Chapter Eleven
EMMA
THIS ISN’T A DATE
Aiden put the lasagna in the oven as I ran up to my apartment to change clothes. Standing at the mirror, I lectured myself. Why was I making everything so hard? It was dinner and Suits. What was the big deal?
“Um, he’s your boss, Emma,” I whispered to myself in the mirror.
My boss.
Was he really just my boss, though? It felt like we were becoming friends as well, and that was a good thing, right? Friends were what I wanted. Friends were good. There was nothing wrong with having dinner and watching a show with a friend.
“You’re thinking about this too much, Emma. My goodness, put on sweatpants and a T-shirt.”
Pulling my top off and tossing it onto the bed, I pulled open my dresser and found the long-sleeve T-shirt I’d bought the other day.
The giant moose on the front was too cute to pass up.
Plus, it said What Moose I Do Today. I laughed at myself as I pulled off my skinny jeans and replaced them with comfy sweatpants.
I bent over and gathered my hair and pulled it into a pony that was half in, half out, to make a messy bun.
With a final look at myself, I nodded. “This isn’t a date, so why go all out?”
With a deep breath, I made my way out onto the balcony—and stopped in my tracks when I saw Aiden. Two glasses of wine sat on the table, and he stood a few feet away, looking into the telescope. My heart started to beat rapidly in my chest.
This isn’t a date.
“Hey, I was beginning to think you fell asleep in there.” He laughed and turned to face me. His eyes roamed over my body slowly before they stopped on what looked like my lips. Clearly, I was still reading into everything.
He’s probably thinking you look like something the dog would drag home.
Maybe I should have put a little bit of effort into looking decent. I sighed inwardly.
He walked to the table and grabbed both glasses of wine, handing me one when I approached. “You do drink wine, right?”
I took it and lifted my glass in a little salute. “Let’s just say I’ve never turned down a glass when offered to me.”
Aiden smiled widely, and my throat bobbed as I tried to swallow and failed. He had a dimple. Oh, my goodness, how had I not noticed the dimple in his right cheek? That dimple, those blue eyes against his black hair…a woman could get lost so easily looking at this man.
I cleared my throat. Not you though, Emma. He’s just a friend.
I broke eye contact and looked out at the view. “It’s so beautiful here, I still can’t get over it. What were you looking at?”
He motioned with the hand that held the glass of wine for me to look through the telescope. “Elk are beginning to come down from the tree lines into the meadows.”
“Oh my gosh! Really?” I set my glass of wine down and rushed to the telescope. I searched but couldn’t find any. “Where? I don’t see them.”
Aiden’s heat covered my back and everything stilled except for my heart. It went into double time as he leaned over and aimed the telescope up a bit.
The herd suddenly came into view, and I gasped. “Oh, my gosh. How many are out there?”
“A lot. That bull has been working overtime for his girls.”
I straightened and faced him. Before I could respond, I heard the bugle of an elk across the meadow. The bull I’d just been looking at bugled back. Aiden and I both grinned.
“Do you like wildlife, Emma?” His voice was low and soft as he asked, and I couldn’t ignore how it made me feel warm inside. The question wasn’t just a conversation starter. I knew what he did for a living, and I knew how important it was to him.
Picking up my wine again, I replied honestly, “Yes. It’s one of the reasons I moved up here. Estes Park holds some of my best memories.”
“As a child?”
“Ever.”
Aiden frowned, and it appeared he wanted to ask me to explain, but he let it go. “Would you like to go up into the park sometime? I’ll take you to an area away from the tourists and you can really get a feel for nature.”
Chewing on my bottom lip, I replied, “I would love that. Thank you.”
“Great, maybe the three of us can go up tomorrow. Before we know it, winter will be settling in and we’ll lose our chance.”
I smiled and nodded. “Sounds great. I’m looking forward to it.” After another few moments of silence, I said, “I’ll just go fix a couple salads to go with our meal.”
I didn’t stick around to see if Aiden was surprised by my quick departure, but I heard him following.
“Need help?” he asked, walking into the kitchen. “I put the lasagna in a bit ago and didn’t bother with the whole dish. Just a couple of big pieces so it would heat faster.”
I motioned to the cucumber. “How about you cut that up.”
Aiden set his wine glass down and got to work. “Do you like cooking?” he asked after a few moments.
I couldn’t help but smile. “Yes! At one point, I thought I might want to go to culinary school, but in the end, I went to college for education.”
“That’s a complete one-eighty.”
“I know,” I replied with a chuckle. “It seemed like the more responsible thing to do. A steady source of income, or so my mother said.”
He nodded. “What was your childhood like?”
I paused before quickly getting back to cutting up a tomato. “It was okay. How about yours? It must have been so fun growing up here. Did your family camp a lot?”
Aiden turned and looked at me, his brows pulled slightly in. “Was that your subtle way of saying you don’t want to talk about your childhood?”
I half shrugged.
“You don’t have to talk about it, but I would like to get to know you better, Emma.”
Looking at him, I couldn’t ignore the sparkle of curiosity in his eyes. I never spoke about my family, but for some reason, the way he quietly studied me made me want to share.
“I had what I think was a normal childhood, until it wasn’t. My father left when I was young and it…well…my mother didn’t handle it well. Things were difficult after he left. Let’s just say I spent more time over at my friends’ houses than I did at home.”
“Fair enough,” Aiden replied, not pushing me for more information.
He finished cutting up the cucumber, then picked up his wine.
“To answer your question, we did camp a lot. My folks moved to Estes Park after they got married and decided to open a store here. It had been a dream of my mother’s, and my dad moved heaven and earth to make it happen for her. ”
My heart swelled. “How sweet of your father to do that.”
“Yeah, he really loves Mom. He was a firefighter, so he just transferred and started working for the park.”
“Is that why you do what you do?”
He shrugged. “I guess it has something to do with it. But I’ve just loved that park for as long as I can remember. We would go for hikes all the time. I probably know that park better than I know my way around town.”
We both laughed.
“I knew from an early age I wanted to be a cop. I almost joined the Marines but ended up not taking that path.”
The bowl I’d just picked up fell from my hands and dropped to the island. I jumped at the sound.
Aiden swung around to face me. “Hey, you okay?”
My entire body began to tremble as the image of Ben in his Marine Corps uniform filled my head.
“What’s wrong?” He cupped my face in his hands and bent his head to look at me. “Talk to me, Emma.”
Pushing the memory away, I looked into Aiden’s eyes. An instant feeling of safety swept over me when our eyes locked. “I’m so sorry. I’m fine! Totally fine.” I forced myself to smile. “Clumsy is all.”
His hands fell to my upper arms while his eyes swept over my body, checking to make sure I really was okay. “Are you sure? You seemed scared to death there for a second.”
A nervous chuckle escaped my lips. “No. No. The bowl slipped and I guess the sound scared me because I wasn’t…um…expecting it.”
He studied me in that way of his, knowing I wasn’t telling him the truth, and that made my chest tighten with anxiety. How was he so in tune with my feelings when I hardly knew him?
“I’m okay,” I whispered.
With a slow nod, Aiden dropped his hands, and I instantly missed the warmth of his touch.
After finding my voice, I asked, “Why didn’t you join the military?”
“What?” he asked in a confused voice.
“You said you wanted to join the Marines but didn’t.”
“Oh, right. Lisa got pregnant, and her parents didn’t want her to be raising a kid all alone, and I agreed.
She lost the baby not long after we got married.
It was hard on her, she blamed herself because she didn’t want the baby at all.
She was also angry that she’d been forced to marry me and give up her plans to leave Estes Park, all for nothing. ”
My head jerked up at that. He must have felt my eyes on him, because he met my gaze. I could see the sadness clearly. Surely, he couldn’t really believe she felt that way? Or…did she actually say those things?
I broke eye contact. “And Lisa didn’t enjoy the park?”
Aiden laughed. “No. She wasn’t the outdoor type. She had plans to move to New York after graduation, but the pregnancy changed all of that. I knew she had regrets. That was part of our marriage troubles.”
“Did she ever go to New York?” I asked as I pulled the lasagna out of the oven.
“I took her once for our anniversary. She said it wasn’t what she thought it was going to be.
I think in her mind, she had some sort of big fantasy about it.
Still, she wanted to travel more, and I was trying to move up into the position I have now and taking time off wasn’t something I could do.
She was pretty angry at me for picking my job over her, even though I promised we could travel more after I got the promotion.
It was just hard, ya know? We got married young and, well… I don’t know. It was hard.”
After cutting a small piece of lasagna for myself and setting it on a plate, I looked at Aiden. “Marriage is very hard.”
He nodded. “Emma…do you mind if I ask why you got divorced?”
I could actually feel my face drain of color. I cleared my throat and faced him. “If you don’t mind, Aiden, that’s a part of my life I’d like to forget.”
He frowned.
“Let’s just say I was in a marriage that wasn’t healthy at all.”
“How bad was it?”
My gaze fell to the floor.
Aiden’s cell phone rang, and I breathed a sigh of relief.
“Hello? Oh, hey, yeah.” He turned and walked toward his office. “Sherry, yes, I remember you.”
A heavy sensation hit me square in the chest as I realized he was speaking to a woman. It was like someone had taken a piece of granite and dropped it into my body.
Jealous much, Emma?
I sighed and shook my head. “You vowed to start over, and falling for a guy was not part of the plan,” I whispered to myself.
Trying not to think too much about it, I finished my plate, grabbed my freshly made salad, and headed into the family room. I would probably end up spending the evening alone, and I was okay with that. It was for the best, if I had to be truthful with myself.
Hitting Netflix, I searched for Suits, finding the episode Aiden had left off on. I got myself settled on the sofa, pulled the TV tray closer to me and dug into the food. I moaned and closed my eyes as I took in all the flavors of the lasagna.
“You weren’t even going to wait for me?” Aiden said with a chuckle as he sat down beside me with his plate.
“Oh, sorry! I figured you might end up going out tonight after all.”
He gave me a confused look. “Why would you think that?”
“Um, well…I guess I thought maybe you were making plans for a date?”
Throwing his head back and laughing, Aiden bumped me on the shoulder and said, “That’s funny. No, Sherry is a volunteer at our church. She’s fairly new to town. She wanted to know if I could help out with setting up something for the kids on Sunday after church.”
“That’s nice of you,” I said, trying to act casual. I needed to get myself in check if I wanted to hang out with Aiden as friends.
“Oh man, Emma. This is the best lasagna I’ve ever had. Is it all homemade?”
It was my turn to laugh. “No. I bought the pasta at the store and the sauce is from a jar. I do have one secret ingredient, but I can’t share it with you.”
He took another bite. “I’m going to have to keep you on even after Hadley doesn’t need a nanny, just for this lasagna.”
Smiling, I tried to ignore the way that sent my heart beating faster. I hit play on the remote, and we were soon immersed in the show and our lasagna.