Chapter 17
SPACE AND TIME
ELI
After our argument, things are off-track with Stella. We orbit each other carefully. I’m afraid one wrong word will shatter what little peace we’ve kept for Aiden’s sake.
Stella refuses to back down about the party—she doesn’t want me anywhere near Jerrod. Marjorie must suspect something’s going on too. She eyes our every move but doesn’t ask questions.
I try to get back to where we were, of course, and find any little way I can make a kind gesture. I ask Renae to send Stella flowers—my first attempt to soften things—with a cute poem I wrote.
It says:
You drew the line I won’t cross.
I’m not invited to the party, but you’re the boss.
But I’m still here, giving you space and time,
waiting for the day you’ll finally be mine.
Renae snorts on our video call, spraying soda everywhere. With an agonizing sigh, I drop my forehead into my hand and wait a minute for her to clean up.
“What? Is it too cheesy?” My brows stitch. “It took me an hour to come up with that.”
I'm staying at my house in Denver tonight, given our late game where we lost to Calgary. My teammates don’t explicitly come out and say it, but I botched several opportunities. They’re downstairs now, sulking and icing up, because we all took a beating in the game.
Once in bed, I know I’ll stare at the ceiling because Stella isn’t by my side. How funny, the simple things we get used to with a special person in our life.
I’ve slept at the rink the past few nights on the most uncomfortable couch in the office that the 80s would like back. At least there, I’m in Boulder where I feel closest to Aiden and Stella. Where, if she should need me, I can come running at a moment’s notice.
Renae returns onscreen to our call. She puts on her headset, clearing her throat. “Is your second chance getting complicated, sir?”
I huff a breath. “You warned me.”
“I did. It doesn’t mean I enjoy being right.”
I tell her everything. Jerrod’s threats. Stella’s fear. Our fight. The party I’m not allowed anywhere near. The way Stella’s drawn a hard line, and the way I’m choosing not to cross it—even though it hurts like hell.
“Jerrod has the upper hand. He’ll take her back to court to fight for a new custody agreement, unless she dumps me. She won’t risk losing time with Aiden. But she can’t bring herself to walk away from me again. So we’re stuck right now.”
Renae listens without interrupting. When I finally stop talking, she studies me for a long moment.
“Don’t give up yet—give her that space and time she needs. See where you stand in a week or two,” she advises.
“What about Aiden’s birthday party at the rink? Instead, Stella’s holding a Lego building party in the craft store for him and a handful of his friends.”
“Oh. I’ll cancel the rink party then?”
“I don’t have a choice, do I?”
“Well…” she draws the word out. “As much as I know you care for Aiden, there are twenty other children in the hockey class who might enjoy a party.”
I suck in a breath. Yes. This could work. “Renae. You. Are. Brilliant.”
“Thank you, sir.”
“A Christmas party is exactly what I need.” I can already picture it. For a guy who lost his holiday spirit the moment Stella slammed the bedroom door, energy sparks inside of me for the first time all week. “And, since I won’t be under Stella’s strict budget…”
Renae groans. “Oh, no.”
“I want this rink to bleed JOY, in capital letters,” I dramatically emphasize the theme. “Everything kids love. Cotton candy. Balloons. Bounce houses. Clowns.”
“Clowns can be terrifying to some,” she retorts.
“Okay. No clowns. But I can get Michelle there with the Aspens mascot. And some of my teammates might dress in superhero costumes or as cartoon characters. Oh, and in the parking lot, let’s do pony rides and a petting zoo, if the weather permits.”
“This is becoming a circus.”
“Oh, oh—gift bags,” I continue. “Everyone gets one. I’ll put up a Christmas tree in the lobby this week. Each child can write a wish to Santa on an ornament, and I’ll make it all come true. They get what they want this year.”
“Hello-o?” Renae taps the screen, looking all around it. “Am I in some scary Hallmark Christmas movie right now?”
“Stop. Can’t help it if I’m excited. I need this right now—say, can you rent me a Santa suit? I should appear at the end of the party wearing it and hand out the gifts. This entire thing sounds awesome. I wish to be a kid again and attend it myself.”
“You are out of control.” She crosses her arms and cocks her head.
“But you’ll make it happen because it’s your job?”
“Of course, sir.”
“You’re the best. Send out the invitations to all the families and send me posters to hang up at the rink. You have my credit card details. Buy yourself a year’s worth of Mountain Dew, on me.”
“I’ve definitely earned it.”
“Hey, Renae? Do you think Aiden and all the children will enjoy this party?”
“Yes. It’ll be very memorable.”
“Cool. Thanks.” I click off with a grin ear-to-ear.
Tyler, Mason, and Sean are still up, chilling out, watching a movie downstairs. They’re nursing beers, silently cursing me for my part in the game loss, and icing their bruises.
I enter the room like a wrecking ball, popping M&M’s from the candy jar, and pacing.
“Stella and I are having our first argument, and it’s a biggie.” I come clean. “I don’t want to lose her, but it weighs on me, so I played shitty on the ice, coming from a place of fear. That’s on me. And I apologize for it right now to you guys.”
They all mumble that it wasn’t just me. Sean’s glove acted as if it had a hole in it. Mason couldn’t win a face-off to save his life. And Tyler says his girlfriend gave him a hex or something.
“But guys, cheer up. I have something we all need about now, a way to bring the joy back into the season.” I talk fast and fill them in on all the new plans for the party.
Mason grumbles and sits upright, running his hand through his mop of curly hair. “Slow down there, Hurricane Eli.”
“Good advice, but I can’t.” I have a new mission ahead of me. “We have a huge party to pull off in a very short time.”
“Which sounds like code for ‘I need you guys to help me,’” Sean snickers.
“Good read of the room. That’s exactly what I need.”
“I’ll get Michelle to bring the mascot. There, I contributed.” Tyler hardly moves from his lounging spot in making that statement.
“Come on. You all jumped in with me in getting this Wishes Granted Hockey Program off the ground. It’s been a great start, and now we can finish the classes up with a bang.”
“You’re just doing this to impress Stella.”
“I could think of a dozen other things to impress Stella. No. This is for the children who signed up, getting a chance to be on the ice with us, full hockey gear, and lessons that their parents otherwise couldn’t afford.
Think of the how excited they’ll be at the party.
Or how full your hearts will be, knowing you’re making a difference in their lives. ”
My little pep talk works. They offer to help decorate and string holiday lights all over the rink, and they agree to wearing superhero costumes. By the time I exit just as fast as I entered, they’re re-energized to see this thing through.
I worry that after this week and the parties, Christmas is coming. Will I spend it alone, or will Stella and I patch things up? Or—and this one scares me—will she succumb to Jerrod’s demands and leave me again?
It’s with these things in my head that I keep Aiden a little longer on the ice, skating with him and teaching him stick control, to spend more time with him alone. Marjorie is waiting patiently in the warming area, though.
“Guess you'd better get home.” I gesture him toward the exit of the ice. We sit on the bench and untie our skates.
“Aren’t you coming home, too?” He squints up at me.
“I have some work to do in the office.” A lame excuse, and I can tell the disappointment as he peers down at his boot. “But hey, you have your birthday party Saturday, and I’ll see you at the Christmas party here on Sunday. Lots to look forward to.”
It’s enough to bring a smile to his face. To ward off any disappointment he might have felt for me not attending the party at the shop, we had told him a little lie that I had mandatory practice that day.
“Your father will be visiting at your birthday party. How do you feel about seeing him again?” I hesitate to ask, but I’m curious what he thinks of Jerrod. I’ve hardly heard Aiden mention him these past few months.
He doesn’t say much, and shrugs. “How much longer will you and Mom be like this? Because it’s getting boring without you around.”
Boring can be interpreted as he misses me, not a word about Jerrod, and that puts all kinds of warm and fuzzy feelings into my heart. “I know. I’m sorry these adult things can be so… so…”
“Confusing? Can’t you just say you’re sorry and look at her like this—” He morphs his face into a sweet one, eyes slow blinking, lips in a soft curve, and hands clasped under his chin, like a begging cherub. “Works for me every single time.”
“Good advice. I might give that a try.” I stifle a laugh and reach out and hug him, our first ever. I have so much I want to say to him, like I wish I was his father, and I wish we were a family. But I can’t. “Come on, your grandma is waiting.”
I push through the doors to the warming area and nod. “Hello Marjorie.”
“A word, please?” She gestures with her head to the side, out of Eli’s earshot. “I dropped in on the workers at the building today. They’re making so much progress on the apartment. It’ll be beautiful when it’s done. I don’t even know how to thank you.”
“None needed. I wanted you to have a safe place to live.”
She smiles sheepishly. “For the record, I’m more Team Eli than Team Jerrod. I never really cared for him, more like put up with him. I think you are far better suited for my daughter. Just wish the two of you would kiss and make up already.”