in there . . . well, that would be interesting.
He knew the owner of this cabin, Hayes, never used it anymore. He’d lost his wife, his Little, and this place held a lot of memories for him. Apparently he couldn’t stand to be here but he also couldn’t get rid of the cabin.
Matthieu understood that feeling. And he was certain that Maya would too. The idea of loving someone so much that you couldn’t live without them . . . yeah, he’d experienced that.
Maya had lost her mother. He’d lost both of his parents . . . when he should have only lost one.
When he opened the door, he found her kneeling in the middle of the playroom. It looked like a bedroom fit for a princess. There was a bed in one corner with a white bedspread on it. It had fairies on it. Over the bed was a lacy, white canopy.
Sweet and girly.
He didn’t think it would be his girl’s style, exactly, but it was extremely cute.
In addition to a bed there was also an oversized crib. He wondered how young Maya would regress. If she even knew how young she would regress to. Because he figured she might not have ever had the chance to explore her Little.
It seemed she liked Lego, but that didn’t help him judge anything else she liked.
He’d left her box of Lego in a cupboard in the living room. Maybe he should bring it in here.
His girl was kneeling on a pink rug on the floor and studying some books on a bookshelf next to a desk. She pulled one out and looked at something written inside the front cover.
He thought about sneaking out of the room . . . but this seemed like an ideal opportunity to talk to her.
Matthieu cleared his throat and she jumped, turning around and falling back onto her bottom.
“You gave me a fright!” she complained with her hand on her chest.
“Sorry, Bébé,” he said. “I didn’t mean to scare you. What are you doing?”
“Nothing.” She jumped to her feet and wobbled slightly. He moved forward and grabbed hold of her hips. “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to pry or anything. Was this a child’s room?”
“A child? I think you know it’s not a child’s room. The crib is rather large, don’t you think?”
She bit her lip, glancing at the oversized crib. “Um, yes. It’s a room for a Little, right?”
“Right.”
She winced. “And I’m in here. I shouldn’t be. This is a very private space. I’m surprised they don’t lock the door.”
“Actually, the owner of this cabin never comes here anymore. He lost his wife who was also his Little.”
“This was her playroom,” she whispered sadly.
“Yes.”
“We still shouldn’t be in here.”
“I don’t know . . . maybe this is a room that deserves to be used.”
“But wouldn’t . . . I mean . . . it should be a Little who . . . who uses this place. Right?”
“Right. A Little should use this place. Would you like to use it?”
She gaped at him.
“You can say no,” he told her. “But don’t lie and don’t say no because you’re scared of what I will think of you. Because I will always think you are amazing. And wonderful. And sweet. And as a Daddy Dom myself, I would be pleased to help you with whatever you need.”
“You’re a Daddy Dom?”
“I am. Although I prefer to be called Papa.”
“I should have guessed. You’re rather bossy and you think you always know what’s right, plus you love rules and consequences.”
He grinned. “Is that what you think a Daddy Dom is? Someone who is bossy, thinks they’re always right, and loves rules and consequences?”
“Well, yeah.”
He huffed out a laugh and then let go of her hips before taking her hand and leading her to the bed. He had her sit on the side of the bed before he kneeled in front of her. In this position, he hoped she wouldn’t feel as intimidated.
Then he took hold of her hands. They were cold and he wrapped his large hands around hers.
“Have you ever had a Daddy Dom before?” he asked even though he had asked her that before. But he was certain she didn’t remember that.
“No. Never.” A flush of red filled her face before it drained away and left her pale. “How did you know? Did I . . . did I give it away?”
“There were a few things. Sometimes, when you’re tired, you’d let things slip. You’d speak in a Little voice. You slept with a stuffed toy. It was in the way you reacted when I would call you a Little girl or a good girl. And I also found your box of Lego.”
Her gaze narrowed as she glared down at him. “You went searching in my closet?”
“I didn't,” he replied firmly. “Butch was looking for your dolphin and he thought he might be able to get you some clothes. He found the box of Lego. It looked like some of it was half-built.”
“I built a village in the spare bedroom,” she told him. “The one I had to clear out so you could stay there. I didn’t have a lot of time, so I just shoved it all in a box. And then I couldn’t get it out to fix it.”
Poor Bébé. She looked so sad.
“Perhaps we can fix it together,” he suggested.
She bit her lip and for a moment, she looked so hopeful that he thought she would say yes.
To his surprise, she shook her head. “No thanks. I better go and check on Tank.” She tried to slide away.
But he wasn’t letting her go that easily.
“Why not?” he asked. “Is it because you don’t want me to be your Papa?”