Chapter Forty-Five
Caleb
That night, I couldn’t sleep. Without the sound of Jay’s mouth breathing, I was too undisturbed. Without her constant tossing and turning, I had too many blankets. Without her night terrors, I didn’t have an excuse to hold her until they went away.
What’s more, her scent still lingers, haunting me. I’d wash the sheets, but that’d be the second stupid thing I’ve done in the past twenty-four hours.
I couldn’t stand being in there much longer.
My wolf and I escaped to the forest, where I ran as fast as I could away from what I’d done.
I fucked up.
I’m glad she didn’t just take what I said lying down but from the pain in her voice, on some level, she internalized it. She should’ve done more. I wish she had done more. Yell at me, call me names, even punch me—hell, I deserved it.
She’s not the monster.
I am.
I can’t believe I snapped like that. She didn’t deserve it at all. It’s no excuse, but the pressure got to me. I finally got out of my own way to forgive her and tell her how I truly feel, when everything imploded.
I’m not sorry for setting fire to the ones who hurt her, but I am kicking myself because of what it’s led to now.
This is why I try so hard never to let shit get to me.
I pride myself on my ability to stay calm.
It was my superpower in a way—it made me feel impenetrable.
Drunk on my own “power,” with too much of it, it became my kryptonite.
I kept everything in, trying to pretend like nothing bothered me.
But in the end, I took myself out and dragged Jay down with me.
The only person she needed protection from was me. Her expression . . . I did that to her. And it’ll haunt me for the rest of my life.
We had a fight. That’s all. It’s fine. This one didn’t end in a stabbing, so I’d say that’s improvement, I try to convince myself. But our past fights were on an even playing field. This didn’t seem like just a fight—my displaced anger and Jay’s whiplash made this target practice.
I’ve made so many mistakes with us.
Because of how I treated her, my own people didn’t respect her. They branded her like cattle. I’ve imprisoned her, stabbed her, isolated her.
I look up to the sky. The Moon Goddess is right to turn her back on me. I never deserved a mate—especially someone as incredible as Jay. She deserves so much better than I’ve offered her.
I hate that I reacted the way I did. But she kept talking, time was ticking, and I couldn’t think. It was the pressure. Still no excuse. I have less than seventy-two hours to find a solution, or I could lose her for good.
If I hadn’t already.
There had to be a way.
I arrive at Taya’s parents’ house, who aren’t there. They often travel during this time of year.
I bang their fancy door knocker and wait. Seconds later, Sam appears shirtless with shorts that hang loosely on his hips, with messy hair and a scowl. “It is four in the morning. What are you doing here?”
“I need an audience.”
“With?”
“Everyone. The crown. The council.”
Sam wipes the corners of his eyes to remove the crust. “This could’ve waited until a more reasonable hour.”
“You know I can’t wait that long,” I plead, not even bothering to hide the desperation in my voice.
For some reason, he takes pity on me. He sighs. “Fine. Dax will be back here for training late-morning. I’ll talk to him about setting up a meeting, then. Goodnight.” Sam goes to shut the door, but I put a hand out to stop it.
He looks at my hand, then at me, questioning my audacity. “What the—”
“I’m sorry, sir. It’s gotta be sooner than that.”
“How soon?”
“Sunrise.”
Sam’s eyes bug. “You’re out of your mind, Waller.”
“Probably.”
“That’s in two hours!”
“I know.”
My body, my entire aura, communicates the message I’m not letting it go. The stakes are too high.
“Do you understand what you’re asking? It will take two hours for Dax to get here. I would have to wake him up now and ask him to leave his bed, mate and pup—who he loves more than anyone or anything in this world—to come talk to you, who he doesn’t.”
“I know what I’m asking.”
I don’t care. I’ve lived to see another day following the king’s wrath, but losing Jay is not something I could nor want to survive.
“See, this is why we call you mutt.”
I also don’t care what anyone calls me, but yesterday proved I’m running out of patience.
I snap again. “In less than seventy-two hours I could lose the love of my life, Sam. So fine, call me mutt, call me crazy—hell, I am. People can call me whatever they want, but if I can’t call Jay mine, you’re going to be calling my—and the rest of this realm’s—time of death.
Sam blinks, and for a moment, the ins and outs of my heavy breathing is the only exchange happening between us. The door creaks as Sam opens it up a little wider. “Jay is your mate.”
A statement, not a question, from a man who recognizes mate devotion. From one doomed lover boy to another. He sees himself in me.
“Yes. And I have been beaten and shit on repeatedly for choices—some of which weren’t even mine—but I take it, every time. Not once have I argued, retaliated, complained or asked for so much as an apology. I’ve never asked anybody for a damn thing. All I’m asking for is her.”
I can’t tell if Sam is shocked more by my tone or my words. Either way, I don’t have time to think. So I beg, “Sir, please. Give me ten minutes.”
Sam bites the inside of his cheek. He tussles his hair, seeming uncomfortable. In a low voice, he says, “I never told you, but I’m sorry about your father.”
My eyes drop to the wooden porch.
“It’s hard losing a parent. Wouldn’t wish it on anyone.”
I nod, a silent thanks.
He sighs. “Fine.”
I lift my head.
He holds up a finger. “One meeting.”
“Are you serious?” I clap my hands together, pressing them to my lips with shocked glee.
“Ten minutes.”
Something between a huff and a laugh escapes my lips as I fold my hands over my head. “Yeah? Really?”
He holds out a hand to tell me to be calm, but I’m jumping with joy. “Yes, but don’t be surprised if Dax decides to kick your ass for this.”
“Thank you, sir. I won’t disappoint you.” I jog down the steps before he can change his mind. “Yes.”
“Waller?” he yells after me.
I stop and turn to face him. “Yes, sir?”
“Show up naked to my in-laws’ home again, and I’ll bury you.”
While being naked is pretty natural for wolves, there is a territorial aspect, so I understand.
I smile back and salute. “You got it.”
With a nod, Sam slams the door shut.
I mindlink Tyler. “Wake up.”
“Huh? What?”
“Meet me in my father’s study in five. We’ve got work to do.”
***
It’s nearly dawn, and Tyler and I spent the last two hours preparing for this meeting. We gathered our arguments and potential solutions to present, along with questions and counterarguments for undesirable options.
Tyler was a huge help. It’s a relief to finally rely on him and leverage our soon-to-be alpha and beta partnership.
Tyler and I are in the conference room when the sun rises, and the council filters in. Tyler and I stand as Sam, Taya, and then King Dax enter. I smooth my tie to my body. I wanted to leave no reason for the king to be any more pissed off at me.
Taya appears bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, put together as always. Sam is not as chipper but not at all as grumpy as earlier. However, the king does not look well-rested, and I fear that’s because of me. I can’t let that cripple my confidence. This is about Jay.
We stand until the king reaches his seat at the head of the table and gives me a side-eye and scowl as he drops his clipboard. His chair screeches against the floor as he scoots himself in. Once he’s settled, everyone else takes a seat as well.
King Dax tosses his pen onto the clipboard, leaning back in his chair, rubbing his index, middle and thumb together. “Will someone tell me why I had to leave my family to come to a meeting five hours earlier than I had planned?”
“Yes, Your Majesty.” I stand when speaking to him and clear my throat. “It’s regarding the matter of the dark coven. There is information I have not been forthcoming about.”
“By all means, speak,” he says in the most condescending tone, meaning to intimidate me.
“The rogue who I brought here as a prisoner is the same one my people—the pack members harmed the witch—attacked. As you are aware, the witches have proposed that I either give Jay over to them or mate their kin, Medein Rosa.”
“So, you are here to tell us that you plan to enter a spiritual bond with Medein?” the council asks in a hopeful tone.
“No. Actually, what I have to present complicates that plan.”
All eyes are glued to me, eager to hear what I have to say. I swallow hard. “Jay is my fated mate. I’ve known for quite some time.”
Everyone exchanges glances.
Taya gasps, “She is?” She rests a hand on Sam’s shoulder, and the other is clutched to her chest. Her face lights up with thrill at the news.
She’s gotten close to Jay in a sense. Jay being accepted by someone close to this pack and knowing my father well gives me hope that the rest of Bloodhound will, too.
“She is,” I say with genuine pride.
“That does complicate things,” the king mutters.
Though he couldn’t say anything.
“Does it? She’s his fated mate. I don’t think there’s any question of who he should be with,” Taya says.
“But by having Caleb accept the coven’s offer, we are avoiding a potential war,” one councilman says.
“There’s no way to know whether a war would occur. They may even come back with another offer upon hearing this news.”
“But the only other exchange they were intrigued by was my mate.” Sam places his hand over Taya’s. “I’m sorry, but I won’t risk your safety, angel.”
“A fated mate is sacred to our culture. And since Caleb can’t truly mate with a witch, Caleb’s wolf will weaken with the recognition of Jay’s existence. Surely, the witches don’t want a doomed alliance,” Taya says.
It seems Sam and Taya are on opposite ends. The council and Sam are on the same page. But the only person who can influence the ultimate decision is King Dax. Who hates my guts.
I’m not liking the odds.
The king is slumped in his chair. After silence, he stands and clears his throat. “I’ll need some time to think. I will discuss this with the coven and report back with my decision. Dismissed.”