Chapter 6
I couldn’t believe what was happening. I’d spent the entire night with Eda—talking, giving her advice, worrying about her. When I woke up in the morning and stepped into the shower, she slipped out of the room and left the hotel, fleeing from me without so much as a goodbye or a thank you.
I was furious. I wasn’t used to being ignored like that. Sure, it wasn’t like me to help people this way either, especially a stranger. But something in Eda’s eyes had gotten to me.
How could she have done this to me?
After everything I did for her the night before, she just disappeared out of nowhere. I couldn’t help feeling she had zero consideration for me.
I went down to the front desk to see if anyone had seen Eda or knew where she’d gone, thinking maybe she’d run into some trouble and needed help, but I didn’t get any useful information.
The clerk just told me with a friendly smile that she’d walked through the lobby toward the exit a few minutes earlier, as if it were the most normal thing in the world.
I was baffled and furious at the same time.
How could Eda have left without even saying goodbye?
No note, no message, no thank you… nothing! It didn’t make sense. I’d helped her, given her advice, listened to her pour her heart out, slept beside her—something I’d never done with any other woman—because she asked me to, and now she’d just vanished.
I decided to go back to the room to see if she’d left any clue behind, even a note I might have missed, something that could explain her sudden departure or at least tell me where she’d gone. I searched every corner but found nothing. No clue, no note, just the emptiness of her absence.
Anger began to bubble up inside me.
How dare she treat me like this?
I was Ayaz the Cruel—a nickname I’d earned the moment I took over the position my father left behind when he was murdered.
It was a nod to the meaning of my surname and to the fact that I’d become a ruthless baba who dealt out the cruelest punishments to traitors and enemies.
I was the head of one of the largest and most dangerous criminal organizations in the Turkish mafia, and I deserved at least an explanation, no matter what.
But then I remembered she didn’t know my true identity. She thought I was just a bartender at the bar—which I actually owned.
Had she run off like that because she didn’t think I was good enough for her? Because she thought she was above my social class? Or had she discovered who I really was and gotten scared?
Feeling powerless and confused all at once, it was as if I’d reverted to being the young Ayaz—far more affable than the man I’d become, the one who hadn’t yet committed the atrocities I was capable of now.
I sat on the bed, grabbed my phone, and called my cousin, best friend, and right-hand man, Murat, to vent.
“Murat, I need your help and your opinion on something important that happened to me,” I said, my voice heavy with frustration and hurt.
“What happened, Ayaz? Are you okay? Did you get ambushed or something? We’re all worried. You sound terrible,” he replied, concerned.
I told him the whole story, starting from the moment I got out of the shower and realized Eda had left.
He listened patiently, in silence. I was glad to have someone to talk to about this, but I still felt terrible.
Murat tried to reassure me, saying maybe she’d had a problem or an emergency and that it wasn’t my fault.
He also said he didn’t understand why I was so worked up, since she was just a stranger who meant nothing to me.
The truth was, I couldn’t shake the feeling of rejection.
She’d opened up to me and let herself be vulnerable.
In a way, I felt close to her because I knew her story.
And now Eda had disappeared without even saying goodbye.
I didn’t know what to do except feel angry and disappointed.
And I couldn’t even explain why I felt this way.
“Anyway, I understand why you’re upset, and I agree that what Eda did was unacceptable, Ayaz.” His voice was serious but understanding. “No matter what happened, she should have at least talked to you, thanked you, and said goodbye before leaving. Do you want me to come over so we can talk?”
I said yes and waited anxiously for Murat to arrive, my mind flooded with questions and theories.
Where was she now?
Why had she left so suddenly?
What had I done wrong?
Anger and confusion swirled inside me, and the only thing I knew for certain in that moment was that I needed answers. And I was determined to find them, no matter what it took. I was a powerful, stubborn man. I wasn’t used to rejection, and what Eda had done had wounded my ego.
How could she do this to me? After everything I did for her, just running away like that without even saying goodbye?
I couldn’t believe she’d done this. She’d trusted me, told me her deepest secrets, and now she’d disappeared, just like that, out of nowhere?
Had I done something wrong? Was it my fault?
Or did she think I’d taken advantage of her because she was drunk?
No, that couldn’t be it. I’d been a loyal and faithful friend, something I rarely was for anyone.
I’d done everything in my power to help her.
Maybe she’d just been playing me the whole time. Was this an enemy trap?
I paced back and forth across the hotel room, muttering angrily to myself. I even punched the wall, letting my frustration out physically.
I deserve respect, damn it!
I stopped for a moment, taking a deep breath and trying to calm down, but the anger kept burning inside me. I walked to the window and looked out, lost in thought.
What a crazy, strange girl! Maybe I'll never understand women. They're so unpredictable and mysterious. That's why I've never wanted a serious relationship, and nothing's going to change my mind about that. But I deserved at least a thank you. Didn't I?
I turned and faced the mirror, seeing the anger in my own eyes reflected back at me—all without even understanding why I felt this way.
Well, no matter what happened, I'm going to find answers.
I'm not letting this go. No woman rejects me and runs off like that without giving me an explanation, even when there's nothing between us.
Eda is going to have to explain why she did this, even if I have to turn the world upside down to find her.
I took another deep breath, my anger turning into determination. I was going to solve this mystery and understand why she'd fled like that, without saying goodbye, without a single word of thanks.
A little calmer, but still with my thoughts churning and my mind in turmoil, I sat on the hotel terrace—which I hadn't dared leave—with the panoramic view of Istanbul spread before me, when Murat finally arrived and saw the furious expression on my face.
“I can't believe Eda ran off without even saying goodbye to me, Murat,” I vented as soon as my cousin sat down beside me. “How inconsiderate!”
“Calm down, Ayaz! Maybe she had a good reason for leaving like that.”
“But she could have left me a message, don't you think? I thought that after she told me about her problem, we'd made some kind of connection, or at the very least, become friends.”
“I understand how you feel. After all, this is a new situation for you, something that's never happened before. But you just met—you don't even really know who this girl is. She might have found out that you're Ayaz the Cruel and gotten scared off.”
“Either way, it's not fair! I helped her and didn't deserve to be treated like this,” I argued. “Besides, how would she find out my true identity if she thought I was a bartender and didn't even ask my name?”
“Through social media, TV news, newspapers…” he argued. “Your face is plastered all over the crime pages.”
“I think you're right, even though she doesn't seem like the type to follow that kind of news. But I'm still really upset and confused about all this.”
“Speaking of what's really important, have you stopped to think how reckless you were last night?” he asked with concern, steering the conversation in a new direction.
“You sent all the employees home, including the security guards, and turned off your phone, making yourself unreachable, just to be alone with this girl.
We were all worried sick. Your mother and half the family couldn't even sleep.
It's like you suddenly forgot who your enemies are and how many of them there are. What if she was a trap?”
“You think I can't take care of myself, Murat?” I shot back irritably. “Eda was completely drunk, could barely stand on her own two feet. What harm could she possibly do to me? I was just curious about her tears, and something—I have no idea what—compelled me to help her.”
“She could have been faking it.” He frowned, surprised by my revelation. “Or she might not have been alone. She could have been bait for an ambush like the one your father suffered.”
“I have to admit I hadn't thought of that,” I acknowledged, frustrated. “But I still think I deserve at least an explanation from Eda, Murat.”
He placed his hand on my shoulder in a gesture of support and tried to talk some sense into me.
“I understand your frustration, Ayaz. I know that for a man who's never been rejected, the first time must be terrible. Your male pride is wounded,” he added supportively.
“But this Eda, as beautiful as she is, seems too mysterious.
For your own safety, I think it's best to forget last night and this girl.
We can't take risks—we just lost your father.
Maybe it's better that she disappeared like this.”
“You're right, Murat. I don't even know why I'm acting this way, so strangely and with so much anger, when there was nothing between us.
I'm sorry for the trouble and worry I caused yesterday,” I said with determination.
“That's exactly what I'm going to do. Better to forget my wounded ego than take unnecessary risks.”
“Unless… you've fallen in love with her at first sight,” he suggested. “Then things change.”
“Don't be ridiculous. Me? In love with someone?
The woman who can tame me hasn't been born yet.
I'd venture to say she never will be. Actually, I just wanted to understand, Murat,” I sighed.
“To know if I did something wrong or offended her, if I scared her somehow—anything. This uncertainty is eating me alive, because my intention from the start was to help her.”
“As I thought—Ayaz the Cruel never falls in love.” He encouraged me to forget, let it all go, and keep being myself. “Women are playthings in your hands. And it's better to keep it that way. After all, why take risks over a complete stranger?”
I felt a little more comforted by Murat's words.
Knowing I had someone to trust and vent to when facing tough situations meant a lot.
After that conversation and remembering what happened to my baba, my determination to forget that night and everything that happened the following morning only grew stronger.
I was motivated to move on with my life, even though Eda's green eyes, full of tears, and the fact that she'd left without even thanking me wouldn't leave my head.