Chapter 3 #2
“Don’t tell me you love me.”
Did I just say that out loud? What the actual fuck.
“Don’t say I love you. Got it.”
I resist the urge to face palm myself.
“It would just be weird, and I hate lies, even though it’s a part of the roleplay, I guess,” I nervously begin to explain, stopping myself just before it becomes too lengthy. “I’m going to shut up now.”
He lets out a small, unbothered laugh. “I mean it’s understandable at least. A lot can be said in character. Typically, I keep those words out of my mouth, though. Keep it professional.”
“Yeah, of course.” After careful consideration, I inhale a small breath. “Okay. Ready when you are.”
“You sound nervous, princess,” he subtly accuses.
There’s a strong shift in his voice, the same tone he uses occasionally in his private, server-only based streams. It's as if he’s flipped a mental switch. He’s being flirty…so goddamn seductive. Except this time, there is no audience. He’s not entertaining his fanbase.
It’s only the two of us.
One on one.
Tonight, he’s entertaining me.
“I’m not nervous,” I deny with a playful edginess.
“No?” he questions, sarcasm thick in his tone. “Don’t worry. I think it’s cute.”
“I’m not nervous at all. I’m good. So good.”
“And so fucking eager,” he breathes sharply.
My stomach flips. I guess I’m not sure what to expect, but I truly did not expect that guttural sound to leave his chest. I’ve barely ever sexted anyone in my life, not even my past boyfriends, so this is already a wild experience for me.
But if I planned on doing this with anyone, it would be him.
“Tell me what you want from me,” he says, and it comes out like an order.
“I’m not sure. You know I’ve never done this before.”
“Well, what do you like?”
“I’m honestly not sure,” I admit. “I guess my sex life has always been pretty…boring?”
“Got it,” he says. “You like to read. Name something in those romance books that I could play off of for you.”
“Good girl comes to mind.”
“That’s an easy one. You’ve probably already been called a good girl before though,” he assumes.
Silence hangs between us.
“Hold on. Have you…not?”
My stomach flutters. “I don’t believe so,” I answer honestly.
“Oh, wow. Really?”
“If I was ever called a good girl in bed, it definitely didn’t land.”
“What a damn shame,” he mutters, almost annoyed. Join the club, Lucien. Now we’re both disappointed. “Can I have the honor tonight?”
My face flushes with heat.
“Yes,” I answer.
“Love that for me. It’s an honor. Truly.”
“Degradation, also,” I reveal, reaching toward my bedside table and turning off the light.
Several neon lights softly illuminate my bedroom, along with the faint city lights through my floor to ceiling window.
“Oh.” A sadistic chuckle escapes him, catching me off guard. “Definitely pegged you for having a praise kink, but degradation, huh?”
Even though he can’t see me, I nod.
“Such a dirty fucking girl,” he laughs. “You want this so fucking bad. You need this, don’t you?”
I nod.
“Remember, I can’t see you. You need to respond out loud for me, baby.”
Baby. Oof.
“I need this,” I softly ease out.
“Do us both a favor and drop this innocent act. You and I both know you’re the furthest thing from innocent,” he boldly accuses.
Well, shit. He’s not wrong. I’ve had some wild, dirty fantasies for a long time. More than I can count. I’ve just never had anyone to act them out with before.
Until tonight.
“You sure you want this?” he questions, mockingly.
“I’m sure,” I breathe.
“You want to be used like the filthy fuck toy I know you are. Isn’t that right?”
Clenching my thighs, I squirm in bed. Suddenly there’s a sensation of butterflies in my stomach. My steady breaths have somehow become shallow. Holy shit, that was hot. I didn’t think I would fold like this, but here I am.
Folded.
“Yes,” I answer, playing along. “Use me.”
“Not until you beg,” he counters. “Beg for me to use you.”
Oh, shit. This got personal. Beg for him to use me. Right now… I wouldn’t mind that one bit.
With a nervous inhale, I obey. “Please?” I say, although it sounds awkward as hell and comes out more a question than a statement.
“That’s all you got?” he humors. “How fucking pathetic.”
Mmm. Oh, that hit. Tell me how pathetic I am.
“Do you want to be used?”
“I do,” I respond swiftly, quivering.
“Then fucking beg for it.”
“Please,” I beg, a bit louder this time, my pulse quickening.
“No,” he denies.
No?
Did he just deny me? Am I being edged right now? What the fuck.
A soft moan falls from my lips. Why was that so fucking hot?
“Such a pathetic, needy little slut. Do what you’re fucking told and use your voice. I said beg.”
“Please, Lucien,” I frantically whimper, my voice dripping with an urgency I’ve never experienced before. “Please use me like the dirty, pathetic slut I am. Please. I just want to be fucking used. Please.”
“There it is,” he groans with approval. “Look at you, being such a good girl for me.”
Suddenly, there’s a heartbeat between my legs. I find myself squeezing my thighs together in a weak attempt to create some friction, my wetness already apparent.
Yup. That one landed.
Hard.
So fucking hard.
There’s definitely a big difference between hearing him spout it on stream versus in a private call. There’s no audience here. He’s speaking to me directly. Curse my hard nipples and labored breathing.
“Look how desperate you are. You’re nothing but a set of holes. Only good for getting used and fucked. Isn’t that right, princess?”
Half shocked and half soaked, I gasp for air, exhilarated by this play. I’m quiet for a moment, quivering from head to toe.
I’m so fucking turned on.
“More,” I encourage.
More, more, more.
“I bet you wish everyone could see how much of a greedy, worthless cum slut you are. Tell me how greedy and worthless you are.”
I hum quietly. Is this real life?
“Use your words,” he instructs.
“I’m so greedy, so worthless,” I say, stifling moans.
Is this what submitting feels like? If it is…I like it.
“Now I want you to do something for me.”
“Okay,” I say faintly.
“Spread your legs.”
Without any hesitation, I obey, giving in completely.
“Did you listen? Were you a good girl for me?” he inquires.
“Yes,” I softly reply. “I was a good girl.”
“Such a good fucking girl,” he groans sharply, sounding breathless and tense. “I’m so proud of you, baby.”
Holy shit.
Yes, please. Give me all the praise.
“Now tell me something,” he orders. “Are you wet for me?”
God, yes.
“Yes,” I answer honestly.
“That pretty pussy is soaked and aching to be filled, isn’t it?”
A sharp breath gets trapped in the back of my throat. He’s right. He couldn’t be more right. Shutting my eyes, I give in fully to the blissful, tingling sensation that washes over me from head to toe. My breathing quickens without warning. It’s so obvious I’m sure he can hear it.
I’m just so taken aback. This kind of play is everything I’ve been craving and yet missing from all my past partners. Sex has never been enjoyable for me, and through this experience I’m realizing that this is something I need from a relationship.
A future requirement.
With a racing heart, my breathing hitches. I haven’t even touched myself and I’m so close to the edge. My fingers find their way to the top of my thigh. I lightly caress my skin, inching closer to my center, and moan softly at the anticipation.
He catches it.
“That’s right,” he approves, breathing hard. “Fuck. You deserve to be worshipped like the goddess that you are. Don’t you ever fucking settle for less again. Do you understand me?”
“Yes,” I whisper, breathing hard.
“Say it,” he demands.
“I understand.”
“You won’t, what?”
“I won’t settle for less ever again,” I announce, tracing the crease of my inner thigh, a shiver running down my spine, neck, and arms. “Shit…”
“Do you want more?”
“I do,” I answer painfully, craving more.
So much more.
God, I want it.
Although strictly platonic, this roleplay is more exhilarating than I ever could have imagined.
I never in a million years ever would’ve thought I’d be seconds away from coming undone just to the sound of someone’s voice.
I’ve only ever read about this in books, and here I am, finally experiencing it first-hand.
“Mmm,” he hums. “Tell me what you’re feeling right now.”
“Really, really hot. Hot and… bothered.”
“Where are your hands?”
My stomach clenches. “My thigh,” I reveal.
“So close,” he lets out, inhaling a sharp, sudden breath. “Do you want to move them closer?”
“Yes,” I let out in a hushed moan, trying to hide it, yet failing miserably. “I want this so bad.”
Was that feral voice mine?
For a second, I almost couldn’t recognize myself.
Do it, Nora. Fucking do it. Let go.
Have some fun for once in your boring life!
“Use your fingers for me, baby,” he instructs. “Tell me when they’re there.”
“I need more than just my fingers,” I whimper, moaning at the thought of being filled. By him.
“Yeah? You want to be stretched?”
Fuck, yes.
Yet, the second my fingers find their way between my legs, my eyes shoot open.
Reality hits me.
“Wow, okay, we can end it here,” I rush out, willing myself to breathe. “For tonight, at least,” I mumble incoherently.
Holy shit. It had to end there. Getting lost in the moment was way too easy. I was so tempted to act on it. Too tempted.
That’s a line I can’t cross with a friend, even if it’s business. Or…can I?
“Research purposes, right?” I joke, awkwardly, squeezing my thighs together in a lousy attempt to soothe the ache. Damn, I’m wet.
“Absolutely.”
“That was something else,” I admit, stunned with how much I enjoyed the experience. “I got lost in the moment. That was insane.”
“A good insane, I hope?”
“Yeah. Just didn’t want to let it go too far, you know,” I confess.
“Whatever you’re comfortable with.”
“At least now I have a better understanding of what phone sessions with you are like.”
He chuckles. “I tamed it down,” he admits.
“Did you?”
“Just a bit. For tonight, at least,” he reiterates.
Oop. He must’ve caught when I mentioned that earlier. For tonight. As if I already plan on having another session with him. No chance in hell…
…Or?