5
Xan
I wake up to the sounds of laughter, and pounding feet racing past our door. There’s a high-pitched shriek and shouting about the pool, and I smile. Kids get so excited about swimming. Light streams through the cracks in the drapes and I carefully peel back the curtain, peeking outside. There’s a stunning view of the ocean and sunny, cloudless skies. What a view to wake up to. After a long, satisfying stretch, I sit up and assess my situation.
Last night I was very, very lucky. Lucky to be held in Morgan’s arms as we danced to a beautifully romantic song under the moonlight. Something I never thought I’d be able to say. And even luckier that I didn’t blurt out all of my feelings and completely ruin that moment and our friendship. Today I need to put safeguards in place so I don’t repeat that situation. Usually we’re not together twenty-four seven, which allows me enough space to keep my feelings in check. But that’s not possible here. I was terrified I’d wake up and find myself sprawled across his beautiful chest, drooling on his shoulder.
I glance at the big puppy of a man, and affection wells up inside me. His blond hair is sticking up in multiple directions and his face is completely relaxed, with a gentle smile tugging at his lips. He’s softly snoring, and I want to reach out and caress his cheek or run my fingers through his messy hair. Instead I push to my feet and head for the bathroom, grabbing my swim trunks and a T-shirt on the way. I showered last night before dinner, and my plan is to make today a pool day, so I don’t bother showering now. I’ll swing by the buffet, grab some breakfast, and head to the pool. Applying sunscreen can wait until I’m poolside, because being sticky and slick while eating is gross. Dressed, I step out into the room and glance at the bed. Morgan is now starfished across the mattress with his head under his pillow. Why is he so adorable? I find a pen and paper and leave him a note explaining my plan, then slip into my slides, grab my sunscreen, beach towel, sunglasses, and ID, and quietly leave the cabin.
At the buffet, I eat a quick breakfast, then fill my water bottle and head out to the pool. It’s crowded, but miraculously there’s a solo lounger and I stake my claim with my towel. Even at ten in the morning, it’s already hot, so I take a quick dip and come back to find Danny in the lounger next to me. He peers over his sunglasses. “Well, hello neighbor. Fancy meeting you here.”
“Hi. Guess the pool is the thing to do today.“
I glance around at the growing crowd.
Danny follows my gaze and nods. “First day at sea. It’s pretty typical.“
He glances around and then back at me. “Where’s your other half?”
“Morgan’s just a friend. We’re not together.”
There’s a sparkle in Danny’s eyes that I’m not sure I like. “That so?“
He slides his sunglasses up his nose and scoots his lounger a little closer to mine. “That’s not how it looked, but good to know.”
Wait. What’s happening? “I’m not—“
Danny holds up a hand. “Say no more. Whatever you two are to each other, it’s not my place to come between you.“
He peers over his glasses again. “Unless you’re into that. Because I could definitely be into that.”
“Morgan’s my best friend and has been for almost twenty years. We’re close but not romantically or sexually.”
He snorts. “No matter how much you wish it was otherwise?”
Glaring at him, I practically throw myself onto my lounger. “I didn’t say that.”
“You didn’t have to.“
He sets down whatever pink concoction he’s drinking and leans across the narrow space between us. “Look, it’s none of my business. I respect whatever the two of you have, do, or are to each other. No worries from me. I swear.” He pats my arm. “To prove it, I’ll let you help me pick my next conquest. The eye candy here is definitely above average.”
Even though he has the completely wrong idea, it’s comforting to hear him say he’s not going to keep messing with me or Morgan. And why not look around at the beautiful men? For the next hour or so, Danny rates the men at the pool while I keep our conversation on safe topics like what there is to do on the ship, food and drinks we must try, and some of the shows and activities available.
I’m shocked at how normal and surprisingly nice it is chatting with him. Once we get past his flirty, over-the-top need to be the center of attention, he settles down and turns out to be funny and clever. Okay, he’s still a bit much, but without the constant innuendos he’s more amusing than annoying. He’s also taking my mind off what did and didn’t happen last night. I’m sure things between Morgan and me will go back to normal once we’re home and I can manage my feelings again. Distance—that’s what we need. A little perspective is always a good thing.
“There you are.“
A large shadow crosses my lounger and I look up to see a very sweaty Morgan in low-slung swim trunks. God help me, my face is right at dick-level, and oh my, that’s an eyeful. I drag my gaze up his torso, over his pumped-up pecs, to his grinning face. “Mind if I join you?” He doesn’t wait for an answer, but hauls my lounger away from Danny’s, then pulls a chair from who knows where and wedges it in between us.
Danny gives him a once-over and my hackles rise. “Were you working out? You look all”—he gestures to encompass all of Morgan—“yummy and sweaty.“
I remind myself that Morgan is straight, so there’s no harm in Danny flirting. He won’t get anywhere.
For a moment, Morgan beams and nods. “I work out every day. Or do something physical. You know, hikes, bike rides—“ He interrupts himself and frowns like he’s remembered something, then changes the subject. “Xan isn’t into working out. We should talk about something we all like. What should we talk about?”
Danny barely manages not to choke on the sip of his drink he’s just taken as I stare incredulously at Morgan. He’s not usually so…abrupt? He’s an assertive guy, but forcefully inserting himself into the conversation, then changing the subject is massively out of character for him. “Danny was telling me about the Ensenada excursions.”
I glance at Danny, who has that wicked gleam in his eye again, and I brace myself for whatever’s coming. “I was telling Xan they should come with me tomorrow. We could do a little shopping, check out some restaurants or bars—“
“Xan and I already have plans to do that.”
I blink at Morgan because no we don’t. Lying isn’t something he usually does, mostly because he’s not good at it. We’d definitely talked about Ensenada, but I don’t recall any concrete plans. “We do?”
Morgan nods vigorously. “Yup. All arranged.”
I eye him skeptically but shrug. “Okay. Great.”
Danny’s visibly fighting a smirk as he gestures to my shoulders. “You’re starting to get a little pink. Here, hand me your sunscreen and I’ll put more on your shoulders and back.”
“I have it.“
Morgan dives for the tube of sunscreen, barely beating Danny to it. What the hell is going on? Morgan flips the cap open and squeezes some into his palm before turning me around. I swing my feet off the other side of the lounger so I’m not contorting myself into a pretzel, and then Morgan’s hands are smoothing sunscreen over my bare skin. “This is really something a friend should do, not a stranger. And I’ve known Xan for ages.”
At first Morgan’s lotion application is kind of perfunctory and haphazard, like how you’d end up applying it to a wiggling child. Except I’m not moving. Hell, I’m barely breathing. Once he figures out Danny isn’t going to wrestle him for the privilege of applying sunscreen to me, Morgan slows down and starts rubbing it into my skin in long, deep strokes. I’m not sure how to react, but groaning with pleasure is probably not appropriate. Though I’m not sure I can help it. Morgan’s fingers are really strong, digging into my tense shoulder muscles with the perfect amount of pressure. He’s also caressing my shoulders and back in long, languid strokes that feel sensual, even if it’s not intended that way. My body is reacting to the intimacy, getting all tingly and making my swim trunks tent. I’m in this push-pull moment of arousal, relaxation, and stress, and it’s messing with my head. Regardless, I can’t bring myself to tell him to stop. I’m a selfish, bad person.
“So, where did you two meet?“
Danny is sipping another fruity umbrella drink and trying not to laugh. Bastard.
“Xan and I have lived together for seventeen years.”
If I’d been drinking something, I’d have spit it out all over the poor woman in front of me. Technically, he’s not lying, but he’s making it sound like we live together instead of living in the same apartment at the same time.
Danny’s smile is mischievous, and that doesn’t bode well. “Really?”
From the corner of my eye, I can see Morgan nodding. “Yup. We’ve been inseparable ever since the day we met.”
Again, that’s not technically wrong, but it’s definitely not in the way he’s implying. What the hell has gotten into him? Danny makes a humming noise. “Tell me more.”
What the ever-loving fuck? I try to turn around but Morgan grips my shoulders, keeping me in place. “Sit still. You don’t want to burn.”
“Right, Xan. You don’t want to burn.”
When I get up from this lounger, I’m going to throttle them both. “Danny?”
“Mhmm?“
I can hear the goddamned amusement in his tone.
“Remember I know where you live on this ship.”
He snorts. “Right next door. So convenient. You could stop by for a bit.”
Morgan’s fingers tighten on my shoulders. “No. They’re busy.”
Danny doesn’t try to hide his laugh this time. “For the rest of the entire cruise?”
“Yes.”
The underlying growl to Morgan’s one-word answer has me looking over my shoulder at him again. “You okay?”
His touch is once again divinely confusing, and without thinking, I groan as he digs a thumb into a particularly sore spot. Morgan’s cheeks pink but his grin is triumphant and I’m even more bewildered. “I’m perfect.“
He calls over his shoulder to Danny. “Xan’s been my best friend since we were eighteen. He’s been there for me so many times I’ve lost count—helping me study for difficult classes, encouraging me at my wrestling competitions, and consoling me when whoever I was dating at the time dumped me.” His hands slow and then stop for several breaths, with no one saying a word. His voice drops and he leans closer, like his next words are only for me. “You’ve been my constant.” His tone has me turning all the way around to look at his face. He’s frowning, but his gaze is steady, holding mine. “My person. Right beside me no matter what.”
I swallow and sit on my hands so I don’t reach for him. “Yeah. And I always will be.“
There’s something in the way he’s looking at me that’s new.
But before I can figure it out, Danny clears his throat. “Xan, you better get some water. Staying hydrated is important.”
I glance at him, not sure why he’s saying that. “Yeah, okay.”
“I think you should get some now.“
Why is he pressing when I need to stay here and ask Morgan what’s going on?
Morgan nods encouragingly. “Hydration is very important. Will you grab me a water while you’re at the bar?”
Reluctantly, I get up. “Sure. Danny, you want anything?”
He shakes his head and waves me toward the bar. With one last look at Morgan, I go, wondering what the hell is even happening.