Chapter 8
CHAPTER EIGHT
Foster threw back his head, laughter spilling out. “They are limp.”
She held up one of the fries from the pizza place against one that Foster had brought in with his burger. “What did I expect getting fries from a pizza place?”
“How do they taste, because that’s the real measure of a fry?”
She bit into the limp potato, shrugging at the lackluster taste. “Not the best.”
He took one and bit into it, his lips pulling up on the left side. “It’s okay.”
She held up the more stiff, thicker fry. “Now the other one.” She took the bite and groaned. “It’s not great either. It’s like burnt.”
Foster grabbed one and tasted it. “Oh, that’s disappointing.”
“I do like potatoes, but these weren’t great.”
Foster ate a bit of his burger before setting it down.
“With my job we travel around the world. I’ve eaten in a lot of different places, lots of dives.
I think the best fries I’ve ever had were in Ireland.
There was a small bar that was empty. Not sure why because the food was amazing.
But they had great fries. Just the right amount of crispy, great taste. ”
“Nice. I don’t think I’ve ever been to Ireland.”
Her wording was peculiar, but he didn’t question her. “So milkshake, you want chocolate, right?”
“Yes. But first. Did you ever do this when you were a kid?” She took the lid off the milkshake and dipped in a fry before popping it into her mouth.
He couldn’t help but chuckle. “Yes. Do you mind?”
She pushed the chocolate shake toward him and nodded. “Please. Dip your fry and enjoy.”
He did and moaned. “The chocolate shake makes the fries taste better.”
“It does.”
He finished his burger then sat back. “Last year I got injured and was feeling sorry for myself. I went to the store and picked up a few items that I remembered from childhood that made me feel better back then. You know, like when you were sick and your mom would get you a treat like the double meat pasta or certain pizzas. As a kid I thought they tasted great, but when I cooked them as an adult, they were terrible.”
“Really?”
“Yeah.”
“I haven’t been in a grocery store in a while. But my mom wasn’t that great. I don’t know that I have that many foods that bring back good memories.”
“I’m sorry, that sucks.”
“My mom wanted to chase after my dad. They weren’t together, but she liked running into him at functions. Often, she would leave a plate in the refrigerator with a sandwich and a pickle. Once I was five, she expected me to make my own sandwich and stopped leaving food in the refrigerator for me.”
“So she didn’t cook any meals for you?”
“No, not unless she got a new boyfriend. But her cooking was awful. I will say, the first few weeks of dating a new guy she wanted to impress the man so she would order food from a restaurant and pretend she made it.”
“Wait, how would that work?”
Pen took another bite of pizza and set the slice down. She’d eaten almost two full slices. That was more than she thought she’d be able to eat.
“She would order three servings of the exact same dish, something easy to remove from the restaurant’s take home package and put into her own dish, then set it in the oven on low and pretend to have made the food.”
“Wow, I bet that was expensive.”
She shrugged. “At the time, I had no clue. I was just happy to be getting a good hot meal that tasted good. She would only do it a few times at the beginning of a relationship. Then the guy would be hooked and stick around for a couple of months, maybe a year. Most guys never caught on that she was a shit cook and whatever she’d served them at the beginning of their relationship would never come around again. ”
“Damn, that’s dedication to a manipulation.”
Pen nodded. “You know what, it was. She was very dedicated to her manipulations. I guess my dad and her were a lot alike.”
“Did you know him well?”
She shook her head. “No. He didn’t really like me. He would use me to get back at my mom. They both used me. I guess in the end they really were meant for each other.”
“I’m sorry they were like that.”
“It’s funny, I decided before the abduction I didn’t want to grow up and be like them.”
“Parents either teach us how to be by being good examples or bad. I tried to take the best parts of my parents and incorporate it into my life.”
“That’s a good idea.” Pen picked up her slice of pizza then set it back down. She met his gaze. “I don’t know where Kaya took me. We were in three different houses during the time I was with him. I don’t know where those houses were, or what countries we were in.”
“So no idea where he could be?”
“The first place was warm, but I don’t think we were in Africa. I feel like it was Spain. Maybe it was the rhythm of the music, or the cadence people spoke in. I’m not sure.”
“That’s something to go on.”
A heavy weight settled on her as guilt hit. “I have no idea if I can help you.”
“Knowing about Spain will help.”
“What if I give you the wrong information?”
“Everything will be checked out before we move on it.”
“That’s probably a good idea.”
He nodded. “Yeah, we try.”
She took another bite of pizza and had just swallowed when something banged loudly outside the room in the hall. She jumped and maybe screamed.
“Hey, it’s okay. You’re safe.”
She blinked a few times and shook her head to clear it. Why was she reacting so much to every noise?
“It’s okay,” Foster said again.
She shook her head. “I don’t feel like it’s okay. I’m angry that I’m reacting. I swear I felt better when I was first rescued, now I’m afraid of my own shadow.”
“Recovering is hard. Your body will bounce back. It doesn’t seem like your injuries are too bad, except the weight loss.
You probably lost some muscle mass, and I don’t want to pry, but it will be hard to get that back.
I’m just speaking from the place of studying what happens to POWs.
It will take a lot to get your nutrition right. ”
“Do you think so?”
“I don’t want to stress you out. I’m sure the doctor will put you on some sort of supplements for food and vitamins.”
She wasn’t sure how she felt about her new body. She hadn’t had a period in ages, and she’d lost all the fat everyone condemned her for when she was younger, but she was too small and knew it. “At least I’m skinny.”
He shook his head. “No, I don’t think that’s a good thing. I know it’s popular to think a body type makes a woman, but it doesn’t. The person inside is more important than a number on the scale.”
“Wow, that’s a rather evolved take.”
“I’m not saying I’m not attracted to certain kinds of bodies, but at the end of the day we all change as we age. If all you want is a mannequin, then your relationship will have no depth.”
When she’d first started losing weight, she’d been okay with it, then it just got too weird. Now that she was free, she wasn’t sure about anything. Her body and mind felt wrong, like she needed a lot of work to just feel right.
“Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy to be free.
What they did to me was horrible, but I don’t know what to do.
I don’t even know that I’ve accepted that I’m free.
What does being free even mean if you’re looking over your shoulder all the time, trying to determine if the people around you are safe?
Like earlier, when I went down to get the pizza, I was so freaking scared.
If you hadn’t called when I was getting on the elevator, I think I would have freaked out. ”
“Why would you have freaked out?”
“There were other people on the elevator, and I didn’t know them. I’m not sure how I’m going to be able to work or even live. I really thought I would die.”
He leaned forward, and she looked up into his eyes.
They were dark, but now that she was closer and in good light, she could see that the inside part with color was lighter, like a rich brown mixed with the blue, and they had a ring of very dark brown or black.
A shiver snaked through her and he reached out, touching her fingers that were on the table.
“Hey, you’ll figure it out. I know it seems scary right now, but you’ll be okay.”
His words washed over her like a healing balm. Why did this man make her feel so calm? She had no idea what her next moves were, or how to exist in this world, but if she could stay friends with this man, she thought it might just work out okay in the end.