Chapter 18
Chapter Eighteen
The other mine entrance didn’t have a door but had obviously at some point, in the past year or so, housed a large animal of some kind.
More than a little relieved that it was no longer resident, Sebastian followed Nora back to the main entrance where they both put on their snowshoes again.
He didn’t plan to go far from the mine, but if they could get a handle on Summer’s direction of travel, that would be a plus for the next stage of the search.
More snow was forecast for tonight, but the new plan was for the helicopter to pick them up and fly them either back to the Incident Command Center at the ranch or back to the old NPS cabin to regroup and continue the search—depending on what was discovered in Hastings.
He took out Summer’s sneaker before Nora could ask for it and let her dog take a big inhale before she ordered Chance to “find.”
He expected the dog to head back the way they’d come. Assumed that Eastman had come to his senses and decided the wilderness was too fucking dangerous for a nine-year-old.
Instead, Chance took off toward the nearest stand of trees on the east side of the valley, heading north.
Son of a bitch.
They followed the dog, although at times he was fighting through snow that was deeper than he was tall. Somehow, he managed to keep going.
Sebastian was going to put the Labrador up for a medal when they got back.
Inside the trees, the snow wasn’t as deep, but the wind had scoured the region unrelentingly for the past twelve hours or so and erased recent tracks.
They scouted for another ten minutes with no physical sign, but the dog showed no indication of slowing down.
Sebastian stopped and checked his watch. “We should head back.”
Nora swung around, incensed. “What? No.”
“Nora, we need to meet up with the others. We need to make a plan.”
She opened her mouth to argue, but he was done. Done pretending. Done deceiving.
“Look, I know why this is so important to you.” He wanted her to trust him again. She didn’t need to hide from him or act as if this didn’t affect her in an intensely personal way. “Before we deployed, I looked you up.”
Her eyes grew huge, then she stepped away from him, wary, guarded.
“I did a Google search on you.”
Her face went still. “You investigated me?”
“Not on law enforcement databases,” he assured her. “I wanted to know who I was working with. Who was in my squad. And I found… I found articles. About what happened to you. In Vermont.”
She looked rigid. Frozen.
“I know about the abduction. I know what he did. What you survived. I know why this search is so important to you. I understand. I respect your dedication, but you need to listen to me when I say it’s time to stop this search now and regroup.”
“You’ve known this whole time.” Her voice crackled with ice.
“Yes.”
“When you asked me to coffee. When we—last night. You knew?”
“I wanted to tell you. I was going to—”
“When? After you fucked me?”
He flinched. “That’s not—”
“You had no right. No right to dig into my past! To know things about me I never chose to share.” Her beautiful eyes shone with unshed tears.
Shit. “I wanted to know who was going to be on my team. Whether I could trust them.”
Her expression shut down. “I’m a federal law enforcement officer and a highly qualified member of the local K9 SAR team. That was all you needed to know.”
He shook his head and took a step forward, but her furious glare made him stop. He was terrified he was making this worse. “What happened to you wasn’t your fault, Nora. You were a child. A victim.”
“Don’t you dare tell me what I was. You weren’t there. You don’t know.” She was shaking with what looked like fury, but beneath the fury, he could see something else.
Anger? Shame? Betrayal?
He let the silence stand. He felt rattled and unsure.
He’d thought this would reassure her. That it would help her realize he supported her and understood why she was so driven to find Summer.
That he understood why she’d pushed him away after her nightmare.
But judging by the devastation in her expression, he’d been wrong.
And maybe it had been selfish. The digging in the first place, withholding the fact he knew, telling her now after she’d pushed him away so forcefully he was worried she might never let him back inside.
“I was wrong. I shouldn’t have done it, and I apologize.”
“I do not accept your apology.” She spoke between gritted teeth. Her skin was milky with pallor, eyes like bruises. Her voice trembled when she asked, “Who else knows?”
Fuck.
He wanted to lie but couldn’t.
“Ryan. No one else, I swear. He was there when I found out.” He swallowed at the look of disgust in her gaze. “He won’t say anything.”
She turned away. Stared at the snow even though he could tell she wasn’t seeing it.
“I promise you can trust me, Nora.”
“Trust you? Are you kidding me?” Her eyes flashed with something close to hatred in their depths. “I will never trust you again.”
Chance whined and stared at him reproachfully.
Her expression made Sebastian’s gut clench. He opened his mouth to explain more, to say how sorry he was, but she held up her hand. “I need you not to talk to me right now.”
He blew out a big breath and rubbed his brow, wishing he could rewind time. Or that she’d let him in. Forgive him. She was so closed off. So angry. So isolated.
And it was all his fault. He knew that. Accepted responsibility. He’d crossed so many boundaries with this woman he didn’t recognize himself anymore.
He needed to give her space. To support her and at the same time grovel. But he also needed to lead this search, find Summer Eastman, and make sure none of his people were put in unnecessary danger. And that included Nora. Especially Nora.
After another few seconds where she looked as if she were swallowing back tears, she shoved past him and began to retrace their steps back toward the mine.
He took a moment to stare into the trees and wonder what the fuck he’d done and how he’d screwed everything up so royally.
At least they’d found this clue. He didn’t know how far ahead Eastman was, but, thanks to Nora and Chance, Sebastian was hopeful that Summer was alive and with her father.
And despite that minor win, he felt as if someone—Nora—had hammered a stake through his chest and pierced his heart. The look on her face earlier had told him she was never going to forgive him for what he’d done, and he couldn’t really blame her.
This was why he didn’t do relationships.
He didn’t know how to deal with emotions—his own or other people’s—unless it involved weapons or violence.
He should have kept his nose out of things that didn’t concern him.
Should have rejected her advances last night.
Instead, he’d dived in like a starving man, and look where it had left him—vulnerable and eager for more, like that poor, lonely, pathetic little boy he’d used to be.
Hungry for affection after being fed on a diet of abuse and neglect.
He wasn’t the kind of man a woman like Nora needed, he was too closed off and too damn wary of being hurt. But for once in his life, he wanted to drop his guard and take a risk. Pity that Nora had already written him off.
Glenn huffed as he dragged the sled through the trees and finally reached the old sawmill where his father used to bring him as a boy.
He’d skied through the night. Through the blizzard and was disappointed when it had stopped. His tracks were visible now, but Summer had Trapper beside her on the sled, so the imprints weren’t that bad—unless you knew what to look for.
He knew they were hunting him now.
Navy SEALs or maybe Doug’s motorcycle cronies pretending to be law enforcement. He’d thought about going to their camp last night and picking them off, one by one.
But more would come, and he’d still be there. He needed to move position. Let them walk into his ambush and reap what they sowed.
Not his problem if they were poking their noses somewhere they didn’t belong.
How far behind were they? Had they found the little gift he’d left for them? He grinned. Maybe they’d get real lucky and the blast would reveal a vein of gold. Might make up for the fact that some of them were dead.
Chasing a man, trying to take his only child from him…they deserved everything they got.
Summer coughed, a great wrenching sound in her chest.
It bothered him.
He needed to get them undercover ASAP and before any eyes in the sky pinpointed his position—assuming it was the government and not a bunch of sweaty bikers. He peered up, wondering if that black dot in the sky was a drone.
He slid his hand along the barrel of his rifle.
Black wings flapped.
A crow.
A fucking crow.
He relaxed and skied into the old warehouse, where decaying machinery stood like a testament to a different age. A better age. A simpler age. It was too bad, too damned bad that places like this had had to close.
Why couldn’t things be like they used to?
Simpler. Happier. He didn’t know if it was women’s rights or socialism that had fucked up this country, but whatever it was, he wanted it gone.
Not that he was sticking around to try to fix it.
He’d made his sacrifices over the years, and it had gained him nothing.
Not money. Not respect. Not the love of a good woman.
Just his dog, who jumped out of the sled and pissed on the doorpost.
“Okay, baby, time to get up now.”
Summer cried as she pushed off the blanket, attempted to stand but swayed and fell over. “Papa, I want to go home.”
“Your home is with me now.”
Her eyes gleamed with temper. “I want my mommy.”
He was shocked that she’d talked back to him. He leaned down and hissed. “Your mommy doesn’t want you no more. Who’d you think sent the bad guys?”
Her blue eyes were bloodshot and wide, her cheeks stained with tears. “I want to go home. I want to go home!”